Happy Saturday everyone. Today back with a little less dense summary of Chapter 4 of Laws of Human Nature. Determine The Strength of People's Character: The Law of Compulsive Behaviour

TL;DR Video Summary: https://youtu.be/zTUFKpJ3cnk

Written Summary:

When choosing people to work and associate with, don’t be mesmerized by their reputation or taken in by the image they try to project. Train yourself to look deep within them and see their character. People’s character is formed in their early years and daily habits. It’s what compels them to repeat certain actions in their lives and fall into negative patterns. Look closely at these patterns and remember that people never do something just once.

Gauge strength of character by: How well they handle adversity, ability to work with other people, patience and ability to learn. Always gravitate to those who display strength.

Know thoroughly your own character, so you can break your compulsive patterns, and take control of your destiny.

“Character is destiny” - Heraclitus.

Keys to Human Nature

Nobody likes to believe that we are operating under some kind of compulsion that’s out of our control. But we are prone to repeat the same decisions and methods of dealing with problems.

There’s a recognizable pattern in our life, particularly in our mistakes and failures.

We can conceive of this character having three central components that gives our character depth.

Genetics: our earliest and deepest layer. Makes some people prone to depression, greed, introverts vs extroverts.

Formative years: from our earliest years and relationships with mothers and caregivers. The stamp left by these first 3-4 years leaves a deep impression on who we are to become.

Habits and Experiences: the first two layers will have us relying on certain strategies for dealing with stress, looking for pleasure or handling people. These strategies now become habits that are set.

We are compelled to repeat this way of behaving because the path is already laid. It becomes a habit and our character is formed out of these thousands of habits.

There is a fourth layer as well. Often developed in late childhood and adolescence as people become aware of their character flaws. They do what they can to cover it up.

They put on a front to disguise these character flaws.

Without conscious effort our strengths can wear down or become weaknesses. The weakest parts of our character are the ones that create habits and compulsive behavior because they do not require effort or practice to maintain.

Your task is 2-fold:

  • You must come to understand your own character. Examining as best you can the elements in your past that have gone into forming it, and the patterns, mostly negative, that you can see recurring in your life. Work to transform the negative or weak aspects of your character into actual strengths, you can try to create new habits that go with them out of practice. Actively shaping your character and the destiny that goes with it.
  • You must develop your skill in reading the people that you deal with. Consider character as a primary value when choosing someone to work for or with, or an intimate partner. This means giving it more value than charm, intelligence or reputation. The ability to discern peoples character as seen through their actions is an absolutely critical social skill.

Character Signs

  • The most significant indicator of people’s character come through their actions over time. Despite what they say in terms of changes, youll inevitably see the same actions repeating over the course of their life. Take notice of any salient forms of behavior: disappearing when there’s too much stress, not completing important pieces of work, turning belligerent when challenged or conversely, rising to the challenge when given some responsibility. Do some research into their past and look at their actions not as isolated incidents but as part of a compulsive pattern. The primary corollary of this law: People never do something just once. “Like a dog who returns to his vomit, is a fool that repeats his folly” Bible quote

If someone is forgetful and inattentive on smaller matters, they will be the same with bigger ones. If they’re late with simple assignments they’ll be late with larger projects.

In everyday life people can often do well at disguising their character flaws, but in times of stress or crisis, these flaws can be suddenly apparent.

There’s no way to tell how people will react until they’re under fire, but you must pay attention in such moments. They could rise to the occasion or they could crumble. How people handle power and responsibility will tell you a lot about them.

Strong character has a tensile quality. It can give or bend, but still retains it’s overall shape and never breaks. Strength emanates from a feeling of personal security and self worth. Allows people to take criticism and learn from their mistakes. They don’t give up easily since they want to learn how to get better. Open to new ideas and ways of doing things without compromising the basic principles they adhere to. In adversity they can retain their presence of mind. Can handle chaos and unpredictability. They’re reliable. Can subsume their personal interests for the good of the group. Complete what they start.

People of weak character are easily overwhelmed by circumstances, making them hard to rely upon. Slippery and evasive. They cannot be taught because learning from others implies criticism. They may appear to listen to instructions but will revert back to what they think is best.

We are all a mix of good and bad qualities but everyone leans in one or the other direction. As much as you can, work with strong characters and avoid weak ones.

The superior character - the law is simple and inexorable. You have a set character that predates your conscious awareness. From deep within you this character compels you to repeat certain actions, strategies and decisions. Once you think and take a particular action, a neural pathway is formed that takes you to do it again and again.

In relation to this law, you can go in one of two directions. Each one more or less determining the course of your life.

  1. Ignorance and denial - don’t take notice of the patterns in your life or accept that your early years left a deep and lasting imprint that compels you to act in certain ways. You imagine your character is plastic and that you can recreate yourself at will. The concept of a set character can seem like a prison. You cannot move against the grain of your character or wish it away. It is too powerful.
  2. Examine yourself as thoroughly as possible - Determine whether you’re an introvert or extrovert, whether you’re governed by high anxiety or hostility, or a profound need to engage with people. Look at the subjects and activities you are naturally drawn to. Look with rigorous honesty at your own mistakes and the patterns of behavior that continually hold you back. Know your limitations. Become aware of the natural strengths in your character that have survived passed adolescence.

Accept and embrace your character. The desire isn’t to become someone else, but to be more thoroughly yourself. Realizing your true potential, see your character as the clay that you will work with. You do not run away from your flaws, but rather see them as a true source of power.

Refine those traits that go into making a strong character.

  • Resilience under pressure
  • Attention to detail
  • Ability to complete things
  • To work with a team
  • Be tolerant of peoples differences

This is the alchemy you must use on yourself.

The only way to do so is to work on your habits. Which go into the slow formation of your character. In boring everyday tasks, cultivate patience and attention to detail. Deliberately take on tasks slightly above your level. Train yourself to continually think of what is best for the team. Search out others who display a strong character and associate with them as much as possible to assimilate their energy and habits. Occasionally shake yourself up and try out a new strategy or way of thinking, doing the opposite of what you’d normally do.

With such work you’ll no longer be a slave to the character created by your earliest years and the compulsive behavior it leads to. You can now actively shape your character and the fate that goes with it.

In anything it’s a mistake to think one can behave in a certain way once and no more. What one does, one will do again. Has already done in the distant past.

People of real strength are as rare as gold. And if you find them you should respond as if you discovered a treasure.

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