This HB6.5 has been giving strong IOIs the past couple weeks. Yesterday I had my shirt tucked in and I looked good in arms and especially shoulders. Ran into her when I stepped out of the classroom and she said "you look hot." Also teased her about skipping math class and her grades, and how she needs me to tutor. She kept laughing, even when I said "maybe with wine." Today I ran into her at the math center and she immediately said hello and "you look cute."
I wasn't sure to move on this before, but now I'm going to. This was our last convo we had as we walked towards our cars. First she told me how she hates leos, lol. So far every girl who has said that has shown IOIs. She wants to be my study buddy and that may mean access to her house (lives alone with her kid). I'm not walking into friendzone territory though, here's the convo:
her: hey, you said we may study together, when are we gonna do that
me: we won't, I prefer to study alone
her: aw man
me: but we can netflix and chill (I said this with a cheeky smile and locked eye contact as we were walking further apart)
her: oh, NO
She looked away and back at me twice as I was holding eye contact. Each time she looked back she giggled.
I think she's DTF, also doubt she's just doing this for attention because I've paid her 0 compliments. I need to set this up and not take forever to do so. I was thinking asking her in person next week to grab some drinks or do something indoors due to the cold. She's direct with me, should also I be more direct with her? For example, just asking her when she's free to watch a movie and drink? She's also a stoner, maybe I can be like "let me see your bong, I've never smoked." Maybe we hit up a bar so I can escalate then back to her place (assuming the kid isn't a problem). I'm trying to be efficient and already have her # and snap. She got both of em from me a couple weeks back to supposedly study. I think this detail is insignificant, she's still talking about my class high test score from the other week. She either wants to fuck or just use me to study, I think fuck but can't be sure.
Also got a # of a 6 and will start gaming her as she's receptive. Gonna try and be efficient with that.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1y ago
You're making this shit too complicated.
Pick a day to "study", use it as plausible deniability, and then escalate on a "study break"
You shot down her plausible deniability for a plain, "we're gonna fuck". Even if she's dtf you're making her an open slut if she says yes. Even a lot of sluts will say no to that because it's just too reputationally slutty even though everyone knows they're a slut already
It doesn't matter if you say it cheeky because you're not a 9 or 10. You're just pushing luck you don't have. Don't be don Juan, stick to the basics man
This is game 101 man. I don't know what your thought process is. You are snatching defeat from the jaws of victory
Edit: your game would literally be so much easier if you worked with what you were given to work with. You take what you are given with and do not naturally escalate. You take a triangle hole in game and try to ram a square through a triangle hole
Take what you are given and work with it.
Instead of saying you study alone, you could have negged her and asked how she would be able to help you learn or if you'd be doing all the heavy lifting. might have been slightly risky, but you went 100% full ass risk instead. Zero reason to do so if she was already interested enough to simply escalate normally
Also, you are continually operating outside of the bounds of the frame and smv you actually possess.
There is a realistic, accurate level of frame and smv you have (every guy has this natural zone, sometimes it's circumstantial. For example at my venue I have a significantly larger zone of frame and smv control than when I'm without skill and social proof)
But all of your field reports demonstrate a consistent pattern of operating outside of both. You think you're zone of both is metaphorically 10 feet out when you've got a 5 foot radius to metaphorically work in.
You need to do an utterly massive soul search of what your actual smv and ability to command a situation is because it is much lower than you are estimating
imtranscending 1y ago
There's also another reason why I didn't readily accept her offer (stated at the bottom). I was laughing when I first read this because it's probably true. So far you've been spot on. My dick feels the pain from these unfulfilled sexual urges.
I thought I was adhering to the basics. Being a Don Juan hasn't crossed my mind in a while. It's funny you keep referencing him because you know I've been reading The Book of Pook. I'm honestly just trying to be better than the day before.
Wow, I know I've done this multiple times. Remember me writing about that HB 7 inviting me to go clubbing/dancing with her. My reactions are consistently leading to these outcomes.
Part of the reason I shot her down was because she admitted she was "using" her last boyfriend for math help. It was a spur of the moment reaction, I wasn't quick to become used for math help with no fucks. That piece of information may or may not be key to this. What do you think? On the bright side, I'm not afraid of going full ass risk now. Better to have an overconfidence problem than an under confidence one.
Also to further prove your accuracy in this and my text game, yesterday I responded to a snap memory she put up from 5 years ago. She was in a sexy dress squatting with a stripper pole between her legs and looking back at the camera. I was tryna be flirty when I responded with "You got moves?" She just responded with "Ah" that doesn't seem good.
As far the soul searching part. I know my SMV is 6, and I don't delude myself into thinking otherwise. I know I was a 3.5-4 over a year ago and I know without a doubt I'll be a 7-8 in another year or two from now. I still don't act like a 7, but I suppose I can exude that level of confidence at times along with frame.
That's an interesting point about SMV perception (do I have that right?) and frame control. I probably overestimate my frame control. I did just that last night at a small church social teasing a HB5 I just met to the point where her body language displayed uncomfortable. Too much push there and improper calibration, I was a little in my head reuniting with all these people I haven't seen in over 5 years. I was trying too hard to re-establish myself as someone different and improved from the last time they saw me. Bad idea, I was in my own head.
So I do think I'm reaching regarding frame control and can still use work with social calibration. When I'm not in my head I think I get away with operating outside of my frame due to my charisma acting as a buffer. It's when my frame control also exceeds my charisma that I run into problems. (What do you think of that theory?)
I know I'm my biggest hinderance right now and I've already been working very hard to overcome that since it's been pointed out. Hopefully you can start to see that in my next few field reports. You help me a lot man, I can tell you wish success for me. As always, your responses are detailed and concise. Thank you.
mattyanon Admin 1y ago
+1
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1y ago
Always appreciate you Matty
financehardo420 1y ago
+1 as well.
Hit the nail on the head w plausible deniability
coolsocks00 1 1y ago
Think you guys are being overly negative here.
He put his foot in his mouth by not agreeing to her study proposal and building off it. Basic mistake, easily fixable.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1y ago
I'm not reacting to this isolated incident in my bluntness.
I am reacting to the totality of field reports I have read from OP, which warrant this reply. OP asks what we mean across a number of field reports and that is the deep dive I responded with
mattyanon Admin 1y ago
"Netflix and chill" means sex, so you triggered her ASD.
She's got a kid, which often means she is NOT dtf..... she might be playing for a relationship, which obviously sucks for you.
But you have a kid to manouvre around
No, you are a man. Make a plan and drag her along. She can negotiate the plan, but you should lead.
The kid WILL be a problem. Invite her to yours, which makes "get a baby sitter" explicit.
She's being flirty. You should escalate. But don't think that this means she is definitely down for no string attached fucking.
coolsocks00 1 1y ago
To be fair, women will often perfectly plan around kids' bedtimes and even babysitters to get some dick. Kids arent necessarily an issue. Just dont get too attached and keep building your rotation even if she puts out.
financehardo420 1y ago
Facts I’ve been talking to a milf and she wants me to come over when her ex husband has the kids lol
financehardo420 1y ago
You’re big chilling brotha just play it smooth lol. She wants your cock in and around her mouth. Her asking you to study w her was her polite way of asking to Netflix n chill lmfaoooo.
I say just hit her up and say hey wyd; wanna go over some math tonight? Etc etc. she’s a mom in CC; her math class can’t be that deeply important lmao n if it was she’d just hire a tutor or some shit
Peter_Henderson 1y ago
Single moms typically prefer men who are more stoic/stable and "safe" to be around.
This is because women that have a child have an automatic instinct to always be aware of the safety-level of her environment and she's 10x more aware of anything which comes across as "unsafe" (such as a slippery sidewalk or a bridge over water compared to a normal road above solid ground).
Here is a psychology lecture discussing it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pCceO_D4AlY