Hey, I don't post on here but am a reader. Thought I should share a video I found on Youtube showing a married couple trying to save their marriage. Featuring Jordan Peterson who provides the couple advice.

Note - I respect and generally agree with Jordan Peterson on many issues however not in this instance, I disagree with the approach he takes, however, this is beside the point, the main focus is on the couple.

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Part 1

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6j-iRNd3Xkk&feature=youtu.be

Part 2

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o\_mR1pIbvoY&t=1s

Part 3

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kASYzKOjIYE&feature=youtu.be

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This video Is a good example of a marriage where the woman is not attracted to the man, and the man is trying to fix it. You can uncover a lot by what they say and by their body language and actions in response to phrases, this is made more interesting if you have basic red pill understanding.

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Part 1 - thoughts

- Couple married for 7 years

- Met in high school - Husband states they were high school best friends - Many of us know a large number of female - male friendships consist of a female needing attention, so she gets it from a male orbiter who has oneitis. This probably was the case here.

- Wife states they went their separate ways and did their "own thing" - Meaning she probably went and rode that carousel.

- Found each other on Facebook - When that wall came she remembers and finds her beta best friend from high school - he most probably still had feelings for her at this point.

- Asks her to go dinner - Ok, he definitely still had feelings for her.

- Wife says marriage turned into them being roommates - Maybe because your not actually attracted to him to begin with, but of course the husband does not help his case.

- Husband calls her best friend - Really man? No wonder she thinks of the marriage as being 'roommates'.

- Get into arguments

- Wife says she beats him down - Meaning shit tests and emotional manipulation.

- Husband says he feels underappreciated - As a man you have to provide that's your job, why do I have to say thanks?

- Woman displays fake sadness "Things have got to change, it makes me sad sorry" - Lets show them I'm trying.

- Woman has divorce papers printed out and man knows it - This is a sad situation to be honest. Man responds towards this by trying to work it out - which we know you cannot negotiate attraction. it's either there or it's not.

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Lastly, look at them sitting down at the end - when the camera zooms across their faces, notice the expressions. The wife looks calm , almost happy whereas the husband is visibly upset.

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Notice the way they are sitting, the wife has her hands strictly to her center whereas the husband, initially at least, has one hand on the side of the chair out towards his wife - perhaps to initiate holding hands - but this is declined by her keeping her hands at the center and locked, of course this explanation is not for sure - but is reasonable.

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Wife probably does want a divorce but is trying to work it out so she does not come across as the bad guy, and it is likely her only objective is just to remain friends so she wants to end or be on good terms. Interesting when she says;

"I don't want to be the stigma of going through divorce" also, "I know there is better out there, I just miss my best friend" , what does this mean?

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Part 2 - thoughts

The host (who admits was surprised by the divorce papers), asks the wife why she didn't sign them, she responds by saying there is "always that hope" - husband ever so slightly moves head in agreement, suggests he believes that too.

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When Jordan Peterson mentions them having the grounds of real friendship (a positive attribute he states) - The wife nods strongly and the husband too ever so slightly - this suggests that they agree with the claim.

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When Jordan Peterson mentions dates - Notice how the wife's face lights up and she looks at her husband - yay spend more money on me.

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When Jordan Peterson mentions distributing the duties in their life - Wife presses her lips - possibly suggests she does not like that idea.

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Peterson mentions "Don't agree to things you don't agree to" - In response to this statement the wife is nodding strongly - again this suggests she agrees with the statement, so is the husband but he is slightly nodding. Furthermore this is most probably a feature in their relationship suggested by her looking and saying 'uh-hum' at her husband and him saying "ah yeah" in a tone implying 'If only you knew' , and her responding by laughing.

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Peterson talks about agreeableness and that being too agreeable can cause resentment -

He states "you can tell if your doing that too much if you get resentful" - meaning the person being agreeable and not the other person involved.

It is interesting to see how both react in this instance - the wife raises her head and purses her lips nodding and did a slight head turn toward her husband's direction. The action suggests this is exactly how she is feeling. The husband also nods his head slightly and somewhat utters something under his breath. However this instance suggesting he understand what's been said.

This could mean that the wife heard the characteristics of an agreeable person and that it causes resentfulness - and heard or understood it as her husband causing resentfulness within her from his most likely agreeable behaviour.

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It could mean that the husband is being agreeable and because of this is very resentful of it - in her view at least.

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It could also mean she is agreeable and is very resentful of it.

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In any case given what has been said it is highly unlikely she is the agreeable person in the relationship considering she has already opened the avenue of divorce, therefore having the power over him.

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Part 3 - thoughts

I'll be looking at the whiteboard segment:

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Who should go first? Husband - "ladies first" - Such a gentleman lol

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Husband described as sweet and devoted - A recipe for a beta provider if you ask me.

Notice how she says "were my top four" and not 'are' - I may be going a little overboard but just an observation.

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Wife described as strong - I guess she is the dominant in the relationship.

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It is Pretty interesting both did four characteristics instead of one - maybe overcompensating?

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Lastly, the husband's words to his wife - "I love you, I miss you as my best friend" - "I want to do whatever it takes, to keep this" - "I just want my friend back" - followed by a little silence - wife scrapes an "I love you too" followed by an awkward chuckle. I am honestly lost for words by what I'm hearing.

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Final thoughts

I argue the main issue we see is a husband desperately trying to fix a marriage with a woman that is not attracted to him at all. He appeals to their friendship to win her over hoping it will create not only attraction or 'romance' (as the show states often) but an actual peaceable relationship which they had in the past, however, each time he performs a beta action such as that it turns her off and makes her resent him more; hence - the arguments - the beat downs and the divorce paper.

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The women could of had genuine attraction for this guy initially, this is unlikely however due to their past relationship in high school and how no sexual relationship grew out of it - on the other hand - the husband beforehand could of displayed alpha traits - possibly had lots of women or status - something that attracted her to him at the time they met on Facebook - but then lost when he fell back into beta traits and oneitis - put into overdrive in their marriage. However what is more likely is she hit the wall needed to find a provider or 'husband material' finds her 'best friend' or vice versa on Facebook- bingo! However beta oneitis behaviour makes her resent him, she can't take it. This is consistent with many other examples displayed on here and in other places as well it relates to red pill theory which strives to look at male-female social dynamics realistically.

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It's a sad situation, the husband is basically friend-zoning himself in his own marriage hoping it will save it, in response to a woman that is dominant and pressuring him with divorce papers. This is why knowledge such as red pill is so essential in these times. Sadly, Peterson's advice will not help as it involves negotiation, which will be hard if the wife doesn't want to or even respect the person . He also states that to re-establish romance initially you have to get physical to rekindle the relationship, however you cannot get attraction or desire this way.

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Update

Some more thoughts on the 1st part.

Wife says - "I know there is better out there, I just miss my best friend" - Could this mean she thinks there are better men out there compared to her husband? If so this is very manipulative, and suggests that she does not desire her husband as a partner (sexual) but as a friend (non-sexual).

She misses her best friend - What about your best friend do you miss?

The husband says "she was my best friend, we did everything together - we used to go camping - motorcycle rides ." - the word '**was '**signifies they are not on friendly terms or at least best friends.

Were activities like these the basis of their friendship? The wife says "we used to go on love dates and now its like we don't do anything together " - when analysing the other parts its evident the wife is very interested in bringing back going on dates. For example - in part 3 she says in response to the romantic absence impacting them, "If we start planning dates, you know, it will all just come back"

Husband also states they have different expectations of what they want from each other - "not even on the same page, or even in the same book sometimes so to speak"

It is a possibility that an or the main expectation of the wife is dates /going out and the main reason or a reason she got married to him in the first place this further evidenced by their friendship seemly spent doing activities - so she has come to expect it.

The husband most probably did these dates and other activities, hoping to receive respect, affection and desire - this is his expectation formed by lack of understanding of female nature- and possibly when not receiving it - stopped them - and now is met with backlash and resentment, further exacerbated by beta behaviour.

Going back to the original phrase "I know there is better out there, I just miss my best friend" - It is possible that the wife wants to keep the marriage alive for the friendship aspect which she has come to expect is dates, which most likely involves money spent on her. It is possible she did not have an attraction for her husband going into marriage but an attraction for what her husband can do for her so to speak - and things such as divorce papers are devices to bring him back into line. It is also likely that she does not have much dating options outside her marriage so opts to stay in the marriage but only on her terms.

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Of course this is not exact more evidence would be needed but is considered speculation.

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