An old plate of mine hit me up a few weeks ago to hang out. In her text she made it clear that she likes me, but kinda feels guilty to hang out, because she had a boyfriend. I replied with “cool, it doesn’t change anything”. She was happy and promised to hit me up soon to hang out.

Of course she didn’t because women are so passive, so I initiated the meeting.

I wanted to check out an open mic stand-up comedy event, and she’s into stand-up comedy herself, so I thought that would be a perfect pretense. Keep in mind that at that time I still wasn’t sure if I wanted to make a move on a taken girl (I’ve never done that before).

After the event I invited her to my place. I cooked a dinner for us (TRP will probably hate me for it, but I was hungry, she was hungry too and was my guest) and then tried making a move on her.

Her: What are you doing?! I told you I’m not single, I have a boyfriend!

Me: I used to have a hamster.

Her: ??? What?

Me: Things that don’t matter in this conversation.

Her, making a “what a fucking asshole” face: Why do guys want always something from me, why we can’t be just friends?

Me: Sure, we can be friends… with benefits.

Her: I mean I like you, but I would feel bad for cheating on my boyfriend.

During this conversation I expected her to get up and leave at any time. I was actually surprised when she said she liked me, after being so clearly upset a few seconds before. I guess I held my frame correctly.

What happened next surprised me even more: She started complaining about her boyfriend. How he’s so clingy and wants to see her every day. How she wants to start her own business and he’s just a distraction. How he’s okay, but she doesn’t return the same feelings. How she just wants to focus on herself and seeing a guy once a week would be the best for her. She told me she would probably break up with him by Christmas.

Then she told me he was really quick to say the “L-word” ("I love you") and that he is the THIRD guy who has told her that this year.

Third.

She’s a 7 at best, usually a 6.

This is nothing new, but this date helped me internalize basic TRP lessons:

  • Women practice abundance by default
  • Clinginess is cringey
  • Too many guys are willing to pour their hearts to women too early
  • A 6 has an ego of a 10
  • AWALT

We didn’t end up fucking. She had to go back to her boyfriend, because she promised to. However she hesitated a lot to leave. She said that with guilt in her voice, she hugged me goodbye twice. I probably could have fucked her in the retrospect.

Lesson learnt.