Summary

  • FWB for two years goes crazy after "cheating" on her boyfriend rather than face consequences

  • FWB accused me of stalking/assault to the police -- I get a restraining order against me; unable to commute to work/school; also lost part-time job at local hospital

  • FWB accused me of sexual assault through the college -- I risk academic suspension / destroyed future career prospects

  • College sides with her as expected, threatening me and actively trying to frame me

  • I manage to stand my ground by recording interrogations, demanding parents to be present, saving and providing records of communication, getting a lawyer

Body

Here’s a bit of background about me. I am now in my last year at college and one of the best students. The admissions committee often requests to have me speak at recruitment events; I’m considered a posterchild of my college. My parents are now selling our house to pay for legal fees related to this upsetting situation; we’re all moving away this next year.

A year ago, I was falsely accused of stalking and sexual assault by a Tinder girl (AKA Jizz Guzzling Jezebel). Jezebel is a student at my college. We had been in a casual sex relationship (FWB) the past two years, and we’ve both seen other people during that time as well. I was always told that she was in open relationships with other guys. Toward the end of our FWB relationship she often told me that her more serious “boyfriend” was unhappy with her hanging out with me. At the same time, Jezebel started asking if I would consider dating her; I had never given a satisfactory answer and she would react in frustration. Despite that, Jezebel continued to ask me to visit her at her work, hang out with her, and also if I wanted her to provide blowjobs and the like. Note, she works at a convenience store a couple blocks away from my residence.

Jezebel and I had a very normal, consensual relationship. In retrospect, it seems that Jezebel was having significant emotional struggles with her open relationship and sought comfort from me. I did not become her emotional blanket and shoulders, since I was honest about only wanting a sexual relationship. Jezebel and her boyfriend abruptly broke up, and she filed reports to both our college and city police. Jezebel obtained a restraining order against me on the basis of stalking and one incident of sexual assault. However, to the college she reported no stalking and two incidences of sexual assault. Clearly from the start, her fabrications were painfully inconsistent.

I immediately told my parents about my situation, and they were absolutely appalled by Jezebel’s accusations. Of course, I showed evidence of communication (text and social media messages) which contradicted Jezebel’s fabricated stories. My parents were incredibly upset and worried for my future. We worked together to find a local lawyer. I am so pained for having my parents suffer like so, but I am grateful they were here to support me.

Now, the restraining order prevented me from being within a range of her workplace - this consisted the majority of campus. My residence was at the very edge of this perimeter. For months, I could barely step outside my residence and I had to navigate a much longer route to work. In fact, I was unable to continue working at a part-time job I had at a hospital which was on the same block (had to quit without explaining why). This restraining order was an “ex parte”, a legal term meaning it was granted without the otherside (me) being heard. To appeal, I had to attend a court hearing and pay a $400 fee (which I had been able to waive due to my low income status). This hearing was set weeks later, and of course until then the order remained effective. My new route home after work (~midnight) was through a dimly lit street known for frequent muggings and robberies. I had some close encounters, but I walk at a very quick pace.

With the college, investigators were demanding to meet ASAP during finals week. Of course the entire team of investigators were female. With the stress of a 20 credit hour course load and risking suspension/expulsion, I began to fall into a great depression. The investigators were threatening me with suspension and expulsion if I did not meet with them immediately. They also refused to provide any details as to the accusations made against me. I did two things here: 1) I got my parents involved and present at the meetings, and 2) I audio recorded all conversations. This is where the investigators will lie and tell you it’s illegal to record them (likely not, depending on state laws). Do not give in, and do not go alone to these meetings. Do not expect the investigators to be on your side or believe you whatsoever. When I was at these meetings with my parents, I demanded to see a written statement of Jezebel’s accusations. The investigators did not provide this, stating that their process is to only do oral communication for complaints. These people will try their best to trick you; the investigators will not tell you her claims and will continue to interrogate you. This is called “leading questions”, where they try to elicit a specific response (i.e. self-incrimination). My lawyer also contacted the investigators to stop them from interrogating me; they of course ignored him and proceeded to threaten me again. During the meetings I maintained my frame and integrity, while providing clear evidence of our communication which contradicted Jezebel’s accusations. Again, these investigators are not on your side. Despite having presented so much evidence, the investigators were appalled that I suggested that Jezebel was making up her story. The only resource on campus that assisted me would be counseling services. During this time, I had been anxious and fearful of my education and bright future being robbed. I had worked so hard and gave back to my college community through service and volunteering. I felt absolutely betrayed. My therapy sessions with a psychologist had prevented me from successful suicide attempts.

After multiple meetings with the college investigators, a final report was made. I received the report while working at a volunteering event. My heart was racing as I feared the worst outcome. However, the conclusion made was that I was innocent. Apparently, during investigative meetings, Jezebel had described numerous sexual acts which she admitted as consensual. For example, Jezebel reported she willingly groped me, provided blowjobs, and vocalized her enjoyment during such acts. Jezebel made incredibly detailed lies, which ultimately led to her account falling apart. Despite her own statements contradicting her awful claims, the college investigators called me a liar and insulted me in the report. The investigators wrote several times that they believe Jezebel and that her claims were true. Unfortunately, the college policy allows for Jezebel to appeal the decision, which she did. A college hearing date was sent several weeks following. I could not believe Jezebel could continue to harass me; this was an example of “double jeopardy”, where I was being tried again despite overwhelming evidence supporting my innocence. During this time, the restraining order hearing came up. The weekend before the court hearing, I was at the last straw with my sanity. I had even jumped out of a window because my mind was falling apart. I thought that this whole situation would never end.

The night before the court hearing, I couldn’t sleep; I laid on my bed tossing and turning. I even got up and paced outside at 3am. I arrived to the court an hour before the hearing time. Jezebel showed up much later with a team of SJWs and a lawyer; note, she didn’t have to pay for a lawyer due to pro bono services for “abused victims”. Her team of SJWs formed a human wall as to prevent me from looking at her in the hallway. They stared at me with anger and contempt. Absolutely absurd. During the court hearing, my lawyer presented my evidence of messaging and communications showing 1) her invitations to hang out and visit her at work, 2) her sexual suggestions, and 3) her frequent requests to date. I wish I had recorded her reaction. Upon seeing the evidence, Jezebel’s lawyer dropped the case. The hearing lasted ten minutes and the judge commended me for showing up and having to deal with it. I turned and walked out the room without looking at Jezebel. I could not believe it. The whole day, I spent it worried that it was all a dream. I feared that it was all a hallucination, my mind playing more tricks on me. It was not, and I am a free man.

Now, I still had to deal with the college hearing; I was told that they had to change the procedures because it was the first time that the accused was found innocent and the accusing student wanted to appeal that decision. Several times throughout the hearing, my lawyer had made objections. The appointed judge at the college hearing had no idea what she was doing - the secretary had to explain to her what that meant. Clearly, they were not prepared... The school paid for her lawyer at this hearing, who tried to make the case that not all victims of sexual assault will fight back and will even remain silent. My lawyer pointed out that she admitted to voluntarily performing sexual acts and even at one point admitted that she provided verbal consent. Jezebel brought “witnesses”, who were her friends that claim she was so sad that her boyfriend left her and was no longer as friendly as she used to be. There was literally no relevance here. My lawyer simply asked if they were in the room during the time of the accused assault - to which they said no, of course not. During the cross-examination of Jezebel, she squirmed as my lawyer questioned her. Jezebel actually yelled out when my lawyer pointed out all the messages where she blatantly admitted she loved having sex with me and she wanted to blow me. After this whole ordeal, the jury, consisting of almost all women, unanimously decided I was innocent.

I could not believe that even after months of fighting and proving Jezebel was wrong, the school still pandered to her needs. For example, they provided her a “safe space” with several SJWs to wait with her during the hearing. Jezebel was allowed to step in and out as she pleased, while I had to remain throughout the whole time. When the decision came out in my favor, Jezebel immediately posted “her story” on social media and identified my name. Jezebel started a witch hunt. I went to the school, and they told me that they’ve never dealt with this sort of situation before, where the accused was found innocent and the accusing started this online harassment. The school told me that they will discuss whether they should do anything about it…. And they even pointed out to me that if I had done that I would immediately be expelled. But since Jezebel is the alleged “victim”, it’s difficult to figure out what to do. I couldn’t believe that Jezebel was allowed to push her false narrative. I then completely realized that all the resources at the school were there to support women accusing men, and they never even considered what to do when the man was proven innocent.

Words cannot describe how horrifying this entire experience was; anxiety ate away at me every day. I slowly succumbed to madness and I feared simply stepping outside my residence. During my therapy sessions with the counselor, I learned something of personal importance. My greatest strength was my incredibly sharp sense of logic and reasoning; this is what allowed me to rise to the top of my class and impress the faculty and staff. However, this was also my greatest weakness. Every day for months, I asked myself why Jezebel would do this, how on earth she could even think to invent lies and hurt me. Jezebel abused the system and society enabled it, and I tried so hard to understand why. It was the eventual realization that no one was as logical or reasonable as I, which had freed me from my mental prison. Every woman in this situation (e.g. Jezebel, collegiate investigators, etc.) is not rational, and I cannot expect them to be so. My fearful thoughts consumed every minute of each day, and I suffered until I was proven innocent. Actually, I still suffer so, even despite being proved innocent.

I still have trouble taking the normal route to work, since I am so accustomed to taking the long round-about path. Clearly, I still suffer from this traumatic experience. My hands still shake as I write this story. I will never trust women, and it will be years until I can go a day without thinking about this situation. Society is discriminating against men, where women can obtain restraining orders without evidence and continue to harass men by abusing the justice system. However, this experience has made me a much stronger man; I will never allow women to take advantage of me nor rob me of my future. Recovery will take time, but I will live my life to the fullest. I will achieve my dreams and build wealth to protect the people I care about.

Lessons Learned

  • When facing accusations, immediately get a lawyer and limit your interactions with collegiate or government officials. Say as little as possible; maintain frame and integrity.

  • Save all messages on every communication platform. DO NOT DELETE. Also, record conversations with collegiate officials regardless of their lies.

  • Society, especially collegiate kangaroo courts, openly discriminate against men. Women will not have to pay any legal fees whatsoever.

  • That said, money is a necessary asset in life. Legal fees are expensive, so start an emergency savings account.

  • AWALT: emotionally unstable and will lash out to avoid facing consequences. Identify red flags and be aware of crazy. Logic and rationality will not apply.

  • Find support in your parents, MALE best friend, or someone you completely trust.

  • A life without freedom or future is not worth living. Always protect yourself and make careful decisions.

Thank you TRP, for listening to my story about the collegiate kangaroo courts and the Jizz Guzzling Jezebel.