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- Hide Preview | 23 Comments | submitted 8 months ago by portablespeaker [Post Locked]

A letter to my daughter,

The more you act like a lady, the more he'll act like a gentleman.

I hope that I will not and have not raised you to be offended in the slightest by this phrase. The subject of that phrase is you, because you are who is important and special, but more importantly because you are a woman and not a man.

Do not be like those other women that get offended from a statement that defines who you are, as a woman, and make it not about being a woman. In a world, where people will say the phrase The more you act like a "good person", the more "others" will act like a "good person". is more appropriate and correct. But why? Where are YOU in that phrase? Yes, you are a person. But more imporantly, you are a woman. Do not be like those other women that say they fight for women, yet strip their lives and the lives of others of being a woman and what makes them a woman in the first place.

If you become like those offended women, your life will never be truly happy. How can one be truly happy, when all you do is try to find negativity. Their mindset has become so warped that they even see negativity, where there is not. The first thought they should have of that phrase should just be that you act like good person and others will toward you. There is nothing negative about being a man or woman from that. But their mindset has made them think that it must have a sexist connotation. Yet, instead of thinking about it in a positive aspect, they go for the negative. Instead of it being a phrase that should empower women because their actions have a direct effect on the man, their thought is one that puts women down further.

Fight for equality, but understand that things can be different and equal at the same time.

Because I will tell your brother the same. For him to not be offended in a world that continuously tells him to be chivalrous, because that is what makes him a man.


Your father.

***I saw this post come up which prompted me to write this letter. It is very disheartening to see. I have been seeing this subreddit come up at times in the past and a lot of the times comments are disgusting. So after that post I searched for other women related subs to see how normal that attitude is. All the female advice subreddits I found are almost equally troubling. Then I found this sub and it was like a relief that there are women like you here too. I post here to see if I could get some feedback. Thank you.

[-] Flockofpuppies 41 Points 8 months ago

When a woman says "All men are dogs", guess what she finds? Dogs!

Call it karma, law of attraction, rising to your expectations, call it whatever, but you attract what you are.

[-] stacysmom40 17 Points 8 months ago

I was raised being told “Men are pigs. They only want one thing and they will tell you anything in order to get it.” This came from both my mother and my father. I’m sure they thought they were protecting me. I wish they hadn’t drilled that into my head. It’s been a hard road to recover from the misandry I grew up with.

[-] lady-brett_ashley 16 Points 8 months ago

This is posted on a school wall in Texas and people are losing their ever loving minds on it.

I saw a post online talking about it and I was relieved that some people still understand this to be true.

[-] fumblesRPW 14 Points 8 months ago

Oh my goodness, the comments on that xx post are depressing. ????

[-] SSapplejack 9 Points 8 months ago

this is amazing. Thank you for writing it.

[-] organicsunshine 6 Points 8 months ago

This statement is another way of stating the golden rule. "Do unto others as you woukd have done unto you". People are stupid for being upset about this. Reflect on the other wall the opposite... Act like a gentleman and she will act like a lady... ooohhh scandal!

[-] girlwithabike 11 Points 8 months ago

It also puts the ball in our court. Girls decide by their behavior how boys will behave (or at least treat them).

It's only sexist and weak if you want to view from a victim's lens.

[-] loneliness-inc 2 Points 8 months ago

Reflect on the other wall the opposite... Act like a gentleman and she will act like a lady... ooohhh scandal!

Except that it doesn't work that way. Guys acting like gentleman don't necessarily inspire girls to act like ladies. This is the sad story of the nice guy.

[-] BewareTheOldMan 3 Points 8 months ago

Key Line - "The more you act like a lady, the more he'll act like a gentleman."

A pretty simple, succinct, straightforward message and good, sage fatherly advice.

Makes you wonder why anyone would be offended...

[-] portablespeaker 1 Point 8 months ago


If I see the phrase... The more you act like a gentleman, the more she'll act like a lady.

I wouldn't be offended in the slighest nor should any man be. It is ridiculous people are and making the school take it down.

[-] [deleted] 8 months ago
[-] ThePussyPizza 3 Points 8 months ago

I love being a lady! I take so much pride in the fact that in my relationship I am feminine, caring, and sweet. I take pride in the fact that the man I love acts like a gentlemen and wants to become a better version of himself because I am a lady and there is power and beauty in being so.

[-] [deleted] 1 Point 7 months ago


[-] portablespeaker 1 Point 7 months ago

"be nice to others and others will be nice to you" is literally what it is saying. That is it. No need to imply anything or add words or nuances. That is it.

The problem is the negative people's minds make it more than it should be. Why does one's mind even go to make the interpretation of that negative? That is the mindset/mental issue that is wrong with those people.

We have a neutral statement. That can be made to be interpreted as good or bad, positive or negative. Yet, they interpret it as bad and negative. That is where their mind goes, which shows how they must view other aspects of their life.

If mentally, they can see this neutral phrase and see the negative in it... how are they going to handle when something truly negative comes their way. That is the issue. It is a horrible and weak mindset.

Movies, books, etc push the guy to be chivalrous. Mentally strong, happy, positive people do not see that and interpret that as "why does it only have the guy open the doors, pay for the meals, etc". They just see that being chivalrous is just something a man can do that can be seen as better. He doesn't have to open doors or pay for meals, but if he does its good on him. They do not take being chivalrous to be interrupted as "why do I have to do that for a girl when she doesn't do it? why do I have to pay for the whole meal and not half?"

Let's say you have a daughter, who saw that phrase. If you raised your daughter strong, she will see that statement as neutral and positive (much like the women in this sub). If you raised your daughter weak, she will see that statement as negative.

As a parent why would you want your child to see a neutral phrase, and have them mentally think the most negative way possible for it?

[-] [deleted] 1 Point 7 months ago


[-] portablespeaker 1 Point 7 months ago

You keep assuming the negative in your mindset.

causal link between the behaviour of the woman and the behaviour of the man.

[-] pearlsandstilettos 1 Point 7 months ago

I'm going to end this. /u/fiakergulasch this is not a debate sub. If you do not understand the values of RPW then you need to lurk more.

[-] [deleted] 8 months ago
[-] pearlsandstilettos 1 Point 8 months ago

No one here cares about brainwashed arguments. Learn to think for yourself beyond what your professors indoctrinate into you.

[-] SpookyJuice96 1 Point 8 months ago

What a strawman. That saying is clearly referring to normal consensual relationships, not sexual assault. I don’t know what made you jump to conclusions like that, especially one that is so drastically and obviously incorrect.

[-] [deleted] 8 months ago
[-] [deleted] 1 Point 8 months ago


[-] pearlsandstilettos 7 Points 8 months ago

Comments like that are predictable. As the OP states:

If you become like those offended women, your life will never be truly happy.

In any case, it's removed and the commenter has been escorted out. (And likely back to TwoX to mock us).