Over at the main sub, we saw this post in which a man questions his 33 year old fiancee about her previous boyfriends. He notices all her priors are "tall jocks". He says he's never seen any of her prior boyfriends. He starts asking questions. She then says
I told him it's none of his business.
I see. So he wants to know about his woman's sexual past. He wants to know who she's been with and the kinds of men she's been with. She says that's "none of his business".
Well, ladies, two can play that game. If things about your past are none of his business, then his past is none of your business.
Where I work? None of your business.
What's my salary? None of your business.
Have I ever been married before? None of your business.
My past criminal history is None of your business. And I'm not like that anymore, so that doesn't matter.
I have 3 kids by 2 baby mamas, but that's None of your business. And I'm not like that anymore, so that doesn't matter.
I used to be a ch!ld m0l3st3r, but it's None of your business. And I'm not like that anymore, so that doesn't matter.
I'm gonna be with my sugar baby working today. But that's none of your business.
I've had 10 jobs in the last 3 years, but that's None of your business.
I got kicked out of 4 apartments in the last 2 years for nonpayment of rent and once for trashing the place, and running up debt from criminal damage to property. But I'm not like that anymore, so it's none of your business.
I have about $300,000 in debt and declared bankruptcy twice. None of your business. And I'm not like that anymore, so that doesn't matter.
I make my living selling drugs and doing contract murders. My last two girlfriends were killed as collateral damage. but that's none of your business.
I used to fuck hookers without protection. But I'm not like that anymore, so it's none of your business.
I used to be an unattractive Blue Pill simp, but I learned all about how to attract women by using The Red Pill. But I'm not like that anymore, so it's none of your business.
EDIT: Hi, lurkers from inceltear. I cannot believe what dumbfuckers you are who cannot understand satire and parody.
IT IS FUCKING PARODY. IT'S SATIRE. Goddamn some of you people really are stupid.
[deleted] 2y ago
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[deleted] 2y ago
Response to your edit:
You don't get to come to any subreddit you want and say anything you want. You didn't come here looking for empathy; you came here lecturing me about how "discouraged" you are because the whole world isn't coddling you and everyone else about every bad thing that happened to them. The world does not owe you understanding, empathy, or anything else. I don't owe you anything.
This thread isn't about "sexual trauma", this thread is about women who refuse to disclose their pasts to the men from whom they demand commitment, because reasons, usually "none of your business". The point of the thread is to illustrate the absurdity of that position. A man who commits to you has the absolute right to know whatever the fuck he wants to know about you, and you have an obligation to disclose it. You certainly will demand to know all sorts of things about your man, and you'll consider he's obligated to make full disclosure to you.
You can keep information about your sexual past to yourself if you want; and he can then refuse to give you the relationship, commitment, or whatever else it is you want from him. But that's the deal - if you get to know whatever you want about him; then he gets to know whatever he wants to know about you.
And I used quotes as I did because much of what you women call "trauma" is the usual heartbreaks and bad, poorly considered decisions women make when left to their own devices. Most of the "sexual trauma" that occurs to women involves late nights, the consumption of various substances, altered mental states, personality disorders, general irresponsibility, and underdeveloped judgment ability.
I blocked you because you don't have anything useful to add here. If all you're going to do is shame men, do it somewhere else, because you don't get to do that here.
You have a really nice day, somewhere else. And YOU do better.
[deleted] 2y ago
Response to your Edit 2:
wHo hUrT yOu? I hope that you eventually heal from your "trauma".
We don't allow shaming here. We don't allow it in the form of faux "concern" either.
[deleted] 2y ago
Get out of here. This from a woman who makes jokes on a thread about someone projectile shitting all over their bathroom.
This from a woman living her life on "survival mode" through no fault of mine or other men.
This from a woman who can't get along with her parents, accuses her parents of "abuse", and hates men.
Your "trauma" is not my fault, or other men's fault. I didn't cause you any "trauma". Your "issues" are not my fault, or men's fault, or your parents' fault.
YOU do better.
moorekom Mod 2y ago
u/aldabruzzo, Can you please link to the original comment in the body of the post for posterity? Thank you.
happybowtiethefirst 2y ago
A woman’s sexual history does not equal a mans job history
More than likely both parties will talk about their job history but sexual history really isnt all that important. Theres nothing wrong with anyone having a lot of sexual partners. It doesnt change anything about the person physically or otherwise.
Why do you think women who have had sex are “tarnished” ? Nothing changes physically or biologically when a woman has sex, even the hymen doesnt always break with sex and can break before sex.
Also sex can mean different things at different times, it can be different between different times. Sex can have an emotional component as well, meaning the 10 dudes someone had sex with were empty expressions of physical pleasure while sex with someone you really love is an expression of love and the bond between two people.
If you really believe that sex is the main thing that women bring to marriage with a man I cant help you but everyone is different and men and women are complex human beings that all bring their own things into a relationship… if your girlfriend is mostly just a hole to you you should evaluate that relationship because most likely she sees you as more than just a dick and isnt trying to take your money or whatever you guys think
And yeah there are some bad women out there who are only there for your money or whatever you have to offer but thats not all women… so please re-evaluate this point of view… and you may find your love life gets a whole lot better
Smartcom5 2y ago
There might be nothing wrong with someone having a lot of sexual partners for you, yes. For the majority of men it matters fundamentally and for a reason naturally and instinctively – as the notch-count reveals a lot about the person's character, upbringing and ethical stance and especially her moral standards.
That's an outright lie and you probably already know it and put up that post as a cope-mechanism for whatever reason. Science and psychology has proven time and time again that a high number of partners destroys a woman's ability to pair-bond, apart from the inimical physical effects it has on her body.
If you honestly believe the crabs you're saying yourself here, you're in for a bad future. There's a ton of changes for a woman physically and especially biologically and psychically. You may not like that, but that's the actual truth.
Mankind already did re-evaluated that view-point, like aeons ago. It turned out that it may imply that the woman in question is of low value and highly promiscuous for a multitude of men, not just her own man.
Yes, until the marriage is due – then it stops all of a sudden since the deal is sealed.
Honestly, who are you trying to be kidding here?
ogrilla99 Mod 2y ago
There are a bunch of ways in which what you're saying is, IMHO, wrong. Here's where I disagree:
Correct. But there's no reason why men and women should evaluate their respective partners in the same way. This is not a job application we're talking about. Everyone has a right to evaluate their potential life partner with whatever criteria they wish to use.
That said, while every person has a right to use whatever criteria they wish, I agree that that doesn't mean we can't disagree with them. So allow me to explain why I think it's totally justified to place importance on your partner's sexual past.
For many women, a man's job history is important, not just as a marker of current and future wealth, but what it says about the man. A man who chooses engineering is likely to be very logical, able to work hard for many years to achieve his goals, but on the bad side, perhaps a little emotionally stunted. On the flip side, a man who chooses to be an artist is likely to be very attuned to his emotions, spontaneous, etc. but on the downside, can be flightly and irrational. The bottomline is that what pursuit you choose to dedicate 8-10 hours of your life every day for 40 years says a lot about who you are, what you value, what your strengths and weaknesses are, etc. etc.
It's the same thing with a woman's (and a man's, for that matter) sexual history. Who you decide to be physically intimate with says a lot about how you choose your partners, what you value in them, what you value in human relationships, etc. etc. And that *should* be a very important part of your evaluation of a potential partner.
​
Sure it can. But you're trying to figure out what sex with this person will mean, to you both, *in the future* (assuming we're talking about possible long term commitment). If a person (man or woman) has had nothing but superficial, emotionally hollow, short term flings with bad men for 20 years, what are the chances that this time around, with you, things will truly be different? Sure, she can say that the past is the past and now she's changed, but that's not always true. The past *is* a reasonable predictor of future behavior. Every other part of our society is structured around that maxim. That's why credit scores (a compilation of past financial decisions) are used to evaluate your ability to take on future responsibilities (a new loan). And previous job experience is evaluated when applying for a new job. Relationships are no different. So when you say sex can mean different things at different times, I agree, but if 90% of the time, in your past, it has meant meaningless short term fun, then I'm not going to be confident that somehow, this time, it will be different. Heck, even women believe this, *about men*, which is why they warn women not to trust fuckboys, or take pause when talking to a 40 year old man who's never been in a LTR. Why does the past only matter when it comes to guys' behaviors?
Now, a woman is free to not detail her sexual past (although not lie about it). That's her right. But then a man is free to take that silence in whatever way he wishes (an admission of guilt, a differing view on privacy, a lack of trust, whatever).
The rest of of your post is, frankly, a straw man. No one is saying sex is the only thing that matters in a relationship. But it is important (perhaps not to everyone, but to many), and regardless, that's the facet of relationships that the OP is choosing to focus on in this post. Doesn't mean he or anyone else is denying that other parts aren't important. After all, when you decide on a job, if you ask what the pay is, does that automatically mean you view a job as nothing but a paycheck?
[deleted] 2y ago
If it’s important to him, then it’s important and he has a right to know it.
If they’re serious and she is demanding his commitment, he has a right to know whatever he wants to know about her.
A man can have whatever standards he wants for whatever reason he wants.
Personally I agree that if they aren’t serious and it’s just dating or sex, then yeah, her past isn’t important. But if he’s being asked to commit, now it is important.
happybowtiethefirst 2y ago
Sure two parties should both talk about stuff like this but they should also trust each other. Also why is it that important? Like i would want to know about right now… about a guys life but I dont care about how many people hes had sex with because its just not important… it doesnt change anything in the relationship as long as we trust each other
[deleted] 2y ago
If you have to ask why it’s important, then you don’t understand anything about men
happybowtiethefirst 2y ago
Ok please explain to me why its important
[deleted] 2y ago
Sure baby. I make my money legit. Don’t ask me any questions about it. Just trust me.
Sure baby, I have no STDs. But you don’t have to ask me anything about it or double check. Just trust me.
Of course I love you. Don’t ask me any questions about it baby. Just trust me.
Of course I’m not going to get you pregnant. Don’t ask me any questions about it. Just trust me.
Of course we don’t have to use any protection baby. Don’t ask me any questions about it. Just trust me.
Don’t ask me anything. Don’t double check anything about me. You don’t need to. You just trust me.
Got it?
happybowtiethefirst 2y ago
So if someone will not tell you anything about their life you should probably break up with them cause thats like 5 major major major red flags right there.
Don’t continue this relationship with someone you dont know at all and then get mad at all women when she ends up using you because lets be honest you ignored some HUGE red flags
[deleted] 2y ago
Yay. You get it. Kind of. Way to go.
I thought you said we should trust each other. Red flags? Pshaw. I’m supposed to “trust” you.
It’s just that you will never accept or understand that somethings are important to men. You will never get it and that’s OK
[deleted] 2y ago
Maybe it’s not important to you. But it is important to him. Can you at least accept that it’s important to him?
happybowtiethefirst 2y ago
In a real relationship i would talk to him about this but give me actual reasons why… youre just telling me i don’t understand- help me understand your point of view
[deleted] 2y ago
I thought we are supposed to just trust each other. That’s what you said- just trust.
Yeah, no. Make full disclosure of what I want to know and then we will talk about “trust”. Maybe.
happybowtiethefirst 2y ago
Omg we arent in a relationship we are two strangers having an argument… if this was a relationship i would consider that or i would have already told him or we would have talked about it. And i said trust is important but its not the only thing successful relationships have…
So. For the sake of argument. Please tell me why you, and the rest of these subs think it is so important. Because i want to understand your point of view
[deleted] 2y ago
You just don’t get it
[deleted] 2y ago
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[deleted] 2y ago
Yet another dumbfuck who stumbled in here
[deleted] 2y ago
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[deleted] 2y ago
You really are a dumbfuck
MT_Merchant_Mangler 2y ago
Dude, half those things might give bitches the tingles.
houseoftolstoy Mod 2y ago
I was thinking of doing a response like this, but you beat me to the punch. I would have taken a different approach, but me doing one would be redundant.
The post sparked my idea was even worse than just a woman in a relationship, this was with the man she was soon going to marry. In marriage, there is absolutely no way that it is "none of his business." It absolutely is his business and his right to ask. If she does not want to respond, then he is within his own right to end things there. Which is exactly what the man in the post I am referring to did.
[deleted] 2y ago
With a woman preparing for marriage, her husband's business is whatever the fuck he decides it is. He has the absolute right to know whatever the fuck he wants to know about her. In marriage or a serious relationship, "his business" is anything and everything about her, at any time, for whatever reason he wants. If he wants to know it, she has an obligation to be honest about it and disclose it, whatever "it" is.
Now, she can choose not to disclose it. And in that event, she chooses to not be his fiancee or wife. Period. End of discussion.
Typo-MAGAshiv Mod 2y ago
I was born a multimillionaire, but I frittered it all away buying gifts for sugar babies and hookers. Now I live in a cardboard box under an interstate overpass.
I'm just not a "money guy" anymore, and you'll have to accept that. Besides, it's the past, and the past is none of your business.
Lord_Kano 2y ago
If a man said "I used to try to buy women's affection by spending money lavishly on them and buying expensive gifts. I came to learn that I no longer want to be in a relationship where I'm only valued for what I can provide and I don't do that anymore." a woman would lose her shit.
It's absurd that men are supposed to accept women as they are when they would NEVER do the same for us.
[deleted] 2y ago
I used to love going out dancing. That was so much fun. I loved that.
I used to go out dancing with girls all the time. I loved doing that.
Well, I still love going out dancing, but I don't want to do that with you. See, I kind of like you, but I don't love you and I'm never going to love you. You're my safe choice sure thing booty call. I don't like, you know, actually want to be seen in public with you. No, you're the girl I call when I'm hard up and pent up and need to bust a nut. And that's ALL you are, and that's ALL you'll ever be.
Girlfriend? Dancing? Spend time or money on you? No fucking way. Not with you. And you sure as fuck are not commitment or marriage material. You'll need to be happy with being the backbencher 4th stringer, who gets called up when everyone else is busy doing something or someone else.
You understand, right baby?
[deleted] 2y ago
I used to take my past first dates out to Ruths Chris and then out dancing. I used to spend money on them.
I took my past girlfriends on lavish trips to Europe and the Far East. Fun times. We had so much fun.
But all those girls were just for fun. They weren't girls I ever wanted to get serious about. They were losers and no one I'd ever start a family with.
I'm not like that anymore. I've changed. My preferences have changed. Now I want someone down to earth and sensible. I want someone who's gonna be here for me and for us.
So no more Ruths Chris and expensive dinners. First dates are drinks at this local watering hole I like. Because, well, I'm just not like that anymore. My preferences have changed. My tastes have changed. I'm DEEPER than that now. I'm not the shallow spendthrift I used to be.
And dinners, dates, vacations? No more. Now, it's Applebees and Olive Garden. If we splurge maybe Red Lobster for surf n turf. Vacations are to a national park. Wasting money on expensive dinners and vacations - well, I'm just not like that anymore. My preferences have changed. My tastes have changed. I'm not that shallow guy anymore. I need to know you want ME for ME, baby. I need to know you're here for ME.
you understand, right, baby?
That__EST 2y ago
This post is old AF, and yes I only found it because I looked into your post history to see what other tough love but common sense stuff you've said...
With all that said, I actually am a woman who would be attracted and perfectly fine with this mentality. My own relationship with my husband actually follows this narrative and my splurging follows this pattern.
My husband was in a relationship where he spent an eye watering amount of money on credit cards with a woman who he was very much eager to please and impress. After their eventual break up, him working many overtime shifts to pay off his debt over many many months, and learning firsthand that money doesn't grow on trees, he and I connected and our dating/married life definitely doesn't mirror that of his previous relationship. And I'm glad he learned his lesson with someone else other than me. Financial stability is my number one thing in a partner. Spending money frivolously on myself makes alarm bells go off in my mind that I'm taking food out of the mouth of my future self. A man taking me to "his" watering hole and introducing me as the woman in his life to the people he considers vital to his life means more to me than a trip to the finest of restaurants. That's something you do for a very nice occasion, not something you do just because it's date night on Saturday.
There are people who could claim that I'm getting the short end of the stick would be wrong. I'm getting what I want in a partner which is one who is now very financially responsible and realizes that credit cards aren't "free money". Unfortunately in the past I've dated people who have extra money to spare and don't mind taking me to an expensive restaurant because they think they can make a fast good impression that leads to the bedroom and/or they have no interest in bringing me around the people who they truly care about (like those at their favorite watering hole) and want to be able to leave the relationship at any time without their friends haven gotten to know me at all.
[deleted] 2y ago
Hopefully you realize you did not get a partner.
You got a husband. Which is what you need.
That__EST 2y ago
I'll take that as a compliment. Idk we have a unique marriage but it's ok. It could definitely be worse.
[deleted] 2y ago
That legit made me laugh out loud. Brilliant!
[deleted] 2y ago
I'm so glad you're so understanding.
Now get your shoes on and let's go get some din-din. There's sure to be a long long line at the Taco Bell drive thru and I don't want to wait long. The Ice in my Baja Blast Mountain Dew will melt....
HephaestusRuin 2y ago
As you are clearly a man of High Culture, allow me to share with you a small tip, one so simple I have no doubt you've long since picked up on it: Half Baja Blast Zero, Half Regular Dew Zero, shake it up just a bit, serve with a slice of lime. Pour some of that on your head, your tongue"ll beat your brains out trying to get to it.
mistralol 2y ago
What? No Golden Arches or Kan't find the chicken? Shame on you lol
[deleted] 2y ago
Oh, I'm definitely like that. I'm all about taking you for some fast food, baby. As long as we go Dutch.
Typo-MAGAshiv Mod 2y ago
Dutch oven.
SnakeEyeskid 2y ago
Wait you kings even pretend to pay for the common populace? I just point at the check and say.
"well its less then my time is worth, but I'm willing to give you a discount depending on how you perform tonight, the rest amount will billed to you r home adress, so do you live close or will you need to pay the cab aswell?" /s I mean obviously I already checked the adress so I can send the bill...
But in a sense it's true. It's not like they could afford my time.
8lackJack8lack 2y ago
Is KFC coming up short where you live as well?
mistralol 2y ago
Yeah... They even apologised... https://www.thesun.co.uk/news/5649831/kfc-advert-chicken-shortage-apology-twitter/
Temporary rebranding to FCK
[deleted] 2y ago
Hilarious
[deleted] 2y ago
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[deleted] 2y ago
Whoosh
Fliegendemaus1 2y ago
Brilliant.
sleepyweaselisawake Mod 2y ago
I agree with women on this one.. Their past sexual partners and behavior doesn't matter to me. Why? Because I'm just another guy fucking them for awhile then moving on.
A woman's past doesn't matter when there's no possibility of a future with her.
againstthe-grain 2y ago
I’m almost just like you except I hope they’ve had a very slutty past because that means my night is going to be just that much better. I remember when I use to believe in love and I was all concerned about a woman’s past. A lot changes in 10 years
[deleted] 2y ago
Yes. This becomes an issue only when commitment comes into the picture. If you're a fuckboy, you don't get to know her past.
Another consideration is whether you want to know it. If you want to know it, then you want to know, and you can have whatever reasons you want for wanting to know it.
It is sufficient that you want to know it. Women want to know all sorts of things about the men they fuck, date, and marry, and no one bats an eye about that- in fact society deems women entitled to know pretty much whatever they want to know about these men. So I see no problem with men wanting to know what they want to konw about women they commit to.
lurkerhasarisen Mod 2y ago
Yep. I have no problem with anyone asking whatever they want, and anyone declining to answer. The only "rule" is that any answer has to be true... and it is 100% up to the asker to decide what to do with the answer or non-answer.
If I was in the game and asked a woman about anything that mattered to me, she would be perfectly free to decline to answer, and I would be equally free to assume that the reason for her silence is because she thinks her answer would be a deal-breaker.
As long as nobody lies, anyone can ask or answer anything, but nobody gets to decide how anyone else reacts to an answer... including if the answer is, "None of your business."
upsidedownbackwards 2y ago
My best friend has been with someone I don't like for a long time. We used to be able to talk about everything. Now I have to filter things that I don't want her finding out. I was pissed at the start but my dad told me "You can't expect someone to keep something that's bothering them from their partner." Now I don't know if I'm right to be pissed or not.
9b807a94cd717be9a7a1 2y ago
Most (if not all) of these statements will be a huge turn ON for modern women.
Sumpm 2y ago
He's so full of danger and excitement, and he says whatever he wants!
shardikprime 2y ago
Based sigma alpha
NoonTimeHoopsMVP 2y ago
At the end of the day, if they won't disclose then they have something shameful to hide and that renders them unworthy of serious commitment.
withrowsprings 2y ago
Man with a future looks for women without a past...
NBA_MSG 2y ago
Was talking to a girl once and she asked a lot about my job. Like 5 different messages all about my job. To keep the conversation going I asked about hers and she literally said she works at Noneya Business.
[deleted] 2y ago
Translation:
I want to know how much money you make so I can decide whether I want to date you and whether it's worth it to fuck you so I can get my grubbies on your stack.
moorekom Mod 2y ago
"What a coincidence! I work there as well. Wonder why we never met each other before."
TexasMilitia 2y ago
Girl: “yeah I had 17 boyfriends in 5 years, 3 kids and I talk to them all the time. That ain’t none of yo bizness!”
guy gets work-related text from female co-worker
Girl: “WHO IS THIS BITCH WHY SHE TEXTING YOU Y’ALL BE FUCKING I KNOW IT IMMA WHOOP HER ASS THIS WHY I CAIN’T TRUST NO MAN”
ZZoMBiEXIII 2y ago
"STOP SHAMING ME!"
Uh... no. Shame is a good thing. Embrace it, learn from it, and be introspective about yourself. It's this rad new thing they just came out with called accountability. Welcome to it!
[deleted] 2y ago
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ZZoMBiEXIII 2y ago
A fair question.
Admittedly, I was being glib in the original comment, but I can elaborate. She shouldn't be ashamed of her sexual past, but she also shouldn't lie about it. The original post from which all this sprang was a woman who was trying to hide her past. And lying to do so. That is what I was talking about when I said she should be ashamed and be accountable.
As for sleeping around ,I'd say the same thing to a woman or a man, it's better to be more selective who you invite into your bed. I accept that I'm older and way past my "sell-by" date so maybe I'm just not up to date with current social morays, but if it's not something a woman (or man) should feel shame over then why do so many (most of the ones we cover in the sub) feel the need to lie about it?
As with all things ,these are decisions that we all make. Own them. And accept that some men and women are not comfortable with that. And that is ok. But when you (not YOU, you, the hypothetical you) lie about it, then that person is making it a big deal.
Men are not complicated. They tend to want one thing from their partner. They want to feel special. And they want a woman who makes them feel special. And, I'm sorry to say it, but if a lady has a double or triple digit body count, those men may not be available to them anymore. I suspect most women are the same, but I have no right to speak on their behalf. If a dude has a body count that high, she has a right to know and back out if it makes her uncomfortable too. And you better believe that if I saw a guy lying about his high body count to a potential partner, I'd say the exact same thing to him too.
It's the accountability of choices, simple as that. Nothing wrong with being sexual in the least, if that's the life you're choosing to live. I'm just asking people (men and women) to understand that some folks aren't going to be comfortable with that and being uncomfortable with it is just as valid as someone thinking it's fine to take home a different person every night. Both are fine until deception gets involved.
And I'm sorry, but if a man (or woman) is going to take the plunge into marriage, then they are sharing a life. And that means all of it. Past, present, and future. And their potential partner has the right to know all of it if they so choose. Lying only hurts things and makes everything worse.
So yeah, that's where I stand. Call me old fashioned or out of date if you want, I certainly wear that badge.
I hope I answered you question fairly and honestly. Forgive me for not answering yesterday. I did see it, but I just didn't have the time to articulate everything and I felt you deserved a proper well thought out reply.
*edits for grammar and for clarity.
coldbrewboldcrew 2y ago
You’re telling on yourself.
Reread the comment you are replying to, poster didn’t mention number of sexual partners; only that shame is a feeling that can guide one to behavior that is more in-line with their own values.
[deleted] 2y ago
You're not shamed for having multiple partners in the past. The problem that we men have is NOT the sex, or who you fucked, or how many. Its the lying. It's that you lie about it. It's that you hide it. It's that you won't fucking come clean and be honest about it with a man you're expecting to pay your bills indefinitely. It's that you demand commitment and fidelity from him but you won't fucking be honest about who you are and what you have done.
Men are what they do. Women simply exist - but part of their existence is who they let into their vaginas. Because who you admit into your pussies says a lot about you. Who you let into your pussies is WHO YOU FUCKING ARE. And that's what you are demanding that a man commit to and "purchase" with his time, money, labor, attention, and resources. It's because you will not come clean and be honest about it.
It's also the differing treatment. It's that you fucked the shit out of 20 guys before, but you won't fuck the guy you demand commitment from. It's that you treat fuckboys like gold and relationship guys like shit.
You're not accountable for "having sex". You're accountable for having sex with other men, then lying about it to men you demand commitment from. You're accountable for treating the man you demand commitment from worse than you treat the men you gave your pussy away to. You're accountable for not fucking Commitment Guy the same way you fucked all your prior fuckboys. You're accountable for making Commitment Guy pay full freight while you gave away your pussy for free to men you demanded nothing from. You're accountable for not treating Commitment Guy well.
What you need to do is give Commitment Guy your pussy for the same price, and with the same frequency and enthusiasm, that you gave it to all the fuckboys for. THAT is what you need to do. What you need to do is "respect" Commitment Guy the same way you "respected" Fuckboy - and that's by giving Commitment Guy all the pussy he wants, when and how he wants it. Because that's what Fuckboy got.
See, we men look at all this, and say "welp, if our choices are stay incel or be Fuckboys, might as well be Fuckboys." Fuckboys are fuckboys because YOU create them.
Now that I've noticed it, This comment, which you left about 3 months ago, says more about you than I ever could. Here's the pertinent part:
You want men to commit to THAT? You want a man to commit to you knowing you might deprive him of yourself permanently?
That's what you say about yourself - despite you describing yourself in another comment as "very attractive" and "getting lots of male attention". That might not be your fault. But it is most definitely not my fault, it's not men's fault, and it is not society's fault. That's on you. That's who you are.
Good luck. I hope you get the help you need.
[deleted] 2y ago
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[deleted] 2y ago
It's not "you", personally. Most of this post had nothing to do with you personally. But in true female form, you took every last bit of it as if it was all about you.
You come here stomping around demanding dialogue, and then I give it to you and you're now mewling like a wounded puppy. I answered you very directly, and you're now complaining at me about it.
You clearly don't understand anything we are talking about here despite my explaining precisely how men come at these issues. I was extremely clear about men's positions on these things. You can't even begin to understand it. This is surprising: In light of your past, I would think you of all people would have some empathy. You clearly do not. Nor do you even care to understand where men are coming from.
Yeah, bullshit that this was an "episode". You said you "always" felt this way about yourself and that you "constantly" think about it. "Always". "Constantly". Those were YOUR words. YOURS. Not mine. YOURS.
I did not "stalk" you. I looked at PUBLIC reddit comments about yourself that YOU CHOSE to make public, on a PUBLIC social media aggregation site. If you don't want people commenting about things you say about yourself IN PUBLIC, then don't fucking say them in public.
this isn't the place for you. You take care.
Kindly-Town 2y ago
Women are interested in men's future so why can't men be interested to know their past.
booksnwhiskey 2y ago
A preemptive strike!
[deleted] 2y ago
Parody and satire.
I hope the point gets across.
The point is that women demand to know all that stuff and more about the men they date.
So if women get to know all this stuff, and want to know it, why are they so goddamn bent out of shape when a man wants to know about his woman's sexual past? Why are they so riled up whenever THEY get questioned about what THEY did and what THEY were/are?
RealNiceLady 2y ago
Cause they know your gonna hold it against them
[deleted] 2y ago
As I have said many times:
If it's casual sex, men don't get to know.
The minute you women start demanding commitment, exclusivity, and access to resources, it's not about holding anything against them. It's about the fact that the man gets to know whatever the fuck he wants to know about her. I think that's fair, because you women demand the right to know whatever you want to know about the men you consider for sex and commitment, including but not limited to where he works, how much money he makes, what he owns, his relationship history, who he fucked, whether he has kids by other women, whether he's ever been married before, and a host of other things. You "hold it against" men all the fucking time.
A man who's committing to a woman has the absolute right to know whatever the fuck he wants to know about that woman. With a woman he commits to, "his business" is whatever he decides it is.
And if you get judged for your body counts, then you fucking get judged for it. If he doesn't like your body count, then he doesn't. If he accepts it, then he does. Men are allowed to have whatever standards they want. Men are allowed to judge you however they want, when they want, where they want, based on anything they want. Men are allowed to offer or not offer relationships based on whatever they want.
What you call "you hold it against them", I call "having standards" and "getting what he wants".
ronoda12 2y ago
Also if men cannot lie about where they work, how much they make etc. then women cannot lie about their sexual past and body counts. If the former is made illegal so should be latter.
[deleted] 2y ago
It's not about illegality. It's about the fact that women want to know these things about men.
So if we can understand that women want to know these things about men; then we can understand that men want to know women's sexual pasts.
ronoda12 2y ago
I anticipate new laws will be made where if a man lies about work etc to a woman and has relationship it will be considered as rape.
moorekom Mod 2y ago
That's in the works.
InevitableOwl1 2y ago
Pretty sure there was an article about New York trying that
Also if he lies about his ultimate intentions
Goldmansachs3030 2y ago
Already in south asia, you cannot even file her abortion report as evidence for cheating and cruelty, but you must give out everything you own so as to give alimony to her sorry ass when the relationship did not last even 5 years.
thedukeinc 2y ago
Because most of them are disgusted by their own past and decide to hide it rather than confront it, and better themselves from their past their mistakes Don’t you know ‘introspection’ is a tool of the patriarchy?
NBA_MSG 2y ago
I don't think they're disgusted by their past. They are however looking to avoid any consequences from it.
There was a post last week, I think the girl was a hooker, and she was upset because the guy she was seeing and actually liked said that he'd never date a girl who was a sex worker. She was thinking about how to tell him the truth without losing him. She wasn't so disgusted about what she did but she was scared of the repercussions
thedukeinc 2y ago
Yes that is a good way to see it. Most of them are indeed afraid of consequences. I know a couple of women who aren’t proud of their past themselves and actively tried to hide the fact
Typo-MAGAshiv Mod 2y ago
A lot depends on the individual woman.
There are things they all have in common (such as hypergamy and being governed by emotions), but they aren't a monolith.
Tag: /u/NBA_MSG
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Blackbarnabyjones 2y ago
This is how I roll.
I am the laid back guy who doesn't react no matter what horrors I hear in front of them.
I have cringed in silent fear when alone though.
[deleted] 2y ago
Of course.
It's parody. It's satire.
[deleted] 2y ago
Nah this shit is real, its the fucking women unable UNABLE to take responsibility for their own actions.
If you call them out on it, they use biology against you and claim you're just mad you don't get laid or whatever.
Like recently I commented on a post about a girl mad at men cause her and her slutty friends had their nudes passed around by chads.
I said, well don't give nudes out and quit fucking those guys? Problem solved.
THEY went APE SHIT, saying I'm an "incel" and I'm just mad they wont fuck me and fuck those guys instead lol
They literally are saying "id rather fuck random chads and face the consequences than fuck the men who will treat me respectfully"
So those guys face no consequences, just the women. Its just hilarious they cant see how their behavior is causing it.
[deleted] 2y ago
Being male or female is irrelevant in this discussion. Simply put, don’t associate or be with assholes. Problem solved.
Typo-MAGAshiv Mod 2y ago
Tell them that actions and decisions have consequences, and welcome to adulthood and equality.
WornBlueCarpet 2y ago
Finally someone who can think coherently.
The other day I had pretty much the same discussion. There was a thread about how evil and despicable guys are for sharing the nudes girls send them.
I replied that yes, what those guys do is wrong, but how can anyone in this day and age be surprised that this can happen?
I tried giving this analogy: A guy wants to cross the road, sees that the light is green for him and just steps right into the street without looking left and right first. He gets hit by a car. Was the driver in the wrong? Yes, absolutely. But everyone would also agree that the pedestrian should have looked first. It's common sense. We even teach it to our children. The reason is that right or wrong, we can't control what others do, but we can control what we do. So instead of just trusting blindly that the drivers will always follow the rules 100%, we see it as the most natural thing in the world to take responsibility for your own actions and safety.
The same goes for drivers. If you heard about your friend being thrown out of his car in an accident, you would be sad, but also think he was an idiot for not wearing his seat belt. If everyone always followed the rules, wearing a seat belt would be unnecessary. But since you can't control what other people do, taking responsibility for your own safety is widely regarded as the smart thing to do.
But not when it comes to women sharing nudes.
For some reason most people think that she is the blameless victim when the bad boy jerk she fucks shared the nudes she sent him with his bros. Why!?!? She knew he was a bad boy jerk for crying out loud! How can it come as a surprise that he acted like a jerk! But no. They want the rights of an adult, and the responsibility and accountability of a toddler.
A surefire way of not having your nudes shared is to not take them in the first place. There. Problem solved. But no, lack of common sense in women is so widely accepted that in my country, mobile service providers advertise with providing legal help if your nudes are shared against your will. Jesus wept.
[deleted] 2y ago
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[deleted] 2y ago
Calm yourself. This is not a debate site. r/purplepilldebate is that way ------------>
Your body, your choice. You takes your chances, you gets what you get.
Don't give me this bullshit that you don't know what men are assholes and what men aren't. Women know. They fucking know. No woman gets with a player without knowing who and what he is, what he wants, and why he's there. You know EXACTLY what you're getting, who you're with, and what you're doing.
Women are fucking trained from birth about who and what men are, what they're about, what they want, and what they do. Women fucking know from like 6 years old what men want and how they operate. Literally EVERYONE tells you and carefully trains you about how to attract men, how to avoid "bad" men, what men are attractive, what men are not attractive, and what to do to get the men you want. You also get trained very early on about "nice guys" and simps, and you learn how to identify and avoid them. You learn ALL of this before you even fucking get to high school.
So don't come in here with the "babe in the woods" routine acting like you got hoodwinked, tricked, and swindled. Bullshit. You got EXACTLY what you bargained for - a hot player who then takes what he wants, treats you how he wants, and then goes where he wants and does what he wants, your preferences be damned.
"We don't know we're dealing with assholes" GTFOH with that horseshit.
WornBlueCarpet 2y ago
A lot of women are attracted to bad boys. No, not all. But a lot are. Don't try to tell me that you have never seen this in action. I don't know any guys who hasn't, at some point, had a female friend or family member who dated someone, where said guy thinks "why is she with him? He's a jerk!". And eventually they break up because he's a jerk. And then, to everyone’s surprise, he acts like a jerk. I've seen it several times. And sometimes the woman doesn't learn the first time, so she starts dating another jerk after that. No, not all women date guys they know are jerks. But also, not all women get their nudes shared. Could there be a correlation there somewhere?
And again, if you don't send your nudes to anyone, they can't share them, can they? Even better, don't take them in the first place. I don't understand how this isn't common sense.
Ask any girl, if she inherited $100k, would she give them to that boy who she has dated for two months for safekeeping? No? If she doesn't trust him with that kind of money, why then does she trust him with intimate naked photos of herself?
If women stop sending nudes to guys they have no real reason to trust, 90%+ of this problem would disappear.
Goldmansachs3030 2y ago
Like they said, stop giving out nudes and fucking randomly, problem solved and you are welcome to read the whole subreddit before telling woman this and that, bcz yeah, its the same.
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[deleted] 2y ago
What do you mean you can't always avoid assholes easily? That's bullshit right there. Yes you can. You simply choose not to avoid them - you choose, quite deliberately, to fuck them.
Know why? "Asshole" = "attractive men". Attractive men usually are assholes because they can be assholes - there are very few negative consequences for being an attractive asshole. In fact, women love assholes - you women date, fuck, and reproduce with them all the time.
Women love dating, fucking, and reproducing with assholes. How do I know this? You women do this all the time.
whyserenity 2y ago
You can choose to never take explicit photos of yourself. In fact that is something normal people never do.
NoonTimeHoopsMVP 2y ago
You can easily avoid sending nude photos. In fact, it is easily done by not taking the photos. Wow!
Listen, nude photos usually happen for two reasons. 1. The girl is trying to entice the guy. 2. The guy is asking for them.
The easy solutions:
But as another poster said, modern women want all the pleasures without the responsibilities or consequences.
Impressive-Cricket-8 Endorsed 2y ago
"The past doesn't matter" - Charles Mason.
Silent-Service-5075 2y ago
Saving this
thedukeinc 2y ago
When I was younger, 3rd or 4th date used to be in an exotic country. That is not me anymore. Wine, Netflix and chill is now my idea of a perfect date
loneliness-inc Mod 2y ago
Gentlemen,
Women are human beings, men are human doings.
This is the reason why men seek women whose beings are untarnished.
And women seek men who excel in their doings, their accomplishments.
If a woman can ask you about your past doings, you can ask her about things that might tarnish her being as a woman, wife and/or mother.
Whether you like it or not, whether you think it's fair or unfair - the reality is, that men value sexual purity in a woman. Conversely, men are disgusted by female promiscuity in their long term partners.
You may draw the line at 1, 10, 100 or 1,000. It doesn't matter. That's just your personal preference. The fact remains that the overwhelming majority of men, don't want to marry the town bicycle!
They don't want to, out of disgust!
This is true even of men who are feminist allies. Men who are shocked at their own disgust. Nevertheless, the disgust remains because it's part of nature itself.
Sex is either a frivolous thing like a handshake, or it's this deep, meaningful, intimate connection that's the foundation of marriage.
It can't be both.
If sex is as frivolous as a handshake, it wouldn't matter how many people she had sex with, just as it doesn't matter how many people she shook hands with. If this was the case, there would also be no point in ever making the massive investment that is marriage.
But sex is a sacred, foundational part of marriage. It's the main thing that women bring to marriage in the first place! That's why her past matters. That's why it matters how often she has sex with her husband.
If she rode the whole town, she can go eat a dick. She made her bed, now she can sleep in it.
Cheers!
[deleted] 2y ago
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[deleted] 2y ago
This isn’t a debate sub.
You don’t understand satire. Or illustrating absurdity by being absurd
[deleted] 2y ago
1) Men and women are NOT the same.
Men are judged on WHAT they do, and their honesty and forthrightness about those things. Women are judged on WHO they do, and how many, and their honesty and forthrightness about those men.
2) Who a woman lets into her pussy says a lot about her. Who women fuck and have fucked says a lot about her.
Revolutionary_Town21 2y ago
Just beautiful!! Such a fantastic way of explaining. Love you brother
loneliness-inc Mod 2y ago
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loneliness-inc Mod 2y ago
You mean to say that:
You're a man.
You aren't married.
Please listen to what you're saying! You're making a contradictory argument based on feeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeelings. You ignored the logic of my argument and instead, you're going with what feeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeelz right to you.
But as mentioned above:
You're a man. You aren't a woman. As a human doing, the value you bring to a marriage is not sex.
You aren't married. You don't yet know that a BF/GF situationship is not the same as marriage.
Please read this post before you respond.
You're welcome to present a coherent argument for your disagreement once you read it.
[deleted] 2y ago
Men and women are not the same.
You aren't judged on having casual sex. If anything, people will judge you harshly for NOT having had casual sex. Of course your girl doesn't hold it against you - your sexual experience means you have some value.
It's less about a woman having had casual sex than it is (1) her honesty about her sexual past; and (2) her willingness to give her current man anything and everything the men before him got for the same price and with the same frequency and enthusiasm.
Goldmansachs3030 2y ago
Its slutty, not too slutty or something else.
Grimmaldo 2y ago
You think, you shouldnt be on this sub
[deleted] 2y ago
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Grimmaldo 2y ago
\•>•/
[deleted] 2y ago
Bye
loneliness-inc Mod 2y ago
You beat me to it
dardy_sing 2y ago
Disgust at a high notch count/promiscuity in women may have arisen through evolutionary processes. I.e. Before humans had reliable contraception a highly promiscuous woman would have likely been a liability to her “tribe”. Getting pregnant would require other tribe members (and the father) to provide for her as she would not be able to fend for herself while heavily pregnant. And if she was promiscuous and didn’t know who the father was (or he bailed on her) the tribe would have to pick up the slack or she would likely perish. Whereas a promiscuous guy is not incapacitated and can still fend for himself if he got a female pregnant and did a runner.
Then there’s the risk to her own life while giving birth in the absence of modern healthcare/medicine.
Obviously getting pregnant often would exacerbate these issues.
whyserenity 2y ago
Nope. As long as humans have been alive they have been figuring out birth control. They’ve found proof even the most ancient Egyptians used the pelts of small animals for birth control purposes.
dardy_sing 2y ago
Key word being “reliable”.
Just because Egyptians had some form of contraception doesn’t mean all races did. Show me the contraception method used by Australian Aboriginals or Native Americans for instance. And good luck relying on an animal pelt
dardy_sing 2y ago
And also, what do you think would happen to all the modern day baby mamas if there was no government support for single mothers? Do u see it being likely they will be capable of providing for themselves given what you’ve seen in this sub forum? Or will her family or “tribe” have to contribute to her and her offsprings survival?
Hmmm?
whyserenity 2y ago
Who cares? I’m all for them actually suffering the consequences of their actions. We have homeless military veterans all over the country that need help but the government totally ignores. Those are the people we should be taking care of, not women that can’t keep their legs closed.
dardy_sing 2y ago
How the fk is that relevant to what I was originally talking about? My point was promiscuous women that get pregnant often to multiple baby daddies are a liability to society/their tribe. As has been the case in the past and in current times. Consequently we’ve likely evolved as a species to be repelled by those type of women.
Get it?
SpiritualEnema 2y ago
I will tell you my credit score tho…. It’s “304”
See what I did there?? What? It’s your score too?
jymssg 2y ago
A perfect match!
SnakeEyeskid 2y ago
I used to use drugs. Well I still do but I used to use to...
Thats how men see the "my past and future is not related"-social constructivist argument and often how it plays out in reality. You can't undo shit.
[deleted] 2y ago
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[deleted] 2y ago
says the guy who's made a career out of posting on video game sites.
Take it somewhere else, Cheeto-boy.
Reala_Tea 2y ago
This is the romantic equivalent of telling a car dealer your credit history is off-limits.
You will be auto-rejected in either case for the same reason.
[deleted] 2y ago
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Typo-MAGAshiv Mod 2y ago
Do you believe in the Easter Bunny too?
[deleted] 2y ago
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[deleted] 2y ago
An individual's sexual history can be as private as she wants it to be. And then men have the right to do whatever they wish with that noninformation, including choosing not to have a relationship with that woman. Men have the right to judge that woman however they wish.
A woman's past sexual history is important to some men, merely because they want to know it. He wants to know it. Who are you to judge him for wanting to know whatever he wants to know about a woman? It's his right to want to know it.
She doesn't have to share her sexual history, ever. Men don't have to invest in her, ever. And men are within their rights to not invest in her, for whatever reasons they want.
There is no "rage" here. It's only pointing up women's hypocrisy.