It's better to text back fast than play games. If you're available, respond. Don't think you have to set a timer to reply. Sometimes you will be busy and won't be able to respond right away. Just be honest.

I don’t think most men can tell if a woman is playing hard to get vs. just blowing them off. In this promiscuous society of ours, I would just assume she’s your typical hypergamous thot, drunk on male attention via dating apps, and therefore is not taking my interest in her seriously. I’d bail at even the slightest indication that she’s not interested, but that wouldn’t mean her not responding to my texts instantly—it would mean her not responding at all. I always treated the early stages of a relationship as a ping-pong match. If I called a woman, and left a message, the ball was officially in her court—no return call, there’s no second call from me. I think all men should do the same.

is that just me projecting/female solipsism?

Exactly. That's what is attractive to you, so you assume that's what would be attractive to them.

it implies that they have nothing else going on.

Why on earth would a man care about how busy you are? Or like you more if you had less time for him?

Let me put this in perspective so that you understand. Men spend their lives in a sea of disinterest, while women get hit on and checked out all the time. Men are starved for affection and attention, they work hard in their whole lives just so that they can become someone that women will notice.

They expect disinterest from women, it's the norm for them, and so they only pursue if they notice something other than that. But what they really want is someone who will be passionate about them, someone who will obsess about them.

Obviously the over obsessed girl is a thing, otherwise there wouldn't be a meme about it. But the vast majority of women tend to go too far in the other direction and tend to think that if they are too busy rock climbing, drinking shots, saving puppies, and closing deals to text them that they will be more attractive for having things going on in their lives.

No, they will assume you are disinterested or that you are too busy for them, and look for someone with less going on. It's even worse if you pretend to have things going on so that you contact them less. A woman who has a lot going on, but spends effort into the relationship with any spare moment she has is going to be vastly more attractive.

Men want to be the most important thing in your life, and obviously at the initial stages that won't happen right away, but that is their goal and they will gravitate towards women who have a window open for that to be a possibility.

Just a few ideas here...

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Good: knowing your value and having high standards

Bad: pretending to be hard-to-get by acting disinterested

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Good: having an interesting, active life

Bad: flaking out on a date last-minute or without much explanation/apology or clear interest in setting another date

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Good: flirting with him, being attentive and receptive to him, being sweet with him

Bad: dominating the dynamic by making all the first moves or always being the one to ask him out

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Good: being forthcoming with your schedule and friendly in setting boundaries -- "Sorry, I can't go that night, I have a yoga class, but I'd really like to see you this week if we can do another day?"

Bad: dropping everything in your life to see him, showing you don't value your time or self-care

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Good: having friends and an active social life

Bad: texting other people when you're with him

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Good: being friendly and sweet in your texts to him. "Hey! I hope you're having a great day at work. can't wait to see you later tonight. xo"

Bad: being clingy with texting, expecting all-day text-a-thons, sending too many texts that necessitate a response, especially about things like who he was with last night or during times when he's probably busy. Use common sense. "Hey! How's work going?"...[no response] "Hey, did you see my text earlier?"

If a girl played "hard to get", I would lose interest. Just be real and cut the stupid games. It comes off as immature to me. Maybe I'm at a point where I feel if you can't directly communicate what you want in a relationship, you aren't ready. Having standards and taking it slow are fine, as long as things are progressing.

I don't know the official RPW consensus, or if there is one, but I can give my view! :)

I would say that "playing" hard to get is playing games, and in general, playing games is not a good thing. To "play" hard to get means that are you aren't, in fact, hard to get - when, really, as a high-value woman, we should have standards and requirements. It's better to genuinely be high-value, and there won't need to be any "playing."

Definitely be feminine over masculine, even in early dating. But also, be your own person. Be busy! Have a social life, go to the gym, have hobbies, spend time with family. Don't be overly available, and don't play games or lie. Try to fill up your life and have a full and enriching day, so that you actually have a real routine. Exercise, meditate, whatever it is. Even if it's taking time for yourself. It's healthy, and it shows that you have a life. Don't blow him off for no reason, be genuinely interesting and have interesting hobbies.

Men do like the chase, and should be able to do the pursuing. They are the active, out-going energy. This will set the stage for the future in a good way. Be receptive, but don't have an empty life. It might be a red flag that you would be too dependent or needy as a girlfriend, or that you can't make or keep friends. But if he senses you are blowing him off, or faking being busy - or worse, catches you in some kind of a lie - it's also bad. Hope that makes sense!

Have standards and have a life and people consider you "hard to get"

Here's a standard marketing tactic. We perceive things that are in short supply as being more valuable. I don't see any problem with texting back quickly but don't always be available to text. After you've done with the convo be like "ok it was great talking I'm going to go and have a bath now".

Don't hang out all the time and when you are on a date, pick a time to leave and stick to it. Leave him wanting more, don't wait for the conversation to be exhausted.

You don't need to play any games with this. If he's interested in you and you're being pleasant and receptive, it'll probably drive him wild.