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- Hide Preview | 24 Comments | submitted 3 months ago by justarandomguy15 [Post Locked]

Hey guys, this is my first post on this subreddit, and I know that it may not be perfect, but it's basically the gathering of a few comments I left on some questions on texting on asktrp which were quite appreciated by the OPs and other men. I figured I'd make a post about it and hear your advice in case one point doesn't make sense.


I’ve been seeing a lot of posts on asktrp lately enquiring about texting. The questions varied in shape and content. Some asked when to text the girl after getting her contact, others wondered if they had passed their shittests without sounding autistic. Some go as far as questioning whether using emojies is beta or alpha and which emojis to use. I have helped some, and my help was appreciated, but I was asked more often than not to elaborate a little on the tips I’m giving in the comments. Because I’m restricted by time, I usually don’t give the full the picture. So here’s a post me elaborating on my tips and explaining the good old “Text Game” a card that should be up every man’s sleeve.

A brief contextualization

To start off, when did we actually start using texts as means of communication? I’m not talking about some guy wrapping love letters around the legs of pigeons and sending them off across the country to his beloved. I’m talking about a guy actually grabbing his communication device and sending a text to a girl.

Texting hasn’t been a thing until the invention of the cellular phone. The latter reached a peak during the ending of the 1990s and the beginning of the 2000s. Do you remember those phones your parents used when you were a kid to send “Happy birthday” messages to your relatives? For the old schoolers in here, do you guys remember those phones with 9 keyboard buttons and each button containing 3 letters? You had to press number 4 twice, wait a little, and then press it thrice to write a simple “Hi”.

My point is, texting was extremely difficult. You can’t just text someone back in those days. You had to put the time and efforts. And not only that, you were also paying by character. So it was also costly. This explains why people kept their texts short and most importantly, stuck to the logistics after getting the girl’s number.

Now, fast forward a dozen of years and kids are texting their parents on Messenger and WhatsApp asking them to come and pick them up. Unlike the old times, texting is not expensive and is not difficult anymore. Texting has become means of communication just like speaking to each other, the only difference is that it’s done virtually through smartphones.

Let me elaborate a little on this. The coup d’état in Turkey on July 16, 2016 was organized on WhatsApp. The leader of the “rebellion” legit created a WhatsApp group with the army officials and declared that he will be making official statements through this medium. You may argue, “Yeah, sure, that’s why the coup failed in the first place”, but that’s not the point here. The point is that texting has become so easy, cheap and useful that it’s become so practical beyond measure. To the point that army officials are using it to organize coups. Look up the casualties caused by that coup in Turkey and you’ll understand what I’m talking about.

With that being said, let us proceed to the actual text game.

How to text a girl

If you ask a redpilled man on advice on texting, they’d most likely tell you, “Texting is only for logistics and nothing else,” which is partly true, but used to be the absolute truth back in the old times.

After experimenting with texting on my TRP journey, I came to the conclusion that texting is a really powerful tool that you can use to seduce a girl with. Here’s what I mean.

First of all, you should always bear in mind that you are texting to actually get to meet the girl. No matter what the context of the conversation is, you should always close the conversations with both of you agreeing on where and when to meet. This goes without saying. You can’t date a girl through text, that couldn’t get more beta. If you’re TRP-aware, texting should be used as a tool of building rapport, which is my second point.

After you meet the girl, you need to GAUGE HOW MUCH SHE WOULD LIKE TO BUILD RAPPORT over text. And it’s different with every girl. Some girls are totally okay with having short conversations over text with you before meeting about why their cats are depressed or why they failed the algebra test last week or whatever. Because you’re living in 2018 and not the 1990s, you should use text as it’s used nowadays, for actual communication. If you only stick to logistics you’d end up sounding autistic for some girls.

So the first thing to do after you get a girl’s number is to build rapport with her. The building of the rapport can literally be anything, but what I recommend is to casually mention something that happened between the both of you, something only the both of you know about, when you met and got her number. This will remind her on an unconscious level that SHE DOES KNOW you in real life. From here, you can go on for a few more texts discussing bullshit and then close with you guys agreeing on where to meet.

Some guys would recommend that you text the girl 6 times building rapport before starting discussing logistics, others maybe less or more, but again, it really depends on the girl, which leads me to the next point.

MIRROR HER GAME. Meaning, if the girl is replying to you in multiple/long texts, then reply in equally long or shorter texts. This also tells you something about the girl: SHE’S OKAY HAVING FUN TEXTING. She won’t regard you as beta if you keep on discussing some bullshit with her over text. Especially if you do it right (more on this later).

But if she’s keeping it short and sweet and not replying as enthusiastic as you do, then you realize that the building rapport phase is over and you should start discussing logistics right away. I’ve had a lot of cases with both types of girls.

So here’s a timeline of how your text game should go at this point:Build rapport ==> Gauge ==> Close by agreeing on a date

“But, justarandomguy15, how do I actually get to ask the girl out?” the actual closing. Remember that you’re absorbing her in your world. She’s a passive being and she’s only there to enjoy joining your busy and wonderful world. There was a symbolic scene ( in a movie called The Tourist in which Angelina Jolie is teaching Johnny Depp how to ask her for dinner (skip to 2:41).

“Women hate questions”.

“Too demanding”.

She should have also said, “WOMEN LOVE JOINING YOUR FUN LIFE”.

So when you’re about to close, you should let her know that you’re doing something special on Thursday and if she cared to join? You shouldn’t come across as if you’re ordering her telling her what to do and shit. I’ve seen a post on TRP legit advises guys to tell girls shit like, “Ey, I’m having a burger later at McDonald’s, be there by 13:00”.

Unless you’re Brad Pitt or the next fucking Bill Gates, she won’t have a reason to join you. But being a sweet gentleman giving her a chance to join your world could be luring enough for her to accept.

What kind of activities you should be asking her out for? A-N-Y-T-H-I-N-G, but again, we recommend a beer. I usually disguise this under, “Ah, I’m finishing work at 6pm on Thursday and all a man can use is a beer after such long day, wanna join?” or “This week’s been pretty hectic for me and feeling like grabbing a beer this weekend, are you free Saturday 7pm? I know this bar with cool sangria”.

Remember, women are all about plausible deniability. You should always contextualize the whole thing as “hanging out as friends”.

Name the place and name the time specifically, don’t give estimations like “Sometime next week…etc etc”. Just let her know when you exactly can see her and wait for her response.

From here on, she would either tell you that it’s okay she can make it or unfortunately she’s busy (ffs they’re humans as well, sometimes they legit don’t have time) and you know that she’s still interested if she says something along the lines of,” What about some other time! I’m free on Friday and Saturday!” if she doesn’t say anything, next the bitch. That’s what I usually do. You gave her a chance, she declined it, she’s not worth your time. Next.

So that should be your basic plan. Building rapport, gauging her texting receptiblity and closing with a date.

Now, a few more points.

  1. Text a girl whenever the FUCK you feel like. Some guys would advise that you text her while the iron is still hot. Others would tell you to wait for a few hours just to give the impression that you’re a busy bastard who doesn’t have time for her, and guess what? Both are right. What I recommend is that you try and judge how much she is into you and whether she is from close/ditanced circle. If the attraction is at a peak and she is from your university or a social club you go to, text her right away. Maybe after you get home or something. If she’s KINDA into you, if you've met her on the street and only know her name and how big her boobs are, then wait for a few hours just to let her know that your life is not rotating around her.
  2. If she’s taking 2 hours to reply, take 1 hour to reply back. Always wait half the time she’s taking to reply, and if you’re really a busy guy and really can’t reply unless after a few hours, then it’s always good for you. Never invest in the text game more than the girl is. If she’s distanced, be more distanced and discuss logistics. If she’s having fun and replying right away, then have fun and reply right away. the point is, NEVER INVEST MORE THAN THE GIRL IS INVESTED.
  3. Be fun and flirtatious. This is maybe the number one rule. You’re alpha, sure, you’re dominant, decisive and have strong conviction in whatever the fuck you do, but you’re also a lot of fun to be around and a hilarious bastard. Make fun of her. Tease her, make jokes over text. Make fun of what happened between the both of you…etc etc. Like if you cold approach a girl and she gave you her number, be like “Are you usually that sweet to strange men?” or if you met her at some coffeeplace or whatever, you could open the conversation with, “Do you always sit in the corner like a creep?”
  4. Beware of shittests. She’ll shittest you over text, but you don’t have to put yourself in a situation of a shittest. Honestly, I rarely get shittests over text because the conversation is so empty and dry that there is no war of frames between the two of us. We’re just discussing bullshit and she already feels like she’s known me for years.
  5. NEVER EVER GIVE HER VALIDATION. A model once sent me a picture of her dress she was wearing for her sister's wedding (obviously seeking validation). Instead of going like “Ewww, you look gorgeous!” I was like, “Jesus, take it off, you look like Cindrella" Am I discussing logistics? No. Should I ignore her texts and come across as autistic, why? That's weird. she's sharing with me her life and all I'm doing is making fun of it.

I hope that was of help, lads. If you have anything to add or need some clarification on something, please let me know!

[-] bruiser18 21 Points 3 months ago

I don't know mate, a lot of this seems like bollox to me.

always wait half the time shes taking to reply

Are you for real? Fuck that.

You've got some decent points, but a lot of this really doesn't belong in TRP.

[-] bakamoney 7 Points 3 months ago

That entire point is like "live in her frame "

[-] [deleted] 3 months ago
[-] alt_account_6 2 Points 3 months ago

I think what he should do is explain why he came to these conclusions, as they are not intuitive. That means using anecdotal or, better yet, empirical evidence.

I can come up with a number of principles about dating or texting but without some context and evidence I don't really have anything.

I see the iron law of seduction in here, which we all know already. So I'm struggling to see what else is important and supported by reality.

Edit: Also, paradoxically, following a bunch of rules means that you are investing more, and that you ultimately care about what happens becuase you are willing to play games. That is fundamentally opposed to an alpha mentality, in my opinion. Although I understand the need to at first receive some guidance to get on the right track.

[-] justarandomguy15 2 Points 3 months ago

In my humble opinion, I think everything can be taught and learnt, even behaviour or texting, for the matter. Some guys suck at texting, and learning how to do it right doesn't mean that you're setting yourself in her frame or is a beta behaviour. It's more like practicing day game: you try different things, you see what works for you, you keep doing it until it becomes intuitive.

The point of the post is to give a push for guys who're still new here. In my personal experience, before TRP 7 months ago, I used to text a lot and use it for actual talking. I'm still doing that, but much more constrained and controlled.

I get the point that texting should only used for discussing logistics, which I pointed out as the objective that you need to strive for while texting, but texting nowadays has become more than just setting up logistics and dates. It's something that people use regularly for multiple reasons. That's why I think flirting over text a little before meeting up is not a problem, if done correctly.

As for the evidence for my observations, mate, if I were to cite every instance in which I have learnt these conclusions, I'd end up writing a research paper. I tried to make it as straightforward as possible.

[-] chazthundergut 9 Points 3 months ago

Some good stuff but too much gibberish. Here is a simple guide:

  1. Text less frequently than her. Follow the 2/3 rule. For every 3 texts she sends, you send 2.

  2. Keep your texts short. Do not send girls a paragraph.

  3. Wait a few hours before texting her back. But mix it up sometimes, and text her back 10 minutes later. Do this infrequently. In general you want to give women as little of your non-sexual attention as possible, including texts. You want her chasing your validation. This is how you get chicks to drive over in the middle of the night just to suck you off for a few hours. Guard your validation and feed her crumbs.

  4. Follow the billboard rule. Assume every time you send a text that its gonna be blown up and plastered on a billboard for the world to read. Every time before I hit send I stop and apply this rule. It has been very useful.

  5. Text for logistics only. You can build a little rapport, but mostly you use texting to set up dates.

  6. No emojis. Ever. And use exclamation points very sparingly.
[-] warlordchad 3 Points 3 months ago

To piggyback on point 3, texting is a good place to practice power law 17, be unpredictable. Sometimes reply quickly, but generally wait awhile, and occasionally don’t text back for a day or too... obviously this all has to be calibrated, a point OP made well in the post (good stuff btw, don’t worry about the haters).

On a side note, I sent a girl a voice message the other day and she flipped—totally loved it. I also do this on Facebook messenger with another girl and that seems to work well. I’d be interested to know if other guys are doing this and whether it works for them.

[-] Sunguroglu 7 Points 3 months ago

Just text for logistics. Problem solved.

[-] ex_addict_bro 7 Points 3 months ago

No such thing as text game

Only rejection buffers

[-] red_philosopher 2 Points 3 months ago

Sorry, this is a bunch of shit. Texting constantly is an avoidance behavior built out of the fear of rejection. I get it, but ultimately it does one no favors to work on communicating over text when you can just make a fucking phone call. A real human conversation. Over the phone. Where she can hear your voice and you can make her laugh. All without having to spend literally forever typing a bunch of shit out. What are you a social retard?


[-] TheDiano 3 Points 3 months ago

Did you even read the post?

[-] red_philosopher -1 Point 3 months ago

I read half of it, and then perused the rest.

The big trap here is that it is an attempt at normalizing what is an antisocial behavior. It's not good for anyone, especially you. Framing the message in, "it's different than it was when texting was new," is nonsense. Texting has been relatively inexpensive for well over a decade.

Everyone has a fucking phone in their pocket these days, but nobody fucking uses it. Anyone who genuinely buys into the texting game is facing a losing proposition in the long run.

[-] TheDiano 5 Points 3 months ago

Go back and read the post. Also, EVERYONE texts so I don't know what world you live in. He basically said use texting for logistics, i don't know what you're so upset about

[-] OhUncleT-Bag 1 Point 3 months ago

So that should be your basic plan. Building rapport, gauging her texting receptiblity and closing with a date.

Jesus fuck, text game is literally date arranging after the date then text game should be natural and based off the date but prior, it's purely for arranging.

You want to gauge interest, snapchat, do they send nudes? No, next or yes, sweet!

I swear this stuff isn't meant for TRP.

[-] bakamoney 1 Point 3 months ago

There's no text game bro. For several reasons already covered by others.

The only text games that work are with the ones who already wanted go fuck you.

Second most people simply don't take texts seriously. Because they weren't retarded enough to ever had serious convos on text. ( I was)

Few girls might exist who take texting seriously but that'd unicorn hunting.

[-] bruiser18 1 Point 3 months ago

The only text games that work are with the ones who already wanted to fuck you.

What do you mean bro? I've got a couple girls who literally have told me to my face they wanna fuck etc and I have fucked some of them. What kind of 'text game' could be applied here?

[-] bakamoney 3 Points 3 months ago

None. They already want to fuck you.

Texting only keeps status quo neutral or take it down.

Its never positive.

[-] Zech4riah 1 Point 3 months ago

6 - Text game doesn't matter if she isn't into you in the first place. If cold-approaching, do most of the work before "text game".

[-] the_goatgrrrl 1 Point 3 months ago

if he's/she's REALLY interested, he/she will text back ...if he/she takes a long time replying (and has no good reason for it i.e. working as a surgeon or whatever) he/she is not that interested.


[-] awoke11 1 Point 3 months ago

This doesn’t belong in TRP, downvoted

[-] [deleted] 3 months ago
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[-] helterskelter1988 0 Points 3 months ago

If she’s taking 2 hours to reply, take 1 hour to reply back. Always wait half the time she’s taking to reply


This is conflicting advice. Waiting half the time she took to reply is investing more, as you're communicating your time is half less valuable than hers.

[-] bakamoney 0 Points 3 months ago

Also the point about emojis are funny AF because they look different depending on the medium/is/hardware/site being used.