Hey all, help me understand this event in my life starting with the behaviour of this HB9 (25y). First of all, I've had my fair share of experience with TRP and having moderate succes atm; 2 plates and a LTR that's ok with me having fun around. It just happend that recently I stumbled upon a case that doesn't make any sense for me. Long post inc. so beware.
So one week ago, while out partying with my ltr, I saw this HB9 I went out with about 6 or 7 years back. I called her name while she passed by me, but at first she completely ignored me although it was impossible not to hear and see me. 40 minutes later she comes to me and hugs me, looking kinda drunk and starts randomly kissing and touching me. I told her to chill a bit since I'm out with someone already and she just asks if we don't want to involve her into our sexual relationship. My ltr doesn't feel like it so I just replied that it's not possible atm but we can hang out some other time. She keeps on insisting, then, to have a threesome with a male friend of her (that she's living with ocasionally, but they're not into any kind of ltr)
Nothing happens and 3 days later I text her to meet up. She says she wants to, but she wants me to come to their place. I ask her to come to my place instead and she just ignores my message.
3 days later, we randomly meet in the same club and she's not as flirty anymore. She told me, without me asking, that she didn't want to reply since she felt like a whore (blahblah) when I called her to my place. We have a few drinks, then we decide to go to their place with a larger group of friends. There, she kisses a random dude right in front of me twice and, 20 minutes later, she comes to me and tells me how she never forgets our deep discussions and that I was important for her and these kind of weird stuff ( we barely went out two or three times). I just laugh and thank her, not taking it seriously. About 30 minutes later, she comes to me and says again the same stuff, how she remembers the time we spent together. We just have some fun there but nothing else happens that night, so in the morning I just went home.
3 days later I just message her what's up, but this time I get completely ghosted again.
Wtf did just happened in my life lol. I don't really care about her specifically, but nothing like this ever happened to me. I'm not trying rn to 'win her over' at all, I'm just trying to make sense of these events. Thoughts?
whytehorse2021 1y ago
It sounds like she wants to get double-plugged by 2 dudes at the same time when her husband is away. She has to do this at the house where she is having an affair with another guy. She can't answer calls or text when hubby is around. She doesn't have a plausible lie to give her hubby for why she is going over to your house.
Arcturus 1y ago
When you went out with her in the past who ended it? If it was you, she's probably just seeing if she can get you interested enough that it'll hurt if she walks away. Kissing other dudes in front of you after engaging also seems like a ploy to induce jealousy. I wouldn't let her close to anything you actually care about. You could easily fuck her by consistently remaining the least interested party, but with someone coming from a potentially vindictive place, you should very seriously consider whether it is worth the risk, especially since you have other options.
ionvas2 1y ago
She was the one who ended end after having a fight with my gf at the time (different one). I don't see why she'd be vindictve, seems to me like she's having a weird fun (in her mind) game. I don't understand at all the complete ghosting twice, compared to her full interest when we met (both times). I mean I might've replied in a rude way when she said she thought we had sth special, but it just seemed to me like something so out of place that it must be a joke or a game of her.
Arcturus 1y ago
What was that fight about?
ionvas2 1y ago
Well, my gf found out I was going out with her and confronted her yikes
Arcturus 1y ago
“I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”
When that confrontation occurred you stayed with your girlfriend at the time. HB9 lost and she will never forget how that made her feel. Vindictive might have been too strong a word, but she was definitely trying hard to flip the script and control the situation this time around. Of course we know failing to fall for that is attractive, so chances are she's got quite a swirl of strong emotions, both positive and negative, regarding you. Shouldn't be hard to get her into bed with that going on, just wait for her to reach out again or hit her up out of the blue in 2 or 3 weeks.
ionvas2 1y ago
Thanks for the reply. It makes sense, but the problem is she's only on vacation in my city (she moved abroad) and she's gone in two or three days. I'd try calling her today since I've nothing to lose tbh and who knows when she's gonna be around again. But I feel awkward af calling her after being ghosted by messages tho.
Arcturus 1y ago
Yeah, don't call. Is where you live your hometown or where you went to school? She won't forget you. If you're both in the same place again she'll probably reach out. If not, well, no big deal right?
ionvas2 1y ago
Sure. She texted me eventually and said that she'll be in town for one more week and that she'll let me know when she can meet lol. Ofc I told her that I might not be available on any given day so she'll have to let me know in advance so we can schedule something. However, my best bet is that she'll continue the game and won't text me yet again for a meet-up. But, as you said, no big deal.
wswZtyqNGQ 1y ago
This is the answer. Hot women win at everything by default. When they fail they are stunned and can't ever stop obsessing about it.
ionvas2 1y ago
I mean she didn't REALLY lose, since she was the one who ghosted me in the first place (a few years back) right after my gf confronted her. So I didn't really get the chance to chose between them.
wswZtyqNGQ 1y ago
You were unfinished business. That's the same as a loss to someone who always wins.
ionvas2 1y ago
I mean kind of, I feel like she just wants to 'win' out of this encounter by making me the one that chases her so she can ghost me and feel like a winner lmao
[deleted] 1y ago
[--removed--]
ionvas2 1y ago
I mean, sure, pragmatically that's the best way to approach it, but I kinda loved her games and drama, I felt like I was 20 again lol.
HopelessRomantic 1y ago
"3 days later I just message her what's up, but this time I get completely ghosted again.
Wtf did just happened in my life lol. I don't really care about her specifically, but nothing like this ever happened to me. I'm not trying rn to 'win her over' at all, I'm just trying to make sense of these events. Thoughts?"
No, you passed the shit test. She wanted to make you jealous by kissing the guy in front of you and you did what any normal person would do - moved on. When she started saying weird stuff after she kissed the guy in front of you and just laughed it off and didn't take it seriously, she realized at that point that she can't manipulate you and do what she wants with you. So no offense to you, but to her - you're now boring. It's good that you didn't bite on the bait and stood your ground, that's a step in the right direction. Keep spinning your plates, it seems like this one might be a done deal, but just understand, she wants to use the one that gives her the most attention.
ionvas2 1y ago
Honestly this is as close to my interpretation that it gets. However I thought she would feel intrigued instead of bored. I kinda liked her stupid games tho, they brought some adventure into my life lmao.
Honestly I'd try calling her just to see what she tries next. She'll be out of town in two days (she's in my town just on vacation) so tbh I don't care if this goes wrong.
HopelessRomantic 1y ago
As long as you recognize it and can play the game with her while knowing when to pull back - hats off to you bud
ionvas2 1y ago
I think it's pretty obvious that it's a game on both sides and that makes it super fun for me. What did you make of the part where she completely ignored me when she first met me in the club and I called her name, while being obvious that she heard and saw me; and then coming back into hugging and kissing me 30-40 mins later? I feel like if I understand that party, I'd understand her whole game tbh. Thanks for the replies btw.
HopelessRomantic 1y ago
Just playing hard to get. Girls know guys want them. By playing that game they make the chase more exhilarating - at least for you. The chase makes her feel like she’s being hunted. Women secretly get off on fear, makes them horny. It’s biology. Where you’re hunting her, she also put a tag on you for being her savior as well - therefore initiating future sexual interaction by means of affection and adoration.
ionvas2 1y ago
I mean dude, sure, but she came 30 minutes later and basically threw herself at me, without me doing literally anything, so it kind of does not apply here tbh
HopelessRomantic 1y ago
Yeah - because she realized that you wouldn’t chase her when you said something and she ignored you. So now she’s all bothered you didn’t follow up - is my interpretation. Bitches love attention, and when they don’t get it they throw themselves at anyone who will give it to them.
ionvas2 1y ago
Update, as I've mentioned somewhere else in this post: She texted me eventually and said that she'll be in town for one more week and that she'll let me know when she can meet lol. Ofc I told her that I might not be available on any given day so she'll have to let me know in advance so we can schedule something. However, my best bet is that she'll continue the game and won't text me yet again for a meet-up
HopelessRomantic 1y ago
Very likely. Just don't respond. This shit is childs play, she'll end up talking and texting you back and forth, building some sort of chemistry with things like, "I can't wait to see you" and "I really want to hang out" blah blah blah. The, of course, on the day of you two meeting she'll blow you off, ghost you, and then try to justify it with some b.s excuse.
Lionsmane8 1y ago
This has "CRAZY" written all over it. Eject soldier eject!
ionvas2 1y ago
I knoooow man but this kinda makes it fun. I've went out with a decent amount of normal chicks and this is interesting af.
Lionsmane8 1y ago
Great, now go scratch that itch, then regret it, then write a long post about it so we can learn at your expense.
ionvas2 1y ago
I mean I might just do that lol. What's the worst that can happen?
Lone_Ranger 1 1y ago
the worst that can happen???
Oh boy.
Lionsmane8 1y ago
Go be a cannon fodder! we will take notes and cheer you on from the comfort of the sidelines!
ionvas2 1y ago
I posted an update one hour ago btw
ionvas2 1y ago
I might do just that since she texted me again.
Lone_Ranger 1 1y ago
Lionsmane is correct. Shes crazy. All women are crazy but hot women are super crazy. (Lets be honest.... it's our fault, men have caused her insanity through pumping and dumping them. )
Avoid this drama queen. She will try to drag you into her fame.
Lionsmane8 1y ago
Don't excuse the ladies brother. They are complicit in the pumping, and responsible for the dumping.
Lone_Ranger 1 1y ago
I hear you Lionsman8 - but I do sometimes wonder about the double standards in the TRP community. Men do a lot of pumping and dumping and this is eventually what turns them into leftovers and damaged goods. I know what you are saying, that it takes two to tango ,and i agree with you.
Lionsmane8 1y ago
My initial policy is usually pump and keep. If they get dumped it's 99.9% their fault.
Lone_Ranger 1 1y ago
amen. I have usually kept to that formular myself.