Bro i wish my gfs body count was 2. Read my post history if you want the opinion of someone who's been in similar shoes.

You dont have retroactive jealousy. RJ is when you're fixated on her past and constantly comparing/contrasting to a point of obsession. Dont listen to all the BS about OCD and onenitis etc.

I would have recommended sticking it out while refining yourself and acquiring skills for your future wife. Either way dude, some just dont want a girl thats been xyz with another dude its called preference. "Sloppy seconds" is subjective and if you couldnt bring yourself to look past it i applaud you for getting out while you still could!

Without any detailed knowledge of how your relationship was, I don’t know if what you did was the better choice.

If things were running smoothly, she was good to you outside the bedroom too, and you did vet her for a long enough time before committing (at least 6 months), I probably would not have dumped her. If she had to really earn the relationship and she is a good GF, within reason, that’s all you can reasonably hope for as a man.

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On one hand, you as a man absolutely do want to get the sexual best from a committed partner. If you weren’t able to raw dog her, but her ex could, she is in a way treating her ex better than you. This is something you are subconsciously realizing, and once you have realized it, you can’t get it out of your head easily. It’s not so much retroactive jealousy, as it is the realization that you are getting a worse deal than her ex did. She was younger, a virgin, and he rawdoggeed her. You don’t get those things no matter what.

This “calculation” in your head only enters the picture because you are committed with her. You wouldn’t give a shit if she was a club slut that you banged once and will never talk to again. And this “calculation” gets worse if you find out her ex was not as committed as you, or if he was a fat loser, or whatever. Ultimate death knell to her chances if you found out she also did anal and blew him, but wouldn’t do that with you.

(You also can’t just take her word that her ex is the one guy she has ever fucked before, as she has every incentive to “reduce” her N-count. But we leave that judgement to you, it’s your situation not ours.)

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On the other hand, getting sick from the pill is a real thing. And (assuming you really are her 2nd), is actually very good for western standards. As you get older, you are highly unlikely to find another woman with a lower N-count.

Would you rather that she actually is a girl that’s always on the pill and just raw dogs every other guy at the club? I think not. The fact that she tried the pill and isn’t always on it says that she actually does think somewhat seriously about what she does with her body.

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The thing I don’t like in this situation though is that truth was punished. Assuming she was telling the truth, you basically punished her for being honest. She would’ve been better off lying about that experience in her past, but she told the truth, and you broke up with her over it. After this experience, she is much more likely to lie to the next guy she is getting into a relationship with. Not blaming you here, you gotta look out for you. Just know that’s the future you have inadvertently contributed to.

I wish we just didn’t have this turbo slut situation in the West. I also wish what men and women wanted weren’t so often at odds with each other. But no matter what we wish, the way the universe is will not change.

Good sex matters. I have only done it raw for the last 20 years, because I like having sex with women not rubber bags. This decision does limit the pool of women I want to have sex with or who would like to have sex with me. It has also led to my having plenty of children. For me it makes sense because it is more pleasurable, more real and because if you are not ready to do the real act, then why play act going through the motions? That just leads to stimulating feelings that are supposed to be reserved for women nature would normally make very important figures in your life when you are just wasting time and feelings on unimportant people in your life.

However, in your case, I am not sure if you need to take such drastic action as dumping her. Its not like there are not lots of other methods of contraception that do not involve the particular pill she reacted badly to (or may simply have been ill at the same time as taking). If she is someone worth having in your life and you are someone worth having in her life, then surely you can try the other options first?

Forget the jealousy. It worked out differently when it was his turn. Its not like its about you and him competing. He is off the scene now and its your turn. In real life the only competition between men is to impregnate women. You either impregnate her or you are another guy who wasted his time and resources and failed. That is all nature is interested in. Beyond that sex is just for pleasure, release and bonding. These are not things to get hung up on.

Do not over invest your emotions in any woman you do not intend to make the mother of your children. They are not worth it. If you do, you are being a pussy beggar overvaluing casual sex, overvaluing your relationship to a woman you are just passing time with. Its just another form of gynocentrism, pedestalling the relationship with the prize woman. She is not the prize unless you claim her reproductive system to make a child for you. Otherwise she is just a drain on your resources in return for sex.

Forget the past and sex the sex you want.

I personally wouldn't be able to be some chicks' sexual second place in a committed relationship

I understand if you need time to get to know her body for a bit of time or whatever or find a rhythm and might not instantly be number one if she's been with someone for a while, but not receiving her best would just not be committed relationship material to me

For a recreational use chick to me it would be more about what I'm getting out of it but I would not want to receive less than previous partners

That being said you should wrap up your dick. Pregnancy and stds are not worth much of the risk.

Also man, most chicks have fucked without a condom. I've yet to meet one that has only ever wrapped it up

Bro I pretty much go raw will all my girls. It's risky but I had a vasectomy. I'm a huge fan of that intimacy.

Honestly if 8 knew that my girl let some other dude hit it bareback and not me, I wouldn't take it well. You should be having the sex you want. I guarantee that if you stayed, this would chew at you.

I say find someone that will be on the pill, but be careful!

Now I'm not calling bullshit on her end, but there's a lot more birth control methods other than the pill. She could look into that, or before I was snipped, I would go with spermicide foam. It's a smaller room marshmallow looking tablet that you push in her before you smash.

I would definitely clearly state what I want and why I'm stepping away. But I don't think that you're wrong emotionally.