We discuss hypergamy here all the time and its pretty clear why younger women cheat: The biological urge, or craving for high quality and diverse sperm to help her perpetuate the human race.
What about mid30s to mid40s women? Sometimes they have a terrific provider who would do anything for them. They have kids and consciously know they don't want more children. They have good lives with cushy jobs (if any). What motivates a milf to sleep around and risk the good life?
Thankfully, TRP has theultmatecad hard at work investigating these questions. For those of you who need background, I "wised up" to game in my late 30s after catching my wife in a pack of lies. I took things real slow as to not fuck up my lifestyle and my kids lives. I never even asked her about the "truth", what good would that do me? I get the joke now, Eternal romantic love is the spoon from the matrix: There is no spoon®
No, I moved on and have been fucking inside my social circle and learned the following:
"Settled" married woman are bored to death. Most of them own their husband outright and say things like " I'll have him bring the kids to practice" or " You need to take me to the Caribbean". Then Jackass does it. I'm not throwing stones, I was him once.
This ennui leads to very bad places for both parties in a marriage. Like her sucking other men's cocks in hotel rooms, begging him to cum in her to "force the situation". I've seen this at least three times this year, always the same, even if the names and circumstances change.
Men don't get boooooooooooooored and cheat. They generally cheat because they need sex that their wives don't provide.
If you are in an LTR and think you can coast, you are dead wrong. Tingles must be provided, if not by you then by me. Or someone just like me.
fingerthemoon 8y ago
I've never met a woman who was satisfied with her life (except briefly right after I've rung her bell). They always want more and more. Bigger, better, faster, shinier. I think it's in their nature not to be pleased.
All these shows they watch fill their little heads with infidelity stories. Ever watch a soap opera? It's all about who's cheating with who. Drama, sex, drama, sex.
My ex was really into Twilight and all those kinda shows. The main theme is a woman who has two guys fighting for her and she can't decide which one she wants more. Well, that's exactly what she created in real life. I almost got violent with other dude a few times while raging with jealousy, but I would have just walked away if she ended it clean. She came back and left again 3 times. Told me she couldn't decide etc. Eventually I cut her off and went full no contact.
ComradeCynic 8y ago
Also https://dalrock.wordpress.com/2010/11/02/the-whispers/
[deleted] 8y ago
Keeping up with the Jones is hardwired feminine trait. Dont hate the woman for it, learn to control it
ECoast_Man 8y ago
But, but, but if a woman cheats it's because she was feeling lonely and fucking Chad was the only viable option? It's not her fault really?
Never mind if it's a guy, he should have 'sought counselling' for his perverse needs.
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obama_lurves_nsa 8y ago
Don't worry I understood your light sarcasm.
Yes if women cheat it's the mans fault and if men cheat it's the mans fault
ECoast_Man 8y ago
I wasn't worried?
Not sure the point of your comment. Anyone with an above Down Syndrome's IQ would understand my comment.
maadkekz 8y ago
Why bother getting a partner of wife in the first place? It's so fucked up that women need to be constantly entertained and looked after as if they were kids on Ritalin. That, or you take the risk they'll cheat on your ass in search of their next tingles fix.
It's exhausting.
[deleted] 8y ago
Because we're goddamn retarded, and have too much fucking hope. Nothing in life lasts, but it doesn't stop up from trying.
Though just like a moment, the harder you try to hold on, the faster she escapes.
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TheReformist94 8y ago
Exactly.its such a shit deal.id just cheat tbh o don't see what's wrong with it given all that's written in this post.also,a woman who denies sex whilst taking resources is ground to cheat
[deleted] 8y ago
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0xdada 8y ago
Thinking if you want kids, you might need to be able to go into it accepting that you might lose them and they will have to find their way back to you on their own terms. Be something they will want to find their way back to. Things are fucked. We don't have control, even (especially) over kids.
That's the big scary part, but what can you do? The stoics (Epictitus) would say it's not your child, but a child that you care for. I'm thinking of having kids and going into it intending to accept that they might not be a permanent fixture in my life.
Men endure that loss every day, it's not what happens, but how you respond that matters.
Danedina 8y ago
When I left my wife she went through a short hysterical phase, but she quickly came to the realization that joint custody meant more free time for her. We've managed to stay on good terms and cooperate as much as can be expected. She is a reasonable person for the most part, which is no accident, as I wouldn't have married a lunatic/imbecile.
One important caveat to all of this is that my ex managed to get back together with an ex-boyfriend and they're happy together. If she were single and I was still with my young big titty girlfriend then she'd be less cooperative, that's for sure.
JD_Fathead 8y ago
TRP won't answer those questions. TRP teaches you how to be attractive to women by focusing on you. YOU have to decide how that fits into the rest of your life (faith, family, work, etc).
[deleted] 8y ago
I have no advice only because I had my kids expecting the blue pill fantasy. Now I play damage control.
Still, I love being a dad
RP15 8y ago
When you say damage control, do you mean that you slowly guide them to the red pill proactively? Or do you wait until life events that allow you to make the red pill clear?
fasterpussycatdie 8y ago
Fucking damage control.
It's a never ending siege against the blue pill engine and it never stops.
Whenever my kids bring up some blue pill BS I just start asking them questions rather than tell them why their wrong. Once they start to doubt themselves you can see it in their eyes. That's when I tell them how it really is. You can never relax though.
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fingerthemoon 8y ago
Then again, a lot of women are more than happy to drop the kids off with you so they can go do what they want. Children are a big responsibility and require years of sacrifice. Many of today's women are not used to sacrificing for another and seriously struggle with parenthood.
I've known many single moms because I lived in Hawaii for many years and they tend to migrate there. I was a single dad and these women where constantly trying to leave their kids with me.
I separated from my babies mama when my daughter was 1. Mama just wanted to party and I ended up taking my daughter 4-5 days a week for the first 5 years. Then things became more equal because I wanted them to.
My daughter is beautiful and super chill. She was a chick magnet, so I was never really alone. I always had young single ladies more than willing to play stepmom. They'd cook and clean, take care of my daughter and I'd fuck them good. Picking up girls as a single dad was effortless. They'd see how good I was with my daughter, how much she loved me and our strong connection. That combined with my natural alpha traits was irresistible to most of them.
Stythe 8y ago
This was my case. My mother's combination of constantly reassuring me immediately instead of having me face hardships and shit-talking my dad (who was rarely in my life and didn't ever connect with me, though at the very least was real about my mom when he spoke) caused me to internalize a very toxic system of living, resulting in me needing immediate gratification or feeling like a failure. I had a severe perfectionist streak and fear of rejection as a result. On a su conscious level, I fought against it for almost a decade and only after the relationship with the ex who landed me here could I put all the pieces together.
While I've never been more self-assured and my confidence is through the roof due to knowing I can fail gracefully, I've never been so disappointed with the state of affairs in the world. I used to want a family. Now I realize how lousy this world is to children given the circumstances we live in.
[deleted] 8y ago
True for most women but not all. My mom never spoke poorly about my dad and even denied alimony. She hates parasites.
Janus_Fawkes 8y ago
I wish something like this wasn't so rare a case.
[deleted] 8y ago
Don't lose hope though.
There are virtuous women out there..
Somewhere..
itsbooming 8y ago
Even the bible said the value of a virtuous women is worth more than gold/rubies/money itself. Not her weight in gold, but gold itself.
I agree there might be one out there, but considering it was rare enough in Biblical (redpill before redpill was a thing) times to deserve that type of praise I wouldn't hold my breath on it.
[deleted] 8y ago
You say that like it's meaningful.
I just went and read Proverbs 31 and the surrounding text, and other than that line it's all kind of bullshit, the virtues listed that follow are kind of archaic, all about how to take care of the house, respect her family, and fear god, and it doesn't mention gold itself, or her weight in gold, it kind of implies that it's just worth more than *some* gold.
But you are right that it's rare, but not that rare, you just wont find them in nightclubs and on tinder. I just got my heart broken by one, for she was far more virtuous than I.
itsbooming 8y ago
Ah, sorry for not conveying what I meant correctly.
AWALT.
I hate being the guy that just spouts one-liner-sidebars at people but there are times you have to.
[deleted] 8y ago
AWALT is a warning. It doesn't literally mean all women are the same, it just means to watch out for their nature. To be aware of their narcissism and hypergamy.
Yeah, she left because I became weak, and she saw better options in men, in that sense AWALT.
But she was also more rational, responsible, creative, brave, kind, humble, considerate, and resilient than any other woman I met, more so than most men I know, even.
And I will not be satisfied in another woman until I find someone like her again, but I need to get my shit together first before such a woman would even consider me again.
'Till then I'll be smashing "AWALT" basic bitches.
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NiftyDolphin 8y ago
Ooooh, so close. What I used to hear all of the time is "I'll let him do <chore>."
The women in my circle now know better to say this in my presence, as I refuse their kind "offer" and "let" them do it themselves.
Tingles don't keep the cads away, it's fear. Fear of judgement, fear of loss of status or possessions, fear of violence. Providing tingles implies that if you give them this, they will be content.
I've never seen a woman be content for very long. They always want what they have now +1.
[deleted] 8y ago
Agreed, tingles alone wont protect a man.
He also needs her to believe that he will find out and he will leave her
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[deleted] 8y ago
They cheat because they can. So why not.
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favours_of_the_moon 8y ago
Great analysis.
Yeah, to fulfill the need not only for sex, but validation and general gratification. A woman will build that tension up with negativity and passive aggressive mindrape. Then when you try to release, it, she will unleash the full weight of society upon you. Or try to do so.
spookyman212 8y ago
So you're saying you now fuck other guys wives? Because your wife cheated on you.
[deleted] 8y ago
I read it as he fucks other guys wives because a) he can, b)it's fun.
Nycredpilldad 8y ago
Somebody fucked my lady, & he can have the frigid fucked up bitch that she is. I'm fucking someone else's wife right now, she's "separated" & sexual strategy has no morals. AWALT.....
[deleted] 8y ago
Pretty much although you simplify things greatly.
spookyman212 8y ago
Do you deliberately seek out married women? I'm not trying to offend you. I'm just curious.
[deleted] 8y ago
spooky there are guys out there who target married women because of how easy it is, even if it is playing with nitroglycerin.
[deleted] 8y ago
I do. Especially those with more to lose then myself. I got very serious IOIs from a sexy physician last week but she is divorced and I am certain I'll never have enough time for her. I'm not looking to get caught, I'm just not afraid of it
spookyman212 8y ago
It just seems like its being vindictive. I mean whats the difference if a girl is married or not? Is it about getting back for being cheated on. Or is it exciting that she has a husband. Like there is seriously potential of being shot for rubbing another mans rhubarb. I can't believe you find married women easyer. That's not too comforting to a guy whos engaged and working away from home.
FearDearg2015 8y ago
Married women will probably be the easiest, since they already have a beta bux on lock down, and they are close to the wall or maybe already post wall. A small bit on the side would be nothing to them.
[deleted] 8y ago
If not, me then it will be someone else. Who says you get to be comfortable? This is TRP and we speak about reality, we dont give brohugs
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spectrum_92 8y ago
Wait so women cheat because they're stupid and unaccountable, but when men cheat they're playing by the rules and benefiting everyone else? What a load of shit!
thehonestdouchebag 8y ago
Summed up by Draper in Mad Men : " What you call love was invented by guys like me, to sell nylons. You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "
javi404 8y ago
These are words to live by. If you remember these words when arguing with a woman, you won't even need to argue.
[deleted] 8y ago
One, it's weird to present women cheating as "they can't control their baser instincts, we must reign them in or women will destroy society" and men cheating as "he's an in control, aware, machavellian manipulator and him cheating will benefit everyone." Why isn't a cheating woman also "simply playing by the true rules that exist"?
Two, if there are kids involved, then the man cheating will condemn those kids to be raised by a single mom.
reigorius 8y ago
You're pointing to a truth that is hard to swallow. And it is hard because we make the mistake of viewing women as equals, with the same sense of loyalty, reason and accountability as our close male peers. Because that is how most men are. Loyal, reasonable and accountable to a certain acceptable degree.
But we get furious when women show their nature. Which is vomit-inducing hypergamy. Resulting in disloyalty, distorted reality to justify their actions and blaming the other side of the bed for the why and how.
The whole reason why TRP exists is we men have been made to believe women are our equals and we can hold them up to the same standards as we are being hold up upon. Sure, women can and do act to be loyal, reasonable and accountable. But their nature also dictates they react to and act upon what kind of emotions they feel and present these as true, solid and well grounded thoughts to do what they just did. And get away with it.
Resulting in men whose hearts are ripped right out of their chest still beating the love song. Destroyed boyfriends or husbands who thought that women stay loyal through good times and bad times. Totally disillusioned men who believed the past matters, believing there is a bank account where we deposited our love, our hard labor & our sacrifices with an ATM where we can draw from in times of need. Utterly confused guys who made fruitless efforts to understand why women say this, but do that. And lastly, frustrated guys who tried in eternal vain to reason with women and their emotions hoping to formulate something that makes sense to him and her.
I see it so often in TRP and MRP. We make the fundamental mistake of holding women up to the same standards as men. I do and it is fucking hard not to. And we often forget to see our own biggest weakness. And that is that we want women. We want to love them and be loved back. We want to be loyal to them and feel safe when we inevitable have our own moments of weakness. We want to be reasonable and ask for the same.
But sadly, only in stories does this happen. Real life is ugly as the countless stories here and on r relationship prove over and over again.
It all boils down to: do it all for you. Whatever action you take, do it for the sole purpose of personal benefaction. And if you so choose, you allow a woman to pluck the fruits of your labor and decisions. You offer a place to rest against the trunk of your tree, providing shade and shelter. But don't expect to find a tree with the same benefits when you visit her orchard. It just doesn't work like that. There is no equality.
And please, for your own sake, don't fall for the fallacy that if you lift, work hard and improve your overall life and appearance, you will be rewarded with a great girl. I foolishly held on to that believe when I submerged myself in TRP. But it's the same idiocy as blowing yourself up in the believe of the promised land in heaven and a 100 virgins.
Don't do it for them, do it for you.
[deleted] 8y ago
There is no them there's only you. You are alone inside your brain, with only the nerve impulses interpreted from the outside world.
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CuriousMaster303 8y ago
This! Learned it the hard way :(
[deleted] 8y ago
It's easy to parrot theory you've read about. The hard part is internalizing the knowledge until it's second nature. "Wisdom is nothing more prudent than the ability to follow your own advice." - Sam Harris
So many times I learned it the hard way too. But the education you get from the school of hard knocks makes it sure you will never forget it. Be glad you got your lessons when you did, too many others aren't so lucky.
interestedplayer 8y ago
Because men have both r & K strategies as legitimate biological options, whereas women only have K. Go read basic evopsych/the sidebar
[deleted] 8y ago
Men despise sluts, women are turned on by a man who sleeps with many women. It's always been that way and always will be.
Doesn't matter if you or anyone else thinks it's unfair
TheRightPrices 8y ago
Men love sluts... just not for commitment
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vengefully_yours 8y ago
They're all sluts, some are more discrete than others, some are less inclined to follow her nature, but rest assured every one of them is a slut for someone.
HeinousFu_kery 8y ago
Men love what sluts do for them, not the sluts themselves. FTFY.
TheRightPrices 8y ago
Touche.
I should of elaborated that men love the concept of sluts and not the sluts themselves.
[deleted] 8y ago
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voomer53 8y ago
This app needs a spell checker....
[deleted] 8y ago
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[deleted] 8y ago
I was raised by a single mom myself, so it's a touchy subject for me, but I will admit that I made my point with needless drama. Hence I edited it, but apparently you saw the original. No matter.
Anyway, if you think I'm wrong, tell me why I'm wrong. I promise I'll keep a level head.
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BluepillProfessor 8y ago
Are you serious? What father's get a free pass?
[deleted] 8y ago
I think it's awesome that you're raising your daughter. From the statistics I've seen, single fathers raise better children than single mothers.
Unfortunately, if a man cheats on his wife, then in practice the kid(s) will nearly always go towards the mom. (They usually go towards the mom even if she's the one cheating.) No matter how much the father may want to raise the kid(s), he'll often not have the opportunity to do so. And being raised by single moms is bad for the kid.
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reigorius 8y ago
If you care to share, what kind of part does your ex-wife have in the life of your daughter?
[deleted] 8y ago
By your logic, then a man with children should cower in the corner waiting for his wife to tell him what to do because it's best for the children.
[deleted] 8y ago
In your other reply to me, you made a good point about women becoming less attractive while men become more attractive as they have more partners.
However, here I think you're being unfair. I made the point that if you cheat on your wife and you have kids together, then the woman will probably get custody over the children and being raised by single moms is bad for them. Saying "oh so you claim that you should cower in the corner then?" is strawmanning. There are options besides the nuclear one that you can try, such as dread game.
[deleted] 8y ago
You seem to think cheating on wife equals she divorces you.
Ok sure...betas wife never fucks him, she nags him and he is 0 for 10000000000 in passing shit tests, he has a beta puke affair then yea...She gets to play victim and take him to cleaners.
Another situation is where the wife is NEVER going to replace her husband with anyone as good. This guy kicks ass and looks great. She will tolerate his affairs "for the good of the children"
Dread game is terrific and serves a purpose. I don't sleep around to keep wife in check, I do it because it's fun
neopet 8y ago
On a separate note, has this sub changed the definition of "field report"?
BluepillProfessor 8y ago
Yah, this is Red Pill theory- or MGTOW porn.
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SinisterSwindler 8y ago
agreed, this is precisely why I cheated on my ex.
jb_trp 8y ago
Agreed. We don't need a male hamster here. Men cheat because we like sex with women... And at least we're honest about it. No "victimhood mentality," no lack or personal responsibility, etc.
BluepillProfessor 8y ago
He is looking at it from the Beta Husbands low sex point of view. Beta husbands in low sex marriages cheat because they crave sex, period. Variety is not even on their view screen.
Alpha guys cheat because of lack of variety. Beta guys don't have enough sex to appreciate variety. If you throw a beat up, fat mottled, rotted steak to a dog he will attack it, vomit it up, and then return to his vomit and eat it again and again. It is the same thing in marriage.
NiceKicksGabe 8y ago
When you consider the fact that alpha males should be the only ones breeding and that polygamy is embedded in history, sexual variety from the male's side makes sense.
[deleted] 8y ago
You are making the mistake that all men think like you do. There are married men out there perfectly happy with sex with the same woman for 20 years, provided they are getting sex. Sure there are cheaters out there for the reasons you said, but the idea that men cheat in general because they crave variety I think is inaccurate. They cheat because they aren't getting some at home. The sad fact is that it's probably the man's fault and he doesn't even know it.
B_uckets 8y ago
Those are the guys who couldn't cheat even if they wanted to
slay_it_forward 8y ago
No, that would suggest they are alpha enough for their wives to want to keep fucking them meaning they could bone others with some effort.
That's the point people are missing. Pussy generally doesn't land in man's lap like cock does for women. Sure a guy might crave variety but if he's getting his balls drained properly at home from a woman he loves and is highly attracted to, there won't be much motivation to scratch that itch. Requires too much effort.
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Overkillengine 8y ago
Excitement is just another drug.
If you aren't selling it to her, someone else is.
Edit to add Corollary:
One should trust them [Dopamine/excitement addicts] as much as one would any other drug junky. Would you give a coke addict access to your financial resources?
No?
Exactly.
Batou_Red 8y ago
One of my favorite expressions for this is "dopamine addict". These are the girls who are constantly on their phone, tinder, and looking for any other sources of validation. Their weakness? Silence of any sort. It will make them squirm and squeal with discomfort to recognize any sort of introspection.
Redasshole 8y ago
I spent the summer to a friends' house. She is around 30 and married to a successful businessman. Two kids, beautiful house, thanks to her husband's connections she regularly enjoys free week-end in castles and things like that. The only thing she has to do is to cook dinner, they share the cleaning and taking care of the kids. The husband is blue pill but not full beta. He isnt a pusdy wipped mangina and his wife shows respect when people are around. She has the perfect life. You can see that she is bored though. I wonder if she is going yo do something stupid. Well, no, i wonder what exactly she is going to do
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[deleted] 8y ago
My mom (late 50's) is visiting me and while browsing facebook, just said, "Why are all the women my age sluts?" Mom, they were always sluts, but now they care even less about societal standards and love flaunting on social media for attention.
totorox 8y ago
Late 50s... that's born in the 1955-1960 bracket... teenagers between 68 and 73. Gee, I wonder why...
Boovs4life 8y ago
You should've commented that on her post
sub178 8y ago
kicking the beehive is not the plan, stan
Metalgear222 8y ago
Saw it today on the beach. Multi million dollar home on the beach, stay at home hot mommy is looking towards the ocean from her balcony with a sad look on her face. Walks out on the shoreline, stands there for 30 minutes checking out every last guy that walks past her. She gives up and turns to head back inside, I catch a glimpse of easily a 20k diamond wedding ring.
Call me crazy, but I'm willing to bet I know what would of happened if I approached her.
[deleted] 8y ago
I'm a former college athlete and train kids on weekends. Most of the parents I deal with are moms. You would not believe how they talk shit about their husbands when they aren't around, about as clear of an IOI as you can get. This happens even with wives of guys I pegged as Alphas. These hoes ain't loyal, especially the married ones.
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screamingATtrees 8y ago
"teach women not to get bored and cheat" #yesallwomen
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[deleted] 8y ago
Yep. That's why you never marry no matter how rich you are. The hot woman you want to bang and keep her around is hot because she knows the game. Rich guys thinking they can keep their prize at home are delusional.
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[deleted] 8y ago
Married women always required constant emotional stimulation. Nowadays they require constant supervision because of the perfect storm of open hypergamy, peer pressure from fellow members of the YOLO sisterhood and the elevation of female feelz as one of the primary goals of modern Western society.
Too bad kids have to be involved. As the saying goes, when a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
TheReformist94 8y ago
Women are inherently dishonest in their sexual strategy,we have to constantly jump through hoops to stop them straying,to keep their shit hollow conditional love which isn't love anyway,yet remain faithful when other options present themselves.my fucking arse am I agreeing to that! What's in it for me ! They leave us know choice but to take a mistress. SEXUAL STRATEGY IS AMORAL.
Magnum256 8y ago
Either peer pressure or envy/jealousy. They hear the gossip about how their 47 year old peer seduced some 27 year old shredded Adonis and think to themselves, "why the hell am I not getting that too!? It'll be so fun to tell all my girlfriends about the experience I have!"
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NightwingTRP 8y ago
So true. And it's such a sad state of affairs that these women risk the upbringing and emotional stability of their children simply because they're bored. So pathetic.
Nycredpilldad 8y ago
Dread gamed my 6 yr LTR & caught her out there dumping the kids on a babysitter when I came home from work unexpectedly. She lied till blue in the face until I found what I was looking for on her phone.
She trickle truthed until finally she admitted it. Then checked email/fb & found even more damning evidence EVEN after she pruned and deleted.
She was unable to pair bond, too much cocaine & angel dust during her cc days.
I knew it would end like this. She would never turn to me, and I stopped being nice after catching her talking shit about me to her gf's (who routinely cheat on their husbands & kids)
For the sake of the kids I would have tried anything, but now they haven't seen me in 5 weeks because mommy can't think logically about the consequences of her actions.
Don't get me wrong, I knew hard dread game might lead to this, and my situation has drastically improved since, but my damn kids deserved a better outcome.
MotchGoffels 8y ago
How did you manage to lose your kids? I can't imagine losing my daughter. Joint physical/legal custody, lawyered up the moment she left.
pardonmeimdrunk 8y ago
Their circle of friends can provide a little more than a hint of what she's likely to do.
Nycredpilldad 8y ago
I warned her & her friends that this behavior would bite them in the ass. I knew that if she was close to these women it was just a matter of time till I got the same treatment. Unfortunately for her, I put her on blast with her friends & family & she looks like a fucking dunce while I'm out doing my thing.
Red flags & past behavior will definitely tell you who you are dealing with if you don't ignore it.
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[deleted] 8y ago
I like that saying
An_All-Beef_Engineer 8y ago
force what exactly? An unplanned pregnancy?
StraightGlueWater 8y ago
Yes. It forces a showing of everyone's hands at the table.
Oh, and it conveniently makes her the center of a soap opera drama.
An_All-Beef_Engineer 8y ago
That's insane, but rings true.
giving the attention drug that is craved.
StraightGlueWater 8y ago
What girl doesn't want to be the center of a hurricane that ruins multiple lives?
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[deleted] 8y ago
I took control and know exactly what is going on with wifey today.
The post isn't about her
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[deleted] 8y ago
Don't, I wasnt clear enough
Overkillengine 8y ago
One of the premises is that the only person one has true control over is oneself- everyone else, one has to provide incentives, which also means accepting that it will not always work.
That being said, I personally would not stay married to a woman that was unfaithful barring some sort of extenuating circumstances (children can count as this) but even then I'd be focusing on mitigating those circumstances as much as I reasonably could in order to cut her loose.
Fir3start3r 8y ago
/u/Overkillengnine is right.
Control is an illusion.
The only person you can truly control is yourself!
[deleted] 8y ago
Even that is a struggle most of the time.
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Overkillengine 8y ago
Sometimes it is wiser in the long run to observe and covertly plan an exit strategy. Bothering to care runs into over-investing in someone that checked out long ago.
Maybe back in older times, where marriage did not involve abdicating the majority of socioeconomic power that a man has, as well as society removing the stigma and consequences of infidelity for women, the direct approach was more workable.
Now is not then.
[deleted] 8y ago
Now is not then is the understatement of a century.
Have a point
[deleted] 8y ago
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Overkillengine 8y ago
Ah, I think we are using different definitions of "involved" in this context.
I interpreted involved as direct engagement. Which is not something that will work out well without it being a legal avalanche, started without forewarning, on his terms, not hers.
Now, keeping an eye on things, subtle fact checking and the such? Not "involved". Merely observation and verification.
[deleted] 8y ago
Op is going in eyes wife open. Lawyerd up, has a map for getting full custody and avoiding divorce rape. It's not beta validation sex, he followed through on fuck me, or fuck you... Just one of the few that went with the latter. And if he's planned well enough, he will have his kids, and his money, and a magical moment where he kicks her out ah me never had to speak to her again.
Until then he's enjoying life, getting in better shape, and demoted her to plate status. Though he's never mentioned touching her again... Which would make sense... Some say a judge would see that as forgiveness or some such.
There's a reason there's only three hard core red in here... He's playing for blood, and he's playing to win.
Most should keep that in mind when they are talking about how they still fear their wives reactions ... He's literally on dread level 11, the one bluepillprofessor says were largely an absurd exaggeration.
Actually, I'm not sure how overt this all is. Can't remember who knows what in his life... Not that it matters.
I'll vouch for the boredom. I'm finding my map to mirror this sentiment entirely. In fact, the one way I know I'm getting awesome "all included sex" is when she's pissed at me to the point of tears.
It's like every the months I have to methadone a main event.
Not a bad thing, it's just strangely consistent
[deleted] 8y ago
Thanks for that. I sleep with my wife all the time, what else is she good for?
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[deleted] 8y ago
It's like I told you on your hard core red post... This shit gives me inspiration boners, 100% pragmatism, 0 ego protection bullshit
BluepillProfessor 8y ago
If your boring...
She's whoring.
[deleted] 8y ago
IMO - Dread game is the most important thing in LTR's. Not intentional, harmful dread - just increasing SMV as a way of life:
Also - someone used the term "frame maintenance" here at some point. You'll see your friends gradually lose it (if they ever had it) over the course of like 3 years, then it's over. Check your frame often.
Temptationn 8y ago
Some days I go beta and I can tell my gf starts to get distant so I start a fight with her and no contact her for a day or 2 after that she's all over me again like we first met sadly this is almost a monthly routine and sometimes I find her starting a fight just so I can cut contact for a day it's like she craves it. I get my phone blown up the whole day.
[deleted] 8y ago
Yup. Had to do that with my ex too.
Then three years in I got too comfy, and she opened me up, she became my best friend and I ended up needing her.
That's when she became my ex. :(
The worst part is that I knew this would happen, but I just had too much fucking hope that she was different from other women. They never are.
[deleted] 8y ago
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_raisin 8y ago
you're telling me. I bought some sex toys online last night and I'm surprise the wife on Wednesday.
[deleted] 8y ago
so you're fuckin the wife and others?
i nod in smug approval
KissTheBridesmaid 8y ago
Indeed. This is what the ‘happy wife, happy life’ mantra does to relationships. Married women can get away with treating their husbands as 3rd class citizens. They get whatever they demand, constantly berate him and belittle him and he still treats her like a queen.
This is what relationships around me look like. Husbands are simply not holding their women accountable for their bad behaviour. They face no consequences. Why wouldn’t they think they can have it all? A husband who works and provides, often does what little housework there is to be done, kids are off at school or taken care of by a maid.
They have fuck all to do, and women are terrible at entertaining themselves, they need a man for this. And so they will find a way to get shafted by men they consider attractive i.e. NOT their husband. That guy is less attractive than the family dog at this point.
[deleted] 8y ago
As biological creatures humans evolved to reproduce at very young ages. The idea that the majority of women live into their 30s, 40s, and 50s is rather recent in the greater scope of humanity. As teenagers their ability to find a healthy mate and get pregnant is pretty good. Just about all of our great x5 grandmothers and beyond were teen moms. So the ability for a young woman to find the best dude she can, or somehow make herself more attractive than the other women is pretty solid.
However, the programming women have in their 40s is sort of a wildcard. It is a new phenomena and it doesn't matter if it doesn't serve them well. Humans generally didn't live this long so there was no need to develop a mindset that is comfortable with age. Many women still have that built in teenage drive of "MUST HAVE A FUCKING BABY RIGHT NOW!".
For a woman, if you keep yourself fit, avoid being a batshit cunt, and fuck regularly you will most likely not have a dude leave you. Can't cook? No big deal. Not good with money. Not a huge deal. Can't get a job. No big deal. If you just keep yourself attractive, pleasant to be around, throw some sex the dude will never leave. Unless he is mental and somehow thinks he will not get divorce raped or thinks he has hot women on the side, he will not leave.
I am in my early 30s, the advise my father and his friends (in their mid 50s) all throw out, the absolute easiest women to pick up aren't single women. They aren't women who are impressed by money. They aren't young women wanting some super alpha. They are women who are in absolutely miserable marriages. Dating a married woman who is miserable is easier than anyone else.
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primatepicasso 8y ago
What if I took her virginity? And im pretty rp at 19?
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BluepillProfessor 8y ago
What if you read the misandry bubble ----->>>>