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This community was created as a harbor for RP minded women whose goal is to build a lasting and happy relationship with a great man.

Created by LuckyLittleStar

Forums.Red / RedPillWomen / INSIGHTFUL

Aerobus

Posted 11y ago in INSIGHTFUL - Permalink - Locked - 735 Views

https://i.imgur.com/n9YSPG5.jpg

Of course, it is extreme to suggest that a man would commit suicide because of this. However, do not be surprised at how much damage you, as a woman, are capable of doing to your spouse.

Men face the world everyday. They encounter obstacles in their daily lives with their coworkers and their family members. They get stressed at work. They deal with many problems and fix them, as best as they can. Sometimes they don't do a perfect job, and sometimes what they do isn't to your liking, but I guarantee that good men in general put their best foot forward to simply do better.

The last thing he needs is to come home to more criticism and punishment, especially considering the fact that the wife is the person he wants comfort from.

Permalink

LadyLumen 11y ago

I've learned the hard way not to bring up any heavy topics or criticisms right when he gets home from work. I usually cook dinner and we have a light conversation about something simple. Then we watch tv or play a game. And maybe after like 2 hours if I have something important I need to say, I tell him then.

Aerobus 11y ago

This is the best way to handle important things to say.

-3

VarsitySlutTeamCpt 11y ago

Definitely not going to be me.

katsumii 11y ago

The sad part is that both men and women embrace this attitude. Men outwardly contribute to the trope of the nagging wife, in the form of light-hearted jokes, nudges, and in their social habits/reflexes. This is a perpetual effect.

It has been going on for a long time, I know — I barely have the gist of the history of this trope. Myself being young, plus since nibbling on the red pill, I'm finally noticing its impact.

Wondering: What is an appropriate response to this attitude?

As of now, I generally keep silent, no rolling eyes or gestural response, maybe putting forward a "red pill" inspired joke if the atmosphere allows.

What advice would be given for a woman surrounded by this mental outlook and is unsettled by it? If advice is contextual, I'll be happy to give examples/anecdotes that might call for it.

To Aerobus: Truly agreed that the last thing a man needs is criticism from his wife. Thanks for posting the "comic" and bringing up the topic.

SuperSlavisWife 11y ago

If others joke about nagging, interfering and controlling women, I generally don't butt in, because that would just prove their point. Actions speak louder than words there. If Jon jokes about it (usually evidenced by extreme exaggeration), I joke along with him because we both know it doesn't have to be true and isn't true in our case.

katsumii 11y ago

If others joke about nagging, interfering and controlling women, I generally don't butt in, because that would just prove their point.

Ha - excellent point. :) Thanks for sharing.

FlowerAndWillowWorld 11y ago

Men don't "contribute" to the trope, they're just telling it like it is. The only way to get your man to stop treating you like you are nagging and controlling is to actually stop nagging and stop being controlling.

As far as other men talking about women this way, clearly they don't have many positive female examples in their lives. It's up to us to change this perception because we are the ones creating it. But since it's unlikely the vast majority of women will come around to red pill ways, you're going to hear these things from men whether you like it or not. It's best to simply ignore it. There's no need to roll your eyes or bottle up your anger if it's not even something you yourself are doing anyway. Be secure in the knowledge that you are not like that.

katsumii 11y ago

Hi FlowerAndWillowWorld,

Men don't "contribute" to the trope, they're just telling it like it is.

Unfortunately I'm only referring to some men of couples, men with girlfriends past or present — these ones surrender to their wives quite blatantly, because to them, "that's just the way it is," and "there's no way out" (besides death, as in the opening comic). The men I refer to aren't mine. The women who manage them (i.e. their wives or girlfriends, current or past) play into the attitude, not expressing any intent to stop nagging or interfering. You're familiar with the sort of couples I talk about?

My apologies if I'm echoing a common theme ... Still very new to the red pill, and beginning to learn its applications.

There's no need to roll your eyes or bottle up your anger if it's not even something you yourself are doing anyway. Be secure in the knowledge that you are not like that.

Right. Thank you.

[deleted] 11y ago

That "comic" perfectly sums up the relationship dynamic I watched growing up. My father commuted 4 hours round trip to work 10-12 daily. He was met at the door with everything that went wrong with her day (mostly me) and what (in detail) he should do about it.

Nagging, dictating, withholding affection, bullying -all daily bullshit my dad had to go through.

They are still married and she has changed a lot. He has too. I visited last year for a few weeks and it was interesting to watch the dynamic again. He did not tolerate her bullshit and she bowed to his correction.

LadyLumen 11y ago

It's men like this who start going to the bar, or hanging out with their buddies after work, in stead of going home.

VarsitySlutTeamCpt 11y ago

Men are the masters of subduing chaos with anonymity. Women muster up the storms from a single rain drop.

[deleted] 11y ago

Nice insight. Something that helps me be a nicer person to not only my SO is picturing a scenario like this. Do you want to be known to his friends as the "annoying, controlling girlfriend"? Eventually he will tell his friends about his relationship problems, and this is how they will picture you. It reflects badly on not only you as a girlfriend, but him as well. (Of course, the main reason you should do this is to comfort your SO, and not for a good reputation).

wifeintraining 11y ago

Thank you for this wonderful reminder. We women do not see what our men go through at work, and sometimes we forget how hard he works to support us. Our job is to provide a safe, calm space for him to come home to after a long day, not to prolong his stresses.

box_cutter_ 11y ago

Try to imagine your home as an oasis of tranquility and make it that way.

Ojisan1 11y ago

Not just at work. Some dude pulled in front of an ex-cop in traffic the other day in SoCal and the ex-cop started chasing him down, pulled him out of the car, and pointed a gun in his face. Men have to be prepared for threats and stresses that can come from anywhere, from seemingly nowhere sometimes. It's a constant challenge - the world "shit tests" a man on a daily basis.

[deleted]

frozen_strawberry 11y ago

how is that helpful? op is right.