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winninglosing

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winninglosing 2 days ago

@destraht Hmm. Well I appreciate your wisdom and advice man. I will definitely have more questions in the future.

destraht 2 days ago

@winninglosing I'm not hard suggesting that you detach from these people. It may be inevitable though. A lot of it depends on you and them. I hard broke with almost everyone I knew at 27 and then didn't have any friends for several months. It freed me up to reconnect with lost people whom better served me. Its easy though to price yourself out of the friendship market if you can't find people.

winninglosing 3 days ago

@destraht Interesting. I am noticing myself distancing myself from conversations of any depth/conversations at all with my family, friends, girls because I find them too painful / useless / a waste. This may be what you are talking about? Are you suggesting I purposefully detach myself from these people?

destraht 3 days ago

@winninglosing The risk is not that you won't be able to manage or navigate these social interactions but that they bleed you every time that they occur. As you are having dozens more epiphanies the vague uneasiness can come into a sharper focus so that you exit the encounter diminished. You have a decent idea about their mind while they couldn't begin to comprehend yours. Alienation.

destraht 3 days ago

@winninglosing I felt myself being emptied out after countless low value interactions. My old world traveled mentor has a masters in developmental psychology. He would perform an excellent skit about trying to related to the average sports hour bar guy. Basically if he related too much then they would think he is gay. Comment about hot chick resets them, more relating confuses them. Bad alienation

winninglosing 3 days ago

@destraht I have taken lots of philosophy in school and continue to read it in my spare time. These definitely create a foundation of good thinking patterns and arguments begin to become familiar in other areas of life. Thank you for this advice.

winninglosing 3 days ago

@destraht I get that - I am confident that I know how to manage these social characteristics.

winninglosing 3 days ago

@destraht True. However, I am sociable and have lots of acquinances. I just don't talk anything deep with these people anymore - I am hoping to one day find some 'alpha double plus'' who I can talk with like Hemholtz Watson. I realized before the book they don't want to talk about tough or challenging things, so I just don't talk with them about it. Just bro out about gym stuff.

destraht 3 days ago

@winninglosing One tip that I can offer is that if you are into fucking your head now that you should try to pace it out with more traditional building materials such as the Greek and Roman texts. Its incredibly easy to drink too heavily from the paradigm smashing hose and to find yourself without a foundation. Mostly that you'd become even more alienated and without an immediate remedy.

destraht 3 days ago

@winninglosing One particularity is that almost all venues are segmented for specific behavior and subject matter. A good example is naked titties at the beach but not at the park. Talking light business and sports at bar but nothing of substance. You are standing there with a beer in your hand and its too loud to talk so you drink more and all interaction is subtle and passive-aggressive.

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Did I end it too early?

Thank you man. What you said makes a lot of sense and I appreciate you taking the time.

The other user who responded says i shouldn’t reach out at all. As an endorsed contributor I tend to side with you - thoughts on his comments?

Context | Full Comments | submitted 5 months ago by WinningLosing
Did I end it too early? How might I reinstate LTR?

Fuck. I don’t want to hear that but you are right, I know it.

Thanks man.

Context | Full Comments | submitted 5 months ago by WinningLosing
Did I end it too early?

Hey man, may you please check out my new post? Ill link it here for convenience's sake.

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Context | Full Comments | submitted 5 months ago by WinningLosing
Did I end it too early? How might I reinstate LTR?

Hmm - I am definitely surprised she is not begging for me back.

Thing is, I don't want to be done, so why should I?

That all being said, I appreciate your advice and time.

Any other thoughts people?

Context | Full Comments | submitted 5 months ago by WinningLosing
Did I end it too early? How might I reinstate LTR?

She wants to do LDR when she goes away. I will never do LDR. So not her terms.

Im just agreeing to having fun dating for (up to) next 4-5 months. You don't feel theres anyway to not lose frame?

Even if I do lose a bit of frame, my frame is solid in most all other regards - it should be fine no?

Context | Full Comments | submitted 5 months ago by WinningLosing
Did I end it too early?

Anyone else agree with random? So you think I was right to tell her not to go or we would break up?

Context | Full Comments | submitted 5 months ago by WinningLosing

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