In my last post, Become Dangerous, u/kiwifx commented asking about discipline in a military prospective. This is my response to you.
Surprisingly, I am very quiet when it comes to talking to people about the military. I don't like talking about it in real life because of social anxiety. I may have made a name for myself, but this is something I truly did because I wanted to. I went from being the little weird kid to becoming something else. I haven't completed my metamorphosis yet, and I can only imagine what the future holds.
Discipline is a very important aspect of the military. Quite frankly, I can't imagine another thing in the world that would take the same amount of effort. However, this is not a good life example. Most people will never attempt such challenges in a regular life time. I don't mean to neg or sound edgy: but serving in the military is an experience like non-other. I would never compare a normal life to mine; they are two completely different beasts.
The Basics
The problem with discipline is that people have the wrong idea about it. It's not about doing hard things, or working out to get ripped, or approaching girls to get better game. Discipline is doing things you *willingly don't want to do**. That is the basics of it. Can you go to the gym and lift weights? Of course you can! But do you want to? Meh. Can I go out and say hi to that cute blonde. Fuck yeah, I could*. But do I want to? No, I'm too nervous. As you begin doing, your tolerance of things "willingly not do" will go up. I hated squatting when I started working out. Now, I love squats. But I don't like cardio, etc.
Ask yourself, are you really comfortable doing any of this?
Do you really enjoy having to work long hours to save up money, or working out when you're just so done with life? Do you really think I enjoy doing these crazy Army things, like being sleep deprived for days at a time, not showering for more than a week, and eating food out of a bag? But, why did you do it? Did you do it for pussy, to get a big pick up truck, or for some reason deep down inside of you?
Quitting
There can be many reasons why people just chose to quit. Some people just straight up don't want to do anything. It's too much effort, they hamster away excuses, etc. There's no reason for me to try and convince these people to persevere. You can't help someone who doesn't want to be helped.
But, there is another reason why people quit. And these are people who are actually putting in the effort, who are actually fighting and trying to do something. They quit because they let their mind get control of them. They look at other people and think, "Man, they make it look so easy. Maybe I'm not cut out for this. This is how I felt during the entirety of my military training. I wasn't the fittest, and I was a bit shorter than most of the colleagues (5 ft 7). This made a terrible combination for ruck marches, where we were humping 40+ lbs of gear. I looked around me, and no one else was heaving air as much as I was. I was starting to slow down, eventually people started passing me because they couldn't work as a fucking team and let the slowest people lead (proper practice for ruck marching. I'm still salty about it). And I thought to myself, "Fuck, these people are doing it so easily... maybe I'm not cut out for the Army after all." It wasn't until later on that I finally realized that no one had it easy. Everyone else cried, wheeped, puked and sweat just like I did.
I wasn't the problem - the challenge was. And since then, my outlook on life changed. I stopped myself as a problem, and realized that challenges were challenges for everyone, not just me. It sounds ridiculous, doesn't it? People quit just because they feel like they can't achieve. The human mind is the most powerful tool, yet the greatest burden we will ever have. You are fighting against yourself, and you very well know you are. Once you realize this, you won't ever be satisfied again. I always want to lift more, run more, talk more. It is a very dangerous thing to have full control of yourself, which is the very reason why I wrote the previous post.
You need to master the basics in order to cultivate strong discipline
To answer your question u/kiwifx, the best way to building discipline is to master the basics. You need to understand that you are going to do something you willingly do not want do. It is literally your mind against itself. You need to have that sort of power in yourself to say "fuck you" and do what you consciously want to do. It won't necessarily feel good, but nothing in regards to discipline "just happens" or is a subconscious decision. Where you get that power is up to you to discover.
I hope everyone who read this can take something away from it. It really is a joy to share knowledge with like minded people.
[deleted]
[deleted]
Rising_Shadows 5y ago
i noticed the same thing when i started lifting. in my mind it was like: there's positive and negative fun.
positive fun is everything that grants instant gratification. it is the other side of the coin and needed from time to time to reduce stress levels
negative fun is something that is bothersome or unpleasant to do but will help you achieve your longterm goals. hence why it's negative in the present moment but still fun because you reap a reward eventually
EdmondDaunts 5y ago
The best example of doing something you don’t particularly like in lifting is the Press. It’s a difficult one to master and progress. And in numbers terms it’s the least poundage lift.
But when you practice and practice and you Press a big weight overhead. Priceless.
Terdmuffin 5y ago
Protip: if you want your OHP to progress like other lifts then prioritize it like other lifts. A lot of people only train Ohp after they blow themselves out on bench.
[deleted] 5y ago
[deleted]
[deleted]
Red_Faust 5y ago
it's literally two minds colliding. your rational self has a sense of the future, while your primal mind cannot project itself to the future, and only understands "now"
(as a side note, you can see how overfocusing on how you "feel now" is a childish/feminine trait. in fact, the marshmallow experiment showed up that kids with greater delayed gratification ended up doing better later in life)
in order to avoid procrastination you have to make it hard, way harder for your monkey brain to run its course, and to make it easy, way easier for your rational brain to get his way.
you have many ways to achieve this: by habit creation, self-incentives for discipline and self-punishment for procrastination, rituals to get you into proper physical and emotional state, visualizations and so on.
for me the best trick was to subdivide the task in front of me in small sub-steps, with the goal of making the first 3 step as simple and basic as I could. for instance, if I had to write an email and I found myself procrastinating I'd do this subtasks list:
1 - open gmail
2 - find email to reply to
3 - write "Hello [NAME]"
as you can see, writing this subtasks checklist takes more time than doing it. it's on purpose. I end up with a list so stupidly basic and simple that anyone would be ashamed of not doing it.
then, after the first steps are done, inertia takes over and I can go on focused and keep working till I end the task.
[deleted]
Cultist_of_Mars 5y ago
I don't have much interest in girls but this sub is a goldmine of sage advice.
Hyper_Sonik 5y ago
Discipline is simply being consistant in your actions and beliefs. One area where people get it wrong is parenting. Many parents confuse discipline with punishment. Punishment should be the consequence for lack of discipline.
Lack of discipline is telling your child it's okay to have a chocolate bar once in a while when you've raised him to consume NO junk food at all. Best way I can put it. Discipline is absolute. I cringe when I hear an adult say you need.to "discipline" your child.....
Ciaccoo 5y ago
Parents need to punish their children so the child learns discipline. (Finish your homework or no dessert)
The parents also need discipline (doing something they don't want to do, i.e. punishing) to teach the child.
No parental discipline = undisciplined younger generation.
Pragmaticpandas 5y ago
Easy choices, hard life. Hard choices, easy life.
BaronIncognito 5y ago
That’s great, never heard it before.
CaciqueBoss 5y ago
this pretty solid and good advice.
[deleted] 5y ago
Habits and dopamine reward motivation.
BurnoutRS 5y ago
When you get up in the morning and think "oh man I just wanna lay in bed all day" and then that voice in your head says "fuck that, you got shit to do bitch"
thats discipline
studentsensei 5y ago
I can relate. I was in the Navy and I hated running. I wanted to get better but running sucked. And you're right, people who are good at it make it look so easy.
Then one day I ran with this older Chief. He was about 38 years old. As we ran further and further and I fell more and more behind he looked back and screamed
"I've had surgery on both of my knees, several ankle sprains, and my cartilage is almost gone. There is no way your young ass is in more pain than me right now."
That flipped a switch in me.
Everyone feels the pain, but they push through it. Bottom line.
JustReadBrah 5y ago
It is indeed “a joy to share knowledge with like minded people” I cannot stress that enough myself. I struggle to find red pilled people to discuss these topics with and share progress with like bros. My current long term friends are so blue pilled mostly and the ones who aren’t are just like “fuck it” all the time and are happy with a pussy or two a month and don’t want to improve on it.
I will put this rant to rest for now and maybe someday I will post something in regards to this rant that I think many might be able to relate to.
For now, good stuff as always and “Become Dangerous” was a great post as well.