I am a shapeshifter. Not the reptilian kind, but the kind where my body type never stays in one place. One year I'll be fat, the next I'll be skinny, the next I'm ripped and the year after that I'll be chubby again, only to get ripped again a year later. While my weight has never fluctuated outside of the 150-230 range, when I get heavier my face changes dramatically, it distorts. I gain lots of fat in my face. I don't get double chins, but my cheeks, neck, and forehead will get huge, obscuring my bone structure and jawline, and giving me this bizarre looking Elmer Fudd moonface. I look WAY different when I'm overweight, to the point where even a 25lb difference could make me pass as a different person. But most importantly I get ugly as FUCK. I'm the only guy I know who can go from an 8 to a 3 in one year.

As my body type has drifted back and forth periodically, I've gotten familiar with all of the different shades of female attention, from brutal creep shaming to being cold approached and groped by HB9's. I have done nothing to warrant either one, other than appear a certain way. I am a firm believer in looks theory.
In 8th/9th grade I lost 80lbs, and suddenly within the span of 6 months girls started being nice to me. Really nice. Giving me loads of attention and going out of their way to get mine. My first relationship at 15 was surreal, and still, a decade later it feels like it never fully happened, like it was in a dream or something, because she was insanely hot, and the type of person who would've spat in my face if I'd talked to her a year earlier.There was a dramatic shift in the way women acted around me - they were actually letting their guard down - and I realized that for the first 14 years of my life they had been using preemptive verbal defense tactics to keep me at arms' length, so that I wouldn't "get any ideas". In a nutshell: women are creeped out by ugly men, and they think if they're kind to us we're gonna try to fuck them. What's funny is that 99.99% of the time, not only are you completely and obviously uninterested in them, but the women employing these tactics will be lowly/older gals who KNOW you wouldn't hit on them in a million years: checkout clerks, receptionists, food service employees, etc. They know they're not even the faintest blip on your radar, but still, they can't help but act the way they act - it's in their DNA to be repulsed by weak specimens.

One very subtle but crafty way they do this is through the use of fraternal language. They'll refer to others using flowery words, but refer to you using the type of words that your bros would use.

Imagine: you're in line at Circle K. The guy in front of you is a tall, wiry, blue-collar twentysomething with a jawline, dirty calloused hands and a Carhartt jacket. He approaches the counter and asks for a pack of cigarettes. The cashier, a late-30's, frumpy post-wall woman with bad teeth and painted-on eyebrows, smiles at him and goes "Sure thing darlin'!" as she eagerly grabs his Camels. "Your total's $7.98 sweetheart, anything else I can get for ya?" she asks chipperly. He grunts, shakes his head and pays for his stoges.

"NEXT!" she calls out, eyeing you with contempt. You approach the counter and ask for a pack of cigarettes. "One second, man", she croaks as she trudges over to the back wall, digging out your 27's with as little energy as possible, before plunking them down on the counter. "$8.25 dude", she deadpans. You hand her a $10, she rolls her eyes and sighs as she begins counting your change. She thrusts the $1.75 at you and drops it in your hand from a height just high enough that her hand won't run the risk of touching yours. You say "thanks" meekly and walk out, feeling vaguely insulted but unable to articulate why.

Congrats, you just got negged by an old hag. In the seconds leading up to your interaction with her, she rated you in her head and assigned you the status "undesirable". She then called you "man" and "dude" as a means of desexualizing herself by taking on a fraternal stance, de-escalating the pervy fucked up thoughts that she knew were probably going through your head. It's like when a lesbian tapes her tits down and wears a wifebeater - the point isn't to act like a man, it's to make men stop viewing her in a sexual light and leave her alone. Straight women do the same thing, only selectively and through words.
Bottom line: it doesn't matter that she's gross. What matters is that YOU'RE gross. Because when a man is unattractive, it automatically, in the minds of all women everywhere, means he's desperate enough to run game on toothless gas station employees. And that scenario is one she must avoid at all costs, for in her mind, she is a brave beautiful womyn who just hasn't found her Chad yet.

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