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- Hide Preview | 25 Comments | submitted 5 months ago by SavingMasculinity [Post Locked]

You create what you think about

What we keep telling ourselves in our self talk, what we want, what we feel, and what we are, in the form of mental images, create what we experience in life. One of the keys to success is to accept as a habit the fact that you can control your thoughts. You can control and eliminate negative emotions, negative thoughts, and create thoughts that bring you what you do want in your life.

Stop making excuses!

Don’t look for excuses. Don’t blame the situation on women, not being rich, tall, etc. Only when you stop making excuses can you have rock solid inner game.

Before Getting Started... For 3 days, make an inventory of all the thoughts that pop up when seeing a girl you're attracted to. Literally mark down on a sheet of paper or in a notebook, a mark for each negative self talk. These can be things you said out loud or to yourself. Do that for at least three days. Total it up, and get your percentages of positive-positive self talk, positive-negative self talk, and negative self talk.

Types of Self Talk

There are 4 levels of self talk:

Level 1: The level of negative acceptance, is when you simply say, “Oh, I can’t do that. I can’t. I’m not able to do that. I won’t do that. I don’t know how to do that. I can’t.”

Level 2: Level of recognition and need to change. “Well, I should approach that girl. I need to get laid.” You see, that is a negative/ positive, “I should approach her.” We’re getting towards the right direction, but we are not there yet.

Level 3: Level of decision to change. "I am no longer going to pussy out. I never will wuss out on an approach ever again."

Level 4: "I am confident around women. I am a guy attractive women want to have sex with." “I am” is the better version of you.

Eliminating Negative thoughts

Stomp the ANTS. "ANTS" stand for Automatic-Negative-Thoughts. As you’ll see from your inventory most people have about 80 percent negative thoughts and 20 percent positive ones. What we need to do is disrupt these negative thoughts and turn them into positive thoughts. Come up with a way to physically disrupt the negative thoughts, like snapping a rubber band on wrist, pinching self, snapping fingers, etc... Then come up with a default “replacement thought”. Like “Attractive women wanna sleep with me.”

Adopting an Attitude of Unrelenting Positiveness

The baseline of inner game is an overall attitude of optimism and positiveness. There have been literally hundreds of studies on the benefit of a positive attitude. These include longer lifespan, less health problems, higher incomes, etc... Most importantly a positive attitude is MARKEDLY more attractive to women than a negative one. Positiveness is the mental equivalent of having big muscles.

Putting the RELENTLESS in Positiveness

“Nothing is a big deal. Nothing is a problem. Everything ALWAYS works out for me in the end.” This one piece of advice will take you further with women than almost any other piece of advice out there. You must remain positive in the face of any problem or situation that happens with a woman. Your positiveness must be relentless.

3 Magic Questions for staying positive

1. Whats good about this situation/person, etc? 2. What can I learn from this? 3. What is the BEST use of my time here?

Talking Back to your inner voice

Sometimes you will have a negative voice or physical impulse when it comes to approaching women that seems more powerful than you can overcome. The key to dealing with these thoughts is to argue with them, instead of accepting them as true. Remember YOU create your own unconscious thoughts! They are not inherently true and they do not create you!!! Practice talking back when you feel a negative thought or your body telling you, you CAN’T do something.

Putting it all together

Use this knowledge wisely and you will be rewarded for it. From experience, I have been a pretty negative person in past. I used to struggle with depression, but low and behold lifting and eating healthy helped. And I learned firsthand how being positive can work in your favor. Even when nothing seems to be going your way. Wallowing in self pity is no good. And jealousy over other people...other does that help you? If anything, it should motivate you. So that guy gets laid a lot and you don't? That person makes a lot of money and you don't? Ok, then do something about it. A positive mindset is needed to really make change, otherwise, giving up and throwing in the towel is on the table.

You must not give up. You must be positive and keep fighting the good fight. You are responsible for your own happiness.

If you liked this post, I did do a part I of this series about goal setting, found in my submission history. Stay tuned for the third part within the coming week. I will go over Beliefs, which ties into Relentless Positiveness.

Alright, I'm out!

[-] chasevalentino 28 Points 5 months ago

At the end of the day every person's goal in life is to be happy and being positive gets you closer to that than any other single thing in life. So many things will manifest themselves from you being positive in the first place.

I think all red pillers should take this on board before looking at anything else. Lots of stuff on the redpill I've found has the ability to make men sour at the world which I think defeats the purpose of this community. Let's all be positive and live a life worth living. All the rest like women, career, ambitions will fall into place with your positive thinking

[-] Venny_1 4 Points 5 months ago

...every person's goal in life is to be happy...

I used to think that way; now I'm of the mind that seeking truth and improving yourself are more ultimate goals than happiness. Happiness and calmness are a byproduct of the aforementioned.

[-] metallica11 14 Points 5 months ago

I fail to understand why there is so much hatred and vitreol towards the red pill site (the typical "misogynist" neckbeard losers comments"), when I come here and find thought out well written posts like this which state the issue, break down the problem, and devise a well thought out solution to correct it. alot of this stuff doesnt only apply to women as well.


I feel like from the outside, red pill is communicated like "grbrbbrbbr WOMEN grbbbgbg I HATE THEM AND grbrr TAKE AWAY ALL THEIR RIGHTS grbbrggrb RAPE IS OK grbbrggrb WOMEN SHOULD ONLY EARN LESS THAN MEN".


i mean, god, I Come here for self help that isnt even related to women. and it works.

[-] Zech4riah 1 Point 5 months ago

I fail to understand why there is so much hatred and vitreol towards the red pill site (the typical "misogynist" neckbeard losers comments")

Because notable portion of the guys visiting here actually are misogynistic neckbeards or aggressive alpha males internet warriors.

Just take a look around and you will notice how sincere and/or unaware commenters get attacked in regular basis even by ECs (mostly to vent out some frustration).

[-] mvn_clean 1 Point 5 months ago

Of course, everything is relative, but I think one of the reasons is because people love to cherry pick and generalize to build rapport for their own personal agendas. In this case, if one post in this whole subreddit/community comes off as slightly insulting or misogynistic to them, they think it automatically gives them the right to voice their opinion about the whole community. Just like you, the majority of the posts that I read here have been a huge help towards my journey of self improvement, both mentally and physically. However, I can understand why another person might have that negative perspective, because they may be closed-minded and blue pilled about how the world works, just as I once was too. With time, of course, I changed my viewpoints. Some people just like to talk, and never read and listen. Understanding an opponent's viewpoints and how why they have them can be invaluable to convincing them to change. So a person's inability to consider other viewpoints is actually a huge weakness and fault, in a sense.

[-] [deleted] 5 months ago
[-] SavingMasculinity 1 Point 5 months ago

Thank you. I agree with you. I have learned to simply accept the fact that places like this will NEVER be accepted. And thats ok. I know who I am. And I know I don't hate women. I love women, I love being around them. I understand many women are absolute nightmares to be around, and thats fine. You're right, this stuff doesn't just apply to women. This applies to many aspects of your life. Women are just a part of many facets.

People are simply too stubborn nowadays, and too politically correct. I don't belief in sugar coating the truth however. Women aren't just going to come walking through the door, and money isn't either. You have to work to maker change and having a positive mindset is one of the first steps after you know what you want.

[-] IWillBecauseIcan98 5 Points 5 months ago

This post feels refreshing,kudos to you mate!

[-] SavingMasculinity 1 Point 5 months ago

Much appreciated! I like to try to do posts that aren't done often, if at all.

[-] johnpayne10 3 Points 5 months ago

You are your thoughts. Also... Mindset is 80% of success.

[-] SavingMasculinity 1 Point 5 months ago

Your thoughts can make or break a man.

[-] Selentest 3 Points 5 months ago

That's why anyone, who calls himself an incel, rarely succeeds. It's self-fulfilling prophecy.

[-] SavingMasculinity 2 Points 5 months ago

Exactly. You will never change unless you want to change. Identifying as an incel, even if true, should take a step back and figure out what needs to change. Because it's not only about women, it's them too, even if they are below average looking.

[-] Viralimpulse 2 Points 5 months ago

Question for op. Has anyone actually managed to pull this off? I see posts like this all the time calling for saintly levels of positivity but is it even realistic? I have never met someone that is able to pull this off even when they are extremely successful with women.

Do you think maybe it has nothing to do with the positivity but more so the ability to be comfortable?

[-] SavingMasculinity 5 Points 5 months ago

I can only speak from my personal experience. It works for me. Much better than that negative incel "blackpill" bullshit would. It's no good to be poor me all the time.

[-] Viralimpulse 2 Points 5 months ago

The poor me mindset is a way to cope. If we didnt have it. People would seriously suicide more. I mean look at all the post wall women. They use poor me mentality and no one is telling them to stop.

[-] xjx547 1 Point 5 months ago

I feel like it's OK to draw the line and be negative at things that are genuinely fucked. Your dog died, your dad is in the hospital, your leg got blown off, etc. But the first world shit like your girlfriend broke up with you, someone stole some small thing, your job sucks, the "system" is oppressing you– that's not OK to whine about unless you have a vagina. I see it so much on Reddit and my generation in general (millennial). It's a disease.

[-] mori_forthestreamer 2 Points 5 months ago

The ANTS thing worked for my anxiety, insomnia and depression. It's a cognitive behavioral therapy method I found online.

[-] Viralimpulse 2 Points 5 months ago


do you have a link to this method or did you use the one from OP? willing to dig deeper if this is actually legit.

[-] hinge 1 Point 5 months ago

It's a heavy ball you need to start pushing. Starting out every little thing can be interpreted by your sub conscious as a negative, but really it's just a habit you've formed. It takes time and patience to make it out the other side. Do you take rejection as - "she doesn't like me, I must be worthless." Someone with a positive outlook might think, "I'm glad she rejected me up front so we didn't waste each other's time." Those two examples had the same thing happen with two different interpretations. It's not easy, you can do it.

[-] sealift 2 Points 5 months ago

It's liberating AF once you realize you have the choice to make the cup half full or half empty. "Success does not lead to happiness, instead happiness leads to success."

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