Alright everybody, today I decided to post a few things about relationships/relationship game and to try to clear up some misconceptions many users who recently discovered trp may have.
Regarding this matter: I'll give you a bit of background story. To help you understand how I came to be here, and what happened. Most of you might even relate to your feelings. Starting at my 19, I was a kid in 2nd year college with little experience and knowledge on game, only being a natural, until I met a friend who introduced me to the world of PUA. In terms of sociality, I was extroverted but totally so at that time I had a big boom inside me and decided it's time to CHANGE. I begun sarging, got a job in a nightclub as it's a perfect venue to meet new people and specifically women. All went good, in a few months I had more kiss and number closes, dates, and then lays and the girls were coming more and more into my life.
Where the mistake happened : At some point, having little relationship game and experience, but full plating game and not knowing consciously what TRP is, before I met an hb9 in a day game session, whom I gradually fell in love with, and oneitis followed because at first she was very into me, and seemed like she wasn't only interested in sex (had not shown much abundance and dgaf mentality like the rest) so her value was below mine while at that given time I had no abundance or totally high smv, and even though she was a solid 9. At least when dressed hot and with make up on (otherwise an 8) I was playing around with other women when I met her, until after the course of a few months she played the cat string on me. And I bit the bait. I commited.
The relationship started going to shit and was destructive as I started realising she was extremely bipolar and had daddy+mommy issues, her older sister being a total slut, and her brother sometimes abusing/hitting her when he was drunk and in rage etc. - She started treating me like shit. Like all the examples TRP users post about girls having guys in oneitis status and walking all over them.
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After this drama I finally broke free when I decided to end it.. but that's a story for another day. What is important is what I tried to do and where I lead my self next.
For a year or so even after having discovered TRP I would still think about her, and wanted to communicate, I did sometimes, I had sex with her again only to realise after a few times I'm wasting my time and energy on someone who is no longer into me(maybe never even was, could be that I gave her affection she didn't have at home growing up).
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It so happens I moved on, came back to my hometown and slowly but steadily started growing my family business up, which is now transfered in my own name regarding legal matters. It all happened when I had that boom again, at a time I felt frustrated, and sick inside for not being me. For not being the best of me. I started eating right, not all at once but eventually also hit the gym, purchased new more appealing threads, grew facial hair and finally decided to get the best hairstyle matching my face and style. Practiced gaming, met girls, kept reading trp all at the same time to not slip and let abundance I had been gradually developing go, had always outcome independence which is a very important factor in men's lives today. Got my self a few plates, and had the fun of my life I never happened to have before even with the knowledge of PUA's into my brain.
Eventually, one of my plates showed ltr characteristics, I checked and still check for red flags. I noted the imporant LTR like bits a girl must have before you enter a relationship and some of my logistics:
• She will always come to see me if I tell her to, if she has something important she will make space before or after the event just to visit.
• Complies with almost everything I ask her.
• Makes me food and I love it(shows that she cares and wants to take care of you)
• On my name day and other days she will try on her own to make it a special occassion
• We went our first date on my name day and she already purchased a little gift as we were still not close enough but did show lots of interest.
• Confesses feelings often/or when I give her the flip to.
• Doesn't bust my balls or is a bitch about meaningless crap/never gives the "we need to talk" stuff.
• Understands I am a high value man because many women are attracted and some have probably already shown it, tries to be stand out so I choose her instead of bitching around about other girls.
• Has in her mind I might be fucking other girls or willing to if she's not respecting me, but also connects and shows deep affection and scarcity
• Most important bit: After amazing intercourse, I talked to her about my feelings, being honest and not in a needy way like*I love you* *I want to be with you forever* and crap like that, I spoke about some of my thoughts and deeper feelings that start growing inside me for her and that I really care about her ( At this point I thought I had lost it and she's going to vanish any moment but she still hasn't) The KEY point here is that I might have spoke to her about MY feelings, but kept acting as I was BEFORE that and didn't change my FRAME towards her.
Now these are just some observations I made, after improving my relationship game much and applying dread to her for quite along time since we met until we started doing things people do in a relationship without noticing it. The last bullet point ( • ) I mentioned above, was a very dangerous and some may say slippery thing to do, but I think I nailed it right.
I was afraid of going into LTR, and expressed this to her and the reason "I recently broke up with someone and I'm not saying I wouldn't get into a relationship with someone again..but I want to be selective, and honest with the other person. She also has to keep some standards I have satisfied." Thus making her try more to please me and we come to good terms eventually. Etc.
The point of this post is to show you that if you are in such a position, and you are more LTR oriented than spinning, TRP is a toolbox favoring those who are not commiting and are free of everything, but ltr is a byproduct. It's not your goal, not your ultimate goal. But if you're wondering if you really can and want to go into deeper waters with a girl, test her out, keep spinning, and when it's time it will show, and don't be afraid to discuss some feelings over time provided you keep acting as you were before, that means RED PILLED and don't break frame. Beware not to slip at this point.
This being my personal opinion from experience, I'm very open to discuss with users.
Edit: in the first mentioned relationship I was still relatively new to pick up and game, and also blue pilled as fuck but I tried everything with this girl during my oneitis, even after trp and I still believe she's bipolar and a shitty person. Don't invest in mood swingy girls.
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adonai1828 5y ago
If I may... this isn't an ideal place to ask for relationship advice, if you read the handbook you'll notice the founding members were completely against relationships because they couldn't keep a woman from cheating on them and most of the members here follow them blindly while pretending to be the alpha male (aka, the leader)
Not that you won't get good relationship advice here, from what I've seen though a majority of the guys here came here after being cheated on and will basically give you something to the extent of "bitches aint shit but hoes and tricks" while they judge you for your "oneitis"
Aesthetic_God__ 5y ago
Yes I agree, I was like them without being cheated on (as far as I know or don't know) following them blindly, but I've worked a lot of years on my inner and outer game. Trp stands correct in many points but I think the whole unplugging thing is extreme, the AWALT etc. But these guys were from the USA where divorces got higher by women, so I guess fair play. Not all women are bipolar or narcissistic etc.
KeffirLime 5y ago
How she treats you in regard to the shit going on in her life is a great indicator of her perception of you.
If she takes out the shit happening to her on you it's because she's doesn't trust you as the leader or the high value rock that she desires.
If she confides in you and comes to you for comfort and advice, her safe space, away from the madness in her life, then she see you as her leader, her rock amidst the storm.
Aesthetic_God__ 5y ago
She was treating me like the latter, saying she loves me and felt safe in my arms and crap
but at times she was really bitchy and tried to make me believe to lies. Played with my mind. This was after a few months and especially when I understood she wanted to stray away.
Nonetheless my game was shit then. And I was blue pilled af.
KeffirLime 5y ago
Never listen to what she say, watch what she does.
If she's acting like wild dog instead of a sweet puppy, there's problems
Aesthetic_God__ 5y ago
This is what I'm saying up in my post. Exactly this.
One time she said I. Love you and all hugs and kisses, and a few hours later acting like a bitch for no reason.
Aesthetic_God__ 5y ago
Anyway the post is about another subject. this is just my background what about it? I used it for an introduction to relationship subject and what I was going to say later
KeffirLime 5y ago
It's a good learning point, having a failed relationship and then a successful relationship, while evaluating the difference in your behavior and the different behavior it elicits in your partner is about the best learning you could get.
Aesthetic_God__ 5y ago
Ah.. I see. Good then I understand.
Well in my current relationship the girl even opened up to me about her dad being tough and acts like I'm her rock to stand on,
without demanding things from me or busting my nuts about it. I guess it's good then?
KeffirLime 5y ago
Definitely a positive sign.
okczq 5y ago
Thanks for the post. I think there is alot of mixed opinions on LTR stuff on here but I like to see it.
Ultimately there is a good formula for spinning plates. lift, frame, abundance ect. There isn't really a set formula for LTR's. Lots of different things can work or not work. You can have a HB9 who is absolutely head over heels for a very average mid-tier dude with nothing special to offer, and it will just work for them. Or you can be a celebrity and still have all kinds of issues.
From what I've found, how into you she is and what she does to show it to you are just superficial things, they can and do change quickly. It's really about what makes her tick. And the type of chicks that fall hard for a jacked dude who gives her feels/dread typically aren't the most stable, and sadly that is the vast majority of the hot ones.
As women age, physical looks tend to be directly correlated to time/effort spent maintaining physical looks, and time/effort spent maintaining physical looks tends to be directly correlated with issues/crazy bitch shit. The mostly stable, good LTR candidate girls typically aren't going to look the same as the bipolar chick who spends 2 hours every day at the gym and drinks juice for 2/3 of her meals - but your dick sure knows which one it wants.
[deleted] 5y ago
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okczq 5y ago
I wasn't talking specifically about your situation, just in general.
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But I will if you want.
>Well she has a bulk shredded bodybuilder in her social circle but feels no attraction to this guy
You don't really know. AWALT. He could have already nexted her, she could be telling you what she thinks you want to hear to lock you down. At this point, it's irrelevant though.
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>Shit tests are proof she's super attracted.
Of course. With a plate that's all you need. With a LTR you're gonna need more.
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Women with a very active hamster are not going to be good in relationships. You want someone more stable who isn't going to be constantly starting shit/ bugging you/getting into shenanigans. It takes alot of perspective to find what you want in a LTR and you can only learn that by trying.
You're also going to bang hotter plates for sure. The notion that you're going to spin plates and then LTR your hottest plate is a fools errand (not saying this is you, just general advice)
Aesthetic_God__ 5y ago
Didn't tell me nothing lol her best friend was his girlfriend some time ago lol Usually women in my country won't fuck or date a guy who was her friends boy. Maybe I'm wrong.
okczq 5y ago
ah a girl code situation. As with everything else relating to females, YMMV
Dark_T100 5y ago
this post is way too menstrual and long holy shit. this is something thats been asked and answered many times on the sidebar. you dont talk about your feelings generally. she is not interested in you showing weakness. also dont fuck crazy bitches and delete this garbage post
adonai1828 5y ago
if she's not interested in my feelings, aka "weakness," she can go fuck herself, maybe that's just me tho... ima show my feelings either way, ima "show weakness," if someone doesnt like it idgaf, if a chick quits talking to me cause im too emotional idgafff im onto the next chick, yaknow?
just a thought to add here, before someone gets the wrong idea that its not ok to be emotional or show feelings, like that somehow makes you a beta or a "low valued target on the sexual market..." fuck all that, how many chicks wanna sleep with drake? a lot, man, a lot, and hes always gettin emotional
two-acorn 5y ago
Agreed.
What I read in this post:
I met a girl who is Totally Disney & Not Like the Rest ^TM. I really mean it this time guys! Butterflies!
I indulged her with my fee fees. By which I mean, I indulged myself, as I feel totally alone in this cruel universe, as many true men do, so decided to dump some luvey wuvey shit on her.
Dark_T100 5y ago
im the original commenter. I read on sex god method that you should alternate between telling her you care about her and how she is your little slut / her pussy belongs to you - only while you're fucking her and have her close to cumming. I think this is the only appropriate time to let something somewhat related to your "true feelings", as long as shes reciprocating. thoughts?
two-acorn 5y ago
Yeah that makes sense. Look, personally, I don't live my life as a constant machiavellian calculation.
But yeah. Deep emotional NLP/ state drifting/ etc is useful. It's the sappy guys that just "need" (for themselves) to dump their fee fees out that end up creating some repulsion.
jonpe87 5y ago
You can feel this shit in your gut, you know when she is in and when she is out
Aesthetic_God__ 5y ago
Exactly, you can feel it. Men's guts rarely lie unless you're suffering from paranoid disorder, like me for example.
LandoChronus 5y ago
No.
Glad we got that sorted.
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adool444 5y ago
"I don't know if I wanna be in an LTR" is not talking about your feelings. That is literally what girls want to hear when they say they want a guy who expresses his feelings. Try telling her about being bullied as a kid or how you struggled with women before or any insecurity and see how that goes. I get talking feelings doesn't mean "whining" but what you did was the safest thing ever.