Part One is is my profile, which I can't link (archive.is goes to quarantine page)
Intro
One of the quintessential mistakes TRP newbies make is assuming the rules don't apply to them (or their unicorn).
This miniseries is practical advice into why certain red rules exist, and who gets to break them. Here are two more "rules".
Don't shit where you eat
An absolute classic. Let's break down a few elements of this amazing phrase:
What does this rule mean? - part of the genius of the rule is its phrasing. It is NOT "don't fuck people you work with". The reason for this is simple - the rule applies in many environments where you don't earn a living.
Any time I see noobs asking "how do I game girls at [inappropriate venue]" my answer is always this rule.
Analogy: The gym is where you go to get big and do you. Don't fuck it up by becoming the creepy guy, don't use it as a buffer to not hit on girls anywhere else, and the most important point: YOU'RE NOT READY.
Asking internet strangers for advice on some weirdly specific strategy assigns a high probability to
- OP's oneitis hanging out there OR
Who can break this rule? - people who work in the service industry (food, drinks, hospitality, hotels, etc.) It is an all out culturally acceptable fuck fest out there. otherwise please ask yourself one simple question:
- "Is the value I derive from this activity worth losing for the girl?"
If YES, think twice and go for it later. If NO, are you abundant?
Guys successful with women can break all the rules
Good to borrow where rewriting the content is a waste of time. From /u/KeffirLime: (my one insertion [in brackets])
Who can break this rule?
The important distinction to make for newbies is they [Alpha/Chad/Whatever boogeyman you've invented] aren't successful with women because they break the rules, they can break the rules because they're succesful with women.
Female friendships work because they're in the friendzone, not you.
Texting outside the rules works because they're gaming you, not you trying to game them.
It all comes down to value and who's in control.
What does this rule mean
Now i'll quote myself, in terms of the first topic discussed in Post #1:
- Friends on your terms with benefits to you = good.
- Friends on her terms = almost exclusively bad for you.
Where do /u/KeffirLime and I agree? Simple - when you hold the power and direct the relationship, you don't need rules.
The rules are meant to constrain your shitty behavior, not control you. Without shitty behavior on your part, the rule becomes irrelevant! The number one mistake, however, is confusing the reason why breaking the rule worked.
Conclusions
-
Don't shit where you eat, unless you're in the service industry in which case go ahead
-
Be prepared to lose a thing you enjoy (gym, hobby, work) if you pursue a girl in that circle
- Breaking rules is primarily the result of success in the Sexual Marketplace, not a cause of success
winnnnnnnnn 5y ago
Agreed I train at literally 1 of the top 5 Brazilian jiu jitsu gyms in the world tons of decent looking females there not interested in doing anything but choking the shxt out of them on the mats of course would never fxck up something I do 9x a week that provides self sustaining confidence for ass lol
entrep4 5y ago
I don't see how I'd lose a thing I enjoy just because I tried to pick up a girl there. I'm not gonna stop going to the gym just because of a girl. Could you explain this part?
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HurricaneHugues 5y ago
Go to multiple gyms? What the fuck?
Do u even lift?
swampbastard69 5y ago
I agree with OP, the gym is your place. Once you bang a girl there its no longer your place. If you go to a globogym and could switch easily then who cares. I go to a MMA type gym so its more specific, I would never soil those waters.
SirKolbath 5y ago
You’ve never been around someone accused of sexual harassment, or even of just being “creepy”. I assure you, if a girl goes to your gym manager and says, “That guy hit on me and it made me uncomfortable.” You are done at that gym. He is not going to balance your paltry $35 a month against a potential lawsuit or bad press from her. Even if there isn’t enough evidence for a suit, if she runs to yelp and starts complaining there, he can and will lose thousands of dollars in business. Faced with that, he will punt you out the door with a smile on his face and a song in his heart.
[deleted] 5y ago
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09876537895 5y ago
Or just get shit from your friends for awhile. I'm living proof
gbdoragnic 5y ago
Drama finds a way, it's a defensive driving course tactic , even if she doesn't accuse you of rape, she can accuse you of hurting your feelings, turn other beta's against you, create negative energy , to which you will most likely find a new gym
entrep4 5y ago
I dunno. In gyms where I live, people don't really talk to each other all that much. I doubt that any girl could get a whole group of betas to team up on me. And if she hated me that much she'd probably just leave herself.
odin1111 5y ago
Cool bro, throw up a data sheet of your exploits with the ladies at the gym. Put your money where your mouth is.
You won't though, cause you know we're right. You don't have THE BALLS to prove us wrong, other than Keyboard Warrioring it.
entrep4 5y ago
Who is pathetic enough to keep a spreadsheet of every girl they've been with?
Pestilence1911 5y ago
Its 2018 dude.
You dont have an Excell.doc with all the stats?
furiouszeno 5y ago
Ok, go try it at your gym then report back to us how things are going a few months later.
p3n1x 5y ago
You are trying to rationalize it. It is a "general" rule to protect yourself from potential drama that can kill your fun places.
You enjoy drama or you are being a bit narrow minded assuming that a scorned woman can't fuck with you.
Frich3 5y ago
worked at a big corporate gym for 6 months a few months ago.. front desk to be exact. so I was meeting and greeting EVERYTHING that walked in.
All in all, it can be done. But be cool. DOnt come off as needy. And try and build a friendship first or youll end up looking creepy.
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cakefmateus 5y ago
Do you think this rule applies to girls on your class?, in college should you hit on girls from other classes?. It's not work but it will be people you'll see in your day-to-day life and probably depend on at some point
swampbastard69 5y ago
in college bang every girl you possibly can, and dont even think about a girlfriend, it doesn't matter. Once you leave college you compete for girls your age with older men, get it while its hot.
GoSuckEggs 5y ago
i like bumblebee... bumblebee tuna.
Rabbit-Punch 5y ago
it’s not like college life disappears when you graduate
swampbastard69 5y ago
It doesn’t but you have less competition now so take advantage
Rabbit-Punch 5y ago
I meant to say that I am out of college but I still attend stuff from my college since its local.
rebelde_sin_causa 5y ago
The don't shit where you eat rule is stressed a little too much as gospel, because for a lot of jobs WGAS anyway, you can always find another restaurant to work at.... this rule could be better clarified as don't shit where your career is
HumanSockPuppet 5y ago
We describe the rules overly-strict on purpose.
Betafag hope is a liquid. If you leave a crack somewhere, it tends to ooze out of its container and leave a trailing mess. Every RP initiate wants to be a special snowflake with an exception to his situation.
Better to let the candidate learn with time and experience in the field which laws can be bent.
furiouszeno 5y ago
It's like the military. In bootcamp the rules are strict and not to be broken, because you don't know how the system works yet. Once you have graduated bootcamp and have been deployed, you realize that experienced soldiers can get away with breaking the rules because they understand how the system works and know how to break the rules without fucking everything up. (Although then again, even "experienced" guys can still fuck things up by breaking the rules)
SirKolbath 5y ago
I find it adorable that you younguns think shit you do in your part time McJob won’t come back to haunt you.
I have been a direct hiring manager. In that capacity I have called McDonald’s to ask about the work ethic of an intern. I discovered that a guy who worked for a landscaping company three years before he applied to work at my company had used the company gas card to fill up his own car a couple times and I chose not to hire him.
Now what do you think I’m going to do if I call your restaurant manager to ask about your work history and he says, “Well, he was a good worker, but he hit on a lot of the female staff.”
He doesn’t even have to tell me that they didn’t want you to hit on them. The fact that you’re trying to get laid at work means you’re not working, and I am not interested in hiring you.
Millennials can always find an excuse to explain why they didn’t follow a rule. As an employer I am not interested in your excuses. I’m looking to hire you to work. If anything in your history presents the idea that you don’t work while you’re on the clock, I’ll find someone who will and you can go back to that McJob to pay your bills.
HurricaneHugues 5y ago
Not all jobs are allowed to disclose that type of information. Some jobs ate only allowed to say that yes you did in fact work there but aren't at the liberty to comment on it.
SirKolbath 5y ago
So? If you think that has ever stopped a previous boss from giving negative feedback on a former employee then you have clearly never been in an HR position.
Trust me, if a manager thinks you were a poor employee for any reason, including hitting on other employees, he will find a way to let a prospective employer know during a background verification call.
10211799107 5y ago
Can't agree more. Not a hiring manager but had my fair share of "nope fuck this guy" because of what we found when calling previous engineerig firms when looking to hire a new engineer.
ScroogeMcDaq 5y ago
Heard about flings between coworkers are common in advertising and marketing agencies.
There was some Ask HN topic on YCombinator's hacker news about partying in work. Someone told about orgies with coworkers and hookers is quite common for higher managers in big financial companies - mostly as a part of finishing-a-deal parties. Don't know it's true, never been there.
odin1111 5y ago
This is true, but. . .
1)that was more true 10-15 years ago
2)#metoo so just hookers now
3)you have to be proven to get to that point in the corporate ladder ANYWAY, so. . .yeah 99% of the people here will NEVER qualify for that.
So you can use that example as YOUR justification for shitting where you eat. But it's pretty stupid of you to do so.
BUUUUT!! Since you're looking for excuses, someone's "blessing," then go do it. do it all the time until you learn. You're not convinced, so, go convince yourself.
ScroogeMcDaq 5y ago
Nope, not looking for excuses at all, because I wouldn't do this if had not approval of people above me. Just posted this hoping someone reply and confirm it may be true. You haven't dissapointed me, thanks :)
Yoasted 5y ago
I fuck girls from gym, who cares? It's an environment of women who are fit and share a common interest. It's also my social playground. I catch tons of IOI's there while i have my swole on. I think it's a great place to game women and im never gonna stop going to the gym because of a girl.
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Yoasted 5y ago
Absolutely. And a great position youre in.
nebder 5y ago
What works for the fit regulars absolutely will not work for the noob 2 months into a gym routine.
Rules are rules for a reason. Follow them until it becomes very clear that you don’t need to follow this specific rule.
That said, don’t shit where you eat at your place of employment is a 100% no excuses never break this hard rule. (I will agree service work like restaurants are exempt, that is the only caveat)
Yoasted 5y ago
Totally man. Im 6'4 and on steroids so it's my favourite place to do it. Fucked a chick from work last year and didnt have the greatest turnover because of this fucking cuck ass white knight.
odin1111 5y ago
ok good for you. do a field report,
zfrogo 5y ago
Thanks for the information man
Fulltilt_Ronny 5y ago
These rules are easy for me because
gurls in my gym or workplace are not interested in me
there are no Girls to meet in my Hobby (gaming)
but thanks anyway :)
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