Yo chads what's going on,
I'm in college and there's about 20,000 other girls here. This is my experience with cold approaching and my transition out of bluepill onto redpill. For reference I am at a very prestigious university -- cannot say which one because I don't want to get ghosted but it is akin to Harvard or Stanford in prestige. Yes - most girls (and guys for that matter) are not attractive at all, but out of 20k girls (36k people total - our numbers in college are dropping) there are at least hundreds if not thousands of very attractive girls here.
About 2-3 months back I was staying lowkey, working on myself and achieving personal success. I would not talk to any girls and masturbated -- not to frequently, but maybe a few times a week. For reference I'm 21 and the last time I had sex was when I was 19 -- I used to be alpha and treat girls like shit, and they loved it. For reference I'm also from LA where whore culture runs rampant. I've changed a lot since then (for the better) and basically cut everyone off and focused on money. I ran it up to about $35k. Currently have no expenses no liabilities only income from a cash-flow producing asset, which is not that important what it is. So I was on some sigma male MGTOW shit for the last few years already. After college I'm going to live frugally until I accumulate a few hundred $k then go off on my own (what I'm going to do is not that important, perhaps for another post). Everyone talks about passive income but not everyone actually walks the walk. No, it's not that stupid dropshipping, Amazon FBA, or youtube shit. Basically it relies on being the smartest and only person in the world doing a certain thing and competing against others. More on that later. TL;DR was ignoring everyone and focusing on becoming a better man for the last 2 years.
Then I had a realization that I'm only in college once and might as well enjoy the experience. So I set my goal to talk to as many girls as possible. I got onto MGTOW after hitting up a girl I hooked up with 5x times about 2 years ago -- sending single text messages like "Wyd" and "Slide" and then getting head from her and basically allowing me to use her like a cum dumpster. She loved it. This time after 2 years, I hit her up differently. For context, after the 5th hookup or so I blocked her because she kept hitting me up and I had no more interest. This was back when I was on some alpha chad shit -- having seen hella whores/groupies at the rapper mansions I used to go to pretty much on a daily basis and having lots of girls eyeing me and chasing me pretty much everytime there was a girl in the studio. I met this girl at a studio for reference. I don't make music anymore because the industry is fake and there's no money in it. But it is true, girls love rockstars for some reason. Who knows why.
I apologized for blocking her and said I'd like to keep in touch for the future. Basically acted like a complete beta and texted her when I was in a completely different city for a few weeks, etc. Come back home for spring break and she makes plans then flakes on me 3 different times in a single day. I confront her over facetime and she says "you're acting really passive, making me not want to see you."
Keep in mind this girl is a whore. This was the first time my eyes were opened that whores love being treated like whores. Despite the fact that I felt bad for treating her like a disposable piece of garbage and wanted to treat her better (asking her to go on hike, date, etc.), she actually LIKED THAT. I'm like wtf. So this woke me up to the red pill game.
So now onto my transition. After coming back to college after spring break I made it a goal to get rejected by 10 girls in one week. I still remember my first cold approach. It was awkward and I got rejected. But I learned from that and kept getting better.
It took about 10 cold approaches to finally get a #. You improve after each cold approach, I swear to god. Even though I never got laid, I picked up the skill of flirting and seduction (my number rate improved over time drastically) which is a life long skill. I always used to be shy to talk to girls. Once you get to 20-30 cold approaches you become decent. I can only imagine what will happen once I hit 50 or even 100.
She solicited me to vote for some school candidate, asked her about herself (girls LOVE talking about themselves. Keep asking them questions like "whats your name, whats your major, what year are you etc. and if they're slightly interested they will ask back). I flirted with her, said her eyes were beautiful and then said "i'm gonna put my # in your phone, and you're gonna call me when free."
Ghosted for a week. Then I see her again doing the same shit at the main campus plaza and she acts all excited to see me. "Heyyy, how are you?" all that fake shit. I press her amusingly and be like what happened. She comes up with an excuse that she's been really busy with the elections. I then told her I thought she was using me for attention. I swear to god the look on her face was the classic guilty look and she looked away afraid to make eye contact. I also caught her lying about not seeing my text, because I let her know I'm also from LA over text (saw the area code) to which I was ghosted and she said "yeah I think we talked about that." Then I said "so you did see my text?" And she's like "wait....". Not the brightest girl by any means. She was blonde fyi.
Then I said you better text back this time (and she did). She hugs me all tight (SUPER tightly, i'm like wtf) and she's staring at my dick and hands and smiling. She texts back that day after I asked what part of LA she's from, she says calabasas and then asks me. I tell her and then the conversation ends again. Ghosted again. Tell if I'm wrong chads but if a girl shows interest, ghosts, then shows interest again and ghosts she has no interest. So I send her a picture of $20k all hundreds and block her after a week of ghosting. Next day she runs away from me when she sees me lmfao. Keep in mind I did try to call her / facetime friday night where any whore would pickup and fuck if she was into me. Used for validation. For reference this girl was like a solid 8 blonde with a good body.
That was just one story I wanted to share with you all. I have one more I'd like to share.
Saw this really pretty girl when I came out of the elevator of our clock tower. She was eyeing me and smiling. Gave the look, looked away, then looked back. Super into me. I was leaving and I'm just like "fuck it." Go back up after 5 minutes and tell her I came back up to tell her she's beautiful. She gets all giddy with her friend and starts saying how sweet that is, etc. Her eyes light up. I played this one pretty smooth bois. I swear after you get to 20 cold approaches you just level up. Ask her questions about herself (again they LOVE that), then she starts asking questions back and seems super interested. Say I have to be smart to be a stats major, acts really interested when I tell her I'm from Hollywood Hills, etc. (she's from long beach). Then I ask her wyd today, she's busy for finals. Then I look at her and say "wyd tonight" and she says studying. Then I say Friday wyd, and she says "yeah friday we can probably do something." I'm like cool so I get her #.
Then, after having the same thing happen to me 4 times in a row, I had to ask if she's gonna ghost me. She passionately says "No! You have MY number". I also tell her I'm not gonna text her first and I'll wait for her text. She says ok. This was Wednesday, texted her my name and shit so she knows who to text. Wait 2 days, nothing. Hit her up Friday night to see what's up and nothing again. I was genuinely shocked bois. I thought this one was a bag secured because I've never had a girl express so much interest during a cold approach. In fact, I've NEVER cold approached a girl that gave me the signs. They've all been random hot girls walking on campus.
Anyways I'm probably doing something wrong. My motto is don't learn how to get girls online or from anyone -- just do it. Every rejection is a personalized lecture just for you. The best way to learn something is to do it and fail. Every little thing you do wrong you are corrected for realtime. Read Robert Kiyosaki for more shit like this.
Stats
~30 cold approaches. 24 rejections 6 numbers 3 unconfirmed dates 1 confirmed date which I cancelled (she had a boyfriend and wanted to bring him)
I don't got time for all that game shit. Like I said, I'm pretty mature for my age and these girls are acting like highschoolers.
I would say the first 10 cold approaches and rejections are the hardest but then it gets easier. After about 1 month of NoFap you just gain the confidence to talk to every hot girl you see. 0 risk, only reward. Read Taleb and understand convexity. It's like a call option with $0 risk. Either you score a bad girl (worth like $500-1k to fuck if she was a hooker) or lose nothing. Now, I don't even wake up and say "i'm gonna talk to x girls." Don't do that. One way to gain confidence is to not make commitments to yourself that you know you can't uphold. It just happens. Once you've been on NoFap for enough time something in us as man just naturally propels us to talk to girls and it's EASY.
I would say I'm decently attractive. Been called handsome my whole life by a lot of people. For rating idk I'd give myself anywhere from a 7 to 8, if 5 is average. On a day like that where I get a hot girls number probably feel like a 9. I'm also in the music industry having been to Trippie Redd and Soulja Boy's houses to make music several times. Again I'm a sophomore in college and have $35k stacked up with a passive income stream.
So chads, why do girls love validation? Why would most girls reject upfront, but others give number then ghost?
I thought it was because I was "aiming too high". But the same shit happened with 5s and 6s. Straight up ghosted even though they act hella interested in person. I sweat to god girls in this generation act like they're Kylie Jenner. Online dating really turned the tables on us. But fuck it, I believe anything is possible.
Kept as second option? Busy? (can't be that busy, these girls are on their phone all day) I think they just love the validation.
mattyanon Admin 2y ago
The problem is that girls want at least 9/10 for casual sex.
this counts for nothing except your ego, and the fact that you keep mentioning your cash suggests an ego problem
because they love attention.
5's and 6's get a lot of attention because men aim for "the least attractive girl they would actually enjoy fucking", thinking that they'll be easier. The trap is that all guys do this, so 6-7's get a LOT of attention. A LOT.
Ok, so I'm hoping this will help you:
First understand what's going on. When you're in front of her you are the most exciting thing happening in the world. The next day she's forgotten 90% of the interaction, she no longer FEELS you, and now you're a guy texting her JUST LIKE THE OTHER 100 GUYS TEXTING HER.
But there is much you can do. I'll go through it:
Firstly be as attractive as possible. Muscles, clothes, haircut, low bodyfat, ALL of it. Aim to be 9/10, not "kinda handsome".
Secondly: take more advantage of being in front of her. Numbers are not commitments. Arrange a date straight away. "Hey, you're kinda fun... let's go and get coffee at this awesome little place round the corner". Failing that arrange a date.... "hey, you free Friday? we should hang out at this great little live music bar I know". After this it's natural to swap numbers. This avoids you thinking "number = date" and her thinking "number = attention". You arrange the date first, number as afterthought.
Also: more time with her helps. There are no save games. Aim for 20-30 minutes. If it's less than that she'll probably flake, EVEN IF ATTRACTED, because girls think extremely negatively.
You want the interaction to get past mutual attraction and towards mutual investment. You want to be a little bit challenging, you want to be the guy she's curious about, not the guy blowing up her phone. This means asking challenging (but fun) questions, deflecting some of her questions, not letting her have control over the interaction, maintaining high status throughout, being a bit elusive and looking like you might leave at any second so she invests in making the effort to keep your attention.
Get good at this shit and your flake rate will drop from 100% to 50%.
Hope that helps.
convexityofexpectations 2y ago
This is really good advice. The problem is I hate being around other people as of right now. Even in the beginning the reason my rejection rate was so high was because I would ask out a girl I met within 30 seconds. I realized the longer time I spend with her, the more likely I was to get her number. But being around other people - male or female - puts me on edge. I am pretty paranoid.
But, like all things, gradual exposure will help.
dongking 2y ago
You're probably giving out desperate vibes. i.e. when you asked if she's gonna ghost you (again). That's like the biggest attraction killer, if she feels other girls are rejecting you and you're on a mission to end a dryspell.
Care less, more dgaf. Also joke, neg, spark emotion when you intetact with girls irl. Now it sounds almost like an interview process and you're setting yourself up for being forgotten within 30min.
Can also recommend inviting em to something you're doing anyway. "I'm going to this awesome blabla on thursday. Meet me there at 7?" Then dgaf if she shows up or not.
Bozza 2y ago
There's a lot here so I'm only gonna touch on a few of the key points.
You bail after she flakes once. Maybe she gets a second chance if she can give a convincing story and she's sufficiently apologetic. You also broke frame HARD here by calling her out.
School boy error here. To be fair you handled it well, the "you're gonna call me" is a nice touch, but still a school boy error.
Problem is chicks will rarely, if ever, initiate contact with you. Even ones who are high interest. They're shy, don't wanna make the first move, forget about you - whatever. You have to take their number and initiate contact.
Edit: see mattys comment about organizing a date first. Number one priority should be agreeing a date. Numbers are not a goal in and of themselves. Girls will happily hand out their numbers - because once the conversation has moved away from face-to-face its much easier for her to reject or ghost.
She wasn't interested. I can see later on you're a bit confused as to why she flaked - this ones a very subtle detail so it's really easy to overlook.
Notice that when you asked her what she was doing tonight she just said "studying". Very short blunt answer. If she was interested then she would have offered another time. "I'm studying, but I'm free friday?" but she didn't. You had to prompt her for another time. Big red flag she's likely to flake.
In some situations this can be a shit test, or she's interested but she's not that interested yet and it just takes a little bit more game to break through. But 80% chance they flake.
I don't see a lot in this post about lifting. Lot of talk about money, passive income etc. But most important lesson of TRP is lift weights and get jacked.
Money is a provider signal. It's fucking useless. A jacked brokie will beat an average looking rich guy every single time.
Validation to women is what sex is to men.
convexityofexpectations 2y ago
Thanks for this. Makes a lot of sense. This explains why my success rate improved the more I talked to them.
The first hurdle was overcoming the automatic rejection instinct all girls have as a protective mechanism. I gave off creepy vibes by cold approaching and insta asking out. The more I talk to her, the more likely I can get her #.
The second hurdle is now to establish mutual interest. I lowkey made a mistake Wednesday. I cold approached this girl and asked if I could talk to her and walk with her to class. She asked how my day was going and what I was up to. I said I had no plans and walked with her all the way to class. I made her laugh, she kept asking me questions about myself. But for some reason I didn't feel like going to her class and kept talking to her. I just said "we can talk more later" after I got her number. I could have easily sat in her class for like an hour and established that mutual connection and even talked to her afterwards. Goes back to my disinterest of other people; I have a huge ego and there's no denying that. I'm also paranoid. It just takes a lot of work to be around other people, especially a girl who I barely know which is scanning/screening me and determining her perception of my worth. I don't give a fuck about other people and what they think so I shield myself from their opinions.
For some reason, I thought the job was done after getting a number. Matt's post about girls thinking very negatively sheds light onto this. She probably knew I just wasn't that into her and only wanted to use her body.
One thing I don't find that true about redpill is that girls will be down for casual sex right away. They want to make sure you're not going to hurt them. Maybe if I was jacked it would be different. I don't think any guy, no matter how attractive/jacked, can go up to a 9 or 10 and try to fuck within 5 minutes of meeting her UNLESS she is a whore.
Especially considering the fact that this is a prestigious university. There are very few whores here. Most women here have their head on their shoulders and are simply not interested in sex all the time all day -- especially when they are at school where their mindset is hard work. Girls that came to my school had to push off guys / being a whore in high school and instead focus on schoolwork. The exception is WHEN a girl is trying to get fucked, and in that case they'll go to a frat party.
I think in a frat party, it really matters if you're the best guy in the room. Outside, even if you're the most handsome guy she sees all day, she still has 100 other guys that can text her.
I'm not a degenerate alcoholic though and like you said my priority is on financial independence, not even getting girls. I don't really like to spend that much time chasing which again shines light on why I didn't keep talking to this girl that was interested. Most of the redpill chads that chase girls and lift are in these fraternities and simply don't got much going for them. It's like what they say - "college are the best 4 years of your life". Bullshit. If you do things well life will improve every year. The best time of your life might be in your 40s or 50s if you work hard in your 20s and 30s.
Bozza 2y ago
Sounds like you've got your head screwed on. It's nice to hear from people that are actually open to looking at their pitfalls and actively attempt to improve them, so hats off to you.
Sometimes you have to establish a little more rapport before you can arrange a date. With practice you'll be able to pick up on when you've built enough rapport to ask her out. You'll under shoot it and she'll flake, you'll over shoot it and she'll get bored - but eventually you'll hone it down.
They absolutely will. But ONLY IF your SMV is high enough, you have established a degree of comfort/rapport AND there is plausible deniability on her part. SMV is probably the most important factor.
I'm 6ft 2, blonde hair, blue eyes, decent face. But it wasn't until I got to 190 - 200lbs at 10% bodyfat that women would be open to casual sex with me right away. Prior to that it would take at least 1 or 2 dates.
Don't let the disguise fool you, they are whores. AWALT. Remember that.
The thing is there are social expectations in your environment. There are reputations to be upheld. So yeah, they will be cautious about sleeping around for fear of social stigma. But don't think that caution means they won't have casual sex. They 100% will, but only if they can be sure said social stigma won't bite them.
If they can trust that you're not going to go blabbing that she sucked your dick in the parking lot, and you can give her plausible deniability so she can hamster to her friends - then she will be much more open to it.
Partially it's just a number game. You vs 100s of other guys. But the higher your SMV is, the higher chance you have of her remembering and actively pursuing you.
Good stuff, focus on the mission over women. But just don't get too tied up on the mission either. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.
[deleted] 2y ago
[--removed--]