So I've learned in the space of a few hours that the 3 women ive ever really 'loved' are essentially dead to me. I used to do pretty well going after women just for the hookups. It's been a long time since I really jumped into that world, busting my ass building a business etc. I know it's terrible for my brain, but for a while now ive held up a few exes as "what I need to look for", and I'm hung up on one in particular just because she was my first true infatuation. For various reasons, ive just learned that the three ive held up on a pedestal are forever inaccessible to me. I don't want to be frustrated by this, but its fucking me up right now.
I'm fucking pissed that this is affecting me at all, but it is. Do I just go get some strange or what? How do I fix my perception of this shit?
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