Yes. A lot of people I know are in relationships that resulted from dating apps. Please keep in mind, most of these people attended law school with me and are in the legal profession. I also know several medical students or those in their residency who use the app. All of us work really hard and either had limited time to socialize or were looking to date people outside of our professional and social and professional circles. It's all about how you use the app and setting expectations at the very beginning with people you meet. Choose your pictures carefully and make sure your bio implicitly indicates that you have RPW values. It may take a really long time and many bad dates, but it's certainly possible to find a LTR. For some reason the vast majority of LTR that I'm aware of have come from Bumble. I also know people who have had some success with Coffee Meets Bagle and The League.

If you ginover and read TRP you'll see posts from several different types of men.

There are women haters, players, super etas trying to be more attractive to women, men that have had sex with hundreds of women, and kissless virgins.

I'm older than most there, I've been married and divorced, had a horrible custody battle, but I still like and enjoy women, am not mysogynistic, and do very well with women.

Which has led to a few of the younger posters consulting me through private messages for advice and to vent their frustrations.

Listen, there ARE ambitious young men out there who want to marry a woman who is a virgin or at the very least hasn't slept with a whole lot of men. My girlfriend and I are both 39, she's been divorced too-- I have no illusions nor do I ask questions about her sexual history. Besides, at my age, meeting a virgin is the last thing on my mind.

THAT SAID, you can find men who are interested in that.

Now, it's not gonna be a guy like me. I met my girlfriend on OkCupid. We had sex the first night. She told me she never does that, just a couple other times (I didn't believe her at first but do now-- not that it mattered to me, as I've definitely done that many times).

The point is we have similar values.

I think you can find people with similar values on dating apps. I'm hesitant about Tinder. Less so about Bumble. OK Cupid is pretty good. There's also Hinge and Meet Mindful. I tried coffee meets bagel and it was awful.

The one thing I would caution against: make sure you're not just somebody's conquest. And once you ARE in a relationship, do your damn homework and find out how to be great in bed. Men need to develop skills. For women, this is the case but to a lesser extent. Enthusiasm goes a LONG way.

There will be a lot of trial and error if you use dating apps. Emphasis on the error.

If you’re going for the most attractive men on those, unless you’re stunning yourself, you will constantly be relegated to a plate by using Tinder or Bumble.

I think Coffee Meets Bagel is probably the best one for dating. I am male so I don’t know the age of the men on there, but most of the women are between 24-28. So that is on the upper end of your dating range if the men are similar.

You would definitely be one of the younger users, though, which is an advantage for you.

Is it possible to find an LTR off apps like Tinder or Bumble? Sure. Anything is possible. I managed it.

Is it likely? No. Not even remotely.

If you're keen on using an app, my recommendation has always been OkCupid, because you have the space to mention things like wanting comittment, not being interested in hookups, etc. Furthermore, people who match with you on sites like that are more likely to be ones who share your values, because you can answer questions to rate your compatibility based on different issues.

No dating app is perfect, but there are some that would be more likely to work better than others. And especially if you're a virgin I would avoid Tinder. Pretty much any longterm, committed relationship that comes out of there will be a fluke. And I say this having met my longterm, committed boyfriend off Tinder. Avoid it.

I'm a virgin, but I have recently abandoned the belief of saving sex till marriage when I realized how impractical it was given the times (also realized this partially because of you guys).

Noooooooooo!

Being a virgin is an unbelievable advantage for a LTR. Sure, it's a disadvantage for a short fling due to lack of experience, but it seems like a short fling isn't what you're after.

Given that, I think I align with RPW on almost everything, including on the subject of sex being important to satisfying my future Captain.

You don't need any sexual experience to enter a LTR. In fact, for marriage, it's best to marry the man who takes your virginity. What you do need is enthusiasm and receptivity in sex. You don't need sexual experience for either.

Dating apps in general are skeezy, but I'd say the potential for finding a LTR varies depending on the area. If you keep your geographical radius tight enough to only match with other students at your own university (or the other university), your mileage may vary. I found that meeting grad students on dating apps felt a lot less sketchy and their expectations and goals were a lot more traditional, compared to meeting other young professionals in the city.

If you do want to use these apps, OKC > Bumble > Tinder for finding LTRs, IMO.

You don't have to sleep with every man you date, and for that reason, I think dating apps are a great way to quickly gain experience without increasing your N-count. That being said, be careful! Always meet your dates in public, don't give your number out too quickly, and don't be afraid to block or un-match people you don't like.

Your chances of developing a LTR heavily depend on what app(s) you use, but they also depend on what you bring to a relationship, what kind of boundaries you set, and how good you are at vetting.

IMO no. Most men will put up a front online to get into your pants. You can see who someone is in person better it may be harder but the rewards are higher. If your a 5 online you will attract less attractive and less ambitious men in droves high SMV will likely overlook you to chase after people in their cohort. If your a 5 in person your personality and feminity can shine and you can attract a higher value mate. Online you handicap yourself for convenience.

I met my boyfriend (soon to be fiancé) on Bumble!!! I also was a Virgin when I met him, and we didn’t have sex until after 10.5 months of being in a relationship.

There are definitely guys on Bumble/Tinder that just want to hook up but it is possible to find someone with the same views as you!! I was always very up front with guys that I matched with and it worked out perfectly!

(btw I’m 20, in college, in a sorority, attractive, and my boyfriend is 22, graduating college in May, in a fraternity, and going to Law School in the fall- so we’re a normal couple)

Just my 2 cents but one has to be a special kind of stupid to lose his virginity to a tinder hookup. I would stay with the original plan. Keep it for marriage. Heavily increases your SMV and more importantly - it will very positively increase your overall happiness (less sexual partners == happier marriage).

I'd filter some of the comments you're getting here.

First, waiting for marriage is worth it. Society (and media) will have you think there are no men out there who will wait for it, but there most definitely are .. you just need to know where to look and be able to weed out the bad ones.

WRT to online dating, I think the misnomer is that you find people online and know right off the bat whether you'd be compatible with them. The truth about online dating is that it is a means for you to connect with potential partners. That's it. It's a remote, electronic club.

You still need to vet and filter everyone who "comes up and talks to you" just as you would in a bar. I think online dating really works well when 1) you know what you're looking for, and 2) you know how to distinguish it when you see it. I agree that most people (men) out there will be trying to get in your pants, but that holds true for whether you are looking in clubs or online (and honestly, probably in church too). There's just a higher chance you'll find a like-minded person in church than in a club.

But you can filter search results with online dating apps based off religious beliefs, etc., and just straight up tell any possible matches that you are holding off on sex until marriage. If they jump ship early, you both were saved from wasted time.

I'll also second an app like OKC or Match over something like Tinder or Bumble (the latter two are geared much more towards hooking up, and don't allow you to really get a feel for someone's personality, goals, values, etc.).

Hope that helps.

u/loneliness-inc is Spot-On, dead center accurate on points 1, 2 & 3.

My added advice and experience is that dating apps are mostly junk and full of people looking for sexual trysts and hookups that MIGHT lead to a possible relationship - and that's a big IF.

The other part to online dating is the sea of waste that is the general "leftovers" from recently divorced folks, womanizers, promiscuous women, and the like...

You almost need certification as a behavior specialist to determine someone who has genuine interest in relationships and marriage while sifting thorough online apps.

It's not impossible, bit highly improbable to find a suitable life-mate.

Don't overplay it, but virginity is so rare that it offers an advantage in the husband/father search.

You're in college - a lot of women miss this opportunity to find a solid match in college while studying alongside this vast pool of eligible men. There are certainly many who expect an immediate hookup, but there are also the rare few who will respect you as a person who seeks a serious life-partner.

I find dating apps dreadful. Some nice men, but 99.99% incompatible. Sorry. I think I’d have better luck meeting someone on the subway.