Background:
I've been lurking in TRP for a quite a while now. Swallowing the red pill wasn't difficult given that I was always a skeptic of the feminist agenda even as a blue-pilled teen. I supposed my awakening came from finding the YouTube MGTOW community a couple years ago ,which did the job of putting logic and shedding more lights into my suspicions. Naturally, I discovered this subreddit. Most of the concept and theory here are practical and resounded strongly within me. My main problem was that I would only mentally apply the lessons learned from over hundreds of posts, good and bad. Like some here are afraid to admit, my main problem was that I thought theory was all I needed in order to improve my relations(success) with the opposite sex. Of course, I was wrong.
Body:
Recently, I've challenged myself and want to achieve three things. I want to rid my life of porn, progress further in the gym, and eradicate my approach anxiety. I've been on pace to fully accomplish the first two as I've incorporated a consistent workout routine that is compatible with my schedule and have abstained from porn for several days(small victories help win the big war). As for the latter, at the gym tonight, I approached two women( an HB5 and an HBinvisible) initially to ask for a pair of 10lbs weights where the HB5, with a smirk,playfully denies me. I laugh at her denial and proceeded to do what I wanted. I took that banter as a sign of attraction(Always Assume Attraction) and said fuck it and made the "cold" approach. Conversation starts off OK but quickly stagnant when I came down with anxiety and simply couldn't get out of my own head and kept stalling so I did not have to ask for her number in order to secure some sort of meetup. Eventually, she and HB moved on to a different exercise in the deeper part of the gym and left me alone to my thoughts. So in hindsight, I could have easily relaxed and approach at a later time, but I didn't because I was in my own head from failing to apply TRP in real life situations. Now most of you are familiar with successful FRs, but in this one, I took the L.
Lesson:
I hate to reiterate what some excellent posts in the last few days have stated, but I feel like I must. You can understand frame, social hierarchy, the benefits of strong eye contact, and etc., but you will still FAIL because you do not exude out that knowledge as a result of remaining that overanxious dude that never matured from lack of experience. During that extended period where I'd learned TRP and not directly apply it to my life, I was still stuck in the anger phase because I refused to take action and eventually learn and grow from it. A woman rejected me? I would internally lash out and rationalize that she's just another hypergamous whore(Whores are not always a bad thing) instead of critically evaluating myself and come to the logical conclusion that my approach was trash. If you are lashing out like a brat, how do you expect to maintain frame when confronted with rejections and setbacks that comes with the process of gaming women?As a result of throwing myself in the fire, I was able to learn something about myself and improve my approach in the future.
TLDR; Red pill theory resonates with long time lurker, but he fails to apply it to his regular life preventing him from growing and leaving the anger phase.
TLDR; Don't simply learn TRP theory and concepts. Apply it. Live it. Become it.
Alpha_Jedi 5y ago
The only way to truly learn how something works for you is to go out and do it for yourself. A good RP quote from the Bible is "For as the body without the spirit is dead, so faith without works is dead also." The theory is great to have, but it's utterly useless unless you put it into practice for yourself. Cheers.
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DadOnDabs 5y ago
I'd avoid continuing to approach at the gym, one or two here or there casually isn't bad but you don't want to become "that guy".
7GreatOne11 5y ago
Yeah. Don't shit where you eat.
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[deleted] 5y ago
Its a gym, youll probably see her again.... Judt say oh hey you that weight hoarder who didnt want to share ..blah blah ... Whats ur name.... Since its a place u WILL see her again just chill and incorporate that into your game.
Also dont be afraid to say stupid shit, as long as younown it they wont think ubare weird.
gbdoragnic 5y ago
First off wonderful post, in fact you inspired me to try being more open and connecting with people, the gym is hard mode, your setting the game difficulty to 10, you can dial it back to 3 and hit up tinder , but going in on hard mode will create the best results if you win that is. Just be careful.
> I approached two women( an HB5 and an HBinvisible) initially to ask for a pair of 10lbs weights where the HB5, with a smirk,playfully denies me.
I had this same issue, when I was younger I asked for a box of condoms, the women just smirked and laughed at me , I mean I asked so scared and like a loser but deep down I knew I was a winner, so I didn't waste my time and went and found someone else, that next women was so kind, so polite, she was so helpful, she bent over backwards to help me. Some people will think they are too good for you, this isn't a attack on women , this isn't calling them a whore for not liking you, you asked for the weight and she smirked, I dunno man I wasn't there, but don't sale yourself short and don't connect with people who aren't willing to meet you half way, your better than that, The reason I never got anger at the first girl was because she wasn't worthy of my anger, I didn't think she was a whore or hypergamous ,I just thought hmm what stick is up her butt, and found someone else.
I do feel I have some wisdom to share with you
> I want to rid my life of porn,
This is ego, and you are growing though ego instead of experiences, let me explain, I don't watch porn because it is boring, I move on to casual sex, after that became boring I moved on to relationships with women. Porn and casual sex is boring to me because I grew not though ego but out of boredom
When I first started dating I wanted to show women the real me, I put Bible Black on girls on the first date, I was shocked to hear they already seen it, but they were interested in me. I connected with women though porn . Your really doing yourself a disservice by following a script that isn't you. If you have to fight it , it isn't you.
> A woman rejected me? I would internally lash out and rationalize that she's just another hypergamous whore(Whores are not always a bad thing) instead of critically evaluating myself and come to the logical conclusion that my approach was trash.
Than you were a genuine loser , Do you really want to own that? I never got mad I always blamed myself for my issues, that is what lead me to PUA, I was doing something wrong, I never got angry , I think those who are in the anger phase don't think they are worthy of love at their current state so they always seek to improve, than they feel they can find love at a level brought up by their ego. Look man I think you were really mad at yourself and frustrated with you, not with her, I don't think you love yourself, and that is where the negative energy is coming from
BostonPillParty 5y ago
“Just do it”
Good job man. Keep executing....