Women have an expectation with alpha's that such guys are able to attract many women and so will do precisely that (and if she is lucky enough to get with an alpha that being one of many is the price to be paid).
But with beta's the expectation is that their resources will be entirely at her disposal. If a beta does something to make her jealous he is somehow reneging on his part of the contract as a provider for her by squandering his resources elsewhere. Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. The purpose of female jealousy is to prevent beta providers from becoming alpha's, to pin down a guy who might otherwise be able to build a harem.
As such, engaging with, placating or otherwise accommodating female jealousy is a shit-test and if you do it you fail.
EDIT: Thank you for the gold!
[deleted] 12y ago
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DevilishRogue 12y ago
You were just doing what you were told was the right thing. It's not your fault you were lied to about the right way to make a relationship work and you're not making those mistakes any more.
Thanks for posting this anecdote. I've been thinking about female jealousy and the purposes it serves for a long time but recently felt I still don't quite have a handle on it. But reading posts like yours really does help provide examples from outside my own experience that do solidify the understanding.
MarriedRP 12y ago
Feels good, don't it? Once you can get over the BP guilt, it's the only way to roll.
Invalidity 12y ago
A beta wouldn't have the potential to make a girl jealous. All she'd have to do is whine about how another guy isn't giving her attention or how or guys are assholes, and the chump will feed right into it. Females bait out that sense of "heroism" and "chivalry" in guys because they know it works so well.
WingTune0 12y ago
What's the best response for when a girl is whining about some other guys and trying to get attention from you?
TheSKSpecial 12y ago
Don't give her any. She's playing on your sympathy, hoping you'll give her attention to "prove" you're not like those other guys. But guess who's still on her mind? They are. Give her the attention she's whining for and you've slapped "Emotional Tampon" across your forehead.
RedPillDad 12y ago
Agree. A beta has low appeal, not enough to spike her competition anxiety. She might act up to defend a beta from a poacher, but it wouldn't be full-blown jealousy. That's reserved for an HV guy when he gets hit upon by a rival showing sexual intent.
DevilishRogue 12y ago
First off, a beta doesn't need to even "do" anything to make a woman jealous.
Also, what about attractive female colleagues, waitresses, relatives of friends, etc.?
Finally, beta and alpha are behaviors, not fixed states, and even the most beta guy can act alpha from time to time.
RedPillDad 12y ago
That whale is just nuts...
A woman can feel threatened by the beauty of other females just because they're beautiful, but jealousy arises when rivals start ogling at her piece of meat. A beta husband with good provider value might elicit some female interest. So sure, jealousy can happen. But if he raises his SMV substantially, the wife is sure to feel more dread. And like you said, she'll try to keep the guy pinned down.
mbillion 12y ago
I can confirm irrational women being pissed that the waitress is sexy.
laere 12y ago
Counter this by telling her: "Maybe they don't give you attention because you're a worthless bitch."
Boom
Invalidity 12y ago
Harsh and I like it, but it's not tactful enough for me. I'll call out people on their flaws but to insult someone, they'd have to have done something pretty serious to me.
laere 12y ago
Yeah, after I typed it out, I realized it would more of to counteract insults to take them off their high horse.
KyfhoMyoba 12y ago
If this is true, then how is it that dread game works so well, even when executed by 'betas'? Is it because the very act of dread is alpha?
Invalidity 12y ago
I'm thinking of a beta in terms of a male who has bought completely into the notion that treating a girl with "respect" and doing everything to please her will result in the guy getting a relationship with the girl he is swooning over.
This guy would be so far gone that dread game would have little to no effect. Guys that would even consider dread game, are on the verge of overcoming those misguided beliefs and typically closer to being able to effectively get a girl's attention. I wouldn't describe those guys as full on betas but rather beta tendencies.
KyfhoMyoba 12y ago
Well, that would be 'Blue Pill', not 'beta'. Beta is provisioning behavior. And dread only works on women that you are having/have had recently sex with, not, of course, on some ho you're orbiting. If you're postulating a married guy that's totally blue pill (like me 25 years ago), who might be very similar to the previous guy, only married, dread can work, if she still places value on the relationship. It won't if she doesn't.
Invalidity 12y ago
Please clarify on "provisioning behavior". I agree that dread game only works for people you have had sex with.
KyfhoMyoba 12y ago
Provisioning: supplying with resources, providing access to resources, expending resources on her or her children's behalf. A woman wants the alpha DNA first (hence 'alpha' or 'first' priority), after that, she finds someone to provide for her and her offspring. In hunter/gatherer times, an alpha man was probably also a good provisioner, as the most testosterone fueled guy was probably also a pretty good hunter. The woman prefers to have both alpha and beta in the same man. Since we've invented machines and computers, alpha and beta are usually in different guys. She still prefers the alpha, but will settle for (and settle with) the beta (at around age 28-30 - "look! up ahead! It's a WALL!). Hence the expression 'Alpha fucks, beta bucks (AFBB)'. Women's sexual strategy is of a dual nature.
KyfhoMyoba 12y ago
I think that there are some good points on both sides of the alpha/beta debate, and that this needs more thought. Definitely expectations set the tone, and are key. The question then becomes, how does the mans status (on the alpha/beta distribution) affect those expectations, and is there anything else besides expectations that impacts jealousy?
myhairsreddit 12y ago
Unless the man is a well known flirt, cheater, etc. Jealousy is just the silhouette of a woman's inner insecurity in not only the relationship, but with herself.