You CAN get frame back after you've lost it | TheRedPill

So I got her to my place, we are making out, everything's fine, until I try to go for more and she says no. I keep cool and try again after a few hours. Still no. We fall asleep.

Second day, I ask her if she wants to sleep again at my place - starting a bit to lose frame here by being too available - she says that she wants to, but that she's "not ready for sex yet." Here's where I completely lost frame, since what I understood was that she's a virgin and I never knew how to handle that shit. So I tell her that it's ok to sleep at my place anyway.

Here's where the story starts getting interesting: when she got to my place the second time, I instantly turned into a beta, back to being bluepilled, it was like I had forgotten everything I've learned because a virgin girl must be special. The first few hours we had some drinks and I was the only one pushing during that time, only to see her getting more and more cold and distant. I was completely into HER frame at this point.

Never, ever lose frame to a women/girl, no matter how special you think she is...

Here's where it gets even more interesting: after those few drinks, she casually mentions having sex with a guy a few weeks ago. This is where everything changed, I remembered AWALT and I started pulling really hard, being actually a bit tired and annoyed of that shit.

At the exact moment when I stopped giving a fuck about her, she actually forced herself back into my frame.

I started ignoring all of her requests afterwards since I was tired and a bit pissed off: Her: Can you fetch me a drink, please? -Me: You can do that yourself. Her: Can you play this song? -Me: No, I want to listen to something else, etc..

After a few more minutes of me pulling and her pushing, I went to sleep, just like that. You can guess what happened a few hours later when she woke me up by being all over me.

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Flintblood 8y ago

Dude I don’t know. A virgin being more concerned about choices over her body are completely understandable. I don’t know if you can frame that (no pun intended) in terms of ‘frame’. Frame isn’t simply restricted to getting your way all the time; it’s more about maintaining your self worth and integrity. It’s about not being obsequious and pandering after a woman puts you through shit tests. It’s about not letting amog attempts take you out of play. It’s about maintaining your cool too.

Virgins are special cases. It’s better not to put any real pressure on them. I know I’m going to get downvoted into oblivion for this and dissed for coming off as a blue pill white knight, but seriously, virgins are literally physically and psychologically different from women who have already been sleeping around.

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Ionvas2 8y ago

Please, just read the post again.

Flintblood 8y ago

You’re right. My bad for scanning too quickly on my phone while I was in the car about to go into to the mall.

morexel 8y ago

In 2018 virgins don't exist. These girls are born with an n count of at least three. They inherent one for every hundred their mother had.

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Jreamss 8y ago

Humorous yes, but devastatingly true

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DeontologicalSanders 8y ago

Men have incredible practical intelligence, but awful social intelligence. We, to some extent, intrinsically understand what makes a person valuable to society, but as a result, we suck at picking up on subtextual cues and latent meaning in the words of others. Objective value has nothing to do with hidden messages.

Women have incredible social intelligence, but are deaf, blind, and retarded when it comes to practical intelligence. They're fundamentally handicapped in determining what makes a person valuable or how to ascertain it, because they've never had to. They're born with nearly everything we want from them.

As a result, the only things they know how to evaluate are lagging and superficial indicators of how much value a man has (confidence, attitude, eye contact, decisiveness). They have zero eye for what actually makes him important. The reason they constantly want what they can't have is because nature has taught them not to rely on the ability to discern which men are important and which men aren't, and just to swim against the current because something good must be upstream. "If he isn't being nice to me, it must mean he doesn't have to because he is attractive and has options."

Ionvas2 8y ago

I agree, but I have a bit of a problem with:

They have zero eye for what actually makes him important

I know that the factors on the basis of which women find someone attractive or not aren't the most effective, but evolution got them into this kind of sexual selection for a reason. If you go back to the ages when the general characteristics of the human race were being selected by nature, confident, independent and strong (as in with a strong frame, but also a strong physique) males were statistically the ones who could've offered the most protection.

I think the main cause of this difference in the factors that define a quality person versus an attractive male for them is that they might consciously believe a man to be great, but if he doesn't fit the criteria of a quality caveman, then they cannot influence whatsoever their biological drives.

Edit: format

DeontologicalSanders 8y ago

You're onto something here, if not quite 100% correct.

One fundamentally weak assumption that TRP relies on (and that maybe you are relying on) is that the qualities that constitute AF and BB are static throughout all phases of a woman's life. It's simply not true. I turned 30 today and at this point have fucked and dated women from their late teens up into their early 40s. In my opinion, the most brilliant deception of all of femininity is that even as women age and their value declines, their standards for what AF and BB actually entail continue to go up regardless. You actually have to have more value to qualify for a now-depreciated asset. It's the ultimate form of presuming the sale.

The things that make a woman aroused and willing to fuck with reckless abandon at 19 (aka, a quality caveman) are so god damn easy to come by. Hit the gym a few days a week, spend a little time and get comfortable in social settings, and have a status-elevating hobby you're passionate about. Same with BB: be a good friend to her and don't be constantly broke and you fit most of their criteria.

Once they hit the late 20's/early 30's, all those expectations go through the roof. Every one night stand they have with reckless abandon represents time lost; there's a chance that this high-value man will fuck and chuck her again and she'll lose out on another opportunity, so the man in question has to be that much sexier if she's going to risk it. This guy must no longer be just hot and fun; he also has to be influential, powerful, and have a good professional and social network. The effect on BB is similar: this woman whose main priority was to live free and have fun at 19, now has other things on her mind. Financial security. Kids. Property. Ditching her shitty, unfulfilling career that nature didn't intend her to have. BB is no longer just paying for dates or having a nice place for her to hang out. It's about what you can provide, and how you can continually improve on that.

finclover9 8y ago

Good example of dread game and how not giving a fuck works. Girls love what they cannot have. Cheers mate.

Ionvas2 8y ago

Yup, the most astounding fact that I couldn't believe as it was happening was how dependant and how quick a girl's behaviour can change based on how (not) special you think she is. I also believe that if I tried only to fake the IDGAF/abundance mentality it wouldn't have had nearly the same effect as it had when I actually stopped giving a fuck.

Carcrash1985 8y ago

It’s not about faking the DGAF, it’s about ACTUALLY NOT giving a fuck , once you finally accept that AWALT and can not unsee what you have saw , this will show in your behaviour and you won’t be so awestruck by a woman’s beauty anymore.

finclover9 8y ago

You're right, it's very difficult to fake a state of mind since your non verbal will sell you out. That's why strong inner game is key.

Ionvas2 8y ago

This is how I'd sum up one of the main differences between PUA and TRP.

NightwingTRP Senior Endorsed 8y ago

You're not really getting frame back here. It's more that she's reevaluating because she's a useless fuck up. This won't happen with girls who are more sure of themselves or with girls who have solid options. It's useful knowledge for you.... though stop saying "please" to her. Seriously. Go look up my commanding101 post.

eyewant 8y ago

stop saying "please" to her.

Where did he say please? The girl was the one who asked with a please.

Bhunnah 8y ago

I’ve never experienced LMR with a really hot girl, they’re the ones to run around the house naked. 7s and 8s are sad attention whores but hotter girls cut straight through the bullshit.