Defining the Difference
Sexual addiction is a real thing that affects many men in our country. There are probably a few dozen, at least! Props to these guys for dealing with a very serious struggle. For the rest of us, I'm increasingly confident that what the world shames men for as "addictive behaviors" is really the product of starvation of an important biological imperative. Of course, one can't discern between an addiction and starvation until their desire has been sated.
For example, a true glutton is addicted to food. This is, unsurprisingly, quite common even under the very relaxed psychological standards that try to avoid labeling people as "food addicts." Here's what it really boils down to, though:
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The addict will keep on eating even after he is full.
- The starved person will stop eating once he has been filled.
The same is true for any other biological imperative, including our sexuality.
Many of you may know my background as a Christian through my work on the RPChristians sub. One thing the church is great at doing is shaming men for their sexuality. I can't count the number of men who have told me, "I'm a sex addict," as some big confession for which they're looking for my cure. I'd ask them about their behaviors and it would line up - they'd be thinking about sex constantly, be watching porn constantly, fantasizing about all kinds of things that their wives would never do with them, cheating on their wives, etc. I always ask two questions after I hear their confession: How often do you have sex with your wife? And is it good sex or duty sex? Sure enough, "We have sex about once a month, and it's usually duty sex." Hmm ...
These men, and countless others, are controlled by their sexual desires - but they are not addicted. They are merely unfulfilled. This distinction matters.
Why This Matters
We want sex. That's a good thing. Society tells women it's a good thing and that they should embrace their sexuality. Just look at the media, magazines at the checkout line, TV and movies, etc. If you want to get scholarly about it, look up research papers on Sexual Cultural Scripting that focus on media and political influences and have some fun.
In short, if a man misunderstands his own sexual desire as an addiction rather than a starvation, he's likely to buy into the lies that society feeds him, making it harder for him to swallow the pill and embrace some of the best parts of being a man. If society can convince men that their mentality about sex is a disorder, then those men will be compelled to look for a cure. And believe me, there are countless people selling all kinds of "cures" - from physical pills to psychological strategies, and even philosophical ideals that advance someone else's agenda.
People as a whole are easily suggestible. If someone tells you, "You're fat," even if we know it's objectively wrong, some part of us will wonder if there is any truth in the statement. Likewise, if someone says, "You have a problem. I have something that could really help you with that," we're most often curious. If the world tries to tell you you're a "sex addict," at some point you'll probably question whether or not they're right. This type of questioning is good, but the suggestion often lends itself to a particular conclusion. That's why attorneys always ask leading questions on cross-examination: because when you suggest a conclusion that doesn't seem far-fetched, people are more inclined to agree, and this often even changes a person's internal memory and point of reference on the issue once they have a present verbalization of assent to a concept that really should have gone the other way. But let's not get too sidetracked on that point, as I'm probably preaching to the choir.
What To Do?
I remember the days where I attempted to suppress my sexuality altogether. I just wrote my story on RPChristians, if you want to read more about it, but the TL;DR of the relevant part is that my wife reasonably didn't want to have sex with me, but her and the church shamed me for use of porn, leaving me with no sexual outlet at all. I was told I was addicted to sex because of how frequently I was using porn at one point. Once I embraced the fact that I was sex starved and not sex addicted, things started changing.
For one, my internal desire for sex is now easily sated. Shortly after discovering RP I would engage in mental masturbation, getting excited about all the sex I would have once I was "man enough." Of course, the time soon came when I could have sex on demand. I found that I no longer wanted it as often as I thought I would when I was in my starved state. I remember fasting for a week once. When the hunger truly set in all I could think about was how much I would eat when the fast was over. Then the fast ended. I loaded up my plate with all kinds of goodies ... then ate half of it and went off to do something else. That doesn't mean I don't want sex anymore - I certainly do. Rather, it means that I can now enjoy my sexuality to the brim and appreciate it for what it is without an insatiable desire that forced me to pedestalize that which could only momentarily appease me.
Second, once my desire for sex was sated, I was no longer controlled by my wife's sexuality. For those who are still single, it means you won't be controlled by female sexuality and strategy as a whole. This meant that I was now free in my marriage and life to do what I wanted to do, and when I wanted to do it. If I wanted to have sex, I'd have sex. If I wanted to go to the gym, I'd go to the gym. If I wanted to do something to advance my mission, I'd do that too. My life became mine to control because I no longer demanded her supply; she supplied on my demand ... or more accurately nowadays, I am the supply that she's demanding, and I make sure I'm a commodity she doesn't get or see anywhere else - especially among the other church men.
Third, once I was no longer controlled by my wife's sexuality, she became controlled by mine. Because I didn't need her in order to be happy and fulfilled, the balance of power shifted, per Rollo's Cardinal Rule of Relationships: The person with the most power is the one who needs the other the least. When I didn't need to bend to her will, she bent to mine - and she was happier for it.
As I've noted on RPC often before, women are empaths - and that subject deserves a post of its own. But the basic concept is simply that when a man sacrifices his own happiness for the sake of his wife, she empathically experiences his unhappiness alongside of him and it makes the relationship miserable. When the man pursues his own happiness, even at the expense of his wife's interests, she empathically experiences his happiness alongside him, and it makes the relationship enjoyable for both of them.
Conclusion
Don't pedestalize your sexuality anymore than you pedestalize your wife or the women you want to sleep with. Believing society's lie that all men are sex-craved maniacs leaves a power of suggestion that you'd be better off rejecting - and not because you want to prove a counter-point (that you're not a "sex-craved maniac"), but because you have a healthy point of origin about why you crave sex in the first place.
ONEitis is dangerous, whether the object of your affection is a tangible woman or a sexual ideology. If you find yourself sexually hungry, don't become obsessed with your hunger. Accept that either you're not in a time of feasting and embrace the fast (monk mode) or go have sex and curb your appetite. Either way, by re-framing your thinking away from an addictive mentality and toward a regulated (not restrained) desire can give you a greater sense of control in how you express your sexuality, which both improves your attractive draw and ultimately makes you more satisfied as a man.
sky_fallen 5y ago
You are very logical and its impressive.
Juggernaut_is_here 5y ago
So you were sexing other women right? so that you are not bound to your wife's sexuality anymore?
Mortery 5y ago
"...people are more inclined to agree, and this often even changes a person's internal memory and point of reference on the issue once they have a present verbalization of assent to a concept that really should have gone the other way."
Literally after I read this paragraph, Is the clear example of what you wrote there, friend!
Lateralanouncer 5y ago
Use sex to make u stronger, I have a little ocd am 39 and consider myself a sex Addict. Sex addiction is more about you mind being able to function on your life’s mission without instant sex, than having sex itself. I try to use sex as a reward for working hard. Ie. I’m not going to hit the clubs tonight unless I get X,U,z done. A slip up for me would be finding a nympho and going into a sex coma for several months, it puts my life at a stand still.
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m4ch1ina 5y ago
As soon as read the title I upvoted the post, because I knew in an instant which one I am.
MisterRoid 5y ago
Did you start to have sex with other women to regain the power in the relationship? A woman withholding sex in a relationship is unacceptable, so I hope you satisfied your need elsewhere without hiding it.
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butata 5y ago
You sound like a man with very low self-approval. If you use half of the time you spent on sex or women, you would've helped many people and achieved much greater success.
I get the appeal of taking red pill; sometimes I thought to myself that I could probably be just another guy taking the red pill if I was born man. But red pill can only work for a period of time and for me, it wouldn't be enough for my motivation to achieve something bigger in life. I'm not talking about getting laid or getting married and start a family. I've always wanted something bigger than that. And I don't think I should rely on women if I were really a man to provide that thrill or passion or the sense of self-approval or validation. Or the recognition from other men. The only enemy is the one in my head.
Seriously though, keeping a man is just as equally complicated as man keeping a woman... Sometimes it's just not worthy of the trouble when there's something else that matters too in life. Like picking up a new instrument or language lol. It's not something sex or the opposite sex can bring you. Cheers. ????
Juggernaut_is_here 5y ago
please do make a post when you figure this out..I am willing to wait years for that...till then my goal is extreme self improvement so that I can follow your lifestyle...I like the thrill of new women..and especially the different Orgasm screams and Orgasm faces of different women...as if a different type of spiritual energy is released in each sexual encounter...I am seriously afraid of myself...that when I am 65+ I will be all alone staring at a wall...that's why I intend to go Blasting and Cruising age 40 up so that , I die early and die while still being sexually somewhat attractive to women around 15-20 years younger than me....this is a serious problem, and you may be the first guy to hack your way our of it
sekandagu 5y ago
The book "cupids poisoned arrow" tries to answer this question, best attempt I have come across. It's a good mix of science, history, and ancient wisdom. Don't know if it's strictly "red pill" because it's written by a women. But it's definitely worth checking out.
prostaddict 5y ago
You should check out SLAA meetings. It sounds like you suffer from Love addiction. It may help you internalize where that's coming from and how to redirect that in more fulfilling ways
Luckyluke23 5y ago
as someone who gets the lest about of girls here... I feel like this too sometimes.
HumanSockPuppet 5y ago
If you want to avoid the boredom that comes with familiarity, try limiting yourself to seeing a particular girl no more than once per week - and on occasion, once every two weeks. With a week between visits, you can give yourself just enough time to crave her particular flavour of femininity.
As an added bonus, the time apart prevents her from learning too much about you too quickly, thereby extending the viable length of the relationship. And after spending so much time away from you, she'll be bubbly and excited to see you, thereby jump-starting your pleasant experience of her.
The key in all this is as you said: pursuing new pussy constantly. If you schedule your plates and new pursuits on a regular rotation, you can keep your preferred girl on call.
red_philosopher 5y ago
I love the feeling of oneitis when it's being fulfilled. It's heroin pure and simple. Then it all goes to shit. I agree that it is unfair to women who are involved with me. They want that committed long-term partner, and I do as well. I just can't provide that knowing they'll screw me over the moment they think it's viable to do so.
Frankly I'm tired of the churn. It gets old.
trees_away 5y ago
Why not OLTR a plate and keep spinning? There are times when I’m sexually satisfied, too busy focusing on work and hustle, and I’m really glad that I can crawl into bed at the end of a hard day, wake up my GF with my cock in her mouth, and not go to bed horny cause I’ve been too busy to hunt.
And then there’s times when I really want the thrill of the chase, and so I’ll go find someone else to fuck and remember why I like strange so much. Best part is, it’s like it freshens up my attraction for my girl after I’ve fucked someone else. Then the monotony of fucking only her for a week or two fades and a bit of newness in the relationship is back.
Red-Curious 5y ago
I like this story. It's part of why I emphasize an undervalued aspect of RP praxeology: a man must have a mission that transcends his pursuit of women.
WorkThrowAway125 5y ago
Damn this resonates with me.
TheMETALStriker 5y ago
I too am a married Christian and I currently struggle with lust. I understand the whole, better yourself and distract yourself and make yourself desirable. I get more sex than most and can keep my mind distracted for a good long while.
In fact, I pray and pray and pray harder for help controlling my lustful thoughts. I just find myself giving the excuse, "even though it's porn it's better than cheating for real."
It's the desiring more desire; desiring someone else to desire me. Desiring even more sex puts strain on the marriage. Believe or not exercise turns up the sex drive and makes it even worse. I find myself having to fight off adulterous thoughts multiple times a day, every day.
BrownGummyBear 5y ago
Praying will never allow you to control your thoughts... if you want to understand your thought process and how thoughts arise due to different emotions/circumstances then I suggest you meditate. Meditating will teach you to view your thoughts from a distance as they appear, that will allow you to stop getting involved in thoughts you don’t want to have
Praying “harder” is futile
TheMETALStriker 5y ago
Thank you! Finally, someone gives me something to work with, that also is biblically based (whether you knew it or not).
I really need to set aside time to meditate on God's Word and Christ's character, in hopes I can prevent my flesh from reacting so rashly. That way the next time a flirtatious temptress crosses my path I don't even consider giving in, let alone settling for a porn quickie, which only subsides the urge temporarily.
Yes, this is good. I will do this. I'm confident this will work. Thank you brother and many blessings to you and yours.
BrownGummyBear 5y ago
What exactly are you thinking about when I say “meditate”? I’m pretty sure we’re talking about two completely different things.
I was referring to “mindfulness” meditation. The objective of it is to focus in your senses and quiet the “inner dialogue” inside of your head (also known as your ego). The objective is to be in the present moment as much as possible, every time your mind gets distracted and your mind starts to chatter you notice the distraction and go back to paying attention to the present moment.
This practice is way older than Christianity...
TheMETALStriker 5y ago
Wow, I say "thank you" and you almost make me taste my lunch with your response. Little hint, you didn't need to respond at all.
Okay, if this new age psycho babble helps you be more of a traditional man and not a beta cuckold, good for you. However, if you want to know of biblical meditation, you can feel free to look it up and find any similarities or differences yourself. You're the one making the statement that it's "not the same thing," so go for it.
What I will say on the matter is that if I were to "stay in the moment" when the lusty redhead is flirting with me, I would not remain faithful. Meditating on God's Word gives me an anchor, something to look to when, in the moment I'm tempted. I already started doing so, right after you suggested it and it's made a difference. Granted it hasn't been long but I'm the type to finish a job, so I'm going to see this through.
framedaddy 5y ago
Stop dividing yourself against an unattainable ideal. You’re a monkey floating on a rock in space — your lust is natural, learn some self control and act with a rational mind... the guilt of not being perfect will kill you otherwise stop wrestling your psyche every time 6 billion years of evolution doesn’t perfectly align with 2,000 years of text. it’s just a teaching bro, a manual. take the good parts and toss the others. no need to punish yourself for not being christ.
TheMETALStriker 5y ago
You're right about one thing, I don't need to punish myself for not being Christ. Christ freed me from the shame; that doesn't mean it's easy. Also, according to your logic, what is the point in self control if I'd only be getting in the way of evolution?
It'd be so easy for me to fuck around. I don't out of the desire for something more. I don't to be an example to my kids. I don't to establish trust and I do all of this for God's glory.
Why establish trust at all if I'm just a monkey? A man is capable of every evil, without God. What is love but a chemical reaction, without God to give clarity?
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framedaddy 5y ago
because if i acted on every impulse i’d probably have killed 10 people by now. religions have good methods and tactics for how to act or build societies but they’re just that; tactics and methods. use your own brain and build yourself an empire: for yourself or for others, it’s really fulfilling and perfectly aligns with your biology and will give you more meaning than nihilism that comes once you realize there’s no man in the sky. existentialism is right next door to nihilism and once we realize there’s no god or salvation all there’s left to do is “win” because it perfectly aligns with our biology, hence why capitalism is the best, both for men and women. there’s no need to feel shame for not aligning with the norms or doctrines of a society or scripture. you were born a free man. shame is just a mismatch from the ideal societies use to keep people in line.
TheMETALStriker 5y ago
Plenty of empires can be built on unfaithful and Godless men. Why be faithful if there's nothing greater than you or your desires? All that's wrong with killing 10 people is the law taking you down, right? Otherwise, you could do whatever and why not?
However, my question is, isn't porn better than cheating for real? I've been seeing it related to the same thing. I don't equate it as such, by far. Though, being Christian I cannot rely on my own rationale alone, thus my arrival here. Christ says if I'm committing adultery in my heart it's just as bad as doing it; well I'm doing it and multiple times a day.
framedaddy 5y ago
“Plenty of empires can be built on unfaithful and Godless men. Why be faithful if there's nothing greater than you or your desires”
Because it seems you lack the confidence and gravitas to think for yourself... So you play life on easy mode with a manual of do’s and dont’s from 2,000 years ago. Not meant as ad hominem, just being blunt.
Why not kill ? Because I don’t want to go to jail and usually the risk/reward isn’t worth it. Not like they were breaking into my home to try and rape my child or something. No porn isn’t better than sex. Reality is reality. Sure it might be better to maintain a faithful marriage but simply because your wife most likely wouldn’t let you fuck other women because you lack the frame to tell her what you want because you’re running Christian OS in your brain. A solid OS for middle class men but terrible for leaders and visionaries. Your “heart” is just the feels from your subconscious mind and its relation to the grand narrative, in your case - Christianity.
I’m not saying go cheat on your wife... But if you choose to not do it, make the choice using your frontal lobe and weigh out the consequences instead of thinking “adultery = bad”.
BrownGummyBear 5y ago
I couldn’t have said it better! Christianity is nothing but an OS created to control the masses and letting middle class beta men get married. Christianity somehow kept hypergamy in check (that’s why the Bible advocated stoning non-virgin brides and unfaithful women to death), keeping hypergamy in check allowed beta men to create families without them needing to develop frame or improve themselves.
TheMETALStriker 5y ago
It's so amusing seeing "play life on easy mode" from someone who makes choices based on fear. You fear the law and therefore do as you're told. I choose to love the one truth that matters; the living God who chose me before time and knitted me in my mother's womb, knowing me so well He knows the number of hairs on my head. Talk about epic! Talk about adventure and the most real any quest can get!
For someone who brings up the allure of murder but says, "risk/reward isn't worth it" obviously has no idea what they are talking about, which is coming from someone who has technically (but legally) murdered... Is it murder if it's legal...side track. So, it was completely pointless you bringing up the killing of 10 people.
Should I consider, "oh I really shouldn't look at her titties while she runs, my wife wouldn't be respected." "I shouldn't check out her ass in those leggings, I'm being demeaning." "I shouldn't smile and flirt back with this cute redhead, it could end with my wife leaving." Maybe I should think those things but I don't. Maybe I should choose to try and think that way but I (now this I'm not so sure about) think Christ has a better solution.
Basically, am I being an asshole in saying my wife is technically replaceable? Yes, I am but according to your logic, that's more than acceptable, it's often suggested. The word of God says otherwise and that, by no means, is easy. I choose to follow Christ out of (attempted) obedience and I choose to obey out of love. A type of love that I can't explain.
MayanEnt 5y ago
And you fear an eternity of hell, so what's your point? At least we fear laws which we know have very negative consequences if we don't follow them, no one has even proven hell exists though. So you in the other hand are fearing something that's just in your imagination...
WHAT THE FUCK? The ALLURE of murder? What the heck is alluring about taking someone else's life exactly? Is this supposed to be a common thing for the average person because I don't see anything alluring about killing someone. Like, at all. Just no. NO.
NOW THAT EXPLAINS IT.
I'M OUT OF HERE lol
framedaddy 5y ago
I don’t want to kill anyone... just saying if I acted on impulse in times of rage I might have. Thankfully I was able to assess the situation and control myself. That’s all I was saying. The point I was making was I didn’t choose mercy because of a commandment, I chose it based on my mind.
I do live based on fear by the way. Fear that I’ll die without respect, honor, fame, wealth, and legacy. Have fun obeying the messiah while I pay people like you to obey me and build my empire. Funny thing is it will actually inspire more people than your existence. So although you’ll be living “virtuously” as an “obedient” clone I’m going to go struggle to create things that will inspire men who can actually handle the truth so we don’t spiral into a nihilistic cesspool.
TheMETALStriker 5y ago
Many important men (as well as their empires and creations) have come and go and faded with time. Just because you have a God complex doesn't mean you're even close to being in the same arena as Him. You're hostility toward God/Christianity/Christians (and inability to stay on topic) is evident, misplaced and a wasted effort. You can't create His kingdom but you are welcome to it, should you choose to begin to open your heart to the possibility of actual love and purpose.
I'm not "commanded" to be merciful. As a matter of fact I don't even really understand the value God placed in much of His created people. Yet, we have all been created in His image and are all loved by Him and given an example of how to love others. So those people I see as a waste of flesh (and would better serve as a smear on the wall in my opinion) aren't and in fact deserve mercy, not because of anything I've done, definitely not because of what they've done but because God says. You give mercy out of fear, I do out of love.
Fear is easy, that's another chemical reaction. It takes a greater strength to choose faith love and genuine change.
MayanEnt 5y ago
Countless of religions and Gods have also come and gone throughout humanity's history. Christianity will die eventually. Religions are usually created, then they have a time of expansion (usually this time is very violent for religions, like how the Inquisition was with Christianity or how nowadays Muslims are blowing buildings up because they want to expand their religion) and then a time of decline.
Christianity is probably entering in the time of decline, the only way Christianity can survive nowadays is by adapting to the moral ethics of modern day society. 50 years ago Christianity could get away with calling homosexual sinners and ostracizing them from society, nowadays if a church tries to do that people will probably talk shit about that church and said church will loose followers. Hundreds of years ago it was all cool and dandy to stone people to death for a variety of reasons, all in the "name of Jesus". Nowadays Christianity wouldn't be able to get away with such barbaric acts. Christianity has to adapt to modern society or it will cease to exist completely as it no longer is useful to us.
That says a lot about you. So is the only reason you treat others right because you're scared of your sky over-lord? You're not kind to others just because there's some empathy in your heart? Do you need to be threatened with eternal hellfire for you to be a decent person in our society? Would you start punching people and being rude to others if you thought Jesus wasn't spying on your every day life? ... just wow
I'm just speechless. I'm pretty sure this answers all of my previous questions.
JUST LOL
[deleted] 5y ago
That’s why you need polygamy.
Sincerely, A Muslim
Mildo 5y ago
I don't understand how people can swallow RedPill, but still believe in organized religion. This poorly written post is full of contradictions. Are you with a different woman than the wife you had that viewed you as a beta and withheld sex?
BrownGummyBear 5y ago
I became an atheist as a teen, which made me realize how society lies to us and how organized religion tries to manipulate the masses. When I found the red pill it was so easy to swallow it for me, if I had been lied to about heaven/hell/afterlife throughout my life the chances about being fed blue-pill lies was high in my mind. I just realized that the blue pill was also being used as a way to control the masses (as a way to let beta men have families and reproduce).
TheMETALStriker 5y ago
For the understanding of cohesive RedPill lifestyle and religious lifestyle, you would need to understand the religious lifestyle. For instance, Christianity is clear on the roles of men and women and the roles of husband and wife. Husbands are not subject to their wives, nor wives to their husbands. However, it clearly demonstrates the complimentary difference and uses of each sex/role and the benefits of fulfilling such.
Mildo 5y ago
Let me guess... you're also Christian?
Lib3rtarianSocialist 5y ago
Almost all of the time, organised religion is blue pilled. It provides a comfortable set of ideas presented as truth that one can rely on to enact some order in their lives. And, good that you said organised religion.
He wrote it was the same wife. Are you sceptical that the wife's behaviour changed after his transformation?
Mildo 5y ago
Yes, I'm skeptical. Sounds like he is rationalizing his ONEitis.
SpaderAce 5y ago
Sounds like you've taken one blue pill mindset and switched it with another. The entire point of the redpill is that you define your own reality, which is what it sounds like he has done
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Lib3rtarianSocialist 5y ago
Good thinking there in my opinion. Unlikely though for the OP. He seems to be a self-realised man.
Mildo 5y ago
Oh boy. I'm going to leave now. Good luck?
HotSuccess 5y ago
I am a little confused on how you went from only having sex with your wife when she wanted to shifting the powers to having sex on demand? I got that it was kind of a mentality shift of starvation mode vs addiction, but can you expand on that?
Red-Curious 5y ago
Yeah, sorry for that confusion. The ability to have sex on demand came with "lift, sidebar, STFU, etc." In essence, improving myself as a man. Even after this improvement, when I still viewed myself as a sex addict and tried to fulfill an ideal that I had created when I was starved, all the while not actually enjoying living up to that ideal.
There have been many guys who have posted about this phenomenon - giving field reports about how having all of their sexual fantasies met still wasn't satisfying them: because a man needs a mission in life beyond his own sexuality.
Clinging to ideologies we had in our beta days - even if we're now fulfilling them - merely means we remain in the same crappy beta frame we came from. It does not prove that we are any better on an ideological or internal level than we were when we first crafted those fantasies. In short, that only makes for a blue pill man who's deceptive enough externally to get laid. Such a man will still controlled by his ongoing beta frame - the frame of who we once were when we were weak and starved.
By making the mental transition from an "I'm an addict" frame to "I just wasn't getting my fill," we are able to regain control over our sexuality, lessening our ability to be influenced by society or the women we're sleeping with in the first place, and also by the old men we once were.
Kampizi 5y ago
It sounds like you changed mental state of mind to focus on yourself and desire sex less.
I think other comment wanted to know numbers. Now that you have reframed are you getting laid more or less than once a month?
Red-Curious 5y ago
As often as I want, which right now is anywhere from 2-5 times a week. I've got more important things to do in life than chase pussy all the time. The important thing is that I get it when I want it.
[deleted] 5y ago
I too would like to hear about this.
HuckFinn69 5y ago
Why does every post on theredpill use so many words to say so little?
max_peenor 5y ago
To confuse simpletons so they will leave.
Kampizi 5y ago
It's so that outsiders cannot claim it is a woman bashing sub, with short hand you get people misinterpreting what you say or taking snippets out
Ramp_Up_Then_Dump 5y ago
"Few word" versions are at side bar.
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Seaghan88 5y ago
It's a pain. The less said, the better.
smokebowlington 5y ago
I agree with you 100%. The sad part is this message is only going to reach a tiny fraction of men who have already been red-pilled anyways.
phenethyljammin 5y ago
I think the recent drama around feminism, rape accusations, and so forth is driving and will further drive men towards men's rights related content.
Red-Curious 5y ago
In my experience, most people on this sub are not red pilled. They crafted certain fantasies during their beta days and merely change their external behaviors pursuant to red pill advice in order to gratify those blue pill fantasies about what type of sex life they always wanted.
This post is for those men who believe they have "arrived," but who still let their old blue pill fantasies about sexuality control their behaviors. They have not yet become their own men, as they're living in the same frame that they allegedly came here to escape. A crucial step in swallowing the pill that many seem to skim over is regaining control over our sexuality and sexual ideology.
[deleted] 5y ago
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Red-Curious 5y ago
It's an internal issue, not external. Imagine jacking it to porn is like eating a potato chip. Your body is really craving steak, potatoes and broccoli. How many potato chips does a guy have to eat before he's a steak and potatoes addict? Can't say because he isn't eating steak and potatoes anyway. What about a food addict in general? No clue. How bad are those potato chips screwing up his life?
[deleted] 5y ago
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chauncy_popperstein 5y ago
IMHO,
The problem is most of the people spend a lot of time talking about TRP and very little doing TRP.
It is easier to talk about self improvement than to actually get off your ass and do it.
Leonrazurado 5y ago
As a married Christian, the pill was hard to swallow as I attempted to line it up with my beliefs. Kind of going through the same issues. Thanks for the write up and now I know there's a RPC sub.
We1Throwaway 5y ago
To me, the modern church seems largely incompatible with TRP. Nothing they taught me made me a man I could be proud of. I think I have a chance now that I'm here.
Atheist_Utopia 5y ago
Why don't you take the next step and question your belief altogether?
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PsychedelicDentist 5y ago
"Also sold in powder and liquid form"
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Leonrazurado 5y ago
I have but I've seen enough of God's handiwork in my life to know deep in my bones that Christ has saved me.
ceqozesah 5y ago
This guy needs the redpill on Religion. Soz
red_philosopher 5y ago
The only reconciliation I have ever been able to accord is that "God" is a metaphor for a Superdeterministic universe. Free will is an illusion, but an illusion that is of such fidelity as to not matter.
"God" wants us to choose of our own free will, but if it "knows" our choices, the only way is for the universe to be Superdeterministic. Otherwise, we could make a truly random choice, of which "God" could not possibly know because it was completely random. If the universe is Superdeterministic, we have no free will, and thusly can never "choose" "God".
I used to be a believer, I desperately tried to believe. I was never happier than when I shed the trappings of faith.
TheEventHorizon0727 5y ago
A deterministic universe is the answer to the questions raised by Einstein's "spooky actions at a distance"; that is, consider two quantum-entangled electrons, which are simultaneously spin-up and spin-down (i.e., in superposition), and flying apart at the speed of light. They fly apart for eons (say they were born during the big bang). An observer observes one of the entangled pair, forcing it, say, spin-up. Its entangled-pair electron will immediately be forced spin-down. It takes no genius to realize that the force which forced the spin down condition must have traveled faster than the speed of light, which Einstein says is impossible. The only way to explain this empirically-determined phenomenon without forces traveling faster than the speed of light is to understand that the Universe is deterministic. The Universe, when the spin-pair was born, KNEW what the observer would do billions of years later when the observer forced the first of the pair spin-up; and that knowledge was built into the electrons at the moment of their birth. The observer MAY have thought he had free will to choose spin-up or spin-down; but he did not. The Universe knew when the observation would be made, and what that observation would be, 4 billion years before the observer was even born.
gulag_disco 5y ago
That might be true in that particular hypothetical, but isn’t when you talk about superposition of electrons in a single atom. Pop-science mistakes the collapse of probability as a miracle of the conscious observer, when in fact it’s the act of measurement, i.e. “knocking” an electron with a photon in order to measure it, that collapses its probability. Consciousness might actually mean squat in the context of the universe.
I think the bigger point here is that Christian dogma is pretty incompatible with RP evo-psych.
TheEventHorizon0727 5y ago
I don't think you are correct about the nature of the wave-function collapse by observation. If one shoots a stream of electrons at a double-slitted opaque barrier, and set up a screen behind the barrier to detect the electrons, something amazing happens. If you set up the measuring device to measure electrons as a particle, they behave like particles, and two lines of electrons impinging on the detection screen appear, just as you would expect them to appear if the electrons were particles. But if you set the measuring device up to measure electrons as waves, and shoot the electron stream at the double-slitted barrier, then you will get a wave interference pattern on the detection screen. It was the conscious choice of the observer, whether to measure the electrons as particles or waves, that made the electron behave as a particle or wave. No one physically "knocked" the electron in either case - it was merely the observer's choice of HOW to measure that CAUSED the electrons to act as waves or particles.
Lib3rtarianSocialist 5y ago
Good for you. Keep questioning. Doesn't mean all religious belief is nonsensical. Scientific empiricism has its place and religious or traditional truths have theirs, particularly when concerned with morality.
red_philosopher 5y ago
Religious beliefs are always nonsensical. They may still have purpose, but that purpose can be adhered to or chosen without a deity or other power.
Traditional truths exist because of repeatable observations. The reasons for those observations were indeterminable at that time.
Religious beliefs tend to follow the same tenets. There were repeatable, observable behaviors; the rationale of which were indeterminable, so they explained it as best they could.
In relation to morality, there is no morality. Morality is a human concept. We say it exists because we find it comforting. Killing 50,000,000 people may seem immoral, but is it because there's a fundamental law of the universe that says it's wrong? Or is it because we like to think it is? Ultimately, 50,000,000 people were removed from the gene pool. Think evolution gives a fuck? Zero fucks given.
Lib3rtarianSocialist 5y ago
I agree.
There exists an argument that since you act things out in the world, you have a hierarchy of values, and whatever ideal occupies the top position in your hierarchy is your meta-God. The meta-God is what, roughly speaking, the purpose of deities in religion and tradition was.
Interesting argument. Your point of view makes sense to a degree. It leads to a pure Machiavellian mode of living, which there is nothing wrong with.
Point taken.
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Code-Master13 5y ago
Same here. I'm subbed to both now.
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