Question here... How would Teasing/playfully disrespecting her be beneficial to us? Wouldn't making a woman potentially feel insecure/nervous like that be counter productive?

I thought, like in the suggested readings, being a "value giver" was the way to go. Disrespecting may go against this.

Please correct me if I'm wrong, I'm still very new to Redpill and welcome any criticism/advise.

I found the guide useful as a reminder, but on about 50% of the points I had to change/correct them in my head as I was reading them, because they were too narrow. That is, they were good points, but they were just one way of achieving the equal results. So, someone would get good results following your guide, but also as good results following a slightly different guide (which may be more in line with their values), like how in early MMA people thought BJJ was the only way to win and gradually we find more and more ways.

For example: You describe only the dominant extrovert, not the dominant introvert; you only describe the dominant bad guy not the dominant good guy (conflating goodness with betaness); you say dangerous and disagreeable not friendly and harmless, when in fact you can also be friendly and dangerous simultaneously. Some of the things you say you should do, is really a case of where you should do them if you want to, and not do them if you don't want to -- really it's still just doing what you think is in your self-interest as you did as a beta, but coming from a bold and confident state of mind, rather than a timid and fearful one, which will naturally make you think that different things are in your self-interest and you will act differently.

Voluntaryism.

People need to not get "nice guy" confused with "good guy" - the Alpha White-Hat is as exciting to most women as the alpha black-hat - there's a reason why terms such as "cop whore" exist. Women tingle for authority figures just as much as for rebels.

What about being a Bad Boy that can provide as well? Rich, good career, etc. How do you make it clear that those features go into second place, and communication the Bad Boy > Provider?

Okay...this shit is starting to look like Cosmo

Here's some more information behind the psychology of women preferring alpha male and maybe dark triad traits compared to beta male traits.

http://www.riseofsigma.com/2014/01/the-female-imperative-dna-bad-boys.html

It's strange how after a few years I wouldn't be able to tell you the recipe to being this man. How I got there, I almost don't even remember anymore, all I know is that these traits are who I am and have become. Life is so different now... I can't even picture who I was three years ago.

Still, after so long, I feel like I owe so much to this community. I hope more Men continue to learn to respect themselves and become real leaders in their work life and put forth the effort and have the courage to better themselves. To learn how to build strong relationships while keeping these things in mind and remembering that God could not have given you a better blessing than the opportunity to be a Man. Live life it to it's fullest the way every great Man should.

I agree with this list, but the number of losers faking the bad boy style is much more than the number of really confident guys with these traits. I find fakers more sickening than boring "good" guys. They even fail being the provider.

I'd like to point out that by getting married, you severely handicap yourself with #4 and #11 in particular. You're signaling your intent to stay with her no matter what, and you give up a lot of the power to end the relationship if she's not meeting your needs.

BP society tells us that marriage is the ultimate expression of love. Well, too bad most women are fucking sociopaths who will lose attraction to you as soon as you display commitment to them. Marriage used to be a better deal for everyone involved when women couldn't really make their way on their own, but that's no longer true thanks to feminism and now we have this wonderful dynamic of "I can leave you and take half your shit".

In conclusion: don't fucking get married. It's not worth it.

I see a pitfall with 5, entitlement. A man is entitled to the result of the work he's put in, the fruit of his labour. He's not entitled to things he hasn't worked for, or tried to get but made too many mistakes to achieve successfully.

You want to act like the world owes you something, maybe give off that vibe. But the world doesn't owe you shit.

13 . Be in Jail so you can knock up the desperate girls you enticed behind the water cooler.

For me, things started going considerably better in the hook-up department, when I started smiling more, walking more upright, being more polite- but also.. and this is a rather small thing-- But I just started to not immediately reply to messages.. That wasn't even intentional, I just stopped caring as much as I used to.

Though I read some time ago, that apparently that can be seen as "hard to get", and apparently some women consider those who aren't providing immediate replies more of a "catch" or something.. To some extent I do the teasing thing... But in a rather playful/silly/goofy sort of way

Though- Pointing out the obvious, I must say that it all really depends on circumstances, timing and best of all; coincidences.. Coincidences that you can put a focus on- For example.. you met a person once, and had a great time; but you still don't know much to break the ice with.. but something memorable happened so you can go: "Hey! Remember that time when that dude came running right into the street light?" and continue the convo from there..

If that doesn't work, you can always try the hallpass one: "How much does a polar bear weigh?" ---"Enough to break the ice!--Hello reaches for handshake I'm DeviousVerendus, nice to meet you!"

would^only^^recommend^^^if^^^you're^^^^^both-drunk

Where would self-deprecating humour fall here?

I've heard positives and negatives in the use of it, and I wonder if it's applicable in these 12

This post defines TRP in the least amount of words.

I get this, I've read it before but it's really only true for some women, not all of them

I'm curious whether the Provider is still considered Alpha in this. If a man is confident, direct, dominant, indifferent, a leader, masculine and teasing, is he still classified as Alpha? I would be inclined to say yes. As for "Bad Boy Traits", half of the 12 are simply signs of a self-realized and mature man who knows who he is, what he wants, where he's going, and isn't willing to settle on anything.

I admit those are attractive.

But its confidence with something concrete to back it up, not empty arrogance. Sometimes too much of it also crosses to the point of compensation for what might be insecurity (annoying) - its about just the right amount of it.

The entitlement can play wrong sometimes though, and depends on what you demand. You can end up as being too demanding - too costly like a brat.

But for the most part, yeah hot

I definitely need to work on indifference, I find myself in pointless, heated arguments and feel ashamed I got to that point halfway through. How do I stop trying so hard men?

I think it's fair to say you can't be everything on this list at once.

There's a wrong way and a right way to go about this. Here's an example:

If I meet a man, and he has a plan and a direction and a goal, that's very attractive. If you watch the TV Show "Mad Men", Don Draper has a lot of scenes like this, where someone is pitching a sale and Don just takes the reigns and takes control.

It basically boils down to "this man knows what he wants, he has a plan on how to get it, and he's ready to overcome any obstacles that get in his way."

But there's a wrong way to go about it too. Pete from the show "Mad Men" is a good example of this. Pete has a plan too, but it's often a plan that nobody agrees with. And if Pete doesn't get his way, he'll throw a fit like a little baby.

submitted to r/cosmopolitan

10/10 for homosexual undertones

I don't believe in the dual strategy. I think it's based on antiquated evolutionary psychology. But if it did exist how exactly are you applying it? Do you wait for your wife to ovulate and pull out these traits and spend the rest of the month working nights and rubbing her feet while you watch Will and Grace together? Seriously everyone fantasies about being the alpha here despite being married.

Goddamn do I love this post.

I'm in the minority here and say that feminine and masculine energy don't matter as much as long as you make masculine moves at the right moment. Why do so many pretty boys get girls? They still make masculine moves.

The problem is, in today's society, it's mostly women who display/exhibit these traits. And they do it because they foolishly think that because THEY find those traits attractive in men, that men will find those traits attractive in women.

Feminism really is the world's biggest shit test.

I like this list, short and to the point. I'd say that traits 1-5 are definitely the essential foundation which open the door for the others to exist.

What's funny is these traits are associated with a "bad-boy" persona, when in reality they are the indicators of a self-actualized man. When you start respecting yourself, your needs, your desires, and take control of your life these traits will become a pronounced part of who you are naturally.

The entitlement one is a bit far. That one crosses you over into asshole territory.

I crave a lot of these characteristics in my women too. Specifically, 1, 2, 6, 7, and 8.

EDIT: Others disagree I'm guessing?

This post reeks of mental masturbation. Blah blah blah be confident blah blah blah what is confidence is it with empty arrogance or without blah blah blah, etc. Everyone has their interpretation lets not get caught in semantics. In essence this shit is useless unless you go out and act.

Ain't no bigger provider than big daddy government.

Point 4 pretty much kills all the other points doesn't it ?

I dont give a fuck about the other points. Done.

I became a lot more successful at dating when I figured out a few of these on my own.

I was amazed how effective teasing is.

Does anybody know how to really become more masculine? I hear all the time, but nobody seems to know how, and no, lifting weights doesn't do that much good in my experiencew: theres a lot of bulky docile guys and I also lifted for a year without much results in this area.

I'm done with this kind of list which tells me how I should be.

Now I do what I enjoy, I don't let anyone disrespect me, I put myself before everyone else and I respect myself.

I think that those traits are the result of some changes you initiated yourself, not something that one should try to 'get' in the first place.

Great post man, brief, but succinct and salient. Stickied.

On the "Bad Boy" trait- I was on a date with a plate recently and I offhandedly mentioned that I got a speeding ticket that week. This sparked something in her and she brought it up a few weeks later about how "bold" I was. This was an eye opener; doing 41 in a 40 zone apparently can increase the chance that you get laid, pathetic as it sounds.

The title of this post read like a youtube advert.

Great post though!

One who puts on the persona of a king will be treated like a king by others

Oh god, that list has made me realise I've been doing it all wrong with my crush. She likes me because she knows I'd be a good long term partner, a provider, a friend. That's what he husband already gives, and the reason she she won't gamble on a fling.

Oh well.

I like how a bunch of the opposites in paranthesis are characteristics plenty desirable in women (soft, caring, attentive, friendly, etc) supporting the idea of men and women being desirable to each other when they are complementary, ie.: no woman will be attracted to a man with ladylike characteristics :)

Jeeesus, I've been acting this way around a girl I've known for a while. She has a boyfriend of 4-5 years who is a nurse, calls himself a "gamer", talks about comics and zombie apocalypse type shit. He also dominates most conversations, but not in a good way. He literally lets no one else talk and she'll continually tell him to get to the point and to "hurry up, this is taking too long". There are other girls in this group and I can see/feel the inner eye rolling going on.

We are all around 30, mind you, so we've got a wall to deal with. I do notice though when he's not around that she is flirty and will make chances to playfully hit me and makes those somewhat subtle sex eyes at me. She'll ask about other girls I hang out with in a curious manner as if to compliment me on my conquests.

It's funny, I have no real interest in pulling her away from here bf, but I really wouldn't mind if they broke up because he really is an annoying prick-good guy, just too much. She dated one of my old roommates a long time ago and it was a much better social situation. As of late, probably because of this sub, I've had a renaissance with my old personality. I've never been sensitive or "beta" but we all go through lulls, I've recently been feeling better, more unapologetic, and dominant/confident when going out. I can tell they notice it.

Im not sure how 2 and 4 fit together. If youre being indifferent, you cant really be direct/ decisive at the same time.

i know semantics is pretty trivial, but i think we should really make an effort to ensure that our post titles resemble a "Cosmopolitan" magazine cover as little as possible. e.g. 10 sizzling moves that are sure to make him scream..

On the subject of smiling too much, how do you deal with, "you should smile more!" shit testing?

So a new person like myself just needs to practice these? I've always been a beta nice guy and this post is golden. I just struggle with these behaviors. It's like an instinct to just carry on being a beta faggot.

Blah blah blah. All the betas on here still looking to find their game on reddit

Good list. It's a travesty that most of these are associated with "Bad Boys" and not just men in general. I'd add only one to 10: the ability to go from cute and cuddly to dangerous and scary in the blink of an eye is fucking gold.

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How is entitlement different from being needy?

Great post, and I'm not gonna bother summarizing what everyone else said about why these are important ideologies to hold. But one key thing I haven't seen while skimming the comments, but what I really liked here in this post was that there is a solid comparison ie: 12. Teasing - playfully... (provoking her instead of trying to....)

That makes the important distinction of what someone new (like me) might take something in a different direction, or have a wrong basis of comparison. So TLDR; thanks for the post that actually can get some shit done in my mind.