I would like realistic feedback from experienced or knowledgeable men about this "PUA video" posted 16 hours ago on r/SadCringe showing a guy getting rejected 2-3 times from cold-approaching
Link here: https://redd.it/yr6s76 +11k upvotes and over 1k comments
Am I correct that this is just a guy starting out learning PUA and that the reason he is so shy/awkward is due to the fact maybe he's never approached random women before at the mall and initiated a conversation?
If my assessment is correct, then it's totally 100% normal to be "painfully horrible" the very first 5-10 times and maybe this is a realistic portrayal of what an absolute, brand-new beginner looks like. Or is there something else I'm missing that you guys see but that I'm not seeing?
Thank you for reading.
RedPill115 1y ago
What is cringy about this video, other than the shy-nerd awkwardness of talking to people you don't know, which is exactly what you're trying to get over?
He talked to girls he didn't know. He held frame, he was friendly, he subcommunicated that he would go away if they wanted.
This is most normal video I've seen where someone does this, frankly.
pofkaf 1y ago
I think some context is missing here. The coach probably told the student to just approach women and tell them they're cute. That's it, nothing further.
So it seems awkward (he's just going up to women and complimenting them). But it does have a purpose. The purpose is to help the student overcome his approach anxiety. It's setting the building blocks for more advanced game.
Notice that he didn't get "rejected." How can he get rejected if he didn't even ask for anything? Both women said thank you. And even though they immediately walked away, that is still a getter response than some I've seen (like "get away from me").
Personally, I'm not a fan of PUA. I think it's overly gamey. But it does have value to some men.
coolsocks00 1 1y ago
How terrible you are to begin with depends on your starting point. This guy is obviously new to CA and probably is, like most guys starting out, a bit socially awkward. He's being put on the spot by that coach who may or may not be giving him shit advice.
By the looks of it this coach is trying to desensitize the student and is very unlikely to be expecting any kind of actual results with women at this point. It's in bad taste to film this IMO, as the student is willingly making a fool of himself.
Pfizer 1y ago
Unless. You put on it classified stamp and review in 50+ years.
XMRLover 1y ago
First off, he looks like an average dude. For the average dude, a cold approach in THAT situation might net you 1 girl for every 1,000+ approaches. The video showed 3.
Only the very top percentage of men can survive in that type of CA situation.
But it does break down the barrier of social anxiety in a very harsh way so when you're in a less harsh situation, CA will be much easier and more appropriate. I call that a lukewarm approach. These women are in situations where they know they can be approached, it's part of the environment.
I feel like there are more productive ways to achieve the same result though. If you really want to break down some social barriers, go get a door knocking sales job. Knock doors for 8-10 hours a day, 5-6 days a week. Trust me...there is nothing a woman could say at a bar that can hurt you after a few months of that.
Also, self-awareness is key. Let's be brutally honest with ourselves about our looks and value. If you can do that, you know exactly how and when to approach women.
mattyanon Admin 1y ago
Yes.
Yes
Yes
Ok..... first off.... daygame is awesome, but you can't expect to fuck every woman you meet. Most women are not giving out IOI's because they are busy shopping and not expecting men to talk to them ....... why smile at guys you like if none will approach you? You don't smile at random hot women, most women most of the time don't smile at random hot men.
So you have to approach them, stop them, and escalate things in a way that works with her.
When you say "you're cute", you are laying your cards on the table and forcing her to make a decision. If you say "you're cute", you are stating your intentions. At that point she makes her decision based on if she likes you or not AT THAT POINT IN TIME. If she's attracted, it's great. If not, then she walks (as one of them did, instantly, when he said this). Most men need some time for a woman to be attracted to him, so stating this early is generally a bad move if you're not super hot yourself.
It's a good thing to do because it helps to make the guy more relaxed expressing himself, but it's not going to impress a girl if you aren't hot.
The hard thing to do, that none of these snippets show, is engaging the girl in a fun conversation that could potentially lead to more. Most stranger interactions are functional and predefined...... eg "what's the time" and "can you give me a dollar for being homeless".
Stopping her, chatting to her, having fun, and escalating towards more is difficult and requires skill and confidence and you have to first get past your own awkwardness and shyness.
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whytehorse2021 1y ago
Start with London day game by Tom Torrero. It builds you up as you go. You should start by giving random women compliments to get rid of your approach anxiety. I don't even need to watch the video to know the dude has approach anxiety and that's why he gets rejected.