Introduction This shit isn't that hard. I'm going to introduce to you guys my test method for tinder, bumble, or whatever the fuck you use. This post will make text game a little easier for you and is a lot simpler than other guides. May I introduce to you The 6 Message Rule.
Body So what is the 6 message rule? It's exactly what it sounds like. You have 6 messages to build rapport and flirt a little before getting the number. The goal of tinder is to set up a date or get a number. So why 6? I try to keep my tinder interactions from stretching 2 or 3 days of messaging. If this happens due to her not replying she isn't interested (next). 6 messages is also just enough to spark her interest and get her comfortable with you while still leaving mystery. More messages and she will want to know more about you (which is better left for a date).
People over complicate this shit way too much. Before sending any message to a woman in general ask yourself two questions. What is the response I expect? What would Chad do? (WWCD applies to everything RP not just text game. Try it out in other areas as well). The first message you send a woman on tinder should be something related to her photos or bio. I've found that spending a minute or less on the first message is the way to go. The goal of the first message is to get a response. (full examples will be at the end). One girl I matched with had several selfies and one picture of her as a sexy elf. I said, "You must be one of Santa's elves. He forgot to put the keys to my Ferrari in my stocking." Limit it to 2 or 3 sentences max. Keep It Simple Stupid (and funny). She knows I don't have a Ferrari (or do I?). That's the fun of it. Just entertain yourself with the message. If you don't laugh to yourself while typing it she wont either. Self Amusement is the key here and anywhere with women.
Every message should have an expected response. Ask yourself what reply you want to get from her when you send the message. Leave any questions open ended so it can't just be a yes or no answer. If she sends that anyway more than once shes probably not interested (next). Women aren't that dumb. They know why they are on tinder and so do you. They will play into your game if they are interested. If you aren't getting a reply that shows interest she isn't interested (next).
Bonus Tip: If you go for the number and she does something to shy away the question don't ask for it again. It looks needy. Instead ask her to meet for coffee. COFFEE IS ALWAYS THE GO TO TINDER DATE (or drinks but I'm not 21).
Examples Girl 1: One of her pics was with a guy and in her bio it said "That's my brother." (also had something about pizza and drinks) Me - I bet your brother feels honored to be on your tinder. Do you bring him on dates with you? Her - Well yeah of course, wouldn't you bring your older brother on a tinder date? Haha Me - I never go without him. Who else is gonna buy me dinner? Her - Haha exactly! Me - What's your favorite pizza? Her - Pepperoni and pineapple. What about you? Me - Come on you can't be that basic. Her - Oh you'd be surprised (laugh emoji) what's your favorite? Me- Pepperoni and chicken. Her - That's almost just as basic lol Me - What's your number? (set up pizza date).
Girl 2: She had a picture of her dressed as one of Santa's elves. Me - You must be one of Santa's elves. He forgot to put the keys to my Ferrari in my stocking. Her - (3x laughing emoji) is that right? Me - It's been sitting in the garage since christmas. I need those keys! Her - You're silly. Me - I am a goose. Her - 2x laughing emoji Me - You should know this. You are one of Santa's helpers. Her - I do know. I'm sorry. Santa said you were bad and he no longer can give you the keys. Me - If you can find a way to get the keys I'll take you for a ride. Her - I usually don't go against Santa's word. Me - First time for everything. Her - True true Me - Whats your number?
(The goal is to bring her into your frame. Get her to play along. If she does she is interested and will most likely meet you for a date.)
Girl 3: Had a picture of her dressed as a kitty for a sorority mixer. Me - I like your halloween costume. You look like a nice kitty. Her - Haha it wasn't for halloween but thanks. Me - You dress up as a kitty for fun? Her - No lol it was for a mixer. Me - You know you loved it. Her - I did haha. Me - So what kind of kitty are you? Her - Depends on the day and my mood. Me - I'll call you a fiesty kitty then. Her - Sounds fitting. Me - Whats your number?
Girl 4: Had a big sun hat that reminded me of Marry Poppins in her photos. Me - I like your hat it reminds me of Mary Poppins. Try not to get blown away. Her - (likes my message) I love Mary Poppins more than life itself. You just won me over. Me - Whats your number?
Closing Of course some of these are more than 6 messages. It's just a general guideline to help you move things along. Send about two message once you get the number. Don't send "hey this is betabob" send something flirty related to the conversation. Then just plan to meet for coffee or drinks. There are many other guides out there but a lot are pretty confusing. Just have fun with it and let your humor show. Game girls in real life too and it will transfer over. If you are talking to more girls on tinder than in real life you are doing it wrong. P.S. If they message you on bumble literally just don't fuck up. Bumble is the easiest thing to use to get laid.
SargentHaztagaspacho 8y ago
Nice man! I'll review these tips...
On a side note, should I invest in contacts, or could I use them as contrast to my physique?
DadOnDabs 8y ago
contacts. My IOI's have gone way up since I got mine.
SargentHaztagaspacho 8y ago
Ah, you're probably right. I have coke bottle glasses, and I'm no idubbbz.
WASPandNOTsorry 8y ago
Tinder is like 95 % looks. You can take the ugliest girl you know and make a fake tinder profile - she will match with guys in the 90th percentile. If you're not conventionally highly attractive I'd say put your efforts into gaming in real life situations where looks matter less.
HoffAmazing 8y ago
One thing I've noticed is how fucking witty some of you fucks are.... HOW?! How do you think of some of these openers? Don't get me wrong, I'm doing fine but I've stolen most of my openers from here. So far "Please, tell me you aren't as innocent as you look" has worked better than I could have ever imagined.
Trooper_1868 8y ago
Just think of the most ridiculous thing you think you could get away with, frame it properly and fire away. Worse thing that could happen? She won't have a sense of humor.
DadOnDabs 8y ago
Having fun with it is the way to go. Tease girls in real life and it will get easier. I was shitty at first too.
HoffAmazing 8y ago
After the opener I'm pretty solid. I've been getting better but the fucking puns man.... some people are magical with it
LightBearCares 8y ago
Thanks for the post, it really helps.
corsega 8y ago
These are actually pretty decent for a college student. Good work.
[deleted] 8y ago
Time is money. Go to a brothel, get the girl you want and discharge with her your most obscure fantasies. She'll probably would put no red lines at all and you are going to be satisfied chapter than trying to get laid with a below average tinder girl.
ayylma088 8y ago
We are hunters... we live for the thrill of the hunt. Else its not fun
Scandinavianredpill 8y ago
good text. do you know how often you close? I have been on tinder less than a month got over 100 matches (not tinder+). But I find a significant portion of them are just on the site for validation so its kinda hard to keep on having the motivation to write.
MoreTreesPleaseBro 8y ago
My biggest tip for you is to slow down on your swiping. It becomes increasingly harder to close the more women you try to juggle. So I suggest unmatching with those that are obviously not interested and keep trying your luck.
Scandinavianredpill 8y ago
but wont you agree its a ton of work with alot of flakes? I mean I have to force myself not to fap to get into a state where I want to spend the time doing this.
FerociousOreos 8y ago
It can be difficult but that's the game you play if you aren't approaching. Either way you have to dedicate time.
BassNet 8y ago
Even if you are approaching you're playing the same game. I get less flakes from in-person interactions but often I feel like it's still the same fucking game
Scandinavianredpill 8y ago
Yeah I guess I am just tired of having to put so much energy into getting my dick wet.
CollaterLDamage 8y ago
tinder shouldnt be your go to source. face to face and day game matters more than tinder game. laziness is the home of oneitis. you already know how the shit with oneitis goes.
put tinder on the backend.use it between lifts or when your waiting around.
saucedup2 8y ago
Wow you're a pro. I've had little luck just one girl on tinder so far and after looking though her instagram I realized she has an amazing body but a very weird chin and nose I can't get over. Either way I got her number and we're scheduled on Sunday I know she wants the D. What kind of pictures should a guy post on tinder? Also can someone recommend me specific posts I should read on here? I've been a beta throughout most of my life Im still 20 and I'm changing that asap.
ExplodingSamsung 8y ago
Not sure about posts to read on RP about tinder, Don't use tinder that often. But in terms of pictures, the common advice would be to make sure you seem like your life is interesting. The best is to have photos of you with other women. I have 5 photos.
1.) me getting my beard tickled by some guy dressed up like a Satyr at a Renaissance Festival. (I'm not looking at the camera). I'm smiling in the pic. 2.) A pic with a family friend and his GF drinking beer 3.) A general selfie of me 4.) a picture of me and my attractive sister-in-law (bitches obviously won't know thats who it is so again that have photos with girls rule comes into play) 5.) a photo of NY city from the roof of a skyscraper i took when I lived in NY for a few months.
literally nothing special. just a few photos of me having fun. i'm not jacked either. but i average about 7 new matches every 2-3 days. i just have women in my photos. I think the first photo is what's important. I've experimented and swapped the photos in different orders and never get as much success. I also asked 7 new matches if they actually look at photos or if they just swipe and every single one said they look at profiles if the 1st photo grabs their attention. just make sure you're having fun IRL and you should have plenty of good pics.
2gunsgetsome 8y ago
Women want to know: will he look good in public, will he look good in the bedroom, can other people (women) stand to be around him, and most importantly- will my basic life less boring if I hang around with him?
Just like any communication, actions speak louder than words, so SHOW with your pictures that you're fit for the job. It's your "Awesome life resume". All my bio says is my height and neighborhood.
Pic 1: professional quality or at least very high quality shoulders up non-selfie head shot. Since you always have your style and grooming in order (right?) this can be your "everyday" look. Neutral or "gameface" looking down and slightly away from the camera like something else has your attention. If you do look at the camera, smirk and smolder with your eyes. No toothy grins, no sunglasses. Background should be non-distracting and not your dirty room. If at all possible, don't use your cellphone camera for the headshot. Get someone to take your pictures through the longest focal lens they have. Short lenses exaggerate your features in a non-flattering way. Read this
Pic 2: Shirtless doing something natural besides posing. Football at the beach, chopping wood while camping, petting a dog and holding a Frisbee at the park. Not a selfie.
Pic 3: Dressed up with friends having fun. That candid pic from that NYE party when your wore your suit. You can check two boxes if the group is mixed gender and a girl is touching you. If not, posed with your bros is fine.
Pic 4-6: You doing hobbies or shenanigans. If there's another girl in any of these, all the better ("look how much fun she's having!"). Action shots > posed. These are when you should be grinning like a kid. Think "cliche catalog selling stuff for this lifestyle". If you have a boat, it should be the setting for one of these, but not the focus. Avoid the same "local hike with awesome view" that all the other dudes use. These are the pictures she'll be scrolling through after your first 2 made her swipe right, the bait for her to ask about once the conversation is open.
Some examples that have gotten attention for my friends and I:
Caveat / qualifier: I'm mid-30s, 6'3, 195#@~13% BF. I live in a major city. I daygame, but supplement with apps. I open up Tinder every once in a while, but my app success has been with 25-29yo HB7 "career women" almost exclusively using Bumble. Since my goal is to attract women to fuck AND date (fuck multiple times), my picture group is designed to portray myself as a hawt boyfriend prospect. When my account is fresh or reset, I get 10-20 matches per day in the first week, then it tapers off to 2-3 per day for the next couple months. I filter aggressively for investment. I escalate, but rarely press for sex on the first date and if I'm interested enough for dates 2+, it usually happens then.
EDIT to insert link to lens article
Atticus_Crowley 8y ago
I would say, having at least one pic that shows your smile would be a good addition as well. One of my good female friends almost wrote off her now current boyfriend because she was convinced he had a jacked up mouth since he wasn't smiling in any of his pictures.
DadOnDabs 8y ago
I have 3 pics. One is a modeled one I did with a friend. Another is a shirtless mirror selfie. The third is a ski lift selfie. Keep it simple interesting and sexual.
[deleted] 8y ago
High quality pics of you taken with a DSLR. You with friends, you doing fun shit, you shirtless doing something to show off the gainz, and you with a dog, plus you doing a hobby you like.
saucedup2 8y ago
Damn that's exactly what I'm lacking
CollaterLDamage 8y ago
basically, instead of going to a club and telling her all the fun shit you do youre using pictures. nothings really changed.
[deleted] 8y ago
If you have a good IG link that too. I've got about 10k followers and decent pics there so I think it helps too. Once you get the pic game down it becomes much easier
saucedup2 8y ago
Wow how do you get that many followers?
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[deleted] 8y ago
Spend a month dedicating yourself to creating at least 5 interesting photos. I have a friend who does photography and I faked situations with him. One is a pic of me looking at a river, 2 is me on a jet ski ( I didn't even ride that day I just wanted to show bitches I have a jet ski), another is me holding a dog, my last pic is me in front of a tree and one of my friends so it makes it look like I'm interested in hiking or some bullshit. I really don't care if my profile is a lie I use my tinder for one night stands.
saucedup2 8y ago
Yeah I should definitely take a month and get those together selfies will not do me any justice
[deleted] 8y ago
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[deleted] 8y ago
Easy, called friend with nice camera who enjoys taking pictures. Drive to river that's 5 miles away. Take pics. I'm done. Whole process was an hour and cost 0$
[deleted] 8y ago
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[deleted] 8y ago
No because we were by a river and I'm not insecure about myself. He does photo shoots for fun. he didn't care.
bsutansalt 8y ago
You're right about guys overcomplicating things. Sluts gonna slut, so just keep it casual and simple.
My Tinder game is pretty good now. It's fairly concise and naturally filters out the time hos.
Initial text about how it's a match and we should get to know each other before racing off to Vegas together. This sets up a togetherness vibe of us/we doing stuff in an imagined way. This already has us off on the right foot and creates an imaginary commonality (something she can imagine/fantasize about).
They respond or they don't. Do NOT get butthurt if they don't reply. You have no idea how many accounts are inactive, bots, and generally fake.
Light banter followed by me stating how the app kills my battery and I give them my number and to text me
Those who text me are game and already hooked, so I don't need to do a song and dance to get them to meet up. Those who don't text just disqualified themselves as time hos.
A couple texts exchanged setting up logistics
All that being said, younger women are harder to pull. Women 30-35 are the easiest, but I don't prefer them, so for me it's a crapshoot. I'd say about half of the younger women 18-22 who do match with me are wannabe sugar babies. Only they never actually want to do the things sugar babies are supposed to do (low-grade escorts). The other half are spammers/scams. Maybe once in a blue moon are they legit daddy issues and wants to date someone with a big age gap.
Something else I'll add is that I lack any real escalation or edginess, which is something I'm working on. I need to figure out a way of giving it a sexual subtext/undertone so when we meet there's already a sexual tension. Escalating in person isn't so much an issue, but I'd like to be able to hit the ground running. Right now I'm lacking that a lot of times and the handful of times I have tried to force it via text or on the app, they sense it and stop talking.
mocket_ran 8y ago
Totally agree about the younger women. I match with them all the time but it's one word answers, no answers, or total reluctance to commit to anything. I find in general young hot girls inept when it comes to making long term plans...and by long term I mean for the next fucking day. They generally are just swept in the direction that the current of life is sweeping them in that exact moment and if they are hot there are allot of currents. Like a horse with blinders that can only see what is directly in front of their face.... so you need to go out and get in front of their face to really score 10's.
NihilistMonkey 8y ago
I do something similar, except I go for their number and use the reasoning that I don't like texting. It has several benefits. First, when you're talking on the phone, they actually have to think fast and respond, not just look at your text and mull it over and never respond. Second, I have a deep voice and chicks dig it. Third, I have decent verbal game which sets me above a lot of guys. Text game is easy to learn, you don't have to think quickly, and you're not setting yourself above anyone else when you use it. Not saying it's not a skill worth having, it's just a prerequisite. Nothing special.
bsutansalt 8y ago
I've been thinking of that as well. i'd like to call them, but most don't bother texting until after 10. I do believe this might be them hinting at booty call, but who knows.
thisornothing 8y ago
I wouldn't bother with the whole battery bit. Comes across as a bit engineered - I know, because I said similar things myself to get a number like "I hate using this app". Just ask for the number, you both know why you're asking, don't apologise for it.
bsutansalt 8y ago
It's true though. It's an older phone with the process lock of some type that prevents some apps from fully closing and kills the battery unless I use a specific charger.
Also, about twice a week I get complimented by women on how smooth the transition is, so even if it were manufactured they dig it.
DiggerClam 8y ago
"Tinder kills my battery. It's an older phone with the process lock of some type that prevents some apps from fully closing and kills the battery unless I use a specific charger. Here's my number, text me".
Smooth as silk
mangus89 8y ago
Ahahaha I laughed out loud at that
bsutansalt 8y ago
I'd never say that unless directly asked/challenged, but a trimmed justification may indeed ground the number close and feel like a cheesy pickup.
groupof7 8y ago
Have you had much luck with the direct approach - i.e. "Let's grab a drink" - right off the cuff?
[deleted] 8y ago
doesn't really work IME. At least not in NYC where everybody uses 4+ apps and they are swarmed with these kinds of texts.
Might wanna try something objectively funny and laidback that gets her to react. Then maybe another one. Then ask her out. Just like in real life where you'd shoot a minimal amount of shit before saying "hey what are you doing tomorrow afterwork, we could go out" "oh no not tomorrow I can't because of XYZ (fucking someone else getting free restaurants yadda yadda)" "alright just give me your phone# we'll figure it out"
bsutansalt 8y ago
Yes and no. The other profile I tested with a male model's pictures, yes all the time, and tons of positive replies just for "dtf?". With mine on the app, not really, but once we're texting, yes.
I think for them it feels more real once you get them off the app and onto their contact list. That's just my theory anyway. The digital venue change working well could also be because it's the beginnings of a yes ladder/compliance chain. Going for "let's grab a drink" via the app doesn't pan out very well as it's direct and do the point, which is fine if you're super physically attractive and they're ready to fuck RFN.
If I had to guess, I bet just going with 'dtf?' would get similar results as trying to go straight for a date becuase you're still demanding/suggesting they give you some level of commitment and investment.
groupof7 8y ago
Out of about 13 attempts, I've had 4 first dates and 3 "x doesn't work, what about y". The responses are all from women in their 30s and 40s. The no responses were mid to late 20s. My rational was that they swiped right, so unless they're complete validation whores, they're interested. Why mince words?
I'm guessing this is age-specific and will default back to putting some effort into openers for younger women. Thanks guys.
Inappropriate_Comma 8y ago
After establishing that we are going to meet for a drink, my go to is "Let's move this convo off of <name of app>. 555-515-5555. Shoot me a text and let's figure something out."
Straight forward, no gimmick (your line is a gimmick regardless of if it's true or not.)
bsutansalt 8y ago
Modify that by taking the lead. Instead of "Shoot me a text and let's figure something out." change it to "Shoot me a text and I'll set something up."
Inappropriate_Comma 8y ago
Nice. Never had an issue with mine, but you're right, "figure something out" isn't as strong as "set something up".. I'm still partial to keeping the wording as if she's involved in the process, but that's just my personality type. "and we'll set something up" will likely be my modifier from here on out.
bsutansalt 8y ago
Be careful of I vs We.
"I'll set something up" implies taking charge and leadership, and if you come up with something she can still veto it if she desires.
"We'll set something up" can cause her to feel like you're making a decision for her whether she'd agree to it or not, and thus can actually work against you as she's being controlled. Sometimes they go for that or don't care, but in my experience it will cause them to balk more than anything, just from that slight change.
Inappropriate_Comma 8y ago
I appreciate that outlook, but in my opinion "I'll" is more on the arrogant side, where "we'll" is more inclusive since she is being included on the figuring out portion. If "I'll" works for you though, by all means go for it.. I f-close too many tinderellas to swap up my method now.. ;)
[deleted] 8y ago
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2jz240sx 8y ago
I have so many #s from chicks I've met online I could probably make some money selling them to marketing firms lol
fartingaround 8y ago
this guy is actlly pretty slick, im taking notes
Andgelyo 8y ago
Why is this shit new to TRP lurkers here? I swear it's like people outside the metropolitan NJ/NY area are autistic with no social skills/text game. Tinder is for banging sluts, so you must immediately elevate. If you don't get her number within the first 6 messages you're done. Not rocket science.
TALzFGxawb 8y ago
in smaller places, the women are more skittish. there's a higher chance you have mutual friends or something, and your queue will literally run out of matches
i don't think this changes the optimal strategy, but it can harm the abundance mentality that something like tinder is supposed to have
(to people in that situation: move to a big city. it's more important than lifting)
NihilistMonkey 8y ago
Depends on where you live. My old town I'd say about 40% of my swipes had mutual friends attached. Gotta play it differently when word can get around. Don't have these problems now that I'm in a bigger city.
RPDrogan 8y ago
Tinder makes it incredibly easy to find women to sleep with, but I can't say I like the app. Unless you're desperate to get laid, tinder isn't necessary. I consider it a good tool for people just learning to interact with women and looking for the easy way to get a lay and get experience.
Nothing matches actually going out and getting women. And you will almost never find a tinder woman that's as attractive as a 10 you bump into on the street. 10s on tinder aren't 10s in real life. And the 1s that are don't need to use tinder because if they're a 10 in real life, they have guys hitting on them daily. If a woman is using tinder, there's a reason she's using tinder.
If you want to text game 7s and lower while on the toilet, tinder is the place to be. You can get laid pretty consistently. But it's not really an accomplishment.
ShakaLeonidas 8y ago
None of them are an accomplishment. Once you fuck one HB10 you haven't "fucked them All" but after three HB10s, there no different from the HB5s. The BS of all women gets irky and you'll start looking for the path of least resisitance from HB4-10 merely to drain your balls and get back to what you want to accomplish out of life. Female Validation becomes irrelevant after you leave HS/college. The most beautiful women HB8-10 are for sale. HB6-7 are commoner time,energy,money drains. HB3-5 are the midst opionated and "Victimized" chick's on planet earth and HB1-3 unfurtunately have a serious physical disability or disorder and 9/10 its just immoral to exploit them. Only time a womans attention is really valid is when she sacrifices to save you time ,money or energy. Other than that find one you can afford$$$ to keep if you want or loose if you can't.
The_rectumwrecker 8y ago
While I'm on the toilet is pretty much the only time I'll use tinder.
Jackrabbit710 8y ago
Yep tinders a bad place to start with regards to game. The whole 'boost' thing had pushed it even further into being a giant cash grab from men
RedditAdminsSuck_88 8y ago
If you can get it done in 1 or 2 messages, the better. It's what I shoot for, anyway.
askmrcia 8y ago
You're right, I usually do one or two and it really depends on how they respond to my first message.
I message every girl "so you're going to make me message you first huh?"
If they respond in one word, then I ask them out instantly.
If they respond in like a nice little paragraph asking me an open ended question, then yes, six messages or so will work.
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Pepe_Prime 8y ago
Great post. As a personal anecdote, I've had success with this method by pure chance before reading this.
crash1082 8y ago
Fuck, I pulled a beta bob yesterday. Live and you learn.
epistemic_humility 8y ago
Awalt in every way. I use a single opener on everybody second message is a tailored follow-up and third is asking for snapchat or digits.
It's almost feels too easy. But living near colleges and in a bigger city helps.
[deleted] 8y ago
That's some killer advice. It's all about being a man, being strong and in control, dominating her with your mind games. It's so damn fun !
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thisornothing 8y ago
Sound advice. You know what you want, don't waste your time chasing women unwilling to meet. 6 messages seems like the right number from my experience.
rashnull 8y ago
Lol! All your texts sounded like they were coming right out of my mouth! You've done well young lad!