As someone who tends to begin conversations with questions and then complain that people 'just don't know how to carry a conversation', this is helpful.

So... You read day game ? Cool

I am not really the type of guy who likes small talks and thinks they are difficult to initiate. However, my view changed few weeks ago. I was running late to pick up a package at a UPS store because the bus was late. I got there right before they close. I just had to tell the employee I was scared of being late and this was enough to start a conversation with the employee sharing similar experiences with public transits.

On my way back to my place, I was just thinking "this was easy" and I started being less anxious starting small talks. One thing that helped me that day was the fact I was out of breath because I was running. This basically allowed to start talking without over-analyzing everything like I usually do to block myself. I just did it without any preventing thought. I just said what was on my mind because I was too tired to overthink it.

I'd like add I went on a date with a Ukranian last night. My fourth in 2 months.

They are the WORST aka Russia/Ukrainian/Eastern Block at conversations. They do not get banter, and they also are terrible at flirting.

Do not take them on a date. Its painful. I literally left after 10 minutes.

And what happens if I approach a girl and just go to the point? Example: Asking her name, talk a little, ask her number.

Someone's been reading Day Bang it seems

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Lesson 1) Refrain the urge to ask personal questions at the beginning. Lesson 2) Talking about the environment or commenting on a object near you is one option to use as a conversation starter. Lesson 3) Add fluff to a conversation so people can easily give a response.

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Went to the bar yesterday for just a couple of hours. (maybe three)

All the smalltalk advice is good and once you master this behavior you can do smalltalk for hours and hours.

Related to Lesson 3 it's important to give openings for the other person to let them contribute to the chat.

Let the other person lead a little and then back up what they say and that gives them some confidence. Once you know they have "broken the ice" and are relaxed and giving of themselves you will not encounter resistance unless you step onto something sacred to them.

In most cases the sacred is a myth.

So if you are getting near a sacred Blue Pill myth and the other person begins to panic as their reality is being challenged you need to be more subtle in how you approach it.

Often once you trigger their panic response you lost them.

I find it harder and harder to remind myself what the Blue Pill myths are and so it comes naturally for me to say some honest truth which breaks the sacred myths. But, it is probably better to "accidently" destroy a myth here and there in that it does benefit us all in the long run.

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Recap

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Last night there was a solidly Red Pill type guy who was easy to chat with, plus a bunch of regulars, one guy who was oscillating over whether he would date the female bartender (he stood her up on a date the day before) and a guy who had seven years of college and no degree but it was all paid by the parents so no student debt. This student had a "large" (girth?) girlfriend and it's likely she is attracted to his jerkboy spoiled kid lifestyle. When asked why he hadn't finished college he said:

"Heck, if I got my degree I might be forced to work... the party lifestyle would be over."

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Sounds like you've been reading Day Bang by Roosh V.

It's a great read, highly recommend it.

This is a great post. Unfortunately, my sticking point is that I never have any desire to actually "chat" with people like this. I'm usually the one trying to end the conversation and get away.

For women, I look for some way to pick on them. The rule of thumb I follow is, don't pick on anything that makes her feel good or bad about herself. If at the airport, I 'm walking next to an attractive woman and she trips a little but she makes a nice recovery. If we make eye contact, I'd say with a smirk, "Nice triple somersault back flip. If I was an Olympic judge, I'd give that a 4.6." She laughs, rapport built, start small talk. If I know she was a very clumsy person and she was conscientious about it, I wouldn't say that. Since I don't know her, I'm gambling she's not, so I'd say it.

Small talk is a lost art due to the rise of texting. Many, many times, plates have confessed that they dont know how to talk to anyone verbally anymore. The concepts of reciprocity, open/closed ended questions, follow - throughs, etc are all foreign concepts.

I do believe culture has an impact though - New yorkers are very easy to engage in conversation - they enjoy tit for tats. Torontonians are the worst - simply incompetent - have no idea of how conversations are supposed to have an ebb and flow. Londoners are a mix between torontonians and new yorkers - icy at first, but once they've warmed up - very jovial.

The other advantage to adding a little fluff to your cold opener is that it buys the girl a little time to process the fact that a stranger has addressed her. It's easy to spook someone when they're not prepared for an exchange. By talking for a little while you're giving her a chance to suss you out, turn down her flight/fight shields, and tune in to your vibe.

This is wonderful examples and awesome content, i've realize i haven't given the other most more to respond from what i've said to them, so this was a good read for me

Good insight here....nice tangible effective examples

Great guide; many thanks, OP!

Definitely looking forward to Part 2.

Great post! Focusing first on the environment or an object and adding fluff is a simple, tangible way to start small talk.

Environmental interactions with strangers aren't so bad.

How about entering conversation with people at a wedding/engagement/similar type of 'party' (as in not a house party, those are easy to talk to people too)

I read a comment here that helps explain openers well. Just let others into your inner dialogue.

It is important to notice that the art of small talk isn't just to initiate conversation with women that you want to game / sleep with. It is a useful tool to have for everyday interactions. It helps you to establish relationships which you can use throughout your job (building rapport with customers / clients) and the day to day activities (making new friends, etc).

Talking about the environment or commenting on a object near you is one option to use as a conversation starter.

Key point. Find common ground. Common ground makes the other participant in your small talk feel comfortable. Creates a platform where they also have something to contribute and let it evolve from small talk into a conversation.

Making statements is more effective than just asking questions.

Questions are answered and then the person moves on. Questions are used to retrieve information. This is useful in a situation where you have time at your disposal, let's say in club, or on a date but in a small talk scenario there isn't always time to do that. You want to establish rapport without sounding like an interrogator, that removes the spontaneity (and the fun element) from small talk.