Hi gents,
My LTR (26 and about to finish college) missed her period and the tests show that she's pregnant. We both acknowledge we made a mistake and should have taken more precautions to avoid an unplanned pregnancy. She immediately brought up that she doesn't want a child right now and wants an abortion. Although I also strongly support this, I have refrained from overtly trying to influence her choice by remaining as neutral and supportive as possible: we're in Europe so she has to follow a few steps (doctors visit, follow-up counselling session, informed consent) before she can take the pill. She has already made the necessary appointment to begin the process.
I (32, good CV/skills) have been planning to move abroad for the last six months and have the qualifications and means to do so and zero commitments - she knows this relationship comes secondary to my aspirations. It's just been a matter of figuring out where the best place to relocate to is. I currently don't have any obvious assets or good sources of income and don't buy her expensive things. Consequently, I don't think that she currently sees me as a potential provider. The relationship has been based on mutual sexual attraction and a strong emotional bond which eventually led us to being exclusive. We have decided to keep this matter private and not inform friends and family to avoid complicating the matter. While I am supporting her in this process and plan to continue the relationship, I am trying to prepare for the possible scenario in which she changes her mind within the next week and decides not to have an abortion.
Any suggestions on how to proceed over the next 4-6 weeks if she shows signs of changing her mind? She has already given me multiple reasons, one of which I won't mention here, why she doesn't want a child right now, so I haven't had to overtly say anything yet - it's obviously the rational choice. Do you have any suggestions on how to navigate this scenario while being supportive and avoiding actions that would overtly influence her decision?
- Agree and amplify, in a supportive way.
- Current circumstances are unfavourable (e.g. weak job market, political uncertainty, better opportunities abroad)
lambOfGod 6d ago
Focus on what you want. Also, stop being a fucking idiot and be in control of the birth. Although you are a corporate schmuck and think you have it good, you don't. Being an employee today is a bit better than being homeless but you are extremely easily replaceable. Even in CuckEurope. Try to get more financial legs to stand on.
It is a common mental masturbation for corporate cucks to think they have it better.
In regards to the girl, try to support her decision if that is what you want. You yourself said that this "relationship" comes second for you, understandable, but act accordingly. I suspect you actually don't have other options or plates to spin or you are too lazy to deal with that anymore.
Now, I know this is the rational thing to do, specially because you don't have a say in this since you were dumb enough to cum in a woman you don't want children with, but I would not consider a true LTR with a woman that doesn't want my child. Because she doesn't want your kids dude. Yes, she may yap about her career and shit which is legit as well in the western world, but the bottom line is that she does not want your child.
You don't want your child too, so act accordingly and stop pussying out of consequences.
[deleted] 1w ago
[--removed--]
MrSupreme 1w ago
Focus on your main goal of relocating. Kindly let her know you just won't be there for her and the baby,it is not the time for it.The abortion sounds good, just communicate accordingly.