Hello, I'm new to TRP, started by reading the handbook,
About myself:
I'm a young (early 20's) software engineer, I live in Middle East, am an Introvert and communicating to people (not only women) IRL is pretty hard for me.
I have a pretty good income, I make 20 times more than a bank employee, I'm not overweight, but I'm not fit either, I have a small belly which I'm working on it.
At this point I'm pretty sure I'm a Beta (Alpha wanna be).
Here is some background to the scenario:
I knew this girl from University, she was my classmate 5 years ago, I was the only male in the class with 8 females. I didn't had much interaction with my classmates back then (I still don't) but I had done some deeds for her in the past.
2 weeks ago, I replied to one of her story, asking her where did she bought her coat and the conversation started (This part I guess gonna be boring):+ "Can I ask when you bought your coat?"
-
"Hello, I haven't bought it recently ?❤️"
-
"I want to buy a present for one of my friends, I don't know what to do, and I believe you have an amazing taste"
- "Thanks Love ❤️" (I reacted to this message with ?)
"Have you seen these IG pages?"
...
In general, at this point I directly asked her if she helps me, and she said We can't meet IRL to buy smth cause of Corona situation
She didn't replied for 2 days, I messaged her again, thanking her for her help, She replied, apologized, said she forgot, and said congrats,
I tried to play and continue the conversation, told her It's not me that you should say congrats to, and I have some questions,
She again replied "Congrats, Anyway, go ahead and ask".
I asked "What would you say If I tell you I like you?"
She replied with something like "WTF ?"
I've seen her message, waited for a day, and then replied to her "You just made me lose $100"
(I had a scenario which in that I would tell her that I had a bet with my friend that I can't hit on you easily and you won't respond to my "I like you" message, but you did)
She didn't ask what $100, but she got super mad, like very mad, Sent me a pretty long message (5 freaking paragraphs), Telling that she only responded to me cause I was her classmate, and asked why when I am a friend of your ex girlfriend, you dare to send me such messages (me and my ex broke up 1 year ago, no contact in the last 2 months), Then she blocked me without giving me a chance to reply
The conversation took about 2 weeks, cause she only replied one message per day, so did I.
I thought it's going good (maybe it was), cause I was getting replies from her, Which part did I go wrong that made her block me after she put all that effort to write that long message?
I'm not mad, or sad, I mostly feel curious to see why this happened this way? what can happen next? Do I still have a chance?
[deleted] 3y ago
[--removed--]
DarkSuniuM 3y ago
Thanks for your answer,
I do read and I do make good money, My weaknesses (for now) are Fitness and Communicating which I'm trying to work on,
Beside getting off of the Instagram, anything else?
sillen102 3y ago
Ok, so let me get this right...you wrote to a girl on Instagram that you went in the same class with some years ago, who you never talked to much before, but who presumably saw you as a socially awkward beta male. You initiated the conversation, kept it friendly and casual with no hint to anything sexual or even remotely close to it what so ever.
Dude, you even asked her if it was ok for you to ask her a few questions! ASKED!! (talk about putting her on a piedestal!)! You asked her if she would give you permission to ask her something! C'mon man!!
And then out of the blue you ask "what she would say IF" you told her you liked her?!
There is absolutely zero surprise she got pissed and blocked you. You came off as super creepy!
Now, let's just get a few things straight first. You did not try The Red Pill! The Red Pill is not something you try. It is a lens through which you view the world. Being red pill aware allows you to see the truth and interpret social interactions and relationships as they are and not what most people are brain washed to believe. What you tried to try is GAME! Hitting on women is called game. That's what you think you tried, but actually didn't.
Now here is my analysis and advice to you:
The girl had an impression of you from when you went to class. And it wasn't a good one. It's foolish to expect that her image of you would change without her meeting you in person. Even if you changed dramatically she's not going to pick up on that though messages on Instagram. You never stood a chance what so ever.
Before going off and writing anything more do some reading. Start with "The Rational Male" by Rollo Tomassi. For game there are a few options but "The Mystery Method" is a good book to start with.
Stay off the internet when trying to meet women and go into the real world.
Socialise in the real world. I don't know which country you live in in the Middle East. I know that some countries can be troublesome to be hitting on girls without getting your hands chopped off by her brothers. But if you live in a more liberal one then just go out and hit on women. You will fail. You will get rejected a lot. But if you read up on game in the meantime and try out different stuff you will learn eventually.
DarkSuniuM 2y ago
Woah, very descriptive, Thanks
I see your point,
Also I live in Iran, It's more liberal but we also have the police,
Need to find an alternative to lifting, My back discs are in a fucked up situation, I used to do Parkour, and I got injured (7 years ago) and I wasn't able to do hard workouts since then.
sillen102 2y ago
Start slow and try doing exercises that don't tax your back. No dead lifts and stuff like that. But I bet you can still do stuff like chest presses, shoulder presses, biceps curls, triceps extensions, lat pulldowns and probably even some leg presses. Do what you can.
Go to the gym and try exercises with low weights and if they make your back hurt then stop and don't do them. If you don't feel any pain in your back, then add some more weight. Take the time to find what works for you.
A good friend of mine has back issues and has had for many years. He trains several times per week and says it actually helps him with his back issues. But he is very careful with what exercises he does.
Just as another anecdote. I do Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, besides the weight lifting, and my coach is an almost 60 year old Brazilian guy that has had several back surgeries after a motorcycle accident. He has a metal plate that has three of his vertebras fixated so he can't even move properly. He still kicks everyones ass in class!