Women can not be hit on without telling the world. You may want to consider Mike Pence's approach to being around women alone. This isn't a 'pound me too' post. It's more protecting your reputation. However, it's related.
This is mostly aimed at younger men. High school or college, or men who are new to the work force and life. Maybe you're away from home found a church to go to; if you've always attended church functions with your family then this is for you. Veterans on here won't be surprised, but if you can find value in this then great. Anyway enough foreplay.
I'm going to share two stories from my job, and then I'll go over the lessons taken from them.
There is a woman at my job. We'll call her Janice...because why not. She's pretty attractive. She's late 30s but aged incredibly well, with a cute face, and decent body. Most men would find her attractive. She's not my type and she's got an attitude that I wouldn't tolerate, but other men like her. Anyways I was talking to a coworker about something (I don't remember) when Janice came over and started a conversation with me. Here's a paraphrasing of how it went. As you imagine this scenario imagine me as portrayed by Michael B. Jordan.
Janice: Hey, do you know So-and-So from other other location?
Janice: Well i went over there for something and he was totally hitting on me
Janice: It was just weird. Like he know's I'm with my boyfriend. Why would he hit on me?
Me: I don't know?
Janice: Like he was telling me that he misses me working there and he wants to come visit me and how much he likes talking to me. Was was also saying we should hang out sometime and I was like well I don't think...
Me in my head: Is she autistic? I don't know this guy. I don't care about this guy. Damn.
Janice: that my boyfriend would like that. Like it's just weird he would say that.
Me; yeah that's crazy. Anyways time to hit the ol' dusty trail.
As I escaped she continued the story with the coworker whom I was talking with. I pondered about why she insisted on talking my ear off about someone I don't know. And why a girl as attractive as her was making such a big deal out of it. The more I thought about it, the more I realized it's because she wanted people to know that she was hit on.
Imagine you're at starbucks on vacation someone far from home and some girl comes up and starts telling you how attractive you are and asking you out. You tell her that you're flying home tonight, but definitely enjoyed the compliments. You'd probably feel pretty good about yourself right? Maybe you'll tell a friend or two. But not women, they don't feel good about it unless everyone knows they were hit on. Hell look at all the subs on reddit dedicated to mocking men for hitting on women. Some of it is funny and definitely worth posting (I saw a Niceguys post where a woman told a man she wasn't interested, and he immediately call her the n-word. Made me laugh), but most of the time it's just women being narcissistic. Reddit is better than social media. Instagram, facebook, snapchat, I've seen more than a few screenshots of conversations with men where women for some reason need to publicly put these men on blast because they were a little out of line. It's because these women want all their friends and followers to see them being flirted with.
Same thing with Janice. Was that guy out of line hitting on her even though he knew she had a man? Yes, I think so. Even if I 100% believe her version of the story and that he actually said all those things nothing was really that bad. A little much, but nothing that bad. But she couldn't resist telling me and whoever else all about it. Sad.
Next is a story about yours truly and a woman named carol. Now I was chatting with a newer coworker. She was telling me about one area of our job site, and how frustrated some of the people get there because everyone makes a mess there.
Me: Oh yeah, I've heard Melanie and Carol complain more than once. I try to make sure anything I put there goes in it's proper place. It's not hard. People do that all over. They just throw things wherever is easiest and don't think about the next person having to clean it up. It sucks.
Coworker: Yeah, Carol said that you're good about not making a mess. Even if you do like to stare at her ass.
At this point my jaw fell open. I had not response. I weakly tried to deny it, but my worker merely said "uh huh" clearly not believing me.
About me and Carol. I've been at my job about 5 years, and Carol has been there a little longer than that. We've talked maybe 10 times in these years. And it's almost always been work related (she had a boyfriend there who started the same time I did. I didn't know about their relationship until after their 3rd anniversary). My point is that she and I never talk.
Now about Carol's looks. She's decently attractive I guess. However, she is 100% not at all my type. I have a very particular type that I am attracted to, and very seldom do I stray from this. She doesn't fit the bill at all. I almost wanted to laugh at the allegation because any of my friends who know what I go for would know that she's full of shit. It's not that she's ugly, it's me. Lastly I should note that Carol is around 50 years old. Again she looks really healthy for her age, but that makes her old enough to be my mom. I don't mind the occasional cougar hunt, but that's too much.
Now after being confused and frustrated about this situation I realized some important things and I thought I'd share them here for you lads who may not know.
Once again, this is for those of you who are new to being around women. Be wary of what you say, how you say it, etc. because it will be shared with everyone else. Women have no compassion. Do your best to avoid being caught off guard.
Two women at my job got hit on (or thought they did) and decided to share it with several workers there. It's pretty messed up, but that's what they do. Be safe around women and don't hit on someone if you're not prepared for her to run and tell the world. Avoid this behavior at work, school, church, social events, etc.