Boutique Hotel Bar
I’m late 30s, 6’ 185 sixpack, lift, good style, red pill for 3 years. Previous boyfriend material beta serial monogamist. Frame and game have been weak areas.
Read Mode One and watched Craig Ferguson.
The lobby bar had a DJ and was high energy. I felt anxiety walking in. I reminded myself that I’m too self-important and nobody is watching me.
I walked to the bar and saw a 2 set. My anxiety was high and they were in set with another guy. I ordered a drink and bailed to my room, not wanting to be lurking around all night.
In the room I sipped my drink, watched more Craig Ferguson and tried to quell my anxiety.
An hour later I headed back down. The bar was way more crowded. I went to the side of the bar an and ordered a drink. A cute, short 6 moved into my space. She opened me about it being smart to order from the side. I was social and flirty with her. We ended up having some things in common. I wonder if I could have pulled her right then? I bailed the set and told her I was solo and may bump into her and her friends later.
I angled back into the center bar and saw the original 2 targets. I made eye contact with one, moved off, then approached 30 seconds later. It was probably a weak move. Regardless, I opened, they flirted. The cute one said she had a boyfriend. I disregarded. Later I brought it back up. Failed shittest. I moved off and back a couple of times. The hot one was into me and asked if I judged her and her friend. Another shittest. We tried to dance. I was not feeling it. I walked off, walked back. She said “look whose back.” She was toying with me at that point, so I bailed.
I moved off, felt rejected. Thought about tail between my legs bailing to the room. I shook it off, stood my ground and ordered a drink. I was in a high traffic spot, back to the bar.
A 6 and her 5 friend come to order. I say “hey” the 6 says “hey” back with some sarcasm. Without interest. Her boyfriend pulls her out 30 seconds later. I chat the 5. I was not interested.
Set breaks, a skinny guy and his girl walk up and order. She’s 22 solid 7.5. The bartender says the skinny guy is cut off. I joke about how hard they are in this place. I catch his girl checking me out. I get eye contact and smirk. They move off.
A pretty faced fat girl comes and chats me up. Her face is actually not bad and her skin is glowing. She is definitely ripe, but she would have 100lbs on every other girl I’ve been with and 20 on me. I can’t do it. I break set.
The first girl to open me comes back. We flirt. I meet her friends. Two of her friends go to buy a drink and say “it’s our friend’s birthday, can you believe nobody has bought her a drink?” I say, “you’re angling for a drink aren’t you?” She doesn’t deny it. I tell her I don’t buy drinks for people I just met. She is a short haired feminist. She buys her drink.
I’m chatting with her friend, who I’m considering fucking, then the feminist cockblocks and says “we don’t like this guy,” I say, “you’re just mad I didn’t buy you a drink.” They all break set. This is clearly some failed shittesting.
So, I ordered one more drink posted up. They make last call. I’m considering the fat girl, but can’t do it. I decide to head to my room in five minutes. Then, skinny guy and girl show back up. Skinny guy just wants a water. The bartender still won’t serve him. I joke and say “everyone here is an asshole. Where I’m from they want you to drink water.” He asks where I’m from. His girl is in my space and clearly into me. He noticed and says, oh, “you’re from (place I’m from) you definitely fuck.” I say, “yes, I absolutely do,” while smirking at his girl. He breaks set. She stays.
I check her out and make a comment on her outfit. I flirt with her about her eyes. I say who is that guy, your boyfriend? She says no, that their just friends. I look her in the eye and say, “is he going to be mad when you go upstairs with me?” She shrugs her shoulders. I motion my head towards the exit and say follow me and begin to walk. She does.
We get to the room and offer her a drink and she asks why suggesting we should just fuck. I agree and pound town for 20-30 minutes until her friends FaceTime her. She answered. They tell her she is so bad and they all giggle. She puts her clothes on and bails. I hadn’t nutted yet, so I tell her I actually wanted her to stay for a few minutes. She leaves anyway. Haha.
She left her panties. Lol.
I don’t know her name.
Girls are depraved.
Edit: forgot to mention this broad wanted raw dog. Haha. I wore a condom.
WoodWizzy87 5y ago
Here’s the thing you game them all at the same time. One chick will be more into you, make friends with the other. This isn’t rocket science. Make them laugh to break the ice then they know you’re cool.
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chart6653 5y ago
Geez it's tiring just imagining your Field Report. If the goal is just to nut, then why not just hire one of the pros in the bar, sure you're out $300 but I'd say worth the price for 7 hours work the 'old fashioned' way.
Or is it the challenge of developing your game?
innominating 5y ago
The goal is to develop game skills.
chazthundergut 5y ago
Strong work.
I love this field report because it proves that you don't need to be perfect to score. You can fuck up your game, multiple times, and still get laid. Well done.
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enderbeannn 5y ago
I don't know what I'm meant to get from this. There's no lessons and no RP content.
innominating 5y ago
I don’t know what you’re supposed to get from this either.
I have more questions than answers.
I have no lessons to give.
The truths you find are those you seek.
doorpimp 5y ago
logistics had a huge part in this play along with your balls. nicely done.
innominating 5y ago
Definitely built-in logistics. An extremely favorable playing field.
JW_2 5y ago
were you actually staying at the hotel?
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Zech4riah 5y ago
Somebody got onenight standed.
jokuhuna2 5y ago
For me this sounds like a story of a man on the right track but not quiete there yet.
innominating 5y ago
To you and me. I don’t think I’ll ever be quite there.
forever_alpha 5y ago
I was an active part of the Pick-Up Scene for about 6 years. Red Pill since 3 now.
The differences between men who get to the point of not worrying about pussy anymore and those who need to rely on luck are:
Don’t be over-analytical when you’re go into a set. Focus on yourself and YOU having fun. Your mindset should be „is she good enough for me?“. Many things in Pick Up are bullshit - the „you are the prize mindset“ certainly isn’t. By being in the moment (which can’t be achieved by being in your head) you’ll get into a state of flow.
Don’t focus on shittests. Focus on building a solid frame that can’t be shaken. If you have a strong frame you won’t even notice shittests anymore. Trust me.
If you really suffer from approach anxiety the best thing to do is approaching. After many approaches your brain will get used to it and won’t connect approaching strange women to fear anymore. But I guess you knew that already so here is a tip that helped many guys I was teaching back then:
Before you approach a girl imagine you know them already. Just convince yourself that you have already talked to them/ are friends/ whatever.
Think about all the girls you already know (friends, family, ex girlfriends or plates) and try to realize that they are nothing to be afraid of. Just people with their own insecurities.
Until you reached the point of not having to worry about pussy at all; Until you reached the point of not getting hits to your self-esteem whenever you’re being rejected; Until you’ve managed to be completely satisfied with who you are - not financial wise (yes, you can have a good relationship with a hot girl even if you don’t have a lot of money) or looks wise (you don’t have to have reached perfection, there is always room for more improvement. Be comfortable in your skin);
Before you have reached this point - tattoo it on your cheeks, so you can speak it as a mantra whenever you shave your face the morning:
DO NOT EVEN CONSIDER AN EXCLUSIVE RELATIONSHIP.
innominating 5y ago
Thanks buddy, but I found this place after being married 10 years, which is why I have so few approaches and anxiety about them.
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[deleted] 5y ago
Not with that attitude you won't
thebadmanpuntdbaxter 5y ago
Keep running just to stay where you are
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balalasaurus 5y ago
Your story reads more like PUA porn than a TRP field report. That points to the notion that you have yet to internalize RP principles. Your self-importance is cosmetic. I doubt you honestly think you’re as cool as you think you are or portray yourself to be. Can’t fault you on your progress, but if you want lasting results, then you need to stop looking at the resources here as tricks to get you laid, and instead as tools to be a better man. A sidebar refresher is needed imo.
innominating 5y ago
I get your point.
I’m currently working on game, so I’ve been reading the recommended pua books at the expense of rereading the core material, again.
I’m surprised you think I portray myself as cool here. I don’t think I’m cool. I have terrible inner game. Infield I probably project cool as a defense mechanism to mask my insecurity. But, I didn’t try to write this up as cool.
I’ve spend the last 38 years being a better man. I am the better man often enough...and I have no game.
What’s the point of being the better man if you’re nervous as fuck to open a women?
So, I am just trying to get laid right now.
balalasaurus 5y ago
I never said you were cool. I said you aren’t as cool as you think you are. To be honest, I can pick up on your insecurity through your post.
Also your better man comment: I suspect you’re confusing being a better man with being a NiceGuy. The two are not the same and you’d do well to understand the difference.
Your approach now is rough and unrefined and my moneys on the fact that you’re still coming at the game from a point of scarcity. That scarcity is grounded in the fact that deep down you are still a NiceGuy trying to be a better man.
When you’re secure in yourself you won’t be nervous or pedestalize pussy the way you still do. And that comes from letting go of the NiceGuy and becoming the better man.
You’re making progress but you’re letting yourself be caught up in the pua stuff which is, quite frankly, a shortcut. Sex will always be there. The growth that comes from being able to have it and turn it away won’t. You’d do well to figure that out soon.
innominating 5y ago
Right.
I’m not portraying myself as cool.
I don’t think I’m cool.
The point is for everyone, including myself, to pick up on my insecurity in this post.
Of course, every FR is a humble brag of sorts. I would like to say I would have written this up if I didn’t bang, but I wouldn’t have.
Maybe I’ll write up random night night when I flame out.
innominating 5y ago
Fair enough. You’re probably right. NMMNG was definitely the most impactful read for me. I am just trying to get laid right now.
When I say better man I mean more perfect looking, more money providing, more perfect sounding, more nurturing. Yes, basically Mr. Perfect Nice Guy.
Other than re reading NMMNG how do you propose I root out my insecurity and faults and progress from here?
trees_away 5y ago
I promise you, you can get laid. I’m 37. I’m fat. (6’4” 283lbs. Think Dwayne Johnson if he made poor life choices and lacked discipline and had a strong affinity for pastries. But he started lifting now so he’s kinda starting to take on that manly shape. And he grew a really manly, well-manicured beard). Women NEVER open me. I’ve fucked 30+ women in the past year since swallowing the pill. Focus on shoring up your inner game. It’s the most important thing. Confidence and DGaF will charm the pants off a woman just about every time. I’ve gotten to the point of just being bold now. I’m brazen about my sexuality because I’m confident in bed, even with the 6” grower (not shower) that looks comically small to me on my giant body.
Women love how i fuck them. That means I know a secret: she wants to fuck me a second time, she just doesn’t know she wants to fuck me the first time. And also, outcome independence. Get rejected a ton, and eventually you stop fearing it. Like an MMA fighter who’s taken so many punches he no longer flinches. That’s the only way. Then, you stop caring.
Who cares if you fucked up. You’ll fuck up again plenty more times. But you’ll learn each time and improve. Next time you’ll remember to keep things light and not so logical. That’s huge. You’re a baby learning to walk. Taking steps always has the risk of falling when you’ve never used your legs before. But as an adult, you’ve been walking so long it’s as natural as breathing. You’ll get there with women too. And you’ll stop taking it so seriously and just learn to enjoy playing the game for what it is: a game.
cliff7521 5y ago
> They tell her she is so bad and they all giggle.
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Some simp's future wife
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Leykis says that hotel bars are the best places to go.
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innominating 5y ago
Yeah, the fact that she answered the FaceTime naked was shocking to me. She wanted me to raw dog her...depraved.
WeddingCrasher91 5y ago
How do you feel about being late 30s and recently swallowing the pill?
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I turned 27 and just got out of a 1 year abusive marriage that cost me a lot of money. I discovered the redpill months ago, i feel like iam late to the game, not to mention that this relationship has set me back even more
trees_away 5y ago
You’re never to late to the game. I’m 37. Started swallowing the pill last year after my wife of 10 years left me for my best friend and divorce raped me. I was completely hopeless with women. Started reading everything i could get my hands on. Started learning game. Got my T checked and started TRT. started trying to live an interesting life and find a mission.
Now I’m in an OLTR with a 21 yo model. I’m about to follow a life long dream and try to become a rock star. I hang out with young, beautiful women who like to dance around naked in my bedroom and swing on the rope swing above my bed. (For real. I’m about to start a POV sexy reality tv show that is an exaggeration of my life i think. HQ softcore porn basically, with real girls next door. Bloops will eat this shit up cause it’s what they wish their life was like but are too chickenshit to make it happen.) My younger self is so hi-fixing me right now, because my life is starting to look exactly like the kind of life I wanted. I don’t think I ever wanted the white picket fence and 2.5 kids. I’m not cut out for that life. I can’t tolerate mundane or routine for longer than a couple months in most areas of my life.
Age is what you make of it. I hang out with young 20-somethings because it keeps me young and plugged in to culture. I plan to keep dating around this age group for at least the next 10-15 years. Women start to lose their appeal to me at about 25. Go be what you always wanted to be as a kid. Go do the things you’ve never given yourself permission to do out of fear or lack.
I’ll be 40 in 3 years. I’ll be drowning in pussy by then. Wow is me.
Edit: that was supposed to say “woe is me.” I like the typo better.
WeddingCrasher91 5y ago
Enlightening and i hope everyone in my shoes will get the chance to read this. Best luck in your endeavors brethren
innominating 5y ago
It is what it is.
I’m still married with 2 kids.
You have 5-10 years before you even peak. I would trade you.
Son_of_Gatsby 5y ago
Honest question: Do you still live with your wife? Or are you just married on paper
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moreinhoe 5y ago
Great example of the principle that a girl who wants to fuck you will fuck you without much obstacle. Some will make you work for it, but if you up your approach numbers, you can skip the total seduction gymnasium and hit the home runs with the 7.5s and above.
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buttgoogler 5y ago
What are your thoughts on "Mode one"? Ive never managed to finish the book since it didn't speak much to me, but still.
innominating 5y ago
It’s definitely red pill.
Mode One helped me.
I’ve always been really good at LTRs. Which means that I have played good beta game. I wrongly thought women wanted providers types.
I have never tried to be mode one, and rarely if ever had fast hook ups as a result. I thought that women needed way more comfort to fuck. It possible that the women I preselected for LTRs did in fact need way more comfort. But, probably not.
This broad literally talks to me for less than 15 minutes total and didn’t know my name. She was hot enough but definitely not wife material.
HIJKelemenoP 5y ago
Women do want providers...of dick in and around their mouths.
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innominating 5y ago
I want to get good at same day/night lays and cut way down on the 7 hour venue change requirement. Numbers won’t work for me.
Mode one taught me to do that I need to be way more sexual. No brainer.
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innominating 5y ago
Yeah, venue changing works. Especially if you want an LTR.
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innominating 5y ago
You’re probably right. I mean it builds comfort.
Rollo_Mayhem3 5y ago
In some sense, you going to your room mutiple times was a good idea. It's the equivalent of moving around a bar floors or changing spots. You're not the same guy standing there all night. New people come and see you coming in.
In the end, your 2 minutes of being social and holding frame , is what scored you the chick BUT the initial interaction was with the bartender that pulled her in. When u go out alone, those are the little things you have to do... i think you got lucky and capitalized on that. Lesson learned.
Edit: lately the time from meeting to closing has shorten substantially. I use to spend too much time, slowly escalating...now, i just look for ways to immediately sexualize the encounter, if i get little resistance, i move to close, if i get any, i walo away and try another...the only way i pick up with the earlier encounter is if they find a way to get close to me, which i take as a sign that shes now ready
innominating 5y ago
I went to the room to avoid standing around all night with no targets.
The initial encounter was rubbing her tits on me.
I agree this is not an example of expert game.
innominating 5y ago
I was way more social than this reads. I didn’t write up conversations with dudes, or conversations with most of the girls.
Your point is taken that I really only opened one set. I was opened by girls every other time. That is my normal experience. I need to open more.
zestytacoz 5y ago
Do you mean going around being social with anybody?
Rollo_Mayhem3 5y ago
that's important BUT when you are alone, you have to build your status in places by being more than just another consumer. When you develop an acquaintance with the bar staff, they will say hello, good to see you, get drinks quicker, and certainly free drinks and shots from time to time. You can also talk to them in the bar when things are slow. All that adds up. And in the context of girls, they see this, they see that you just walked up and got a beer while they waited or that the bartender gave you a pound (handshake), that gives you status in place that is often dark, loud, and a full of drunk boys... it makes you stand out.
I am not bragging but I no longer pay cover to get into my bar (that goes for my dates), I usually can expect a free beer or two because they either hook me up or forget to charge me, and certainly the can stop and chat here and there when I am scouting out the area.
Also, the owner recognizes me, so one time, when a girl said x, and a cop was outside, he just said, come back next week and the cop felt like I was "kicked out" and he was cool with that. Rare occurrence btw.
redvelvet_oreo 5y ago
Required Reading for your ass:
https://illimitablemen.com/2014/12/14/the-shit-test-encyclopedia/
Glad you pulled man.
Do yourself a favor. Start setting your frame better. On the shit test exam you scored about a 20%. Your game could use work also but start with learning to pass shit tests. You could have number closed and or pulled just about everyone women you spoke to if you did pass and added some teasing and kino. It seems like girls open you more often than not. You have an advantage here use it.
Also if I were you lessen up on the alcohol. Set a limit for yourself if your out to game. 2 Drinks for the night. You can always order a diet soda as a filler drink if you need something in your hand.
innominating 5y ago
I’ve read that 20 times. I haven’t had many reps in the field.
Yes, I get opened by women a lot. I always have. It’s good and bad. Good because I’ve never had a problem getting LTRs. Bad because I have never had to learn to open, because I’ve always been in LTRs.
emdmarco 5y ago
How would you guys handle the shit test he received about buying the drink?
oytrp 5y ago
I usually offer to buy them a water.
Cavannah 5y ago
“Any flavor of tap water your heart desires”
randomTATRP 5y ago
My first thought would be if I hadn't had a drink, I'd say 'Yeah, let me order...', get back with the drink and start drinking it when she'll probably ask about the drink being for her friend and I'd reply 'I said I'd order, not for who though' or sth like that. Proves frame and is asshole-ish, I'd say.
DandBPrime 5y ago
Nah thats too much, you'd look childish.
randomTATRP 5y ago
Doesn't matter if I don't care how I look, doesn't it?
revente 5y ago
I won't buy you a drink but i'll make you breakfast.
innominating 5y ago
I’ll use this sometime. Not with her, because I wouldn’t fuck her.
revente 5y ago
Yeah, if you are not interested why even bother with solving her tests, just ignore and move on.
DadOnDabs 5y ago
So many failed shit tests but still pulled. Lol
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HIJKelemenoP 5y ago
"She is a short haired feminist. She buys her drink."
Yes.
innominating 5y ago
Yeah but she got real hateful about it and cock blocked me. I did not handle her well.
HIJKelemenoP 5y ago
Meh. She has her own mental health issues to deal with. Live and learn.
TheSanctified 5y ago
I would have gotten her a diet coke or made her play rock paper scissors with me. There probably was no right way to handle her.
innominating 5y ago
I should have ignored her from the beginning.
daymi 5y ago
If she has unrealistic expectations (and is manipulative) she's going to hate the one that points them out to her (by you not buying her a drink). There's not a thing you could have done. She felt bad. It's her problem.
I've had the same situation before and beat myself up about it. Remember: They fucked up.
In my case she even returned and wanted to go to another dancing place with me. Seeing how it would probably end up again, I was not enthusiastic about it. Rubbed her the wrong way.
Nowadays what I do is ignore their drink-wanting talk as if they hasn't said anything (change the topic - multiple times, if needed).
But really, it was fine the way you did it. Make sure not to waste your time.
innominating 5y ago
Honestly, I think I handled this really poorly.
I called her out on her manipulation. Which lead to the hateful cockblock. Which killed everybody’s boner.
Had I just STFU and been fun and flirty and played dumb she never would have asked me for a drink. I probably would have ended up fucking her friend had I mustered the motivation and balls to sexualize with a 6.
MrTrizzles 5y ago
Me again. Never, ever ever everevervrevrvvrv say a single negative thing on a first/early date. Never, really, but especially then. Do not agree with someone who makes a negative statement. Do not laugh at a negative joke. 0% negativity.
At the core is this: women will not fuck you if you make them feel bad. Ergo, toss all negativity. Ignore, deflect, change the topic, but never even acknowledge it.
Simple rule, makes it easier to follow it subconsciously.
I’m not saying be positive. She should naturally be feeling good because good is rolling off you, off your physique and style and character. Because you’re a sexual being. If you have good Serious Man game you don’t even need to be positive, either. Just avoid the bad feeling shit. Find my post on this.
haroldpeters 5y ago
so many mistakes.. lucky you go there in the end.. keep working at it.. and get some better indirect openers, and do some research on passing shit tests.. you sound way to nervous and awkward to be putting out alpha vibes... you cant always rely on drunk chicks at the end of the night.
innominating 5y ago
You’re probably right. I read Bang for indirect openers and need to use them more. The one opener I used was situational and worked. The “hey” to the 6 was clearly not enough to open, but I read somewhere if you can think of no opener it’s better than nothing and sometimes the girl helps you out.
I’ve read the shit test encyclopedia and listened to standup but I have more work to do on this.
I’m probably not putting out Alpha vibes. I’ve always gotten away with doing very little, which is the reason I’m working on this skill set.
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Rezi89 5y ago
Really like the honesty in this post. Refreshing.
Did she cum?
Also, have you ever tried CBD oil for anxiety?
innominating 5y ago
I don’t know if she came. I had a condom on and it was vigorous. She acted climatic on multiple occasions, but she may have just been into it. Either way she had fun.
I’ve not tried CBD. I take magnesium which helps.
I have a very quick, active mind. Lifting helps a lot. I need to meditate.
CovetedCodex 5y ago
Thanks for sharing man, gives us in monk mode hope.
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MattyAnon Admin 5y ago
As someone else says:
and OP says
You will, you're pretty close.
Great FR, appreciate the realism. You're right on the shit test fails, but it's not all shit tests. Often it's a girl's actual opinion. Can still be changed, so in this way it's a shit test.
Fundamentally you are doing it all right, but try to learn to care less about "breaking sets". You've got PUA lingo in your veins, get it out of your system. Normal people refer to "people" and "groups" and "pairs". It's very normal for normal/social people to back and forth. Meet, break, meet someone else, break, meet the first people, break. This is a great way to meet a lot of people and build social proof.
Try to get out of the mentality of seeing a linear progression from meet to fuck, and taking any interruptions as a fault in this plan - or worse a rejection.
To girls and guys who regularly fuck them it's more like a mix of meeting and meeting other people and back and forth. Don't be so attached to the people you're talking to. Them breaking/leaving is certainly not rejection, don't take it as such.
innominating 5y ago
Thanks. I really only felt rejected the one time, because I had invested a lot of time in the second set (the pair of girls of which the hot one said she had a boyfriend).
While we were dancing she said, “why did you pick me?”
I replied, “I don’t know, I’m just more attracted to you.”
I should have said, “who says I picked you?” Or, some flirty banter.
Needless to say, after my reply she went cold, which suggested validation seeking. Ultimately, I thought she knew I wanted to get with her and she rejected. I bailed not long after to look for a battle less uphill.
MattyAnon Admin 5y ago
You want to say something like "You've got an undefinable something about you.... so far so good".
You need to keep this sort of thing positive because it's a comfort test, without falling into the trap of being an unattractive committed beta.
Girls are insecure as fuck, and will reframe "he likes me" into "he just wants sex" in a heartbeat. It's a tricky line to walk, but you're almost there.
innominating 5y ago
I did just want sex.
MattyAnon Admin 5y ago
No fucking kidding.
The point is to appear like you have standards long enough that girls are attracted and those standards are real by virtue of your options.
innominating 5y ago
Yeah, but I don’t want to trick them into thinking that I want something else.
I want them to know all I want is sex and fuck me anyway. That’s the game I’m playing.
So the only standards I’m evaluating them on is sexiness, and likelihood of super crazy, or STDs, even though I’m strapping on. Which reminds me this broad wanted raw dog. Haha.
I get your point though. If I was looking for plates, I’d be dishing comfort here or there.
MattyAnon Admin 5y ago
Which you do by physically escalating and refusing to emotionally engage, not investing, and not trying too hard to have any attachment/commitment.
To do this you have to not make this too overt (anti slut defence) and be attractive.
Right, good things to evaluate on. Even for this game you should still be choosy. Especially for STD's and non-crazy.
MrTrizzles 5y ago
Jesus Christ if someone as chickenshit as you can do it then anyone can. I mean that in a nice way bro, well done. It only gets easier.
markinsinz7 5y ago
He's 6ft 6 pack age doesn't even matter unless he looks ridiculously old. Shut late 30s at a hotel bar is a women's fantasy.
Honestly hid whole problem is mental which is indeed really hard to rewire at that age. But that's life - sigh. Fuckin hate not being a natural sometimes
Heizenbrg 5y ago
I'm 56 and I don't give a fuck I've emberassed myself countless time and I just roll with it. Nobody gives af
memphisjohn 5y ago
His root problem is attachment to the outcome. He went to that bar with the purpose of getting laid. That affects every emotion, every action.
If otoh you went with the purpose of getting drunk, chatting a few people, maybe making a business contact... total different mindset, and I wager, better score % with the ladies.
innominating 5y ago
Totally mental. Self-important. Anxiety. Freeze when opening.
Once I open or am opened I have trouble with shit tests and am too logical and vanilla in conversation. I need to be way more fun or at least way more sexual early.
haroldpeters 5y ago
start asking questions that make them use their imagination.. open ended questions. Eg: If you could do anything right now what would it be. If she comes back with something lame giver her shit about it, and offer an example
DareyFathom 5y ago
Try getting a little buzzed. I'm at my best slightly buzzed. Drunk I get too sloppy, but a few drinks in and the conversation flows great and I still have sharp analytical skills.
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MrTrizzles 5y ago
I hope you’re practicing outside of actual pickup. Pick a style and practice on strangers. Take humorous. Try different ways to be funny. Maybe you have a good shit-eating grin you can use when needed, or maybe your style is more of a bemused expression. Maybe you’re a story-teller, or maybe you’re more of a clever observations type. If this was a sport your only practice wouldn’t be during league games, right? If nothing else just learn small talk, if that’s a challenge. You should be able to babble on about nothing at length without losing their interest.
innominating 5y ago
Good advice.
I am. I have gotten fairly good at small talk. I’m very good a public speaking.
My issue is being openly sexual. Or, being open in sexual environments.
MrTrizzles 5y ago
Ah, so you don’t feel like a sexual being. You are one, so something is blocking it. Fix the areas where you don’t feel sexual.
Hope you don’t mind the unsolicited advice. I feel rude saying this shit lol
innominating 5y ago
Of course not. I’m posting here for advice.
trees_away 5y ago
This is gonna sound weird AF.... But before I really swallowed the pill i had an experience during meditation where it was like I was seeing a vision of my body’s energy but couldn’t see anything defining my junk. It was like I was a Ken doll down there. Something was definitely blocking my sexual “chi” if you will. For me, some of it was my major low testosterone and self-consciousness about my skills in the sack. When I got more experience with women and realized that I’m actually a natural in the sack (I basically do sex god method by default, never even know what that is). I then began to see myself as a sexual being and began allowing my sexuality to be integrated with the rest of my being.
But honestly, the biggest thing blocking me, I just realized I was typing all of this, was my fakeness about who I was. I am kind of a freak sexually, and grew up thinking I was a pervert due to some bad religious influence. Sexuality was shameful to me. So I blocked it. It was only something I let out when no one else was around, because I was a fatass slob who knew deep down that nobody would find me sexually attractive in any way. That’s not the case for you, but I’m betting there’s something similar going on inside that you need to meditate on and process through. Focus on forgiving and accepting yourself, and even liking yourself. If there’s anything about yourself that you’re living out of alignment with externally vs internally, especially something of a sexual nature, that could be clogging up the pipes.
innominating 5y ago
100% I hide my sexuality due to conservative religion forced on me at a young age.
How does meditation work you through that? Any tips on meditating?
trees_away 5y ago
The meditation part is to help you gain inner strength and game. Read The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle. Learn to observe those “thoughts” that you’re having that are shaking your confidence when you start approaching. (They’re not your thoughts by the way. They’re chatter in your head. meditation will teach you to observe this chatter and learn to tell the difference between your own inner voice and the chatter in your head.
trees_away 5y ago
As far as the religious stuff, I’d be willing to chat more about how I got free of my sexual hangups there in private. Message me some time.
nadolny7 5y ago
That is some good advice, but I feel like my dislike for my current body is what fuels me to Change and go to the gym every day and diet, I might try this approach after I reach some predefined physique goals I’ve set up for myself.
trees_away 5y ago
Why does accepting your current state have to detract from wanting to change? They are not incompatible in my experience. I was at an Incubus concert a few weeks ago and my girl flashed the people behind us, and another girl responded then teased me saying "ok, your turn". Without hesitating, I lifted up my shirt and jiggled my still-existent belly and man boobs with zero shame. Yes, I'm fat still. No, I don't give a shit what people think about that.
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That was the first time in my life this has ever happened. I would have been so self-conscious before the red pill. Now, I just DGAF. Who cares if people think I'm fat. I had fun. I owned who I am. I accepted it. I was still confident. I still hd game. I did something silly and childish and let myself have permissions to not care. I'll never see those people again in my life. They mean nothing to me.
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This is what I'm talking about. Yes, I want to be trim, and muscular. Some day, I will be, with enough effort. Until then, I'll be ok being in process. Because I'll always be in process. When I get to my goals and look like a manly version of Dwyane Johnson instead of a dude who ate Dwyane Johnson, I'll still have more areas which need attention and improvement. Thats life. Waiting for success in one area to work on another is a fools excuse to never take action.
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Move your ass.
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oytrp 5y ago
I guess the takeaways are:
Hotel Bars are easy mode
Closing at last call is easy mode
And people wonder why we always say "Lift".
innominating 5y ago
I would add that you have to fight through self-doubt and have the balls to sexualize at least once.
atticusfinch1973 5y ago
How does this help anyone here? I'd rather see field reports with an actual lesson, not a minute by minute accounting.
At the very least post whatever you learned about each scenario, not just "yay I talked to people and got laid."
innominating 5y ago
I don’t know if it does help people here.
Good that you know what you want to read. Maybe I’ll preface future reports, if any, as “no theory.” But, probably not. Some people feel the opposite of you and like to see this type of report.
I’m not sure what I learned, if anything. There is no commentary because I have more questions than answers.
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[deleted] 5y ago
The concept, I think, is to actually talk to people and not get discouraged and leave.
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innominating 5y ago
This is awesome.
I was hoping someone would do this.
emdmarco 5y ago
How would you guys handle the shit test he received about buying the drink?