It was 2013, I had just graduated from high school. No real sense of direction in life, I had decided to work for a while until I figured things out. First job I landed was working at a Mexican restuarant (I'm a Mexican American) washing dishes and cooking food.
Work was tough, sometimes I'd work 12 hour days, day dreaming of all the things I could achieve if I got to work on them. Maybe I'd start classes at the local community college and see how things went? Within time, I became miserable at this job, getting home with beans and other food in my hair from washing dishes. Daydreaming, working, exhaused, I did this for a year with no clear goals. Maybe I'd become a waiter and make more money? Who knows.
Then I got to know one of my coworkers, Francisco. Francisco was upbeat, energetic, hard working, and very masculine. All around alpha male. He was an immigrant who'd only been in the US for 2 years but he spoke excellent English. For reference, my dad had been in the US for over 20 years and never learned as much as Francisco.
Francisco would switch between working as a waiter, line cook, food preparation, you name it and he was excellent at it. When he'd work in the kitchen, he'd tell me funny stories of his times with women and would give me, some pimply faced 18 year old kid, brotherly advice on life. I now reflect on some of the things that I admired of him and that made him an alpha male.
You see, when you grow up in this country, societal expectations can have a strong influence on your thoughts and beliefs that can lead to internal pressure to want to achieve. This pressure can create a lot of inner turmoil, keeping you distracted from the day to day tasks that are just as important as long term goals. The turmoil can become so great that you procrastinate or end up giving up on your long term goals all together.
But when you're an immigrant, you see things differently. I noticed Francisco had something my other co workers didn't: he was grateful. The other workers had a saying in spanish: "Asi es la vida, hay que trabajar, no hay de otra." (That's how life is, we need to work, there's no other option). Everyone looked down on the jobs they were working, with discontent at where they ended up. Some of the workers (many Americans) had been there for 20 years. While we were all miserable at our low positions in society, Francisco was bettering himself.
As many workers had the mindset of "I'm some miserable line cook at a dead end Mexican restaurant", he saw things differently. He'd say things like "If you're going to do something, do it well" or "Why are those guys always complaining? We don't have to work here, we get to work here." He didn't fret that he was at a dead end job; he was grateful for it. He owned that shit. He knew his place in society and worked hard to climb higher. Sure, he was a waiter, but he made sure he was the damn best waiter in the entire restaurant. I saw the guy go work on his GED and English classes after long shifts, happy to learn and improve his life. No pressure, he was grateful just to have the opportunity to be in this country. He was living his life with meaning and intention.
Many of you might be facing similar struggles, myself included. Maybe you're holding a temporary job while you search for something better in your life. You might feel like you need to do this or that, or wish you had more time and discipline. But I want to point out the biggest lesson I learned from all this: You don't have to do anything! Seriously. If you want to be a couch potato and play video games all day, you can! You don't need to show up for work tomorrow. You can stop working out, eating right, sleeping good. Are there consequences if you stop? You bet your ass there is. But the lesson still stands: you don't have to do anything. When I figured this out, that inner pressure went away.
So why bother doing anything? The answer is simple: meaning and intention. What is your meaning and what do you intend to do to get there? Is it to find a challenging and rewarding career? Achieve a physique you've never achieved before? Finish that college degree? What're you truely capable of?
TL;DR: Live your life with meaning and intention, even for the mundane everyday tasks. Be grateful you have another day to work towards your dreams and goals. Realize that you don't have to do anything; you get to.

uwey 6y ago
TLDR even further:
Do what you get in life fast and do it well.
Be a guy known for the speed and accuracy.
SpareVanilla 6y ago
Is speed and accuracy synonymous though? Why these two things? Not disagreeing
uwey 6y ago
Speed get you the placement of opportunities, and accuracy raise your credibility and trustworthiness.
Accuracy is probably more important, being fast is important to positioning but accuracy will get you there.
Boss is not idiot. You got to recognize the WHEN, for example, if there is a rumor of a position opening, would you wait on it? Or form up a plan, sit down with your boss, and secure the spot BEFORE someone box out? Often time when rumor is out, there is always someone that had a sponsor lock in the position. I have several job move like that, I am an outsider, and I notice who supposed to have my job due to seniority but I have better office politic intelligence.
Like Basketball, box out is a skill. Sometime you need promotion in order to keep your job, sometime you need to NOT take that job (and have luxury to do so) and let new guy take the fall. You must box out ahead or you will get cornered to make a forced move like chess. sometime able to see ahead is vital, by have enough time (your speed comes to play, the 10000 hrs) you not only able to use your own, but dine on others time (when they think and hesitate, you are on their time too but gain advantage due to experience) is vital. Speed give you that window of opportunity that don’t come often, like old saying: luck is residue of design.
We don’t have time to make mistakes, better use someone’s experience, or be the fall guy when there is a guinea pig job need “innovator” and somehow you get to do it (it happens a lot actually)
Team work not always make dream works. Don’t be the guy that bust ass and get forgotten while people are line up to bath in your glory.
kimsinrd 6y ago
Another point is, how you become fast and accurate!? I am in a similar situation and right now. I am overwhelmed to work 11 hours a day for not much money where I live, and in a fast food industry speed and accuracy is a must. Before I saw this post, I actually Googled "low energy levels in men". Its not like I haven't done it before, but I wonder if being fast and accurate while being energetic and in a nice mood is genetic, energy levels, or just habits/practice!? People suggest Zinc of testosterone which might help with energy levels. Any other suggestions?
uwey 6y ago
Be the best janitor you still a janitor, change your environment to gain positional vantage.
Don’t buy into “you got to work from bottom” bs people feed you. If you have a fast, reliable, and safe route to advance yourself, do it.
World reward you when you play it smartly even when everyone disagrees.
For example. Get a better industry that invest in you more than your current job is not a bad idea. You need to have at least few backup plan, going back to school is not a bad one if you don’t have a industry yet. Waste 10 year working in fast food and don’t become a owner is a waste of time. You also probably need to know how to promote yourself if you have not yet gets promotion.
Remember, your fate in later life pretty much sealed based what you did and who you know before you hit 40. It is hard(er) to switch industry, it is not impossible, but life obligations will keep taking away more your time; it will force you to take not ideal options.
Preparation is implied when you do focus on being fast and accurate. You can’t be as fast or as accurate if you are ill prepared. It actually can destroy you for unable to handle it, or worst, become a washout while wonder how others have done it. Of course no one would tell you how they prepare. Most successful guy probably prepared a whole bunch and appear to be effortless or even fate/god-given luck.
If you need reset in life and still young (under 30), you might need to do some major overhaul in order to get out the situation. Join a bigger club is not that bad, the pain will also be rewarded.
Like join military, move to new city/states, new industry like police/firefighters/federal to get more references, even a trade school from local community college. While you work low wage job, it can actually signal your ability to get scholarships. Stay 4.0 and maybe get into real STEM to become a engineer can also change your life. I tend to tell people get engineering/law/medicine but there are other industries need people too. Be a plumber, construction worker, or a mechanic is not that bad either.
Work hard because you going to need it.
rinse_and_rise 6y ago
As someone who used to feel "low energy", and unable to think quickly and clearly without drugs:
Quit porn, video games and bingeing on TV completely (1-2 hrs a day of TV is acceptable for me, none is better), they over-stimulate you and almost everything else in life will bore you if you use them. Remove added sugars from your diet, limit carbs, eat mostly meat and vegetables. Quit any daily addictions like marijuana, cigarettes, alcohol. (I occasionally allow myself to indulge in drugs if I know I can limit myself to one evening, but never marijuana, I cannot limit myself). Exercise daily (I'm down to 10-15% body fat from \~25%). Wake up and go to sleep at the same time everyday.
I suspect an unhealthy diet, high BF% and my addictions to hyper-stimulating activities like video games and porn were the main cause of "low energy" during day-to-day activities. Once I quit them new hobbies that I'm proud of replaced them, that might play a big part in feeling energetic, you are proud of your life, you have nothing to hide.
uwey 6y ago
Genetic effect is trivial. Making excuse is easy way out for most. No one can admit their own failures, it is always someone’s fault.
Changing/build new habits effect your neurons hence why it is painful.
By Charles Duhigg: The Power of Habit: Why We Do What We Do in Life and Business
odaklanan_insan 6y ago
When someone complains about not having what it takes (usually good genes or inner strength etc) I can't help but asking myslef if he's really getting the most out of his genes.
TheRedPillRipper 6y ago
”We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.” - Aristotle
What Francisco knew, as with Aristotle and those of us raised across two cultures is Perspective. Think Francisco’s happy in a restaurant if he grew up in the burbs?
The gratitude in his attitude means Francisco is not only bussing tables; he’s probably damn happy to do it too. That sort of energy is infectious. It’s attractive and people are drawn to you.
Indeed in life if it’s worth doing; it’s worth doing well.
Godspeed and good luck!
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mr_Tobbor 6y ago
I agree with that. But you have writen it down and I have read it, it doesn't mean I would/could do that. I just read it. Nothing more. Don't all you guys say do this do that etc. One thing is to say it. Another thing is to do it.
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Magicus1 6y ago
Also, I’d like to add: You never know who’s watching!
I left a fast food restaurant after high school graduation, joined the military, came back to see everyone and say hello.
A year later, roughly, I came back again to see everyone & everyone was happy to see me.
I asked about my old coworker and they said after seeing me in uniform, I convinced him to join.
I changed his life by chasing my own dreams.
TL;DR
Be a boss because you never know who might be inspired by watching you!
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DumA1024 6y ago
Doing this saved my ass last week friday. 25% of the company got laid off(Electrical construction). I just moved out, insurance went up, plus I got into a fight with a fellow employee a few weeks back...
Boss blatantly told me "you try to keep up with the fast guys, you're honest and you're still trying hard and aspiring, even after telling me you're trying to get into a new career."
anxietic 6y ago
Why do something? To find out what you're capable of. We discover ourselves through doing. Science says that alot of our dna, anciestral gifts and abilities are locked until a challenge wakes those dormant abilities you don't even know you have. That's one of the reasons why some of people love the challenge. Most unhappy people are those that are never challenged, have everything handed to them. They miss the opportunities to discover their own strength and power, feeling insecure and worthless.
throaway4000s 6y ago
I think you onto something. Even people on minimum wage jobs seem to be so much happier bringing home the dough to feed the family than rich people going to fancy restaurants all the time.
majcisen 6y ago
You know that not every rich guy had money or positions handed to him for free right?
therealsuH 6y ago
I'm glad you posted this.
"Whatever you do, do it well" I'm grateful that I grew up with a father who told me this ever since I was a child.
Even small tasks such as cleaning my toilet and rearranging my living room can leave me feeling great.
Completing tasks, work, and responsibilities without resentment but a positive attitude will kick start a healthy mental cycle that will allow you to achieve higher goals.
[deleted] 6y ago
This is a lifelong struggle. Even in like kindergarten I was messy as shit and would get sad and angry when I had to clean shit.
therealsuH 6y ago
Yes exactly, I work with kindergarteners and young children so I find it cute when they get frustrated or mad.
But, it's not so cute when a grown ass man gets mad cause he doesn't want to file his taxes.
Dandeeasalion 6y ago
I'm sure there are people on this sub that just straight up "don't believe in" ADHD, but it's definitely a thing. It shouldn't be used as an excuse to not achieve, but it does cause some problems if not addressed and we (or I, if you don't buy it) have to approach things differently, usually in some way that is unconventional.
acoltismypassport 6y ago
'Whatsoever thy hand findeth to do, do it with thy might; for there is no work, nor device, nor knowledge, nor wisdom, in the grave, whither thou goest.'
- Ecclesiastes 9:10, KJV
MrAnderzon 6y ago
14] I have seen all the works that are done under the sun; and, behold, all is vanity and vexation of spirit. [15] That which is crooked cannot be made straight: and that which is wanting cannot be numbered.
Ecclesiastes 1
acoltismypassport 6y ago
Ecclesiasticus, 'The Preacher.' Possibly one of my favourite OT books of the Bible.
ManthanDhabriya 6y ago
This strikes very close to home.
When you have that internal pressure, your everyday victories seem less than satisfactory and below par. You starve your soul of appreciation and grow even more discontent with your life.
californiawaves23 6y ago
Strong post, thanks for sharing. Still keep in touch with Francisco?
pigeon_exe 6y ago
Strong Francisco, thanks for sharing. Still keep in touch with post?
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brasilgringo 6y ago
I hired the girl who was our bank teller as our administrative assistant, because she was the only one in the bank who gave a damn about going the extra mile to help us. Now she has a way better gig, probalby makes 3x what she was making at the bank with better benefits to boot. All because she impressed me in her shitty job.
Vicco_ 6y ago
Do every act like it was your last
Kink3 6y ago
Absolutely if you're going to do things, do them well but also realize how debilitating the goal of perfection can be. You will make significantly more progress by hitting an 80-90% mark and moving on to the next goal.
californiawaves23 6y ago
Strong post, thanks for sharing. Still keep in touch with Francisco?
woehtovanquished 6y ago
Post strong , sharing for Thanks , touch Francisco still
californiawaves23 6y ago
Strong post, thanks for sharing. Still keep in touch with Francisco?
Korrangar 6y ago
You're really craving for that Francisco guy aren't you ?
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MrAnderzon 6y ago
We don’t have to work here, we get to work here
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doublecremeoreo 6y ago
So then I will do absolutely nothing but get high and scroll Reddit, well, and with meaning and attention.
Luca715 6y ago
Did you know the term alpha Male was coined by scientists when referring to canines and primates? There's no such thing as human alpha males.