It should be well known that shit tests are subconscious and instinctive, but some have a hard time grappling with this concept. They think women are doing this deliberately, or that we think women are doing this deliberately: Well they are and they aren't. The mods of seddit call these, instead, "congruence tests" which is a better word in a way, but it leaves open the question "Congruence to what?"
It isn't necessarily "Congruent to the persona you're projecting", because if there is no attraction they won't test you. Women are literally, and instinctively, testing your metal, determining so-to-speak how much of a man you are: how strong, dominant, and masculine you are.
You'll understand exactly what shit tests are, and what they are about, in the act of sexual intercourse as when she climbs toward orgasm, she will claw at you, try to tear your flesh with her hands, and bite you. The proper response to this shit test is to hold your ground, let her do whatever damage she aims for, and then destroy her in your own way: that is, agree and amplify.
Women don't mean to do this, like any shit test, but it is a consequence of her instincts to "test you" in this way. The beta response is to react to her "hurting you", and her response to this will be her complete disappointment, and a great deal of loss of attraction. You're the man, compared to her you can not be hurt, especially not in bed. If you understand this, you'll understand the essence of every other shit test.
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PurpleLocust 11y ago
hey hey hey, lets not pretend that bondage is the same as masochism
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kbrugger 11y ago
I'm sorry dude, but if you've never been with a girl, how do you expect to understand what this guy is talking about?
This post is absolutely accurate. Women do that, don't ask me why, and it doesn't have anything to do with masochism or sadism or bondage or any of that. It's like an instinctive test indeed.
They don't really wanna hurt you, but they're expecting you to endure and "be a man".
It's not as bad as it sounds though, it can indeed make you feel like a man. But maybe some women exagerate and get too violent.
squarehouse 11y ago
You're just reading my post with the wrong tone, is all. No, I don't mind getting clawed or bit.
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squarehouse 11y ago
Maybe it's just the girl I'm with then. She doesn't mean to do it, and feels bad seeing the bruising she does to me, but it's one of her tells. I asked her about it and she doesn't do this while she's orgasming, but while she is climbing up to orgasm. This is pretty much when it clicked.
I've had women do this before, so I know it can't be that uncommon. I know all women are different, but there is a distinctive need to explain this instinct. Men don't have it...few of us have any compulsion to bite women during sex. I also doubt that men are anywhere near as lacking in violition and inhibition as women are during sex, we are still largely conscious. Or maybe I'm just speaking of my own case.
That's the mistake /u/johnnybigoode was making...he thought I was talking about some conscious, freely-willed, act of volition on the woman's part (basically, illiterate, given what I actually wrote). Your mode towards a woman in bed is the same as the mode that brought her into bed: Change her mood, not her mind. If she is conscious, aware of her thoughts and feelings, and knows what she's doing and about to do, and isn't restraining herself, trying not to let herself go, then you're not doing it right. You're not raping her, but a part of you inside her mind, needs to be. She needs to be overwhelmed.
Seduction isn't just the phase that is associated with having sex, but it's the whole process of bringing about the sex; and yet, the whole process of seduction, is the same as sex.
/SRSbait
legendofpasta 11y ago
Good post. An angle on compliance tests I hadn't considered before.
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I have an idea of the general gist of the shit test, can someone point me to a concise definition?
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You...and this subreddit...are amazing.
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as they say-all's fair in love and war. is anything we do as bad as cheating or shit tests? who knows. thanks!
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Testing your mettle not metal.