So recently, college has been going decently. I was sick last week but am hanging out with my neighbor soon. I’ve since been scoping out campus and I’ve noticed some seriously hot chicks that no one approaches or talks to. A lot of them are just there alone, eating or waiting for the bus staring aimlessly.
Now that I’m feeling better, I want to get my plate roster going again since I haven’t had a solid one in almost a year. I should be getting into a frat aswell, but to be completely honest: I’m not too keen at the frat guys at my school. They’re ok, but not guys I’d really be friends with. I am also very confident in my ability to go out to bars and clubs to dance with chicks but I haven’t been successful with hook ups. Maybe I’m playing things too safe but idk, I haven’t been to the bar in a week.
My problem is: I don’t want to develop a reputation for cold approaching women. I get if I start sarging in a certain spot where everyone will notice, that will be an obvious bad thing. I recently have been talking to girls from my class and they all see me as a friend because they all mention their boyfriend mid convo (happened twice).
Not to mention, I’ve been getting iois like crazy on the bus. This one girl was staring me down whenever I looked at her. She started playing with her hair and everything. Gets off the bus and I approach her and say “hi :)” and she smiles too with good body language like “thanks for the approach” but she had a boyfriend. I smiled and wished her a good day. I’ve become way more ballsy than I was before because I gave up porn and masturbation. I haven’t busted a nut in 3 weeks and I refuse to unless it’s sex. It’s making me much more aggressive and fearless, I’d catch myself saying “eh, what the fuck is the worst that can happen?” And “I deserve SEX (not from anyone in particular but you get my point)”.
Should I still cold approach on college campuses? Everyone else here is wayyyy too dorky to even attempt talking to girls so I think that’s the norm around here.
Lone_Ranger 2 1y ago
Of course you should cold approach on campus. If you're a single man, you should be cold approaching at all times, everywhere.
But here's the thing - you have to be subtle. Just substitute the word 'cold approach' with 'friendly' and you'll be golden. Be friendly, chatty and fun with everyone. Don't escalate and be spergy and inappropriate - just be chatty and friendly and you'll soon learn to read the signals. Not every interaction results in a smash - in fact most don't. Don't focus on the "failures".
Also - don't waste time on 'frats' that you think are stupid - it won't work.
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Lone_Ranger 2 1y ago
You write "Approaching gets exhausting at some point"
That's only if you are putting too much effort in, and also being outcome dependent. The trick is to put almost zero effort into it and be totally outcome dependent. Women much much prefer low effort approaches - the do or die ones always get shot down because they are so needy and spergy, and hint of panty drying oneitis before you eve get started.
You also write "I tried the “subtle” approach. Girls still won’t chat to you if they are unattracted to you to begin with."
THAT'S THE ENTIRE POINT!!!! Girls that are unattracted to you will not chat with you. Now invert that logic. Girls that are attracted to you WILL chat with you. You see how valuable that is?
It means that is you are able to master the art of casual conversation, you will be able to filter the woman population into those that are and those that arent attracted to you. All it takes is 3 or so minutes of casual, low effort, non-committal conversation, to weed out those that find you attractive and those that don't.
This is how I managed things at uni. I didn't waste my time just chasing the top 5% hottest women that were not interested in me (and are a complete waste of effort and time anyway, due to insane entitlement issues) .... I was friendly polite and chatty to almost all women. Trust me, if a woman finds you attractive, they will let you know. And if a woman that is a 6 is giving you vibes and you're a 9, you can quite easily convert.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1y ago
I think you are seriously overestimating how much people give a shit or what their attention span is, while simultaneously underestimating how utterly preoccupied people are with their own lives and own problems
I'd say the only thing you should worry about is being a creep, which would only be the case if you had utterly shit game and bad social accumen and no ability to know when to leave a set that is unwanted
AbusiveFather1 1y ago
Yes
You said this a million times already, yet you still go on about you needing to join a frat
User4566 1y ago
I believe it’s because I feel like I’m the problem. I’m trying to force myself to like other people and be friendly.
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AbusiveFather1 1y ago
And I assume you’re doing that to not be ostracized by the community - but what community is that? A community of retards that you don’t even respect?
mattyanon Admin 1y ago
God forbid you get a reputation as a fun, sociable, outgoing guy who goes and talks to people.
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mattyanon Admin 1y ago
If you're attractive you'll be seen as sociable.
financehardo420 1y ago
Facts it’s only creepy if you’re ugly lol
User4566 1y ago
Saucegod has a point, people will know that I’m just trying to get laid.
financehardo420 1y ago
It’s college it’s literally a smorgasbord of sex. get after it dawg aren’t you like 6’3 or some shit lmfao
User4566 1y ago
I forgot about that. I keep hitting my head on the way out :(
mattyanon Admin 1y ago
No, they won't. Stop being so negative, it will not serve you well.
Learn to be more sociable and learn to care less what people think.
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User4566 1y ago
Well, attractive is definitely subjective. My neighbor cold approached me and is down to hang out, even going so far as to take Wednesday through Sunday off to hang out. Some chicks also don’t like me at all idk.
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