So my girlfriend and I have been dating for about a full year in a half and I thought everything was going great. This weekend I went on a 5 day vacation (July 1- July 5) with my family and left her in my home state. Day 4 into the trip I get a text from a mutual friend that says "you're girlfriend disappeared for an hour with a guy (we will call him Jim) and Jim came back and said 'they cuddled and held hands'."

Okay, so where to start. She left with some guy for an hour at a group gathering, and he claims they just cuddled and held hands. Just on the chance that it was totally innocent, why the fuck would he say that?

I felt sick to my stomach. Apparently she had a party at her place on July 3rd where this all took place.

So she decides to have a party at her house immediately after her boyfriend leaves?

So a little background into our relationship and Jim. We started our relationship by casual hook-up but it had to be in secret, Jim was a mutual friend of ours and really like my girlfriend in high school. They even dated for like a month more or less. So Jim would've been hurt if he found out that we were hooking up. He found out and got mad and there was some yelling but I thought he got over it. It's been three years since they even romantically did anything. I thought I was good to leave them alone but I was wrong.

So I can't figure out if he was hooking up with this chick when the other dude was still dating, because that would just give the guy an even bigger incentive to bang his girlfriend. So many red flags, I won't even list them.

An aside on my girlfriend, she's super independent and believes that you should always trust your partner not to cheat on you and to let them be with who they want for friends.

Oh, so he's good then.

She's always told me that if your partner cheats on you to break up with them. Now she's broken my trust so do I just end it? Or do I forgive her? Anyway now I don't know what to do. Is this even considered cheating? Did Jim lie and do more that innocent cuddling and hand holding? What do I say to my girlfriend about it? Why didn't she tell me instead of our mutual friend? Just lend me a hand.

This is so fucked up I don't even know where to start. So usually if two people leave in a party, and they want to make it innocent, they would just say they went for a walk. This retard says they cuddled and held hands, so tried to downplay what happened.

TL;DR My girlfriend may or may not have cheated on me and I have no way of knowing how to approach it. Edit: I haven't talked to her about it yet. I'm returning to my home state today in the afternoon and talking to her then. Update: I have just landed back home I will talk to her in about an hour. I've decided to have a slow deliberate conversation and see how it goes. Update #2: I did a lot of investigating before talking to my girlfriend. I called my friend to confirm what had happened. Then I called Jim up and he apologized profusely and reaffirmed the story, that they had cuddled and held hands under the stars. So when I confronted my girlfriend about it she said she didn't know what I was talking about. So I told her everything I've told you guys and she explained to me her side of the story. She told me that it was completely platonic and she has no feelings for him (Which I believe) and he has way overblown the situation. All she wants from Jim is to be his friend and nothing more, but she says that even 3 years later he can't get over it. (which I also believe because Jim is extremely emotional)

So the male gets super apologetic and still sticks with his story. He may as well have sent a video of them fucking. And then the girl denies they even held hands or cuddled? What would make him want to say that?

She broke down crying and it made me feel bad that I didn't go to her first. I got really nervous and made a serious error in judgement. The more I think about it the more ridiculous it seems.

So she starts crying and making him feel guilty and he immediately thinks that he is being crazy. Why the fuck would this guy lie about holding hands and cuddling with his girlfriend, WHILE apologizing? Bringing the waterworks on command.

My girlfriend has been perfect to me and I've never even been slightly nervous about her cheating so for her to cuddle with an "ex" of over three years ago is absurd. She hates cuddling. I think she didn't even realize what she was doing had crossed a line. I think that she thought she was within her bounds to lay down next to Jim and have a conversation, which personally I think it is.

WTF? Where are they laying down? In a bed? This guy is a fucking idiot.

It ended when she deleted and blocked all of Jim contacts because she says that if he can't be her friends without having feelings then they can't be friends at all. I feel shitty for breaking up a good friendship that my girlfriend had but I think it was for the betterment of Jim. I just wish I hadn't assumed so much.

And it ends with the guy thinking that he's a jealous asshole for thinking that his girlfriend would do anything. When I read this I thought this guy is so out of touch it's unbelievable.

But then it got worse. I read the comments, and almost all of them were saying shit like "just talk to her and be direct, don't assume anything, tell her you're concerned" (this was before the updates of course). Some comments even suggested that he was being unreasonable.

There were a few classic TRP comments, but they were downvoted to the very bottom.