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- Hide Preview | 58 Comments | submitted 3 months ago by Harry_Wangs [Post Locked]

I've observed both through personal and anecdotal experience, that the advice of "sleep with many women, have many plates" to avoid oneitis is not sufficient. In fact, it can lead to even greater oneitis.

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Blue Pill Oneitist

You see, back in Blue Pill Beta days, we got Oneitis because of scarcity and because we believed the one we loved was inherently special. However, this oneitis was illogical - bred from scarcity. A blue pill beta Bob, once rejected, could easily repeat the same blue pill fantasy with the next girl.

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Alpha/Purple Pill Oneitist

Now, as a young Alpha that is slaying 1-3 girls per month (when I'm not in purposeful monk mode) and has N>10 this year while having spent months of this year in a relationship, I find I can still fall into oneitis. Except this time - oneitis has changed. Out of the numerous dates I've been on this year, women I've met and slept with, I've only found myself really connecting with 1 of them.

That's right out of all the women this year I only had a strong connection with one (no surprised, I failed with her). However, unlike in Blue Pill Days, now, I can say with certainty that this girl, this woman, truly seems more special because I've had so much experience.

This means, the more women you've been with, the stronger oneitis can become.

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However, there are some useful mindsets to aid you with this

Mindset #1 - Gratitude for Failure

Be grateful and happy that you did not succeed with your oneitis because you are not strong. Think about how fucked up your life would be if you truly followed your past oneitis (you are no longer a leader with a oneitis remember, you are a follower to the oneitis). Think about your future potential and think about the great men of this world. How many of them would achieved what they had done if they had a oneitis to satisfy their live's being? Think about how much you can use pain to push you forward, instead of being intoxicated and drowsy from the feelings of oneitis. If your ambition is to start a business that changes the world, but your oneitis wants you working a stable job, you will listen to your oneitis. Your oneitis might not be a bad person, but because you have oneitis you will become an ineffective leader for both your relationship and your life - in the end both will fail.

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Mindset #2 - Tastes Change

Your oneitis might really be the best girl for you, but that's just at this moment. Ask any married couple and they will tell you how much they and their spouse has changed over the years. Even if your oneitis doesn't become a she-devil, both you and her will change so much over the course of 10 years. This same criteria you use to evaluate women that made her your oneitis might be completely different 10 years from now.

As men on our self-improvement journey, we change more significantly than most. Along with my own change, my taste in women keeps changing. 10 years from now, the very same girl you have oneitis over could no longer be your taste. Your taste for adventurous girls/religious girls/introverted/extroverted/curvy/fit/latino all these things will likely change over time. I am so glad I did not get any of my oneitis my early years of college. They are not bad women by any means, in fact they are still great girls and would make good girlfriends/wives, but they are just completely not my taste anymore.

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Mindset #3 - Acceptance

Accept that you have oneitist and identify it as soon as possible. The more advanced you are on the Red Pill Alpha journey, the harder it is to admit that you are human and fell into oneitist. Fighting this will only make it worse. Accept that you have oneitist. Accept that you think she's special, but know it is time to move on.

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Mindset #4 - Beep, beep I'm a computer

Spend less time evaluating women, only gather data computer. You are a very simple machine. Red Pill men are generally pretty good at evaluating women and their character. We connect the dots to come to a conclusion and our conclusions are generally correct. Yet this same process makes is susceptible to flaws and creating oneitis.

When applied to a oneitis our brain makes too many conclusions that are not necessarily true. For instance, if we see a few positive interactions between her and her family, we should not say "she has a good relationship with her family and is family oriented". Instead, like a computer or a machine we should tell ourselves "I've observed 3 positive interactions, that is not enough to draw a conclusion". In data science you usually need minimum of 30 samples to understand the pattern of the data. A sample size that is can be skewed too much by outliers or small trends. While we do not need to have a minimum 30 sample size threshold to evaluate a girl's behavior, the same principle applies - we need many data points and until then, we do not need to draw ANY hard conclusion. A few data points can simply be the outlier.

*with negative behavior/traits, we do not need so much evidence. Very few instances of bad behavior = bad behavior, especially early on when she is on her best behavior.

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Conclusion

Oneitis is a hell of a drug and a disease. If these mindsets help for even a few of you on TRP, I'll be satisfied. Oneitis can destroy lives. Unfortunately, as Red Pill men, we are still human and can fall prey to this vicious disease. Sleeping with more women is not always enough - because it is all external. Having some of these useful mindsets help to cure what's inside.

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[-] snowmoose1 43 Points 3 months ago

“just your turn” —> pure fucking loser mentality. If there is one thing you are then it is the prize! PRIZE. It’s her turn. God i thought that was TRP rule #1

[-] Zech4riah 18 Points 3 months ago

No need to be delusional tho. Irrational self confidence is good only to a certain point.

The man who needs to keep telling himself that he is the prize, certainly is not a one (yet).

[-] [deleted] 3 months ago
[-] ex_addict_bro 28 Points 3 months ago

I've only found myself really connecting with 1 of them.

My theory: oneitis is scarcity mindset. If it happened so, it means that this one single girl has some of the qualities others don't (and I am NOT talking about you idealising herself in your own mind, just facts). For example, if she's a petite brunette 20-yo, go outside and approach more petite brunette 20-yo girls. Maybe it's her age, maybe her hair, maybe something else.

EDIT: let me repeat: objective qualities, not whatever fantasy your mind comes up with.

There is nothing special about that particular woman. There's only your idealisation.

If you find yourself idealising women you meet early, seek professional help.

[-] Harry_Wangs 13 Points 3 months ago

It is true, it is a type of scarcity mentality. However, it is a different type of scarcity than the traditional blue pill (OMG a not obese girl likes me it's one of a kind).

It's like if you meet a virgin 10/10 lingerie model who has good family values and you vibe with her well. Sure, there are others like her out there, but certainly not many and it's not easy to find. There is a real scarcity of women like her, and not a fake blue pill scarcity.

Or you just fucked 100 girls and one of them you're able to connect with on an emotional level. Sure, you can find another one of her again, but you know you might need to go through another year, or another 100 girls to find another like her. You'll become, understandably, a bit needier

[-] ex_addict_bro 4 Points 3 months ago

Virgin and model... dude, you’re in the fantasy realm

Same for emotional connection

This is all a plot that in the end has a common end point... semen extraction.

You like to lie to yourself boy

[-] Trenned_out 6 Points 3 months ago

I don't think you comprehended his comment at all. Virgin model with family values is infact hyperbole to illustrate his point about qualities that are scarce and thus produce the desire in a man to invest more in that woman.

[-] ex_addict_bro 3 Points 3 months ago

I don't think you comprehended his comment at all.

Thanks mate but no need to worry.

Virgin model with family values is infact hyperbole

There are hyperboles, there is science-fiction, there are fairy tales and there is OP injecting crocodile with his "virgin 10/10 lingerie model".

[-] Harry_Wangs 1 Point 3 months ago

You aren't getting it. The example is simply to describe a woman that is extremely rare or may not even exist.

There isn't going to be an abundance of that particular woman.

FYI, Adriana Lima was (supposedly) a virgin until marriage. Even if she wasn't a virgin and her n-count was low, there aren't many Adriana Lima super models for me to LTR or game.

Similarly, with men, there aren't going to be many Richard Bransons, Larry Ellisons or Elon Musks in the world. Sure, as a woman you have an abundance of men too, but you aren't exactly going to find many Richard Bransons to date.

[-] Battagliare 2 Points 3 months ago

On swallowing the pill the only thing i am struggling with is this oneitis stuff, espacially when im in a situation like "My theory: oneitis is scarcity mindset. If it happened so, it means that this one single girl has some of the qualities others don't" this.

Do you have any advice for it ? or something to read on this subject ?

[-] VickVaseline 1 Point 3 months ago

Have you read the sidebar, The Rational Male in particular?

[-] Battagliare 1 Point 3 months ago

The Rational Male is more about the plate theory and general rules of male-female dynamics. Same goes for sidebar too. I couldn't find anything specific about Oneitis and how to solve it. (Not talking about blue-pill fantasy debunking stuff, but im talking about direct articles deeply delving the oneitis issue)

[-] disgruntledearthling 1 Point 3 months ago

I couldn't find anything specific about Oneitis and how to solve it.

Then you haven't read RM enough.

[-] VickVaseline 1 Point 3 months ago

Agreed. There is a lot of material there. OP can jump to:

https://therationalmale.com/2011/08/30/there-is-no-one/

Edit: I mean Battagliare, not OP.

[-] [deleted] 3 months ago
[-] Noblefiz 1 Point 3 months ago

The only surefire way to get rid of oneitis is to develop an abundance mentality. Fuck lots of chicks, spin plates and take that one girl off the pedestal. You really haven't looked hard if you're saying you can't find anything on how to solve oneitis.

[-] [deleted] 3 months ago
[-] ex_addict_bro 1 Point 3 months ago

All advice is in my original comment, 2 levels up

[-] Zech4riah 3 Points 3 months ago

It can be a result of (too great amount of) scarcity but I've gotten oneitisy feelings for two girls at the same time. Both of the girls had to qualities I like. Also I noticed that my feelings went in cycles. I would like more the girl I spent time with most recently. I kind of see some elements of scarcity there but I don't think it's bad.

I think that some level scarcity is good and to some extent - even required to feel good about someone because when something becomes common, it doesn't feel that good anymore and it loses it's value. (Can be used as a tool as well - 48 Laws of Power - Law 16# - Absence and creating value through scarcity). But ofc, you must pay attention and not to let the level of scarcity become too great. That's where you become sloppy/weak.

[-] Trenned_out 2 Points 3 months ago

Bro this really hits home. I think it's alot more nuanced version of scarcity mindset. I know I'm over 70 n-count, fucked 4 different girls in a week multiple times, 2 in a day etc. It's rare I get a real emotional connection with a girl though. So when the a girl with the potential for that comes along, I have to REALLY watch myself that I don't slip back undoing years of progrses.

[-] ahg1008 18 Points 3 months ago

Honestly. I think you lack true goal/purpose in life. If you did have a solid goal backed with micro and macro action plan to get it -you won't need to feel 'connected' to some unicorn.

And by a goal I don't mean I'll weigh x pounds and have y% bf and bang 'z' HB 10's. That's either something you must do(health) or some fun shit(fucking etc) you indulge in. A goal has to be something solid - something that makes you rise amongst men in lets say a few years and you get ypur happiness from that. Everything else - women and shit is just desert you eat after the main meal.

That way it doesn't matter. Unicorn changes or not , you change or not . You work towards your goal and good, vetted bitches are welcome to stay or leave.

I am not from a western country. I find it weird how westerners have this huge fetish - connect with women n unicorns and what not. Why would a grown ass man feel the need to get connected ?

But perhaps that's what happens when a society becomes more developed, more comfort based. Emotions are important when everything else is sorted. If everyday was a struggle to get your needs/dreams met you wouldn't give two fucks about how connected you feel to other people unless it's about being a social animal and every benefit that comes from being social.

Western world lives life on easy mode and hence people have a shit load of time to indulge in self pity and base sentimentality and all the perversions that come along. Also when you aren't working hard towards something - everything external becomes important. Hedonism and nilism and all that - children of too much comfort.

You want to cure the western world of mental problems - just stop making life so easy.

I don't think most men become 'alphas' by following red pill and banging women and getting life in order. Actually that's bare minimum for being a man. Being alpha starts after this. And the path is full of pain and failures that ultimately make you the alpha.

[-] bakamoney 3 Points 3 months ago

How to you even find your calling?

I am in 20's and have no fucking idea.

[-] SKRedPill 8 Points 3 months ago

There is no ultimate life purpose as we know it. This is yet another BP oneitis idea - only this is applied to your purpose rather than a girl. Look around and see what you can contribute without reservations. When ideas start to come, you won't have time or energy for all of them - there are that many issues out there to solve.

And don't think the road is easy. If I make you work all day on your "passion", for most BP guys it will evaporate like water in the Atacama desert.

Just like there is no "The one woman" there is no "The one purpose". There are many problems and things you can do however - and you need not spin your work like spinning plates.

Most people just came up with ideas because something in their life sucked and they wanted to solve it. Others didn't have a choice, but accepted it and excelled at it.

[-] bakamoney 2 Points 3 months ago

I have never heard this said anywhere damn.

Any thing to read further on this?

[-] DL-45 3 Points 3 months ago

Hunter S Thompson wrote a letter about this

[-] [deleted] 3 months ago
[-] ahg1008 1 Point 3 months ago

If I could tell people how to find their calling - I'd be a billionaire. But by your 20's you should have a general idea.

[-] Harry_Wangs 2 Points 3 months ago

I agree to extent. Purpose and goals will allow you to focus on what's most important. Except, what you are proposing is not the reality of how purposeful men live.

I've lived periods of my life with extreme focus and dedication to one specific purpose and goal. It's not a lonely road and not necessarily a happy one. When you achieve this goal, you will want to enjoy and find some rest in your life. Most of the "purposeful" men in the annals of history still desired strong human connection. Julius Ceasar, Napoleon, etc... all got Oneitis. It would have been more useful for them to accept their irrational oneitis than for them to continue their overly macho stances, like what you're doing.

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FYI I am not originally from the Western World. I'm in my early 20s, busted my ass six figure job. Lift heavy 2-3X per week. Former semi-competitive athlete. Don't come from a rich family, infact make most money out of my whole family even though I'm the youngest... even more than my parents.

It was extremely difficult for me to achieve this. When I was the most driven and purposeful, I also became the most lonely. It's simply human nature.

[-] ahg1008 1 Point 3 months ago

I totally agree. I haven't reached a place in my life where I can be comfortable yet. Hence my point of view. Perhaps someday when I get to the comfortable place , I will let go of the over macho stance but for now this works for me so I'll stick with it.

[-] ahg1008 1 Point 3 months ago

But I think western world has taken the whole concept of feeling connected too far. There has to be some moderation in everything.

[-] anicebigrodforyou 10 Points 3 months ago

This is a great write up. Anything else on this sub about dealing with this?

I’ve been on a good roll lately but I find myself thinking about this one chick more than all the others and more than I should be. I know she likes me but I can see myself getting too concerned and wanting it to be perfect.

What do I do moving forward brothers? Thanks

[-] CasualPlay3r 3 Points 3 months ago

Well, i found that i been feeling oneitis too for a girl i recently fucked too. As Op says on the post, i conected better with her. Thing is i felt insecure about her past and such.

What got me out of it was abundance mentality PLUS buddhist texts citing the obvious; its all impermanent, she's not yours its just your turn.

Women will try to sabotage you into betaness and then get bored and fuck another man, never for a moment forget it. Just keep frame, keep fucking her good and continue having a good time.

[-] Crowstarz 3 Points 3 months ago

I was suffering from the same syndrome in my early 20s. The first thing i did was started MMA. i.e get into something that'll completely distract you from her. 2.Fuck more women to help with Curing Oneitis 3.Destroy obsession by reconnecting with your bros and family. 4.Start travelling.when i say travelling that doesn't means flyin off to thailand or some resort.explore your or neighbouring city. Go through history of your place. In my teen yrs i was a hardcore gamer, i'd say fck off to any1 when it was about playing mmo's. There was a dedication that i'm gonna play nd destroy the final boss of that fckng game. THAT IS THE TYPE OF DEDICATION REQUIRED TO KILL ONEITIS!

[-] SKRedPill 7 Points 3 months ago

Sex was made for passing genes down. Nature gave you sex to have kids, and bonding is needed if you want to keep the family up as long as it lasts for the sake of the kids. There's no escaping that. There was no such thing as casual sex before the 20th century. So your body will of course try to do the needful. It happened to Roosh, he hit saturation at one point. You will have to stay aware of what's happening instead of allowing your body to keep tricking you.

I came out of a marriage that nearly threatened to consume me up, and right now I could say that I'm in no mood to get married again. But my body can and will trick me again because the body is far more solid than thoughts. I will have to acknowledge this if it means I have to spot it when it happens. Improvement is a work in progress. Many times one has to be kicked more than once before the impact becomes permanent.

[-] Legrandmensonge 7 Points 3 months ago

If I read this post 4-5 months ago, I would say get abundance mentality, go fuck 10 other girls etc.

But now, I know that fighting with our human nature is harder and more complicated than we think.

I’am 40yo, I’ve been red pilled for more than 4 years, read all of the core TRP books, lift 4 times a week, manager in construction works and got 6 figure salary plus bonus for each project I finished. Best apartment in town with see view, car, bills etc in charge of the company. No financial issues so I can travel to Thailand tomorrow if I want to bang 10 girls in 3 days.

Since I found TRP, I spin always 3-4 plates successfully generally between 20-30 yo (Before TRP I was in serial LTR, I had never problem to find a girl). No drama, no commitment. Keeping frame is always easy since I digested TRP truths. (At least I was thinking like that).

Flash back to 6 months ago, I met a woman who is 30yo on tinder. We had sex on second date. We started seeing each other 2-3 times a week, movies and sex without stopping whole weekend. At the beginning I had no worries about not keeping the frame or betaization. I was the leader, we were seeing when I want and when I’m available.

The time I spent with her was much better that I spent with my other plates, so I prioritised her every time. 2 months later, I stopped seeing other plates. I was saying I am travelling or working so hard that I don’t have time to see each other.

3 months later, thinks started changing. I was feeling jealousy, I wanted to know where she is, what she is doing, with whom. We were seeing each other when she is available. I tired always keep frame except 2-3 times I shown my jealousy and disappointment. Sometimes ı don’t see her for one week, she had always excuses. Everytime when she says she is available, I was ready to see also. I never rejected her. I was aware that onitis is at the corner.

Last 2 months, I feel several times she is lying. When she says she is out of town to see her parents, my gut was saying that’s not true. She was just using her parents often to create free time, without any doubt or question of my side.

Last week she said her mother come to town next week, but she is not sure of the date because she couldn’t find flight ticket yet. It was not possible, I checked on skyscanner, there are 3 flights available every day. I just waited to see what can I do.

Finally and surprisingly her mother found a ticket for weekend. I said have fun with her. Next two days she rarely texted me on whatsapp, I miss you baby, I brought her to the beach today, we are having fun etc. She was lying and I was sure about that. (She was lying with details, they were at the beach but her mom doesn’t want to swim, maybe they will dinner at our favourite restaurant tonight etc.)

3th day, when she said me they are visiting the town, I asked her calmly to send me a selfie with her mom. I said I’m sure you took your beauty from her. She tried the changed the subject of conversation. I gently insisted. She said she is not beautiful on selfies, I said she is always beautiful for me on every pics. She tried to change the subject, I did not stop.

I never get this selfie with her mom, finally she said she knows why I insist. Then hamstring was at full force, she said her freedom is important for her, she doesn’t want to be owned by a man, she has to feel always free bla bla bla. Suddenly she tried the downgrade the relationship to justify her action.

She was not with her mom, maybe she was not even in town. She continued, 1.000 words of hamstring on whatsapp. I just read calmly, waited until she finished.

I knew that emotional reactions will not solve the situation. I was keeping the frame, she finally stopped writing. It was not easy for me but, I just wrote , I understand, it’s done. Than suddenly I ghosted her, blocked all contacts.

It’s been one week and I think about her every day, even when I’m with other girls. I don’t feel same emotions when I fuck someone else. Happy days are on my head even when I have fun with someone else. But I know I did what I have to do. I take whole responsibility of this situation.

I called one of my old plates this week, she came to my town to stay a week. I wrote others also, met a new young chick etc. I tried to take all the necessary action to get over this situation as soon as possible.

So from the first minute until the end, I was aware of the whole process thanks to red pill. But I couldn't stop. Sometimes I think difference between redpill aware man and an ordinary AFC is like difference between human and animals about death. Animals don’t know they will die one day, as humans, we are aware of death but we have nothing to do about that.

[-] Auxfite 5 Points 3 months ago

Oneitis destroyed NFL player Rueben Foster career. His Gf at the time accused him of domestic violence which later she dropped the case (they got back together) 7 months later he gets arrested again for DV and it looks like the cases won’t be dropped this time. (He’s finally became aware that she was toxic and ruining his life). Another team signed him but he will be likely facing jail time/ NFL year long suspension.

It’s no joke oneitis can ruin a man’s life. Thank God for the redpill and the age of information era. You can vet out girls by forums like this.

[-] Harry_Wangs 5 Points 3 months ago

Oneitis destroys many men, I honestly think the extreme examples are more rare.

Mostly, it is in subtle ways. Simply by focusing on the oneitis many men do not fulfill their potentials. Or perhaps they stick at some decent paying, dead-end job for the sake of his oneitis for the rest of his miserable life.

[-] bakamoney 4 Points 3 months ago

He went back to someone who threw a case on him?

Damn

[-] [deleted] 3 months ago
[-] tempolaca 2 Points 3 months ago

Thats not oneitis, that's his gf being a bitch, or him being an asshole.

Oneitis IS destoying my life. Oneitis is thinking about just this girl, trying to do stupid things to met her, emailing her even if all the TRP knowledge in the world says that you don't have to contact her, but you do it anyway.

[-] tempolaca 5 Points 3 months ago

God dammit this hits me hard. Here I was 6 months ago, slaying 1-2 women per month and also having a LTR that I liked, but not loved.

LTR suddenly left and I got into the worst oneitis I had in years for her. I'm thinking all this time I was not really alpha but a beta fuck, but this post might explain a lot.

I'm asking myself how can I get oneitis while fucking other girls? it's because this girl, was really, quite good. I don't have scarcity of regular women, but I do have scarcity of really good women. I think that's why the oneitis is so painful this time.

[-] tyronethejabrone 4 Points 3 months ago

Learn to appreciate girls for everything that they are, the way they interact with you, the things that make them unique, the things that make them just like all the others, everything.

Trying to remain detached so that you don’t feel a loss when she is gone is NOT the way to go.

Abundance mentality is a (surprise surprise) mentality gained through experience in the game. You will learn that there are girls that you will like a lot more than others. But really allowing yourself to like the girl and appreciating the time shared together makes it a lot easier to move on. If you’re having regrets about how things went, all you can do is to accept what happened and move on. It is what it is.

[-] krimpenrik 5 Points 3 months ago

Have same problem, have 2 plates, one which i really like but cant get closer to. This just attracts me more because you cant have it.. in the end I realised there is no point in getting closer to a girl that isn't totally into you and accept that it is just my turn.

[-] KewlThanks 4 Points 3 months ago

Even if you could, you'd get sick of her at some point after enough nuts. And want an Asian girl, or a blonde Taylor Swift type.

I mean I would be willing to forego all that for a loyal cute thing, but there is no such thing.

[-] Zech4riah 3 Points 3 months ago

When it comes to oneitis - one thing that skews this further is that most guys typing here would never admit having a oneitis or to be exact - feeling oneitis. Feeling like having oneitis is one step towards actual oneitis (oneitis = feeling like she is unicorn and acting like it). You can have oneitisy feelings (love etc -whatever you wanna call it) and when you have those feelings you should pay careful attention on to them that the feelings don't manifest themselves with oneitis/beta behaviour. In other words, keep it real, accept the fact that you may feel like having oneitis (it's ok to feel and connect with a girl) but pay attention and don't act the way that feeling tells you to do.

Mindset #3 - Acceptance Accept that you have oneitist and identify it as soon as possible. The more advanced you are on the Red Pill Alpha journey, the harder it is to admit that you are human and fell into oneitist. Fighting this will only make it worse. Accept that you have oneitist. Accept that you think she's special, but know it is time to move on.

This is a really important reminder:

*with negative behavior/traits, we do not need so much evidence. Very few instances of bad behavior = bad behavior, especially early on when she is on her best behavior.

[-] bakamoney 2 Points 3 months ago

A blue pill beta Bob, once rejected, could easily repeat the same blue pill fantasy with the next girl.

Bob here. Did exactly that.

[-] Wolveryn 2 Points 3 months ago

It happened to me earlier year also, it wasn’t til I realised how much of a top notch women she was and that I was keen to take it more seriously that she suddenly lost attraction... as soon as she had me, she didn’t want me.

God damn it she was sexy AF.

Took 2 months to even feel attraction to other women again... I couldn’t even get hard to good porn for a while there

[-] olimpicus 1 Point 3 months ago

can you give details on how did you fuck up?

I'm with a hot girl and fighting oneitis, sometimes i get too romantic but then i slap myself and tell her i don't care if it ends. Any detail of how oneitis affected you and your relation would be appreciated.

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Thanks in advance and cheers, you'll fuck even hotter ones now that you gained experience

[-] Wolveryn 2 Points 3 months ago

Well I’d say it was the beginning of the end when I sent flowers to her office...

That was when I was thinking about her all day, looking forward to seeing her again. I mean love is addictive AF, to go back I’d say I shouldn’t have rushed anything... at all, rather kept things natural and fun.

But I think it was going to end no matter what at some point in time

[-] olimpicus 1 Point 3 months ago

I agree... It would end sooner or later. I'm on the bitchy state of the woman.

I want to keep going but i suspect she is of the dark triad or BPS type. Fucking shit testing all day and flirting with other guy (whom i consider beta, she "just talks" but the guy is clearly interested and talks a lot with her alone, i'm not showing jealousy, keeping frame)

I had this girl on my job, a job i work some days at the week (i k ow, stupid move). I'm pissed off but i'm starting to let go. Thanks for your comment!

P.S: even if she cheats or if it ends i acted kinda good, kept the frame. So if it ends its better than if it ends without frame. I feel good about myself at least.

Bad english sorry

[-] oneutch 2 Points 3 months ago

Yesterday i had to see my oneitis kissing with a dude in a club... In my blue pill days I could have left the club to cry in my bed, but yesterday? I thanked that man (in my mind) and I kept on having fun, as if nothing.

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Obviously i'm a man and it hurts, but honestly I feel as if I have been saved from myself, especially since I am just in the way of improving myself/and internalized the redpill mentality..

[-] olimpicus 2 Points 3 months ago

Dude i needed this post. I'm in a weird situation. I have a GF, we have a kid, we don't fuck much. I met a very hot milf (39) who is married too. We have kind of a LTR since a year and a half. Everybody is saying she is fucking a guy from my job. She has become bitchy lately just 3 days ago and we haven't met since 5 days.

I know what wil happen and i'm bracing for impact. I have been fighting with oneitis for a while i think i can take this but it will hurt for sure.

Thanks for sharing

[-] Harry_Wangs 1 Point 3 months ago

This is a good approach. Accept that it hurts and move on. Better than Blue-Pilled days and better than trying to lie to yourself that you are just an emotionless, abundant robot.

[-] KewlThanks 2 Points 3 months ago

Just...dude they're all shit. Integrity is a male trait, uphold your deal or you and your tribe die. Honor and real virtue are male traits, and have to be forced onto women.

They can put up a great facade, but real shit will happen, or you can make it happen, and it'll come crumbling down.

The two X chromosomes are there, unless you're into traps or something. Have a surrogate kid or two and a nanny, it's game over out there unless she's a virgin when she meets you, even then, but that's about the only time to wife any girl.

[-] ArdAtak 1 Point 3 months ago

This means, the more women you've been with, the stronger oneitis can become

I agree. Got hit HARD by oneitis in the middle of a raging abundance phase. Didn't expect it and got completly blind-sided.

[-] Harry_Wangs 1 Point 3 months ago

I like how on TRP, every single poster, including myself, needs to preface everything by talking about how much abundance we have hahah.

I’m glad others are starting to recognize that abundance is helpful, but it’s not everything. As stoic as we would like to be, we are still human and still want deeper connection (even if it’s subconscious)

[-] [deleted] 1 Point 3 months ago

I get what you are saying completely.

But I sort of feel in simple terms, ayn rand's philosophy gets across the same idea.

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