Intro
After reading The Forward Male by Mike Mehlman I got inspired. This seems to work like a charm:
Hi I'm X. I though you were cute and wanted to say hi.
Then converse for a few minutes and get their number.
Now I've been doing approaches on busy city corners during the day. It's pretty fun, and I've done something like ~50 in a few weekends.
Now I want to share stuff that comes up and ask some questions. My goal is to optimize this such that I can being as efficient as possible when on the streets, and get as many #/hr from hotties as possible.
Observations
First thing I noticed is that you need to be quick and actually filter out the majority of people on the street to find the ones that make sense to talk to (hot, same age range, no air pods, alone*). You will miss a lot of opportunities, but luckily there is an infinite supply.
Generally, there are situations that can occur:
A - Spot girl walking on different sidewalk.
OR
B - Spot girl walking your direction on same sidewalk.
Situation A
I've been handling by:
- Moving to a position behind them, walking the same direction at a faster pace.
- At an intersection we both stop and I start the convo.
The problems I encounter with this is that there is too much luck involved: sometimes it's straight green lights, no place to stop. And if you're "following" for more than two intersections, probably going to look like a stalker.
To get around this, I've just been coming up next to them more and conversing while walking. This feels like it has more potential for "get away from me" vibes though.
Right now like 90% of my approaches have been this street corner intersection conversation. Though, Mike himself say's the most attractive thing is being face-to-face with them, "you don't penetrate them sideways, why would you talk to them that way?" so maybe I should spend less time with this and more with...
Situation B
You can further split this up:
a. They look at you and give you a receptive response (extended eye contract, smile).
b. They look at you, but no receptive signs.
c. They don't look at you.
(b) and (c) seems to be surprisingly common in my area (I live in SE Asia). IMO has less to do with attractiveness and more to do with that fact that people rarely make eye contact here.
Regardless of (a), (b), or (c), your only option is this wild move of taking a U turn and walking with them to talk to them.
This has been a bit too bold for me to try yet, though there are definitely a few (a)'s which I regret not doing it on. My question is: when do you take the U turn, on only (a), (a) + (b), or all of the above?
Other questions:
- Do you actually check for receptivity (extended eye contract, smile) or just ask regardless?
- Walking while talking - do you just match their path until you get their number? Or do you try to get them to stop for a bit?
- These conversations can't last long due the nature of it -- they have somewhere they're headed. You're maybe getting a few sentences past "...wanted to say hi" and before "...we should continue chatting more, what's your number?"
- Maybe street corners / sidewalks aren't actually optimal -- do you prefer other places to do this sort of thing (e.g. park, mall, store)?
Any other advice would be greatly appreciated.
mattyanon Admin 1y ago
Ask regardless if you can: not all girls give IOIs, especially in strange situations.
Don't walk and talk. Get them to stop and commit at least a little. The number is an afterthought, not the main event....... "blah blah you seem cool, we should get tequila shots sometime" / "that sounds awesome" / "great, number". You're not going to get a solid close in 30 seconds of walk and talk.
Don't approach them from behind, this is creepy. Always front but not quite fully in front. Dominant, stopping her, but definitely not aggressive or pushy. It's a fine line.
Oh they CAN last long, she'll stop and chat if you're fun and high status / positive / interesting. Most of your game is about getting her to stop and invest. A passing number will flake 99% of the time. Build more than that. That's the game.
Ok, something is wrong and weird here. Why do you want numbers? Do you fuck these girls? Why aren't you trying to get laid?
Omni-Lab 1y ago
Can you explain, in detail, what physical maneuver you need to do to accomplish this in both A and B? Because right now, I have absolutely no idea how I'd get them to stop in their tracks like this.
Maybe I'm making the incorrect assumption that you collect numbers, some portion of them will not text back or flake, and it is what it is.
I've been banking on this day game pickup to be so bold (and therefor attractive / high status) that it doesn't really matter what I say or how well that convo goes past that point.
You seem to be indicating the impression you make at approach time is going to matter for these numbers -- this makes sense to me. I guess I should put more effort into seeming "fun".
Though I will say, in the environment I'm in, that might not be as easy as say the streets of New York or something. Nobody does this where I am at, and the women here have never had (or will ever again have) an encounter like this in their life. Even the on the approaches that went well, these women are in borderline shock and uncomfortable -- but do seem fine over text once they're able to think it through and realize what just happened.
Lastly, I don't think numbers or getting laid is the primary goal here. I am farming them for confidence by challenging myself to not be a bitch -- which is translatable to the rest of my life and career. Getting laid is a neat side effect.
mattyanon Admin 1y ago
Ok, this isn't my style at all, but here is how you do it:
Be 3/4 in front of them. NOT FULLY IN FRONT. They need to be able to keep walking, you are not physically stopping them.
Put your hand up in a "stop" motion, so that they will almost but not quite hit your hand off they keep walking.
Say "Stop a second" while smiling at them, in a voice loud enough to break through their bubble.
The trick is to be physically and verbally commanding while in no way making them feel scared or trapped or threatened.
Yes, but no point collecting 100 numbers and getting 100 flakes.
You should be trying to build connection, maintain attraction, build comfort and a few other things too.
Good!
even better!
Great, but do you meet and fuck them?
Great, but do you meet them? Will they meet you? Do you fuck them?
I can't see the point of just getting numbers..... anyone can do that, it means nothing unless you're getting something that you want out of it. Which maybe you are, but I think you are avoiding actually connecting with these girls.
Omni-Lab 1y ago
On the moves:
This goes for both scenarios?
For (A), I can maybe see this as you can walk slightly in front of them for a second, give them a look "oh I just noticed you", and do this.
For (B), I feel like they're just going to keep moving lanes to avoid you the second they notice a potential incoming collision, right?
Call me autistic, but the reason I've been comfortable doing this because I basically always start with the same opener "Hi I'm X. I though you were cute and wanted to say hi." which is so habitual I don't have to think about it anymore.
Yeah I know, openers are dumb as and crutch - but it feels like the sooner I can introduce myself and let them know why I am talking to them, the better.
Could I just skip this "Stop a second" part? Or would you modify this opener in some way to make it work?
mattyanon Admin 1y ago
Dude, I can't spoonfeed you the solution to every scenario.
Obviously if you're behind them MOVE UNTIL YOU ARE NOT.
This probably doesn't come across as genuine because it's scripted.
It has to be a command.
Omni-Lab 1y ago
Nothing else I say is scripted, but I think there is a lot of benefit to having the same consistent starter -- IMO not having to think about this part will make it so the rest of what you talk about is comfortable and genuine.
Maybe once I've done this 1000s of times that won't be the case, but it's where I am at, so need to go with that.
I just have no idea how to follow up. Maybe > "Stop I second... I just had to tell you how cute I think you are."
This is just bullshit 99% of the time, I'm not talking to 10's all of the time and I really didn't have to stop them.
Surely there is a way to combine the simple, upfront honesty of ""Hi I'm X. I though you were cute and wanted to say hi." while getting them to stop
Alright, but what about in the case that both of you are on the same sidewalk and walking opposite directions? This seems much harder to make her stop because it's just normal behavior to avoid a collision with a person.
mattyanon Admin 1y ago
Then you're already facing them.
Who cares about normal
whytehorse2021 1y ago
Basically London Day Game. You're supposed to get in front of them and stop them and then say you just HAD to tell her what beautiful X she's wearing or whatever.