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- Hide Preview | 57 Comments | submitted 3 days ago by Self-honest [Post Locked]

For those of you out there agonizing over the insane amounts of the new information you have learned from the wellspring of Red Pill knowledge, posting in askTRP about a specific girl you want to put your penis inside (be it an ex, or a “plate” or a girl you haven’t even touched yet); the details don’t matter, there is one rule to follow....

Polarize the situation and force her to action

If you feel like a girl is attempting to use you for your attention and good feelz without any desire for a sexual interaction, this one simple move will answer all of your questions and should inform all of your decisions moving forward with that particular woman.

It’s so easy.

No more long nights spent debating whether it’s was a shit test, or a comfort test, or beta bait, or who is in who’s frame.

No need to tell internet strangers your recounting of the details of the interaction to see if someone can tell you if you still have a chance with one specific girl.

Don’t want to be a beta orbiter? Don’t want to be an emotional tampon? Don’t want to be a girl’s gay best friend?

Want to lay some pipe or move on?

Just polarize the situation and force her into action

Women communicate covertly, through actions not words.

The medium is the message.

Pay attention to what they do, not what they say.

No man of value wants to waste endless amounts of precious time on some girl who has no intention of ever putting out.

But how do you know?

Here’s a little story from a long time ago:

I have an ex that I haven’t seen in over 10 years. We were off and on for years as the power dynamic shifted back and forth. She had oneitis, I had oneitis, we were kids learning life the hard way.

She is now married with two kids.

She has continued to contact me periodically over the years in somewhat the same manner as when we were together, then broken up (as she rode the CC and kept me on the back burner as her “best friend” who she “will always love”).

As I became Red Pilled 4 years ago, I stopped responding to her once in a blue moon pings, because who the fuck wants to dig through the trash? The hard next/ghosting is so much better.

Over the past year her 11pm messages of “hi” then “hi how are you?” then “hey how’s it going?”, “hey” etc. had steadily increased to a level of at least once per week.

Did she not realize I was never going to respond? What is she going for here?

As the late night frequency was increasing, I grew annoyed and curious and I had the thought (as most men would) that maybe she was looking for some extramarital dick.

Or at least was open to a good fucking.

Either way I was ready for the pinging to stop (kids this is why you block your exes everywhere).

So I engaged her and had a quick back and forth to test the waters.

Disclaimer: I am currently in an LTR with a sweet girl who I enjoy fucking. I am also gaming other girls and will fuck other girls if and when my needs aren’t being met. I’m also kind of sadistic and was toying around with the concept of polarization as she was relentlessly reaching out almost out of nowhere.

New women are always better.

That being said...

She told me she was in our home town visiting her mom while the kids stayed home with their dad.

Interesting...

A perfect opportunity to fool around without the husband in the picture. Was she hinting at sex? Is she just contacting me out of boredom and looking to waste my time?

I live out of town but the potential for crossing paths over the holidays is there, and as I was already growing tired of talking to someone I’m not currently fucking, I decided to go ahead and polarize the situation to see what’s what.

“Nice, we should get together one night next time we’re both in town.”

For those of you who don’t understand covert communication, I said “It was nice talking to you, don’t bother hitting me up anymore unless you want to fuck”

She went cold.

She knew exactly what I said, and there are no signs of life.

It’s been months without a word.

What was once her endlessly texting me “Hey how are you?” at midnight every few days to a week and me not responding, turned into her not even responding to a “friendly” offer to hang out.

Boom. Answer achieved. Peace restored. Any further interaction without her leading with a place and time to meet up would be an utter waste of time and will be ignored.

No need to debate the details. No need to spend time keeping the thread going with her in hopes of banging one out.

Just more free time to spend pursuing other naughty adventures with new and exciting females.

If she wants to fuck she will act. If she doesn’t she won’t.

Faint heart never fucked fair lady. Fortune favors the bold.

The fortune you seek is the best ROI and bang for your buck. Good sex for a minor investment is solid.

Not wasting valuable time is a fortune much greater.

This post is long, but I achieved my mission in about 15 minutes of spaced out texting.

No analysis necessary for decision making or action.

No askTRP post about this one special girl.

No more annoying pings.

PLUS the potential for a no effort incoming Christmas booty call.

Life is good. Life is easy.

Polarize and walk away.

[-] _do_not_read_this_ 18 Points 3 days ago

Basic decision tree.

a/k/a put up or shut up

a/k/a fish or cut bait

a/k/a ...

https://www.yesware.com/blog/get-to-no/

[-] Self-honest 3 Points 3 days ago

Yep. This shit applies everywhere.

[-] boy_named_su 3 Points 2 days ago

I'm a "shit or get off the pot" kinda guy

[-] [deleted] 3 days ago
[-] assa_ssin 17 Points 3 days ago

Nice post.

Thanks for sharing your experience - AWALT.

I had similar experiences - worldwide women behave like this.

I succumbed to a hot one and answered out of curiosity after I haven't heard from her for years. Guess what - She asked for a favor.

I cut her immediatelly and I was straight and asked her that I was in need for a BJ. She politely declined and never called me again.

I don't like to waste time so I decided to be straight with women long ago.

[-] Self-honest 12 Points 3 days ago

Hahahaha

I was in need of a bj

Oh buddy I’m rolling. This is correct.

[-] jamiew86yooooo 3 Points 2 days ago

I've had the exact same thing happen to me.

Long time hottie reached out to me after a long time of no communication; she needed a "favour". I said I needed a BJ as well. She didn't respond and I moved on with my life.

[-] [deleted] 2 days ago
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[-] Dynamiteboy13 14 Points 3 days ago

I think she just wanted to get you to invite her and have that satisfaction, you gave in and you did. Not sure if you were quite as successfully covert as you think.

[-] Self-honest 20 Points 3 days ago

The point was to frame the interaction on my terms. Sex or silence, either is fine.

I think she just wanted to get you to invite her and have that satisfaction

Of course. That doesn’t effect me though.

That’s the point. I framed the interaction on my terms. I want to treat her like a cum dumpster. She wants to use me to validate herself. Classic male/female inter-sexual/personal dynamic.

I set the terms so that if she wants any future validation, she has to meet up and get it physically. She can decide to step into that frame or not.

No effort or investment required from me moving forward.

She proved her intentions by not responding. Now I can go back to ignoring her unless she is specific about meeting up sometime.

[-] Dynamiteboy13 6 Points 3 days ago

I mean couldn’t she just suggest a meet up that is plutonic one nature. Let’s grab coffee? You didn’t really polarize anything with your statement.

[-] Self-honest 13 Points 3 days ago

Nice, we should get together one night next time we’re both in town

She knew exactly what I meant. I mean I’ve fucked this girl hundreds and hundreds of times over the course of many years.

If she thought coffee was in the realm of possibility she would have responded.

I said the code words “get together at night.”

We all know what adults do when they get together at night. No one would ever be ok with their wife or LTR getting together at night with an ex.

It was very clear.

[-] Dynamiteboy13 2 Points 3 days ago

She can always ignore that part of the statement. I think it’s strange you say don’t dig through the trash, but then you are fully open to digging through it with your dick. Overall not a great post imo.

[-] Self-honest 5 Points 3 days ago

Lol. Don’t miss the forest for the trees.

I polarized the interaction she started (texting to cure boredom), by initiating a meet up or walking away. She is of no use to me unless she’s swallowing my loads. By forcing the idea of a rendezvous, I shut down her attempt to use my time for her own entertainment and validation.

I think it’s strange you say don’t dig through the trash, but then you are fully open to digging through it with your dick.

Don’t just be contentious for the sake of argument.

Let me say it again:

Don’t dig through the trash

New women are always better

I’m also kind of sadistic and was toying around with the idea of polarization while she was relentlessly reaching out

Trash digging is a problem for new comers. I’m fine, but it’s still important to state that I’m not recommending people go dig through the trash.

This is TRP, do whatever the fuck you want.

[-] [deleted] 1 Point 2 days ago

[deleted]

[-] Self-honest 1 Point 2 days ago

Haha no. It was a teaching moment I decided to share after reading a bunch of askTRP posts where guys seemed to not know this simple principle was the answer to their inability to move forward in a given situation.

You’re always going to validate a girl by attempting to have sex with her. There is no way around it if you are being bold enough to face rejection by being congruent with your desires.

Continuing to offer that validation without sex is the problem many face here.

A simple solution to their struggles is all I offer.

[-] sherlock98 19 Points 3 days ago

Doesn't matter, he's not desperate

[-] [deleted] 3 days ago
[-] Cabbia451 3 Points 3 days ago

At first I agreed with OP, but you kinda changed my point of view. But I don't think she would go through all that trouble of texting endlessly just to achieve this satisfaction you talked about.

[-] Self-honest 15 Points 3 days ago

She’s just a dumb bored bitch who was probably pinging every ex she’s ever had.

I simply shut it down. If she’s looking for someone’s time to waste I’m sure she’ll find it elsewhere.

Point is, if you want to fuck and don’t want to be someone’s gay best friend orbiter, polarize the situation and stay congruent with your desires, then you’re golden either way. And you save valuable time and emotional energy.

[-] JCX_Pulse 7 Points 3 days ago

I agree. She wanted the attention. Probably wanted to feel hot again and saw you as an easy target. When you clearly weren’t going to give her the validation she wanted for free she cut out.

Very likely had other guys already giving her that attention and validation already.

[-] [deleted] 3 days ago
[-] Whitefarmer 1 Point 2 days ago

Polarizing moment in my relationship was I straight up said “ yes or no I’m no woman’s plan B “ she was pissed and blah blah so I’m just some woman to you blah blah I can do what I want. I said “ yes or no” then the silent treatment. I said get hot looking I’ll pick you up in 15 lol

[-] Self-honest 1 Point 2 days ago

Yep. She just needs to know FOR SURE what you’re all about and who you are.

Well done.

[-] PepeLePunk 13 Points 3 days ago

Just say “No” to being “friends”.

[-] Self-honest 16 Points 3 days ago

“I’ve already got enough friends, thanks”

[-] PepeLePunk 10 Points 3 days ago

“I’m looking for ‘Friends with Benefits’, nothing less.”

[-] Self-honest 11 Points 3 days ago

Lol for the sake of discussion I’m going to call this one a little cringe as a response to the LJBF shit test.

The move isn’t one where you’re negotiating, because as we all know you can’t negotiate attraction. The move is you walking away and then her coming after you and entering your sexual framing of the relationship.

Added bonus: if you are breaking up with someone or being broken up with, always say yes to just being friends and then never contact them or respond again/block everywhere.

[-] ebaymasochist 3 Points 2 days ago

"What do you have to offer that makes you a good friend? My friends are way cooler than you."

[-] Self-honest 2 Points 2 days ago

Exactly. It’s not friends with benefits, but rather sex with an added friendship component if you qualify.

You want that friendship without the sex part, you have to actually be bringing something substantial to the table.

[-] TXJohn83 5 Points 2 days ago

An emotional tampon is such a great description of how so many nice guys end up.

[-] Self-honest 2 Points 2 days ago

Cliches are cliche for a reason

[-] Whitefarmer 3 Points 2 days ago

Polarize the situation and force her into action!!! Delete the sidebar FFS I learned this very early in the rebpill and you literally own her. If you can say absurd shit with a straight face and not break frame you win every time

[-] Self-honest 1 Point 2 days ago

Understanding the stuff is good, but the whole game is results based. Sidebar is solid. Digest it and internalize it.

This is a good way to filter for time wasters vs those who are genuinely interested in getting their hands on what’s in your pants.

[-] MilkMoney111 3 Points 3 days ago

I found this to be a HUGE time saver. My most valuable asset is my time. If I get a hint I’m being drug along for attention or validation, I make my intentions known. Not reciprocated? Great, on to the next. The point is I saved time and a headache over analyzing her behavior.

[-] [deleted] 3 days ago
[-] alex61679 3 Points 3 days ago

What a good read

I will learn from this

[-] [deleted] 2 days ago
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[-] SafeBendyStraw 2 Points 3 days ago

Holy fucking balls I needed to hear that. Thanks, king.

[-] [deleted] 3 days ago
[-] 4LW4YS0NG34R 2 Points 2 days ago

Amen.

Thanks for the knowledge.

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[-] RedGille 1 Point 2 days ago

thanks for the post.

It's indeed a bothering question: when to pursue a new contact (or and old one for that matter) and when to cut your losses.

for me, the magic number is 2.

2 messages to a new girl. no response? bye.

2 offers to meet a never ending text friend. Not available? bye.

And so on. The second one is just for good measure, to make sure I am not missing anything. You can replace 2 with another number. Just make sure it can be counted on one hand lol.

[-] Self-honest 1 Point 2 days ago

As long as your intentions are clear and you know how to read covert communication, your decision making should be on point.

[-] mr_Tobbor 1 Point 3 days ago

These days, texting is everything, for guys and girls. Guys amuse themselves. Seeing nude photos. Sexting. That's all. Why bother with real meat? That is an answer for the mediocre comments here.

[-] [deleted] 2 days ago
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[-] Redditorsheaven 1 Point 2 days ago

This could be rational for you. But I will disagree. Looked like you have grown anger and wanted to revenge in a hard way. Because I have been in a similar situation like you. Maybe you have done low value things such as to much push in the past that she did not attracted to you in a high level, so she decided to be friendish. Later on, as she wanted to write you again, you wanted to revenge because of the anger you have developed. I do not blame you, as you have said you both were learning life in a hard way, it is good for you.

[-] Self-honest 2 Points 2 days ago

I’m far past that. I could care less about her. Just illustrating the point about not wasting time getting to your answer.

[-] theologyofthebody 0 Points 2 days ago

LOL way to let her take the lead

[-] Self-honest 1 Point 2 days ago

What lead are you referring to?

[-] [deleted] 0 Points 3 days ago

[deleted]

[-] Self-honest 2 Points 3 days ago

What’s really upsetting you?

I know you’re not really just mad at me for breaking my post up in a style I think is more easily digestible than a wall of text.

That would just be a ridiculous and irrelevant thing to attack someone for.

There must be something else bothering you.