Been with my LTR for 7 months. Things have been good, however, I am convinced either my red pill knowledge is making me paranoid or she is slowly checking out of the relationship I’ll start with the positive:
The sex is recurring. She still blows me, and even lets me fuck her in the ass which is something she gets no pleasure out of doing other than to please me. She says things constantly like “I just want to make you feel good”.
She says she loves me, and anytime I make plans that involve her she always accepts. She frequently alludes to wanting marriage, and tells me she cannot imagine herself with any other guy.
Now the negatives, which have been concerning:
She clearly doesn’t enjoy sex with me as much as she did when she first met me. I attribute some of this to the honeymoon phase coming to an end, but she seems to only fuck me to keep me around, and this may be because of a perceived SMV gap on her part (I consider myself to be a solid 8, she’s a 6) . Keep in mind, we’re both 22 and I am not supporting her financially (I actually make her pay quite frequently) so I’m 100% sure she does not view me as a provider.
Additionally, it seems as though she doesn’t value my attention as much anymore. When we first started dating, she always wanted to spend time on the phone, and would text me several times throughout the day (good morning texts, random Twitter posts about sex, etc). The frequency of communication has dropped quite a bit. This makes me think she may be getting attention elsewhere, because she is in college where Chads are abundant. I do not suspect cheating at this time - she isn’t protective of her phone (she even gave me her password lol) and volunteered for us to share each other’s location (obviously I didn’t want to do that, huge invasion of privacy on both ends).
Lastly, she says these subtle things every now and then that lead me to believe she just isn’t as head over heels for me as she was in the beginning. One thing in particular she said a few weeks ago was “I want to feel how I felt when I first met you”, and her pussy feels dry at times when I fuck her. To her defense, sometimes I skip foreplay because I’m so horny and go straight to fucking her. She says she wants more foreplay which seems reasonable, but when we first started dating, she’d get wet before I even touch her.
Again, I’m completely unsure as to if this is all a figment of my own paranoia (“the curse of the red pill, as some call it”), but if these are negative signs, I want to nip it in the bud before it destroys the relationship because she is a good girl who is eager to please. My frame has been solid - the only thing I have fucked up on is seeing her so often (often times 4-5 days at a time).
Is she on the verge of branch swinging, or should I run some dread to try to salvage what is left?
unplugged69 2y ago
Sounds like you are not providing the obligatory dread that is required in any LTR, try to work on dread game because you need it for all future relationships so you may as well practice now with her.
However the better question is, if you are an 8/10 and 22 years old why the fuck are you in an LTR with a 6 who is only offering uninspired "duty sex".
Reading your post, it seems she sees you as beta, even if you do not pay for her you can still give beta vibes by giving too much comfort, too much attention, too little abundance, IDGAF and dread. I'm honestly not sure you are ready for an LTR, in fact I don't think anyone is at the age of 22.
I would say the chances of her cheating on you are high and who cares about her phone password, she can go in ANY club even as a 5/10 and say yes to one of the 10 chads hitting on her that night and get raw dogged in the bathroom, come home have a shower and you'll NEVER know. Best to assume they're all cheating whores and act accordingly. Anyway, the biggest tell in an LTR isn't her protecting her phone, it's her giving you less attention than before, having less sex, and the biggest one of them all is her verbalizing that you are not wetting her cunny anymore.
Who gives a fuck about oral sex? I almost never do it on first dates and they're all wet regardless. Women need to be horny in their mind, and her pussy is dry because she sees you as BILLY BETA and she wants one of the chads she's seeing at Uni. If she hasn't gotten fucked by one yet, you can bet your ass she's got her eye on one already.
Here's how you handle this shit my man:
Read stoicism because you're going to need it when this relationship inevitably ends
Implement dread, try the married TRP 12 levels of dread because that shit works well in LTRs, obviously you don't need the parts that talk about marriage/divorce. Also on this note never get married because you are FUCKED in that situation
Start gaming other women, you don't have to cheat off the bat, just start slowly. Basically start engaging women in conversation everywhere you can and learn how to flirt effortlessly. Once you've mastered this you can do it in front of her and I guarantee you she will fuck with passion that night
Some guys think it's hard to start spinning plates while in an LTR but nothing could be further from the truth. You see when you're cold approaching now you already have abundance. If you strike out with a girl, you can to your LTR and get that low effort duty sex she offers. But if you manage to pull off a few ONS then you'll realise what you're missing and have no regrets about plating her, it's really a win-win and you can snowball to success this way.
constructionmane 2y ago
Why would she continue to suck my dick and let me fuck her in the ass if she views me as beta? Not going against any of the points in your post, just genuinely curious because I didn’t think woman degrade themselves for betas.
unplugged69 2y ago
Women will give sex to beta bux to keep them around, that's why the common trope is that sex stops after marriage for most guys, because they were beta to begin with. I'm also a good example, I got sex as a beta, including anal. You aren't necessarily an incel as beta, it's just that you tend to do stupid shit and humiliate yourself for a bit of pussy and it's often sloppy seconds after chad is tired of it.
Ziogio 2y ago
This is great advice. I just dropped soft next on my LTR. I plated her for a year and she hit me of for monogamy or else. I caved. Now she’s showing the early warning sings of losing attraction: not coming over as much, asking me to see her there, take out trash, all that shit. Fuck that my brother. She would have never dreamed of that when I was plating her and kicking her out after sex. It is Not severe, but I know it’s happening. Not sure if I’m gonna walk away or soft next but we’ll see. Either way, she’s getting the downgrade. Im 49 and shes 28 and hot. I started getting oneitis after agreeing to monogamy. I’m an idiot. Oh well. Even after all these years and having good frame and OI, I still get tripped up from time to time. Thankfully I have the balls to walk away. She’s already called me 5 times and texted me three times. Not gonna break. Good luck.
unplugged69 2y ago
Nice dude, it's pretty insane how whenever we give them what they want they start treating us like trash, like losers. I guess from a psychological perspective they probably see themselves like losers and agreeing to their stupid demands diminishes us in their eyes.
Whatever the case, if you agree to monogamy with a bitch, then your dread game needs to be pretty fucking insane otherwise she loses attraction fast, that's my experience. On top of the dread game, it's the last betafying move you need to agree to or the relationship is literally over, if she asks for any other beta shit the answer is you literally laugh in her face and continue what you are doing, you have to treat everything like a shit test now because agreeing to monogamy has provided so much goddamn comfort the whole thing is out of balance and what was supposed to be 90% Alpha 10% beta has now become more like 40% alpha and 60% beta.
I'm going to guess your other problem is that she's getting close to her 30s so she needs to lock you down or else, but the problem is these stupid bitches don't know how to act. If she was super nice now, acting even better than before, then you'd have no problem with monogamy. They have no idea they literally ruin almost every single relationship that had any long term prospect by acting like cunts as soon as they get what they want.
Personally I would play the risk game with her, I would start doing whatever I wanted, including cheat on her, and when she finds out I would act SUPER normal, super chill, like I've seen it all before and I know exactly how it's going to end (with make up sex). I would NOT apologise, or give her any details, or an explanation or any of that shit, just agree that yes I did fuck cindy or whatever her name was and then stay quiet but don't back down. It's funny, I've been in this situation many times and 8 times out of 10 she will actually rationalize it somehow, have some crazy sex with you, and then start acting better for a while because you just provided a fuckton of active dread, unfortunately you have to keep doing it when her behaviour slips up but that's how bitches are, and this is why we can't have nice things!
Ziogio 2y ago
^^^ Agree on all points. Great post.
Musicgoon425 2y ago
Are you lifting and improving yourself? If you are spending time apart, you should be working on your mission and social skills. Every time she sees you again you should be a better version of you than you were.
Do other women want you? You should be out talking to other women. Maybe have some plates. This isn't optional. If you like this relationship, you have to show you are wanted and some other woman could jump on your dick at any moment. She will have more options than you can imagine in college, you need to show that you have options too.
Your new best friend is indifference. If she cheats, you replace her. If the sex dies you replace her. If she tries to make you jealous. Don't give a fuck.
Work on yourself my guy.
[deleted] 2y ago
[--removed--]
Jimpanzee 2y ago
Canned response with no thought behind it. Ignore this OP.
[deleted] 2y ago
[--removed--]
Jimpanzee 2y ago
The advice is good if OP didn’t care and wanted to nuke the relationship or if she wasn’t putting out but I don’t think that’s what he wants. That’s some level 12 dread shit and they’ve only been dating 7 months.
I think there should be room for traditional relationships to take root in TRP otherwise we’re just promoting degeneracy out of spite and are no better than your average thot.
chickengod 2y ago
Wouldn't that be a little bit quick for an LTR? I get it for a FWB or plate or whatever. Maybe dread first
MonkMode 2y ago
LTR after 2 years. Not 7 Mos.
[deleted] 2y ago
[--removed--]
constructionmane 2y ago
Not really - it just makes it easier to locate me when I’m pulling up to her college. A few times I broke frame and threatened to break up with her though. Just worried this is the beginning of the end.
nowiambecomechad1 2y ago
Never threaten anything, it makes you look weak
jormigaso 2y ago
AWALT, all of them are bitches, just keep abundance mindset and look for other bitches out there, who fucking cares if she will branch swing or not, they are opportunistic as fuck, if you are no longer the best she can do, she will replace you like a piece of trash
Ziogio 2y ago
Absooooolutellyyy
jriver11 2y ago
Damn, lots of negativity in these answers. I'm a firm believer that ANY issue in a relationship can be related back to the quality of the sex which, as you mentioned, seems to be waning for her.
What I recommend is doing non-sexual activities together and making them sexual. Grab her by the throat in the grocery store, spank her at the bank, etc. Stay playful yet firm but don't fuck right away. Make her wait, even overnight if you have to, but keep up the sexual tension. She'll rape you eventually and those other issues will start to fade.
Additionally, yeah some dread game is always good but don't be mean about it. Keep the sexual tension up and she'll get jealous just seeing you talk to other girls, much less flirting with them.
[deleted]
Jimpanzee 2y ago
God damn some of these comments have no chill. She seems like a nice girl who likes you and wants to make it work. No need to go “fuck other girls” unless you are over her.
It’s simple bro. The honeymoon phase is over. What’s concerning isn’t that it’s over it’s that she said “I want to feel like I felt when I first met you.” That to me says that she doesn’t understand that the honeymoon phase is a thing. Some girls branch swing because they don’t understand this.
You need to talk to her and figure out where you want this to go. Are you guys in it for the long haul? Is this just a fling? You need to decide if you mean enough to eachother to weather the storm of an actual relationship.
You guys are young, so you might not want to. However traditionally speaking you are at the age where most humans throughout history settled down and started popping out kids. For better or worse (probably worse) that’s all fucked up now and women and men both spend their 20’s fucking around and then their 30’s trying to scramble to find someone.
I chose the former scenario and stayed with the girl. I was about your age when we met about 8 years ago. We just had a baby girl. Life is good.
But my god do I have a burning desire to stick my dick in some strange. It’s fucking tough man.
But again, if I’d had let her go so I could fuck other girls I’d be letting one of the good ones slip by. You kind of have to pick your poison.
So yeah long story short figure out where you want to go with this relationship first, then from there plan your next move…either fucking other girls or building a strong relationship. In my opinion the latter is the more noble yet difficult path, but I wouldn’t blame you for taking the former.
And yes be careful not to go all dark TRP on your girl. When you are in a relationship you need to play both roles, the “beta” provider and the exciting “alpha”. It’s a balance. Lean to far one way and she’ll find someone else to make up the difference, be that a beta orbiter or another dick.
whytehorse2021 2y ago
You lost your alpha. That's what she's saying. The guy you were when she first met you made her wet. Be that guy.
Semenbaptism 2y ago
Honeymoon is over for her and not you. This is bad news because it's going to make you clingy and make terrible moves if you let it.
Treat the relationship like the honeymoon is over for you too. Break any routines you guys have(dont go to a favorite restaurant, stop texting her as much, no goodnight or good morning texts) switch shit up. This is gonna get the spark back in the relationship. It's a lot of work, so be sure she's worth it.
Just ended my LTR of 4 years because honestly it became too much work to get the spark back. It would have required a whole new me and I'm not in the business for changing for women.
MonkMode 2y ago
https://www.reddit.com/r/dankvideos/comments/px4qug/how_can_i_trigger_feminists_post_this_video/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share