Back in high school, I was your classic beta, completely head over heels for this girl, let's call her Elle. Her and her friends, the popular girls, all treated me with the stereotypical disgust behind my back.
Enter Sherry. I had asked her out in 7th grade, but got shot down then. Sherry was a really quiet girl. Never talked. I found out later that she had a really traditional set of Asian parents. To Sherry, for some reason, I was Alpha. I didn't interact much with her, so she only saw the impressive parts of me. Captain of two sports teams. Student Government official, top GPA, prom royalty, etc. Elle and her friends knew my beta personality, and they treated me like shit as a result. I never interacted enough with Sherry for her to know it.
Fast forward a few years, and I'm banging her in the car after our first date.
I find out how she's thought of me for years after a few more dates.
The one thing I don't understand is this: when I followed TRP advice at the beginning of the relationship, everything worked fine. So I began to experiment with beta behaviour. And it still works fine.
She hamsters everything I do as alpha. I spent ~$300 on her for Christmas. She later had the idea of blowing me in the showers at the public pool. She says that me smoking weed is "so badass".
I have a theory on why this is:
Her friends are all complete nerds. My skin crawls just talking to them. See, Sherry used to be a pretty ugly duckling. She's a lot better looking now, but the legacy of it is probably still imprinted in her mind. She still dresses really plainly, and doesn't wear makeup unless she's out with me. This isn't a party girl.
So by relation to everyone else she knows, I'm the alpha.
Anyone else have any similar experiences?
comefromaway2 11y ago
Sounds like you are the one hamstering.
scamper_22 11y ago
One aspect is obviously true. The social surroundings do matter. If her whole social circle is nerds... and you are just a little 'cooler' then yes, you will have a higher SMV to her. Also if she's just used to shy guys and you show a bit of initiative and power, its going to wow her.
Every woman is going to be wowed by some 'beta' behavior if you even want to call it that. Who doesn't want expensive gifts? the problem is does she expect it of you? Eventually, she might.
She probably sees it as her circle doesn't spend a lot... they're just too conservative and boring. Now you're cool and spend money on her, like in the movies or something. She could see that as a high SMV.
But as other have said. Be careful. Exceptions quickly become expectations. She is good now because she was humble before by being the ugly duckling.
pennypuptech 11y ago
Something is better than nothing... no?
Dragontitz 11y ago
that's why you go for shy nerdy/smart/artsy girls. Some are cute as hell and can easily be 7/10 (imo). I never found bimbo party girls that attractive. They're usually more annoying and they never have anything interesting to say