I'm subbed to shitreditsays. I originally thought this sub was a comedy sub, because all the posts were so funny. It took me a while to start reading the comments and realize that they were posting this content not because they thought it funny, but because they were so offended they had to find some like minded snowflakes to agree with them.
Anyway, that's not the point of this post. The point is they posted this link:
Which is a fun read. The short of it is that two idiots are in a relationship for 2.5 years with no sex, the man breaks up with her, and then she bangs some creep at work 3 days later.
The woman's perspective:
The man's perspective (my summary):
Obviously sex wasn't that important since you just gave it away immediately to some stranger. So why did you string me along for all these years? Dumb hoe. I'm going to tell all my friends and have a good cry and ruin your reputation.
The comments of this thread are honestly a shit show. Half are "YTA" (you're the asshole) and the other half are "NTA" (not the asshole) as everybody tries to figure out who's at fault, but nobody can pinpoint what the hell happened. It seems to me as if men are siding with the man and women are siding with the woman. Typical. Where do you stand? Can you piece it together? Do you see yourself anywhere in this story?
Let me lay it out for you, because there's a good lesson. Essentially both people are idiots. You can protect yourself by:
A) Control the relationship and do it on your terms. Know your needs, know your rules, and know your partner.
B) Don't date children
What the man did wrong:
The guy clearly had his own sexual needs and did not properly represent them. This lead to a lot of pent up frustration, which resulted in his inevitable "explosion" which shocked and confused the girl (he was always so nice, I don't get it). The root cause of failure for the man is weakness. He was too afraid to make his needs known. Had it been me, I would have broken up with her when it became clear she had an unsolvable sexual hangup. Sex is very important to me and I'm not going to bottle all those feelings up into a resentment bomb and then unleash them later. Read your woman. Chances are if you're dating the idiot in this story you will find out before you even have to waste an hour on her that she's a total ditz who can't figure anything in her life out.
What the woman did wrong:
The girl, on the other hand, didn't realize any of this either. Her failure is pure negligence. She was neglectful to consider her partner's feelings. She was neglectful to consider her own feelings. She hoped that if she ignored all of it long enough the problem would somehow magically solve itself. It's possible she has some sort of trauma associated with sex, or at the very least she clearly doesn't understand it and needs to evolve in her understanding. Unfortunately she experimented in doing so only after it cost her everything.
None of us should be surprised by the reaction of Reddit, of course, because Reddit is full of men just like the guy in the story. "Nice guys" that are willing to forego themselves for a clueless woman who doesn't know any better. The story offends Reddit because many people on here are also very weak and have the same story. It invokes the trauma they've felt in previous relationships.
The moral of this story:
1) Represent your interests. Make them known. If the girl won't play by your rules, then GOOD. Now you don't have to waste 2.5 years on her and can move on immediately and find one who will. It's sexy to know what you want. Chances are that bitch woulda put out anyway if he had been firmer with his demands.
2) Get educated. Know how the world works. That way if you want to date a girl like in the story (your funeral), you'll be able to fix her warped perspective on sex. Once you reframe sex as "not a big deal" to her, then she'll put out. Better yet, use those brains to attract a non-broken woman.