Here is some background for context:
I am a 24-year-old law student dating a 21-year-old. I recently discovered this reddit after seeing someone mention TRP in a comment on a Stefan Molynuex youtube video. I fell into a daze reading all the sidebar material. EVERYTHING made sense to me. For the first time in my life, I UNDERSTOOD the behavior of the women around me. I gained enormous clarity into my own actions as well. I have been in a LTR for 2.5 years. We have lived in the same apartment for 1 year... I lived with three buddies in a badass house near our university during the first year of the relationship, but decided to get a place with my girl when I started law school for more stability and quiet. She was 18 when we met and I took her virginity. She graduated in only 2 years. She’s very smart and driven in her field. She’s HB7, but truly stood out to me on a personal/intellectual level which is why I made her my girlfriend and not just a FWB.
Living with her hasn't been an issue, I actually really like it - but I understand it is not ideal according to TRP.
Alright, so three weeks ago I saw my girl was texting some unknown guy. She is occasionally communicating with coworkers and/or members of a running club she's involved-in, so the first night I observed her texting this guy right next to me on the couch - I said nothing. We have never had issues with flirting or cheating in the past so to me, nothing was out of the ordinary if she's sending a few texts. I'm pretty secure with myself and do not feel threatened by other guys when it comes to my girl. I wasn’t looking over her shoulder or interrogating her about the conversation.
The very next day she comes home from work and walks through the front door while on the phone with THIS SAME FUCKING DUDE. I was sitting at the kitchen table reading cases for school when she arrived. I greet her and don’t say anything more – I focus on my work. She quickly goes to the bedroom and continues the call for another 5 minutes. I can’t help but listen to her laughing and borderline flirting with this guy (“haha that was SO funny when you said that to her today at lunch” and “No I don’t have any plans tomorrow after work other than happy hour with everyone – you should come with us it’s fun”) Later that night (9pm) when we are both chilling in the livingroom I notice that she is rapidly carrying on with this guy again via text.
THIS is the point where pre-RP me would have lost his cool and confronted her by demanding to see the texts and wanting to know how she knew this guy/why is she so friendly with him, etc. This approach would have undoubtedly resulted in a fight with her being defensive and I would have been very upset. We most likely would have made up that same night and fucked and gone to sleep – prolonging the issue and the ultimate fight/break-up/her cheating.
Post-RP me handled the situation as follows; I told her to put the phone down, she did. I said that it’s not okay for any girlfriend of mine to be talking to guys in the fashion that she was carrying on with this random dude. I said very plainly that it’s unacceptable for her to disrespect me this way. I told her that I obviously don’t care that she talks to other men in a professional context, but that I could see this instance was beyond professionalism for her job. I stated that I make the choice every day to not engage in a similar way with other women out of respect for her. And with that I went to the bedroom, put on some shoes, grabbed a coat, and said “I’m going to [buddies’ name]’s place for the night” as I walked out the door. I heard her weakly say “what? Don’t go…” her voice trembling as the crying commenced.
She immediately blew up my phone with calls and texts. I ignored all of it and calmly drove to my destination. About an hour later she texted saying that she was going to drive to my friend’s place to talk to me and I replied “Don’t come here. Give me space tonight.” This was the only response I gave her throughout the entire ordeal. I hungout with my buddy and crashed at his place for the night. She gave-up calling and leaving voicemails after a while, but my phone received texts from her until 3am. This was a weeknight when she would otherwise have been asleep by 11pm. She told me how much she loved me, she begged me to come home, she couldn’t sleep without me in bed with her, she justified the conversations with the other guy by saying he was just a friend from work, he has a girlfriend, she isn’t interested in him in any way, she has never done anything with any other guy since being with me, she didn’t want to ruin things with me, she shouldn’t have been so stupid, she should’ve realized that I wouldn’t stand for this kind of thing, she wanted me for herself and begged me to not break up with her because I would find another girl “in a week” (her words) and move on with my life without her.
You get the idea.
The next day I went to school without calling her. In the afternoon she texted me asking if I would be home when she got home from work. I replied “No, playing soccer with [friend, friend, friend] then I don’t know.”
Around 7 o’clock she texted to tell me that she went straight home after work, skipping happy hour with coworkers. She was cleaning the apartment and doing laundry. She organized all of my cycling gear in the spare bedroom (this area is usually an unsightly mess of my bikes, disassembled frames, wheels, water bottles and helmets, tools, and racks stretching across the floor and hanging on hooks in the walls). She wanted to make “my favorite dinner”. She asked if I would join her at the apartment. I didn’t reply, but I did drive home.
When I walked in she jumped on me and would not let me go. I hugged her back and she cried, apologized profusely for disrespecting me, and told me that she had one of the worst nights of her life when I left her home alone because she would never get over me if I left her for good. She thanked me for being with her so long and went on and on about how we met and how she was so surprised that I wanted a relationship because she knew I had been single and was seeing multiple girls up until the day I was exclusively hers.
**It’s worth noting here that I had a FWB hanging all over me the night my girlfriend was introduced to me during a party at my old house.
I said VERY little and tried my best not to show emotion or too much gratitude for what she had done. My girlfriend cooked me dinner. She showed me how much extra space the spare bedroom had when my bikes were lined up neatly and the tools were in a box on the shelf. She showed off the cleanliness of the bathroom and kitchen. She gave me a 30 minute back massage in bed, and then proceeded to ride my cock every way she knows.
SO IN CONCLUSION – before I was exposed to TRP, I was a male that unknowingly demonstrated a mixture of alpha and beta traits. This inconsistent behavior ON MY PART left me in a baffled state wherein I would have success with women and enjoy the attention they showed me, but inevitably undermine myself with BP actions.
The FIRST time I decided to practice my ability to walk away from my woman – she chased. She has genuinely been a shining example of what I want in a girlfriend ever since. And I believe this will continue as long as I build up a solid frame and continue to swallow TRP.
After continuing to explore RP theory and strategy I learned that I may have unknowingly executed a "soft-next" on my girl.
Seriously, THANK YOU guys.