My Hypothetical Story:

  • Condom breaks mid drunk intercourse, ejaculated inside vagina.
  • Girl is crazy and WANTS to have a baby. Girl refuses to take plan B.
  • Being cautious, I pay a female friend to get me a plan B pill because they don't sell to guys without the girl being present. Now I have a Plan B pill on hand.
  • I somehow convince crazy girl (By threatening that I will never talk to her or fuck her again if she doesn't) to come with me to the pharmacy to get a Plan B pill and take it.
  • I buy both of us a can of Minute Maid Orange Juice while we wait for the pharmacist to process the drug.
  • Girl takes the plan B Pill. (or pretends to?)
  • We continue hanging out, during this time I am keeping things cool/casual and not trying to act like I'm rushing her to take it so I can leave. She is still drunk and drinking straight Vodka out of the bottle and chasing with the orange juice.
  • She wants to stop at the store to buy smokes. We park, she goes in by herself.
  • Me, being skeptical of this crazy bitch. I decide to drop the Plan B pill that I had on hand into her can of orange juice to give her a double dose.
  • We continue hanging out and I see her taking sips from the can. Not sure how well the pill dissolved (hopefully well and that she took most of it).
  • After about 45 minutes or so of hanging out I eventually take her back to her apartment.
  • I tell her I am dropping her off, because I got to go home and study.
  • She says that we should just hang out for 10 more minutes. I politely decline her offer.
  • Crazy bitch gets mad then tells me that she didn't swallow the pill, she put it behind her teeth and when I was not looking she took it out and put it in her purse. I'll never forget the psycho look on her face thinking "she won" during this verbal exchange.
  • I tell her I am never gonna talk to her ever again and I resist the urge to tell her that I knew she would do that so I planted the pill in her can (just in case she forces her self to throw up - you never know). She replies that she wants to have a baby and that I don't have to be apart of it and she wont contact me.
  • I tell her shes fucked in the head and I take off. I immediately block her on Facebook.
  • Thank God I took the extra precaution to drop the pill into her can. However, I can't be sure how effective it was dissolved and how much she drank/how much was left on the bottom of the can.
  • I did everything I possibly could have done to mend the situation for me. Pray to God she does not get pregnant.
  • Not sure what else could be hypothetically done, other than hypothetically kill her.

Reminder:

  1. Don't fuck crazy (no matter how horny you are)
  2. Don't trust crazy (EVER)
  3. Have a Plan B, C, and if possible, an actual Plan B.

I have encountered crazy before, but NEVER this crazy.

EDIT: She messaged me on Snapchat later and said: 

Her: "Okay I lied I did take the pill I'm sorry"
Me: How do I know ur not lying right now?
Her: "I'm really sorry"
Me: Tell me the truth
Her: "I am telling the truth"
Her: "I took the pill I'm sorry <my name>"
Me: How do I know ur not lying right now?
Her: "I know I'm sorry I'm a horrible person for saying that"
Me: I don't know if I can believe you after that

I still don't trust this bitch.