i know this is the trend these days, and so it has also happened to me - i've been falsely accused of rape. i've been seeing this girl for a month: went on 4 dates, had sex one time. yesterday we met again, got down to it. this girl was all over me: almost bit my lip off, scratched my whole body to sores, tried choking me all the time, left me bruises. me being the absolute fucking retard that i am, i stuck it in without a rubber. she was enjoying it at first, but then she moaned "no". i slowed down, looked at her - she was clearly ok with it, "fuck me" eyes and all, but i was put off. she then moans "do you know you're raping me?", with that same look in her eyes. this is when i stop, stare, and pull out. she gets dressed. i sit there for a while, realizing that she's not the one being fucked here.
i get home, have my buddy record me and call her on the phone. she claims that she said no first and i stuck it in second, wants me to acknowdedge this. she even said that she doesn't care about the condom not being on, and is just angry that i won't accept that i raped her. i got her to admit twice, on tape, that she was willing to have intercourse. i don't know if it's enough. today she blocked me and deleted our chat - i can't access our conversation, other than a few screenshots where it's clear that she's willing to meet me, texts me first and so on.
my buddy suggests i go back to her and speak on it, try and get more out of the talk. i go, put the recorder on. more of the same here: she says she said no first, i say that was not the case. this time i also get her to admit that she changes her mind post-coitus: she says she agreed to have sex with guys without a condom, but later realized she was young and stupid and so her consent doesn't count. i tell her i want her to understand that i'm not the person that wants anything to do with people that don't want him, and this talk of rape is absolutely insane to me - she says ok. we get back to me sticking it in before the "no" and her being ok with it at first. we go back and forth on it, when she suddenly starts screaming "what do you want from me", which i think was an attempt to attract the neighbors. i get up and leave. she gets up in my face, follows me, staring me down with the crazy eyes. i dodge her, tell her not to touch me. she screeches "fine, i wasn't going to".
i'm 25, this is my first time dealing with such accusations, and with crazy in general. i don't know if she has a rape fantasy and i was too beta in the moment, so she hamstered her way to an actual rape, but what's my course of action here (other than being checked for stds)? we share a common social circle. buddy got my sores and bruises on video too, announced the time and date of them. i was gentle, no bruises on her - unless she's done something to herself afterwards.
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12monkeys 1y ago
so you didn't record video meeting with her
That's where having CCTV at home running 24/7 comes useful. Not only for sex but also for burglaries. Even now it is not too late, she might visit. Not doing everything is taking chances.
Although CCTV can record video, sound is sometimes shitty, so record audio on mobile. Make sure audio recorder is working in background continuously and doesn't stop on screen turn off or app doesn't get killed after few minutes. I use RecForge.
Stop nagging her it puts in her mind more of the same.
If it ever comes to that invite her in for a meal - record everything. But make sure you're calm as MF whatever happens. And never return to the topic, just look at her like she is a child and continue eating. Keep distance she might try to get sexual - have it on vid, don't let it happen but play along withot sticking a dick. AT some point look at phone and say you need to go in an h, she might try to escalate is she didn't. This paragraph is not the best if you don't know what you're doing [being player helps] as you might fuck it up more.
IF you're seriously endangered probably worth to pay for 1h lawyer. Laws are different everywhere.
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mattyanon Admin 1y ago
This comment is not helpful and is destructive to our community, I am deleting it.
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mattyanon Admin 1y ago
Good plan....... don't know if it's enough either, but it can't do your case any harm.
willing to meet you counts for nothing.
Generally this is a bad idea.
good
This is good for you: her consent absolutely counts unless she is under-age.
ok.....
This isn't a rape fantasy. This is a fucked up girl who has been abused and has not come to terms with it. She is living and reliving her abuse and pulling you into a fucked up victim scenario.
Not really........ this was all designed to go this way from the start. She loves the attention, the drama, the upper hand from being able to make accusiations.
The bruises won't exonerate you.
Here's what you do in the short term:
You cut ALL contact with her. You treat her as if she's a stalker, and you don't give her the oxygen of hope or attention. Do not meet her (she'll try and set you up), don't talk to her (nothing you say will help), avoid her at all consequences. If she shows up when your social group is there, you leave. ZERO CONTACT means ZERO CONTACT.
Tell your friends what happened. Tell EVERYONE what happened. She'll be lying about you, you can't counter this with stoic silence or they'll believe her. Most will believe her anyway sadly.
She's very, very unlikely to take this to the police.
If she does (unlikely), remember this: say NOTHING to the police. Don't explain, don't even admit you had sex. They want a conviction and everything you say works against you. There is nothing you can say that will help your case, and everything you say will chip away at your potential case. Say nothing other than "I need a lawyer".
Put all your evidence somewhere safe with a friend. You don't wanna lose that if your house gets burned down / someone steals your phone / computer crashes / etc.
You could talk to a lawyer now, but I don't think it's likely that you'll have problems.
Good luck and don't stick your dick in crazy again :)
HopelessRomantic 1y ago
This. And make copies of all your audio and video recordings. Stash them at a parents, friends, safety deposit box, places the police won't know and can't get a search warrant for. Remember, the evidence will help you, why keep it in one place so the police can have their hands on it and you can't show your Lawyer.
whytehorse2021 1y ago
It all boils down to her getting a rape kit done and filing charges. Otherwise it's her word against yours. I suggest you collect all your evidence and store it safely and never talk to her again. Be ready for a #metoo accusation later on.