I ran into a girl walking her dog on my way to work one morning. I thought she looked young and cute so I said good morning, her dog tried to bite me, I played it cool, invited her for coffee, and grabbed her number. She told me she won't be a good texter, and I replied that I don't have high expectations for her. I texted her that morning to say hi, and she texted me the same evening. Then she texted me again apologizing for seeming unexcited and told me that she really wanted to have coffee. I took this as a sign that she was really into me.
She blew me up over the weekend and I let her know that I was on vacation which she really liked. I tried to schedule a coffee date, and she couldn't make it. I tried froyo later in the week, and she canceled last minute. At that point I soft nexted w/out appearing butthurt (ok np, then no response), but she came back asking about my Thursday. I told her busy all day, let's get a drink later. She agreed, would love to get a drink.
I managed to pick a venue that she had worked at. She told me but I didn't change plans. I arrived and made friends with some students at the bar and some hosts. When she showed up, I knew I was unattracted to her. She was wearing a baggy sweater with baggy office-casual pants. Her face was 8/10, but I knew if she had a body she'd be showing it (not hiding it). She wasn't fat, but just the wrong combination of short and stocky that turns me off instantly. She looked better in a different outfit on the street.
That's ok, I wanted experience. She was such a motor mouth. She started telling me everything about her life. Her job, her deadlines, her boss, her family, her birthday, just everything about her. I could feel she was nervous. She told me she's 21 (I am 30). It was so easy, I had to pay attention not to talk too much because she was doing my job for me. She was agreeing with anything I said, even to the point of contradicting what she said herself one sentence earlier. I was doing some kino, touching her leg, sitting right next to her at the bar, touching her hair, etc. She responded pretty well to it, not touching me back though.
It was getting annoying with her knowing everybody at the bar, and also the two dudes I was talking up earlier (same University). The dudes did help me through a shit test, though, where she went to go "catch up" with some of the good looking guys who work there. I just started bullshitting with them and she rushed back to me. If I sat there on my phone waiting for her I do not think it would be so good. At this point I suggested a venue switch, but she told me she had to get home ASAP. I didn't give a fuck and got another beer, and she stayed with me for an extra half-hour past when she said she had to go. Then I told her I'd walk her home. She was telling me stories of how scary it is walking around with girls getting assaulted here and there, which put a very weird #MeToo vibe in my head. If I had any thoughts about working my way inside her house at that point, they were over.
I felt that she wasn't as interested in getting the drink as she was coming home with me. I felt a strong pull from, wanting me to make a move to come in, but the assault talk + I'm not really attracted fought against me. She ended up asking me for a hug, which I made fun of her for, but gave her a hug anyway. Then she was like "Well I guess I'll go inside now!" and I was like "Yup, nice night".
Kind of felt like I wasted my time, but this is also my first daygame date and my first "real casual" date ever. I think I could have got the hook up and gained valuable escalation experience, but I didn't want to fuck a sub par girl for the sake of fucking.
I was very surprised about how self-centered a 21 year old girl is, and how much she could just talk about herself. It was impressive how she could just keep yammering on and on about herself, her sorority, her job, her classes, etc, etc. I was also a little sad about possibly hurting her feelings, but I'm sure she can get 100 tinder matches in a day if she wants to.

CainPrice 6y ago
Thursday night after work is the ideal time for a fuck-date. Women typically reserve weekends for guys they're already sleeping with, but if things go well on a first date with a Thursday guy, they only have to muscle through Friday at work.
She made all of the right plays to indicate interest and was waiting for you to kiss her and go inside with her. If you'd felt like getting your rocks off with this one, all you needed to do was escalate more at nearly any point on the date and be kissing before she went inside.
If you didn't like her, you didn't like her, but unless a girl has something terribly wrong with her or you have a better girl you can text after a date, there's nothing wrong with taking an easy fuck when she's throwing it at you.
the_Milkweed 6y ago
I disagree, the pros and cons of sticking your dick in that just because of what? makes you more of a man? LUL not really.
I am proud of OP for holding such strong value over himself and his animal side. This is the type of man we should attribute as a red pilled man. Not someone who fucks because they can, how shallow.
CainPrice 6y ago
Sex is a normal human activity. If OP was horny, he did the adult action of meeting with a woman to meet his sexual needs.
Going without sex like some kind of weird monk or religious nut is a bizarre abnormality. Adults who have sexual needs take steps to meet their sexual needs. The inability to meet one's sexual needs makes a person less of an adult.
Sometimes when you're hungry, you cook yourself a delicious organic steak dinner. Other times, you just stop at McDonalds on the way home from work. A hook-up with an average girl from the internet or something similar is the McDonalds of sex. Sometimes, you just want to meet your needs without going to half a dozen farmer's markets to build your ideal meal.
the_Milkweed 6y ago
your implying that you need sex like you need food, this is where we will fundamentally disagree and the crux of our argument. I guess we look at things differently.
CainPrice 6y ago
I see it more like the ability to meet your sexual needs with another person is like being toilet trained. It's a necessary adult skill.
You won't die if you piss your pants all the time, but you're not really an adult. You lack a basic adult skill everyone else has.
the_Milkweed 6y ago
I understand and I still disagree.
TwentyEighteen 6y ago
Well no shit, OP knew that too, but he wasn’t attracted to her
ncstaterepted 6y ago
Cain, I'm revisiting the post today to learn more. Your insight about Thursday night, and girls dolling up VS just going right out after work hit me like a ton of bricks. I don't have that kind of wisdom yet as I haven't been dating for long at all. No pressure but that kind of wisdom would make a great top-level post, and I'm sure you have even more knowledge outside of just my situation.
Got me reconsidering a lot of shit in my life right there, but the past is the past.
SuperCrazy07 6y ago
I think OP misread her assault comment (she was probably implying she felt safe with OP), but I wasn’t there.
That would be the only reason I wouldn’t take it.
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CainPrice 6y ago
Honestly, this post sounds a bit like OP misread a lot of things, was a little timid about going for sex, and is backward-rationalizing why he didn't, claiming she wasn't that hot and talked too much and he didn't want to anyway, and tossing in that he was afraid of a rape accusation because MeToo women amirightguys.
ncstaterepted 6y ago
I was turned off as soon as I saw her. She was dressed like this but with boots: https://imgur.com/uyrcqs1
I was super horny. She also mentioned "I should mention that I've been wearing these pants since 8AM" which made me feel like she didn't shower after work or whatever. IDK maybe I'm prude. If you look in my post history, I had a ONS with the hottest girl I've ever had sex with and she stuck her finger in her pussy and asked me to taste her and I wanted to die on the spot. I got shit for that being very low on the kink scale, but that's just me.
I don't even care much about the face if the body is ON, but she was a bit too square around the hips to turn me on. I was wondering if I could secure the BJ and avoid sex because I honestly didn't want to take her clothes off and insult her by calling it off at THAT point. I had sex with a couple 2, 3 girls in college that were below my standard, just for the revenge sex on a cheating ex, and they always ended up getting hurt because I was not turned on
edit: I agree though that escalating is something I need to work on. I've usually never had to because in LTR's I just demand it and I'm really uncomfortable doing so considering the political climate, my career, etc
CainPrice 6y ago
She was definitely down to fuck, then.
A girl who doesn't take the time to go home, shower, primp her hair, put on fresh makeup, and dress up a little bit is a girl who's used to just meeting guys and fucking.
Girls who are putting in all of that effort for a first date are actually less likely to put out, because they're hoping it turns into a boyfriend instead of a casual encounter. I'm not saying it doesn't often go the casual route, but they're at least holding out a little bit for a real date.
A girl who just shows up on a Thursday night in whatever she was wearing to work and lets you walk her home is a girl who's all about the casual hook-up.
I'm not saying you had to hit that if you weren't into it - if I get a girl's pants off and she reeks from a long day at work, that's not very hot. But it sounds like you misread some of her signs as her not being interested, when this girl was literally signaling to you, screaming at the top of her signaling lungs, that she's a casual girl. What you were interpreting as lack of interest is just the usual casual girl being dead inside, picking up another dick because she's bored and wants to scratch the horny itch.
ncstaterepted 6y ago
I got ya Cain. I think you're looking at my line: "I felt that she wasn't as interested in getting the drink as she was coming home with me. "
What I meant here was, she didn't want to hang out and get some drinks, she wanted to get home ASAP so she could fuck and go to work in the AM. My bad because I wrote this thing stream of consciousness. And you're also right that I need to work on escalating, but IDK I felt like I'd be leading her on if I did
Thanks for feeding back to me
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temerity18 6y ago
Women seem to think they may make themselves look like a man. I then ask them what they would do if a guy they want to date showed up looking like a drag queen. They SAY they would be fine with it. Probably to save face. But they will think about it later and probably tone down the whole looking like a man thing.
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CainPrice 6y ago
There's an entire sticky-post on the front page.
HumanSockPuppet 6y ago
Good work. Most guys don't even go as far as getting a number from the girl in the park.
Next time, try a pressure flip. If she brings up MeToo shit, agree about the danger suggesting that, for all you know, she could be a serial killer trying to lure you back to her place so she can add you to her collection.
ncstaterepted 6y ago
Thanks, and I'll keep that in mind about the pressure flip. I've worked in the Ivy League (social justice league) for 5 long years and endured already so much #MeToo propaganda. I've learned to go dead inside and nod my head, making the concerned expression and maybe even a little "gasp". As a mandatory reporter, I've been exposed to the inner workings of the kangaroo court that is social justice @ the university level. I understand this is MY personal problem, but as soon as a woman starts talking about #MeToo shit I begin to detest her. I'm out of here once I get my STEM masters finished.
GodOfDinosaurs 6y ago
Yeah, you could have definitely smashed.
Way to get in some practice even when you knew you weren't interested in the close. Your best move was chatting up the guys at the venue when she was shit testing you. Good awareness and a bit of social proof.
Nice FR overall.
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balanced_views 6y ago
I think you needed to escalate more. 2 step forward, 1 step back.
Slight kino, invade her personal space. See her reaction, then advance. Keep it moving forward.
mexbesa 6y ago
8/10 face, not fat, interested in you and you didn't go for it? Man, you must have some really high expectations.
vas_mhtro 6y ago
First cold approach bro, you can't realize how good it's going because you have nothing to compare it to
PartyDucky 6y ago
If you ever date younger than 20, you'll see women who have literally nothing to offer but their looks. The Red Pill told me women are like children. Didn't believe it untill I saw it myself. Asked a girl that I currently date to go out on a more exciting date that requires a bit of planification. She told me she'll tell me if she can come. I told her not to forget since she did one time. Her reply was "is it my job to tell you if I can come or not?" Told her "nah, you don't have to come" so I went on the date with an older plate. Women avoid responsibility like hell. (I'm 19, so I'm naturally dating girls that are younger but at least 17yrs)
KristianSlayter 6y ago
Good call on the assault comment. Always trust your gut. I agree with some others here that you might have misread it. She probably meant she felt safe with you but when you get that feeling always trust it.
Nicolas0631 6y ago
They are young almost still a teen and theses are the worst from both sex. They often don't have yet any responsability their parent deal with anything serious for them and they didn't have time to see the consequence of having no drive in their life.
Still we shall not over generalize, it is also very dependant of the person.
sanos7 6y ago
Fair enough if you weren't that attracted. I get it. Been there. At the same time, by your own account, you're still putting in mileage. Sometimes, you might just want to do it for the experience and to break mental barriers. Good experience overall, you've taken away some lessons, savor them and on to the next one.
Cryptoguru777 6y ago
Some lessons to be learned here.
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cootershooter420 6y ago
you should have fucked her noob
the_Milkweed 6y ago
Stop being surprised they are like this, this is where human females are evolving towards. Never in the history of humanity have women had this much free validation and attention as they do now. The most basic bitch is allowed to hold thoughts and opinions she in no right deserves all because of a number beside a heart on her instagram. Dont feel about about hurting her feelings, they arent feelings, they are expectations and she shouldnt have them in the first place.