One of the biggest concerns I hear from young guys (18-22), especially in today's age, is "missing out". Now while missing out can mean a lot of things, in this context I am going to relate it to girls, partying, and social life. In my last post titled "The New Cool", I talked about how the "college experience" is shoved down the throat of every young guy out there in American society and the belief is more or less that life ends after college in regards to girls, parties, and friends.
Your average college kid who is stressed in a demanding major (this assuming he went to college for the right reasons), lacks the connections that a frat bro might have (at some schools these can make or break your "college experience", being in a fraternity is more or less mandatory), having to struggle paying for college, and feels like he isn't having the time of his; this can be a depressing feeling. In mild cases, it can lead to a guy feeling sad and down about life as he sees some kids from his university having all the fun. In severe cases, you have a guy who become mentally unstable due to all of that depression, regret, and those sad feelings.
You feel this way because society has OVER-pedestalized youthful experiences such as high school and college, especially in regards to social life, parties, and girls. Not only that, just like most guys, you want to feel validated, cool, and fulfilled from these experiences. Your fear is that as you get older, the opportunities won't be there.
College is EVERYTHING in American culture when it comes to social life, friends, sex, parties, and fun. In American culture, you have a life after college but you're supposed to "grow up" and not enjoy it, it is supposed to be serious, boring, and highly cut throat.
For those who are familiar with college game and how it actually works, you end up realizing that most of the times the "college experience" is only granted to a very small number of guys. Most of the times, from my own experience, it was guys with rich parents and easier majors who could have the college experience. The guys whose parents paid thousands every semester for their kid to be in the right (keyword) fraternity and enjoy the things such as drinking, partying, picking an easy business major, making friends, social life, and getting girls.
In American culture, this is the apex of the male experience in terms of social life and sex. Every guy wants to be a Chad, no doubt about it, even though the "philosophers" and older guys on TRP will lecture on and on and on about how bad validation is, you can't help it as a guy just like you can't help being aroused by a beautiful woman. You want to socialize with other high SMV males, feel like you're in that special high value clique, get acknowledged by hot girls, and enjoy the fun experiences that come with it.
I am here to tell you it is okay to feel that way, even though some will nag and say "but wanting validation is bad, it is so immature" or "parties, girls, and casual sex are bad; you must find a life purpose". I am here to tell you that you should not feel guilty as a guy for wanting to make friends, party, and get laid; no matter how much the feminists or these days even some members of TRP (unfortunately) try to put you in that situation.
You fear that as you get older, you're going to miss the train. The parties, sex, and fun won't exist and even if it does exist; you're going to be a very odd one out for experiencing them. You fear that by the time you get older, the appropriate thing will be cheesy dates involving drinking wine and talking like some Renaissance poet as opposed to a Friday night full of hot sex after a nice party.
Relax.
Seriously, after reading all that, take a deep breath and relax.
Now here is the thing, you're hearing the stories of the losers!
Yes, the loser who got fat in college and married in his early 20s. The loser who peaked in college, made nothing of himself after that, and now goes around telling everyone how getting older sucks. The loser who whines about how "all the good ones are taken" (in regards to women) while he himself gets fatter, balder, and uglier every year. The loser who tries to show the world how he is taking a moral higher ground and hates the Leonardo DiCaprios and Dan Bilzerians of the world while secretly crying himself to sleep over the fact that he is not one of them.
Most importantly, the loser who likely only had success in his younger years due to rich parents who granted him everything and gave him an easy life and now can't adjust to the real world where he has to work for whatever he gets.
Unfortunately, it is the losers and failures that roar the loudest while winners stay quiet.
The loser with a nagging wife who could not handle life after college or working for anything is the one who is spreading this nonsense of college being the "best 4 years of your life". The Leonardo DiCaprios and Dan Bilzerians of the world won't waste time telling their awesome story, their lives are too amazing for them to even spend time doing so.
THE WORLD IS YOURS. Life does not end after college, NOT even when it comes to girls, partying, and social life. In fact, if you play your cards right, it will get a lot better. College life may have a great basement but it has a terrible ceiling, real life may have a terrible basement but it has a very high ceiling.
Girls?
Believe it or not, you will run into hotter girls than your typical bleached blonde sorority sister. Have you even seen how beautiful foreign women are compared to American women? Have you even seen how much hotter the women in the wealthier parts of NYC are compared to your typical basic bitch in an American college town? Most of all, a lot of these girls will likely be more sane than the typical spoiled bleached blonde sorority sisters that dominate your typical American college campus. Call it sour grapes on my part, whatever, but most guys will admit that there are much hotter girls out there than sorority girls and that European women are generally more attractive than American women.
I would take a threesome with two HBB Euro blondes over a threesome with two HBB sorority sisters, sure a lot of guys on here would as well.
But you will never be around as many hot and single girls!
Okay, maybe college DID have a lot of girls in the 18-21 year old age range, that doesn't mean shit. You lacked the resources to get the same girls who saw a frat boy with a dad bod as the beauty ideal for raising their states. The truth is that most big cities can readily offer you the same opportunities with women and have a lot more attractive women. I've seen just as many hot girls in Miami and wealthier parts of NYC as I saw in Tempe, AZ.
Plus, just because you're around so many available girls in college doesn't mean they're really that available. Most of the times they have to worry about being seen with you and how their judgmental friends, who they have to see EVERYDAY, would view it. If you sleep around a lot, on most college campuses the world will get out, college is even overhyped in this regard.
But WAH! That's only big cities and only certain ones!
Well captain dumbfuck, not every university is Arizona St or even close to it.
Partying?
Forget drinking cheap beer, the alcohol is way better after college. Yes, it is true that the parties might be LESS frequent (though you can break into professions where they are just as frequent) but they can be just as awesome. Go to nice rooftop pool parties in a major city, Halloween parties thrown by a higher SMV crowd, and realize that amazing parties exist after college. Yes, you can get drunk and wasted if you want in your late 20s and life will give you the opportunity to not only do so, but find other friends to do it with!
Social life?
Despite society and blue pill media doing EVERYTHING in its power to convince you that people after college are miserable loners without any friends, the truth is that social life happens after college. You won't just make friends with other 18-21 year olds who are emotional and filled with drama, you will make friends with amazing people. People praise college as being "so amazing because you're around others your age" but quickly forget how dramatic, emotional, and unstable a lot of 18-21 year olds are.
Nothing feels better than making it in life and being among others that have made it. Feel like the man by having other high SMV people in your circle as you watch the failures who used to think they were better than you suffer, okay that was a bit extreme but whatever! My point is, you don't stop having a social life after college and it doesn't even have to die down.
Here is the other thing, the next generation won't be "settling down" in their 20s.
The next generation will not be full of 25 year olds who are married with kids.
The next generation will be kind to the 30 year old guy who has his shit together, get ready to score and have an amazing life.
The next generation will grant you more opportunities to enjoy a nice social life and a lot of fun without feeling like a weirdo for being a bachelor past the age of 30.
The future is on YOUR side, so keep on working and realizing that a promising world awaits. Do not lose sleep over missing out, there is a lot you have yet to experience once you put in the work. Keep on raising that SMV fellas, life can get a lot better!
just_waitforit 7y ago
Thank you so much for this man. This is an amazing public service.
I wish you all the success for this life.
DUDETUDE101 7y ago
Thank you for this. There's a mentality that the idea of "missing out" can foster in young guy. A victim mentality. I started university this year, doing computer science and have many friends doing easier majors. They were going out while I was studying and it started to weigh on me. "Why do I have so much more work than these guys?" , I used to think. My Dad told me that the hard work now does not mean I'll never get to have fun. This post was the same kind of message but it just hit me harder. I'll never feel left out again, there's no such thing.
ShavedApel 7y ago
I live in a university area, when I walk down the streets I look in through the windows and see a bunch of good looking guys who lift standing around throwing ping pong balls, or screaming on the front porch with 4:1 guy girl ratio. Maybe its better in USA?
The guys who partied it up and had an awesome time could have done the same without going to college, you don't have to be in college to meet them at night time. College happened to be in the cards for them because of their privileged parents and their friends also attending.
dotte11 7y ago
My college experience was profound shit lol. Oh well, w/e
sdonaldsonjr 7y ago
Wait until you are out of college, well established in your job making a ton of money.. the cars you drive, the parties you can throw, the girls you can attract is a million times better.
Take a college course after having a bunch of money and a sick car and see all of the hot young college girls trying to get to know you. These are the same kinds of girls that were getting wrecked at Frat parties while you were in school and wanted nothing to do with you and everything to do with the kids that wanted to pay for friendship and acceptance.
Eyeswears 7y ago
Youth is wasted on the young.
askmrcia 7y ago
I agree with this post 1000%. Just for the record I played football at my university and attended all the big parties.
Life after college is way better. And when you are in your mid 20s and early 30s, you have far more access to girls because the age range is from 18-35ish. While in college it's 18-22.
Now I won't say I was a balls to the wall party guy in college, but I have attended all the large parties from spring fest, Halloween and ones thrown by fraternities (despite not ever joining one).
In my opinion those are overrated and nothing like the Project X movie. For people that attended actual large parties know what I'm talking about. The cool kids are usually the ones playing drinking games, talking, and chillin. The not so cool kids are the ones going balls to wall, getting drunk, throwing up, trying their hardest to get girls attention because they lack attention. But most large parties I've attended were just guys drinking while music was playing while being in tight spaces.
People watch these movies and act like every large college party is a giant orgy. It's not. And usually the girls sleeping around, trust me, you don't want them anyways. They are usually not as hot as Hollywood movies make them appear.
The hottest girls have boyfriends or hooking up with guys in secret, but not getting train ran on them at these parties like movies make it seem.
With all that said college parties is cool because you can meet people, but I won't say you're missing out because most parties are not like the ones from that movie project x.
Now after college, it gets way better. I'm 26 and I've had 10x more fun after college. The people you meet are better (hopefully) and you will have far more options for girls.
You also get different themed parties unlike college. You can have things happening in clubs, outside BBQs, bar events, house parties, rooftop parties, outside raves, pool parties, beach parties, camping trip parties, and much more. Your options get so much bigger outside of college. Hell I joined a fundraising campaign group with tons of hot girls and cool guys and the people who run that fundraiser throws parties, which is how I met my current girlfriend.
I understand that it can be a little tougher to meet people after college, but all I did was join a co ed flag football league and I kept meeting people from there. I know this was a long post, but I want to say it gets so much better after college. Go downtown Chicago in the summer at night, the streets are filled with people living it up. And you have ages from 21-45+. That's way better than anything I did at Ohio state or Ohio University (two known party schools).
Also one more thing, no gives a fuck how many women you banged or how cool you were in college in the real world. Case and point, no one gives a shit that I played football in college (as I'm sure you guys really don't as well), so don't feel bad for missing out because no really talks about college experiences in the real world.
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SnarkyFella 7y ago
I was a loser/nerd in the past. Now 25 and I'm in the best position ever. Out of college, no debt, great job, lifting and making gains. I grew late and stopped growing at 21 (6'4"). I'm saving, investing, reading/learning and have all of this new RP knowledge. My own potential is through the roof. Every man (young or old) has unlimited potential. Focus on right now.
M1ster_MeeSeeks 7y ago
I'd say the exact same thing except that I'm 6'1'' and am self employed in a business I opened with a close friend - also 25 + saving/learning/reading/lifting. Cheers man, the future looks bright.
I used to get criticized by family + friends for working long hours. I don't think they'll be saying anything when I'm making their lexus payments.
SnarkyFella 7y ago
Don't let their criticism bother you. Go 110% on your entrepreneurial efforts to avoid being a wage slave/cubicle slave.
M1ster_MeeSeeks 7y ago
Amen to that.
Entrepreneurs are the only people who will work 80 hours/week to avoid having to work 40.
[deleted] 7y ago
May I ask you what you do for a living?
I'm glad you're doing great. Cheers.
[deleted] 7y ago
May I ask you what you do for a living?
I'm glad you're doing great. Cheers.
[deleted] 7y ago
dude same. I was an omega male until 9th grade. Then I was a beta. Then just under a year ago, I found TRP and started making drastic changes. Now I'm sigma. I don't know if I'll ever fully be alpha, but I am proof that it's possible to change.
_vend7u 7y ago
Hi, How did you lose your college debt?
I'm 16 and i don't know whether to get a degree because of how expensive it is.
PinkySlayer 7y ago
Take some advice from me, if you aren't afraid of hard work, I know people working as welders and mechanics in power plants and paper mills making WELL over 90k a year, many of them without a ged. If I could do it all over again I wouldn't waste a single second in a traditional university. I'd get my welding cert or my millwright cert and hit the road, work for 10-15 years, save as much as I could and invest wisely. Seriously kid, I'm not even thirty yet so I still have plenty of time to really increase my earnings in this field, but if you go to a trade school or get an apprenticeship through a union you can be retired by 40 if you aren't stupid as fuck with your money.
SnarkyFella 7y ago
2 year technical diploma. Cost like 15k and i'm making 60k at entry level. Eliminated the debt as fast as possible and am now saving/investing. A degree is not everything. Check out the book worthless by aaron clarey.
Horus_Krishna_2 7y ago
depends on degree, and what college you go to. try to keep that debt to a minimum, but would I recommend not going to college at all so you have zero debt? no. in addition to the education, you need to make connections and just get that piece of paper degree which opens doors. but yeah don't go making a bad move where you get a liberal arts degree from a private school where the tuition is like 30k a year.
RPwhitefrost 7y ago
Just my advice: if you live in a state w/ a good state school with fairly low tuition, then take advantage of it. I live in NJ where, luckily, we have Rutgers. It has a good reputation, and tuition is only $13k (I commute so I save the $13k that would otherwise be spent on room and board). Idk what your grades are like but I got $10k in scholarships from academics alone (from the school and outside scholarships). So don't slack off in high school.
Sure, I'd love to live on campus/just off it but I'd much rather save $13k a year and graduate with no debt. besides, I've made the best friends I could ever imagine and we still go out and get the college lifestyle for the most part despite living at home.
F_Dingo 7y ago
Don't let the cost deter you, some degrees are actually worth the money (accounting, finance, chem engineering, etc) because you'll actually be able to make money with them as opposed to say, gender studies. The biggest thing is knowing why you're going to college, don't be some schlub who is just there to be there and racks up a bunch of debt.
If you want to be a lawyer, you'll need to go to college for law school. If you want to be an accountant, you'll need to go to college. If you want to be a chemical engineer, you'll need to go to college.
quartermanpete 7y ago
Consider picking a trade. You frequently get to work for pay while you apprentice and there is an extreme shortage of qualified tradesmen in America. The jobs pay good and you dont have to deal with the college bullshit. If you pick the wrong major or associate with the wrong groups, you may come out stupider than you came in.
_Trigglypuff_ 7y ago
Recently went to Croatia. The ugly girls here are better better than average women in western countries. It's insane how attractive the women are here whilstbretards marry some stupid bitch that wouldn't even get looked at over here.
DarkSage1796 7y ago
Thanks man. I really needed this. I'm just going to focus on school, lifting and the occasional approach.
[deleted] 7y ago
While I agree that the college experience isn't everything and your 20s and 30s can be just as fulfilling and fun, if not more, I have to disagree that only a handful of guys (mainly rich kids, as OP put it) get to experience the "dream" college lifestyle.
I wasn't in a frat, I'm not Adonis, and I only played beer league hockey. But I partied with a popular frat. My crew (non frat), which spanned a number of different locations, threw huge bangers, and I went from having sex with a total of two women in high school to over 20 after I left college and that included being in a relationship with a hard 9 for a year. Not to mention my degree is an engineering / business hybrid, not exactly a cake walk, and I interned sophomore through senior year at 3 different fortune 500 companies.
My point is, you can have the college experience. Don't monk mode yourself for four years because you're not a rich kid and they're the only ones who get the chance to do it up. You'll stunt your social skills
StumpinToVictory 7y ago
Well in that case it depends on your college, at my school and at MOST large party schools, you HAVE to be in a fraternity (especially true for SEC and ACC schools).
[deleted] 7y ago
I still don't understand the problem. Then join a frat. You don't have to be a rich kid to do so.
StumpinToVictory 7y ago
Yes you do have to be rich if you want to be in the RIGHT frat.
edwardhwhite 7y ago
Your 40s are your best of all if you keep lifting.
BehrGris 7y ago
I can definitely see why you'd say this.
My dad is 6'3", and got locked up for 15 years when I was born, so he's jacked. Now he's a car salesman, making good money, and has a new girlfriend every 2 weeks, literally, every 2 weeks.
And the weird part about it is he doesn't even try, he's a Christian, gave his life to God (that whole thing) and doesn't even go out chasing women, 20 something year olds just come to him
Tough_Luv 7y ago
That gives me hope. Why do you say that?
30yo changing careers to medicine, 8-11 years of work ahead of me. I do well as an actuary, have good savings, and bring a few new tinderellas home every month, but hate doing meaningless work just for a paycheck.
I'll be our of residency between 39-42 depending on what I choose.
Rickey985 7y ago
Any advice for a 2nd student thinking of being an actuary?
Tough_Luv 7y ago
What exactly do you mean by 2nd student?
And starting taking exams ASAP!
Rickey985 7y ago
I'm in my 2nd year currently, I have completed 2 exams, have my third scheduled for next month, and I've worked as a data analyst intern for a sports team.
Even with this, I still get rejected. Any advice?
Tough_Luv 7y ago
You're kidding right? I've never had problems getting work, and the demand is higher then ever in actuarial right now.
I had a 2.85 undergrad from Carnegie Mellon and 1 exam. I got a job at the rotational program at Progressive Insurance.
You're GPA is shit, your resume needs work, or you aren't interviewing well. Or some combination of the three.
Rejected for what? Your a 2nd year. You apply for jobs in your 4th.
Rickey985 7y ago
How many years ago was it when you had your first actuarial job?
My gpa is 3.4, I've had my resume looked over several times at the actuarial outpost. Have not gotten interviews for actuarial internships yet.
Tough_Luv 7y ago
I'm 31 now, a good 10 years ago. I applied at a job fair at school.
Feeling nice today lol, send me your resume to look it over.
Please don't abuse this email address: cdinico1@gmail.com
chaseemall 7y ago
Are you just born to do medicine?
Or is it just that you don't want to be an actuary anymore? Because, if it's the latter then there's gotta be some other pivot you can make that lets you use all the knowledge you've built rather than starting from scratch with medicine.
Tough_Luv 7y ago
You'll never truly know what your born to do until you try.
I can't work in the corporate world anymore, doing pointless work to pad company profits. Eliminate every actuary on the planet and the world is no different. The job is fluff. If you want easy high paying work and you're strong academically go for it, but to me that's a pathetic way to live life.
My mathematical and technical skills will give me a direct advantage over all of my medical school competition. Not a single person will be on my level. Then let's talk about being confidant, assertive, decisive, a strong leader with effective communication skills. When I step into an interview I gain 10 points, my autistic reserved chinese medical school competition will get negative 1 million.
Life skills translate to every profession, and I've gained much during my 20s.
Ultimately any high paying career will put you in a good financial position. Medicine has a high entry cost, but the debt will get paid down and savings will accumulate by the time you actually need them.
So choose a similar profession, eventually feel regret and want to get out again wasting more time and resources, or go 180 and fully dedicate yourself to it and make that shit happen. First day of the rest of your life.
Feel me?
edwardhwhite 7y ago
Because it is my experience
Tough_Luv 7y ago
As is implied by your original comment, I was asking for the rationale behind it.
Like: "I have complete financial freedom, and ...."
edwardhwhite 7y ago
Because women love older men. Its like shooting fish in a barrel if you are in shape. They come up to me. My sense of abundance is still behind my results.
Just totally different.
Tough_Luv 7y ago
I love hearing things like this.
But sorry, when I hit 40 there will be no women left for other men, including you ;)
Stay vigilant.
centurySeries 7y ago
You're a brave man, I was kinda considering the same thing but I'm not sure I'll go through with it. I totally sympathize with doing meaningless work. Best of luck to you.
Tough_Luv 7y ago
The way I see it...
I'm extremely fit and confidant. My male classmates will peril in comparison to me. I'll pickup whatever girls I want from class, not spend a dime on them, and keep my balls empty. The lack of income and debt won't matter. Even now before starting the mention of medical school, despite the long road and debt is generating tingles.
Then you graduate and conquer the fucking earth.
No bravery needed. Just discipline and patience.
hamsterbator 7y ago
not worth it to be honest. too much time spent to the ratio of benefit. been there did that.
Tough_Luv 7y ago
If your primary motivation is $, I agree. $ is not even on my list.
hamsterbator 7y ago
Time is the most important commodity you have. Medicine is the worst time sink and you are signing your personal freedom away. You're not young anymore and residency at that age will tax you more than you think.
Tough_Luv 7y ago
Not if your wasting it. I see two kinds of people in this world.
A) consumers. They can work a job just for a paycheck. They get fulfillment from their social and personal lives.
B) producers. work is everything, we derive our value from our contribution to society and personal accomplishments.
I'm B. I'd rather be learning, building knowledge, doing meaningful work as opposed to anything considered leisure.
I have so much time an energy to waste I often lift twice a day and never take rest days. I'm 6'1' 235 8% bf bodybuilder.
I only want to learn, work, fuck, eat, lift. Don't care about trips, possessions, sports, entertainment, etc.
And I already have an abundance of women, and none of them bat an eyelash at my pontential lack of income over the next 5 years. They all are double down hard on my dick after hearing "medical school" and "doctor" even though I'm just getting started.
Tough_Luv 7y ago
So who cares if I'm working 70 hours a week when 100% of my time outside of that is lifting fucking eating. As a man should. No fluff.
Tough_Luv 7y ago
And I already work a 40 hour job, while volunteering an an EMT, taking an EMT training course, preparing for the MCAT, keeping up with bobybuilding, clean house, home cooked meals, happy dog.
hamsterbator 7y ago
You're as idealistic as every medical student who ever was. Same as I was. The ratio of complete bullshit you have to deal with to the fulfillment factor in medicine is incredibly low. Most doctors aren't happy they mostly look forward to going home at the end of the day. But you'll learn. Good luck.
Tough_Luv 7y ago
Honestly I appreciate the discussion, but I just think you're bitter.
Of course there will be hard work along the way. Of course you need to do things you don't necessarily want to. That's called being an adult, a man.
Last week as an EMT I helped an old lady with a broken hip. I volunteered 8 hours that day, didn't get a cent, but she thanked me a gave me a hug. Would do again without hesitation. Did I spend most of the day sitting around the firehouse? Did I fill out a shitload of paperwork. Yup. Totally worth it.
Show me one profession that is more fulfilling and not because of the paycheck? One that is intellectually challenging, ultimately high paying, and generally regarded very highly?
Seriously... what specifically in your experience made you this way? Did you complete med school? Residency? What type of medicine? What do you do now?
Horus_Krishna_2 7y ago
much respect, maybe bravery is wrong word, but you're basically talking about taking the red pill, it's easier said than done. have to rip off the bandaid and yeah it hurts a little at first. but yes the rewards are endless.
35 beta here but I recently took red pill and I'm lifting. Possible to be cleaning up in my 40s but need to never give up, stay on the right path.
gestalts 7y ago
This is 100% correct. The term 'late bloomer' definitely has a basis in truth. I wish I had realised this sooner and it would have saved me much grief and self-critizsm.
I'm 28 now. In college and especially highschool i felt inferior for because of nerddom and interests that didnt appeal to women.
But through hard work, maturity and a bit of a shift in the preferences for women (nerds and programming are cool now that you can make massive amounts of money in it and it is in such high demand) im now ahead of the peers who were partying away the college years. I make six figures in a big city when most people my age still live with parents or roomates due to few real well paying jobs at this age outside of tech. I live alone in a nice appartment. The importance of this cannot be overstated. It shows status, wealth, and leads to the seamless ability to close the deal without any outside inconveniences. It makes them feel safe.
And as much as it seems otherwise, women absolutely find intelligence and wit sexy, but only when you have confidence, drive, and an abundance mentality also. If you are good looking and fuck them theyll want you for a bit. If you fuck their minds too they will never leave.
At 28 there is essentially limitless pussy. You can be as picky as you want (you should be).
tijger897 7y ago
This is the post I needed. Thank you for this. It makes the mund at ease :)
ACE-JHN 7y ago
Made a lot of sense to me 20 year old guy here. Honestly don't know what the fuck I'm doing in life, besides degree health and exercise science pre-physical therapy and training. Thought I had to join one of these when i transferred to one of the big universities, now I'm going to stick it out and hit up the parties when I need to.
improvingme63 7y ago
It's funny. By the time I had read down to the point where you wrote "Relax" I had built up a tremendous amount of tension in my body. This was a great article.
Many people don't understand that life is what you fucking make it. We all have the potential to do and become so much. If there is something that isn't happening in your life that you want or even feel a need for, chances are, other people want it too.
If it doesn't exist, create it, nothing bad can come from it. If it is a success, good for you man! If it fails, boom, you have yourself a lesson.
ScottishIslander 7y ago
The college "experience" of sex, parties, and tons of hot girls doesn't happen to everyone. It only happens to the top 10% of men. The ones who are attractive, athletic, and on the football team.
College IS some of the best years of your life, but not for the reasons society wants you to believe. It's the best because, anything is possible going forward. As you get older, responsibilities continue to pile on. If you adapt well, you will have no problem handling these responsibilities. But there is a sort of "freedom" in college where you can choose whether or not to go to a class. You can choose what interests you. You can forge your own path. If you work, the job is usually low stress, and sometimes fun.
Your primary goal should always be yourself. Work on improving yourself. Lift. Have interesting hobbies. Above all else - do well in school. The world is getting more and more competitive. It's not enough to "just pass" or even skate by with B's. You need to be in the top 50% AT MINIMUM. You will have a much easier time finding a job if you are in this crowd.
Live a balanced life. Go to some parties here and there, but don't make it your life. Do things that make you happy. Find ways to travel.
If you take care of yourself, you are WAY more attractive to those HB 9s from campus when you are in your late 20s and early 30s. You have experience at this point and (hopefully) your life is on track.
Don't go all monk mode in college to come out on top. I know a lot of guys like this. I am in my late 20s now and I see it all the time. These guys never dated a woman. They have no experience with women. And as a result, they are totally lost when it comes to gaming them. They are successful career-wise, but they are so beta that women can smell it 5 minutes after meeting them. They don't get girls EVEN though they are successful. BALANCE is the key. Date some women in college, because the experience with women will help you later.
Always be learning. Always be improving. Always be pushing the boundaries of what is comfortable for you.
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[deleted] 7y ago
Good post. I'm 23 and was lucky to find my inner Chad during my last year of college. The shit I did was legendary. But I've started feeling like I'm on a downwards slope now that the college dream is over. The reality is I simply moved out of a liberal college beach town into a small conservative area in the midwest. Of course people and women are fucking different here. I need to get out of here and push myself back into the unknown.
BasicallyIt 7y ago
Gonna have to disagree with a lot of this. I graduated college last year and I can confirm they were the best four years of my life thus far (being 23 now, full-time job and still meeting women post college). I am not fat, I am not balding, I am not a loser.
I will admit that "real life" and being in your mid twenties can definitely be your prime, and will most likely be mine as well, so long as you make good money, support yourself, take care of yourself mentally and physically, and go through the motions of meeting new women. But in college, I did all of the partying, smoking blunts on week nights, having mind blowing sex after parties and going out every single weekend pretty much no matter what.
I also did an average major but ended up working in finance full time post college, so there goes that myth of having an easy major but no good job to show for it. I guess it's all based on perspective, but some parts of this post ring truth I guess.
StumpinToVictory 7y ago
You're 23 and figuring it all out.
Also, you can do all that after college but you picked finance so ya, it's gonna suck, those hours are brutal.
BasicallyIt 7y ago
I'm on a four day schedule and get off every other thurs-sun. I'm not worried about the schedule.
[deleted] 7y ago
TL;DR - Don't worry about every benchmark put out there by other folks -- work on yourself. Alone time is selfish time with which you can better prepare for the world (ie, don't waste that alone time playing Counterstrike). Don't ever get so lonely that you "settle" for girls with no ambition and whose best quality is they'll simply talk to you and project they'll settle for you.
I don't often agree with TRP posts, but this post I wholeheartedly endorse. Improve you, and you'll need to spend less time worrying about making shit happen. And keep lifting. :)
KenMastersMD 7y ago
The reason this becomes an issue is because people lack their own personal mission in college. They try to live up to the expectations that have been laid out by the media and others. Don't compare yourself to others. Compare yourself to yourself. Everyone is on a different path.
AceBenedict23 7y ago
Needed to hear this.
As a 20 y/o college student I always wanted to live out all the crazy party nights in highschool and college. I've had a few great ones and a few awful ones. It really came down to if you have a great social circle that can organize stuff.
You made great points. Now that I'm doing online classes it makes it way less depressing to reinforce that the future is in my hands. If I grind hard enough I can reach a high enough SMV where other great doors can open up socially.
We're all gonna make it brah.
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AFPJ 7y ago
Honestly, I can't even imagine what that must be like. Was busy getting my ass beat and stabbed on the street before signing up to put peoples guts back inside them under live gunfire in third world shitholes. But, I'd wager that having a relatively low happiness baseline in youth has led me to be much happier now since the mind is a relative machine.
epixs 7y ago
Bro I love your content but you know who OP was writing to in this situation. I was in a top tier fraternity as well, social chair, in medical school right now, worked as a bouncer and was invited to parties thrown by millionaires since I did private security, etc...but I did this all while being aware of TRP early on. A lot of guys didn't have that luxury. And no, my parents didn't pay for shit.
If anything, being able to work as a bounce and being invited to the parties the 30+ guys threw who were rich as a 21 y/o helped me realize how much better parties are when you have real $$$. Hot women will always be there, trust me some of these girls at the rich guy parties were gorgeous and the ratio was always like 4:1 +
EwokPenguin 7y ago
Frat life is also what turned me red pill. I whole heartily recommend it to anyone in college. My worry, as a graduating senior, is what OP was talking about. That after college life will suck. This post did alleviate some of my worries, but I don't think anything will compare to fraternity life.
I would appreciate some of your input on life after fraternities.
StumpinToVictory 7y ago
drinking and partying 1x a week? That's not the college experience bro!
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squidracer 7y ago
Life after the frat was every better.. Without the classwork it was easy to go drinking 3-4 times a week.. Not to mention the extra money..
If picking up girls is easy in college, chances are it'll be just as easy after. I'm in my 30s and it's still easy
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[deleted] 7y ago
Why stop there?
Douche game works postgrad on single working women in their 20s. It works on wall-smashers looking for a husband to lock down. It works on cheating milfs too.
I'll let you know if frat,bro, muscle game works in retirement in 15 years. My bet, it works!!
Interisti10 7y ago
The enginerds will earn more than you over their lifetime i'm sorry to say
disclaimer: neither a frat boy or an enginerd
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Horus_Krishna_2 7y ago
STEM degrees are top notch, lawyers are good but in that next tier just cuz it's overcrowded like you say.
SirWazzaBrookBanks 7y ago
That's not the point - they can earn as much as they like but if they're not made aware of the state of the game they'll lose it in a divorce just as easily as a guy working at a gas-station.
[deleted] 7y ago
Any of the "enginerds" here are already aware of that fact, by the nature of being here.
Newsflash : women aren't everything.
VasiliyZaitzev 7y ago
GLO, while you aren't wrong, he's writing for a particular audience. Like you, I was in a house, had a blast, went to law school and killed it afterwards. He's downplaying the the experience, which is fine, because there is certainly hope for guys who didn't do that and suffer from FOMO; he's trying to show them their path forward.
[deleted] 7y ago
Funnily enouhg, that can be the experience. My university wasn't at all like you describe.
Now my first year in the military? That was animal house.
FOMO is a bitch, and there's a new crop of bitterness coming up in TRP, if OP staves it off in a better direction, great. Personally, I like you, and GLO's perspective on it. It self selects for those who will change, as opposed to hand holding them through the process.
I find that rock bottom moment of revelation and action are parts you just cannot skip, and feelgood stuff tends to get there.
Will see, I honestly hope you are right, would be better than my pessimism on the state of manhood
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VasiliyZaitzev 7y ago
I might be inclined to agree, if we were talking about a broader audience, but he's addressing guys who are at least woke up enough to be reading TRP. For those guys, if they didn't have it together before, then, yeah, this really is their shot. Some % of them will figure it out, and the rest will return to the plow.
It's the same guys I try to reach with the Life After 30: How to Be an Old Guy post.^1 Some guys will make it over and join us in the Happy Hunting Grounds, and some will auger in. We can try to show them the path upwards, but I'm too often reminded of an old joke from the 80s the punchline for which is, "What do you mean I abandoned you? I sent you two boats and a helicopter." /shrugs
^1 I realize I've "triggered" 2 or 3 of my fanbois by posting it again. For those guys, not every guy reads every thread, and new guys come to TRP every day. I post for those guys. You don't have to click the link. Save everyone the trouble, and move on to the next post.
TRP_Lee_zard 7y ago
Fully agree - the post seems to suggest a way of thinking "I'm a nerd now...but wait, you'll see what I will become someday"
High school/Uni jocks might become the married "looser" but the beta-nerd can as well. Even worse, after studying, saving money and becoming successful he is the prime target for post-wall bitches, who plan to settle down after riding the CC for years.
AstralAeonSoul 7y ago
... and getting plowed by women - during divorce, that is.
Horus_Krishna_2 7y ago
always wondered why you had such a gay name
haxurmind 7y ago
About that name.
PorkNails 7y ago
While its hard to change, its not impossible. Who you are is not something set in stone and if the post helps motivate a few, giving the idea that one doesn't have to be a sad fat fuck forever, might be worth it no?
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Vanq86 7y ago
Not to discredit your experience, but could your sample set be skewed simply be who you are? I've seen a lot of people make complete transformations after college - chubby nerds who were so distraught about 'not getting the girl' doing complete 180s and hitting the gym, learning new skills, making tons of money, and becoming general pussy magnets. I think a lot of guys hold themselves back from reaching their potential due to the guilt mentioned by OP, and escaping the daily reminder of how they aren't 'measuring up' frees them up to focus on what they were capable of all along if they could have just gotten past the mental block.
PorkNails 7y ago
I lost family and friends due to fear of change, so I no longer expect change from anyone. But if they do change, good for them.
[deleted] 7y ago
yup. I think when I first got on here, you were saying that 80% of the guys here are probably posers, won't lift, and don't want to fix, they just want to wallow.
The longer I stay, the more I see the depth of your wisdom.
Even rollo, in his post on the secret of redpill. you can read all the posts you want, if you aren't doing shit, then it's useless
drakpanther 7y ago
TRP is about self improvement. Once a chump always a chump doesn't jive with that. People aren't black and white. There is gray scale. I was in a great house at a big greek school. It was a blast and I wouldn't trade the experience for anything.. but there were guys on campus killing it without the social support system of greek life. Big parties and hot girls. GDI hard mode. Thats alpha. Thats TRP.
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[deleted] 7y ago
Same thing applies literally everywhere. A gym relies on people not showing up to be profitable. 80% of the people who sign up, don't go regularly.
melxer 7y ago
That's the same concept as awalt, at first you're enclined to believe not but confronted with the reality and statistics you have no choice but to admit the rule. It has to do with the fact that one can't reorganize his entire brain, psychic structure and brain chemistry. Those are the things that determine drive. You can't do anything to change your drive. Unless you're like Bobby Joe and get insane sexual drive after brain damage.
You might be able to change people before 10 with a correctly designed therapy if you know that the kid's behavior leads to a bad personality later on, or with the right continuous inputs during the teenage years, but after 17-18 the die is cast.
That being said, even that "anti-social chump" of yours can improve according to his own standards and the things that drive him. He'll still be a beta according to your framework, just as you are considered a beta by people superior to you by any significant metric, but he won't care about what others think of him and he'll feel a lot better about himself, that does him and others a favor.
Vanq86 7y ago
Exactly.
This post is more about escaping the yoke of preconditioned guilt for feeling like a 'loser' during college - in reality college life isn't 'real' and things only get easier once you've got the time, finances, and lack of bullshit drama that college life typically entails.
'Chump' is kind of a bullshit label anyway, a carryover from those still stuck in the college mindset. Every social circle has a hierarchy, and the 'chumps' of one circle can be the Chads of their own. Once out of college people are free to construct their own social circles where they'll be the 'Chad' - free of competition from the historical, preordained Alphas of their past. For a lot of guys, just getting away from that constant subconscious measuring stick makes a world of difference, allowing them to reach a potential they were holding themselves back from attaining.
sierratangovictor 7y ago
Why so much nerd bashing? Isnt that what the typical Woman and Chad does ? Why are we so eager to merge into that kind of demographics?
Aren't the enginerd-s the people who build cities?
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sierratangovictor 7y ago
Nerds aren't first damaging themselves riding the CC then trying to manipulate you to provide for their damaged souls... that is the difference.
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sierratangovictor 7y ago
What makes them weak? Their muscles? That is not the benchmark of the strength of a civilized society.
A nerd is much more likely to raise an ethically strong son than a generic chad. Ethical strength holds a civilization up. Becoming the strongest bull of a primitive hunter gatherer tribe does not seem to be the best goal of a civilization.
There is not correlation between a being Nerd and accepting the Zeitgeist. A nerd is more likely to construct something tangible despite the zeitgeist and society constantly bashing him. And this will often be something the whole society can benefit from. Is that what you designate as weak? That is terribly similar to the voice of a western woman.
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[deleted] 7y ago
It's not ethically strong sons in general doing this.
It's a very specific group of people who have taken the leading role in doing this (by their own admission).
sierratangovictor 7y ago
Borderline racist, aren't we?
No, not necessarily. Moral, the practice of ethics, certainly is relative but ethics themselves are probably not.
Reading a lot of Nationalist propaganda, aren't we?
By the way, Steve Jobs is also one of the Sand people
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sierratangovictor 7y ago
No, I come to TRP to get knowledge. And know, this is not challenging my belief - lol not everything challenges my belief - this is what I have found illogical.
But anyway, since this is come to mockery instead of debate, I will let you have your way.
Docbear64 7y ago
This is one of those posts that usually would make me reduce what OP is saying and add a YMMV sticker to it but if I look at the difference in my own life between 25 and 26 it has very clearly been the closing of the childish chapter in my life and the beginning of embracing myself like a man.
25 and under I was ok with women bur feared them . Had shitty jobs and thought I deserved shitty jobs and had no clue how to foster or generate success in any area of my life.
After 26? I have a good job that pays,me well, have attracted approached and had more fun with women than I ever had ( they only bite if you let them guys) , and I understand why life, the world, and God smile on me now . It's because I DO I don't sit and wait for good things to happen I keep my eyes open and leap when opportunity glances at me.
The best is yet to come guys and personally I'm ecstatic for my 30's I'm going to put my current self to shame.
Philhelm 7y ago
I'll have to disagree, to an extent. The thing about a male "missing out" during his youth isn't necessarily related to the stereotype of college partying, but how young men see their peers have experiences that they do not, and feeling left out. For the disenfranchised, this is generally going to be a feeling that begins around high school, and which may or may not persist throughout college and beyond.
Speaking from experience, even when things get much better, a form of neuroticism can develop in which nothing can ever fill the gap of bitter memories.
I'll also add that there are plenty of chronic partiers who become successful after college. A schmoozer is almost always going to win when pitted against those who study and work hard, unfortunately.
StumpinToVictory 7y ago
Not really, most guys just want social life, sex, and some social events to take part in.
HomesickADTR 7y ago
This is super encouraging. As a 22 year old man in college who feels like he's missing out on social life, I thank you for offering me these kind words.
UpVoter3145 7y ago
Same, it's good to see that being busy and not being able to go through the "typical" experience isn't necessarily a bad thing.
privilegechecked85 7y ago
Just hit 30 this year. I would NEVER go back to college. Life is way better at 30 than it was 20, and I expect the same to be true at 40.
s54b32dd 7y ago
College was a lot of fun; I go back to visit every once in a while & take in a good football game for nostalgia's sake. Then, I go around & hit the bars with my brother & his friends, and I'm the one who gets all the attention because I don't buy rail drinks, I have my family's good looks, I have money for nice clothes, and I have interesting stories to tell because my life didn't stop when I graduated.
College is great, and I wouldn't trade those early adulthood experiences for the world; that being said, my life is waayyyy more rewarding now, and I'm way less insecure about myself because I've been able to realize many of my early adulthood goals, and that makes me a very care-free, easy going person that others want to be around.
ArthurBingKing 7y ago
Same, 30s really allowed me to hit my stride. If anything, I found that middle school, high school and college took me in a very bluepill direction. Trying to fit into a specific clique was not always easy, and changing yourself to do so is wrong. Coming out of that mindset and into one's actual self was the right way to go and it took a good chunk of my 20s to fix and drop blue pill thoughts.
Vanq86 7y ago
Amen. I hit 30 recently and agree completely with the comments above. I wouldn't go back to 20 even if I could.
BehrGris 7y ago
I hit my stride of actually having a social life at 24, I'm 25 now.
I've been going out as much as I can since I hit 21, but now I actually have a crowd of cool people to party and after-party with where before I was going out by myself and making random friends for the night.
And we do this every night, best clubs in Milwaukee, don't have to pay cover or wait in lines (I party with a few club promoters as well). All of this is still so fun and new to me as I'd never gotten invited to parties in high school or college, so yeah, life definitely gets better after 22. I'm also making a lotta money now so that helps.
But I will have to admit that my new nightclub cocaine habit helped introduce me to this life, but hey "You can only be 20 something for 10 years"
[deleted] 7y ago
As other said, if you want to see what your friends are really like, then just as an EXPERIMENT try quitting drugs for a month. See if they call or care.
Keep your druggie friends apart from your real friends (have plenty of real friends!). Your ambition and success in life is GREATLY tied into the quality of your network of friends. Friends help get you places. Coasters coast.
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[deleted] 7y ago
Ime, drugs friends aren't really your friends. It's a very surface level friendship
sejintsume 7y ago
True that! And when you decide that you want to "quit", its very difficult to be friends with those individuals. If not outright impossible. They'll always drag you into the same old shit.
nabosch 7y ago
Milwaukee bar/club scene is actually pretty legit. Finding good people to hit them with is the hard part. Gives some hope that you're out there after undergrad.
LLL3peat 7y ago
It can be and of can't be. Then again I was on the other side. Kind of. Rented a house off Murray and Webster. Walking distance to north ave. Cool strip but for me I didn't have any luck there. Didn't really have any luck anywhere in Milwaukee. It was when I turned 21 was when I had a change of pace and decided to cut off booze and hit the weights and books. Got rid of my debt. Moved home to accomplish things instead of drink every weekend.
I will agree it is hard to find a good group for awhile. Then again I'm naturally an introvert and would rather hit the weights and some books rather than club. Smaller house parties is where its at.
Used. To be all up in suite before it changed the name and club. Honestly the best quality women I've found is off Milwaukee street and over by plum.
nabosch 7y ago
Yea the area by plum is nice. North ave is generally pretty dead, third street and water always has the nice looking Marquette girls, it's usually a good time
kremer5 7y ago
that's not a good habit bro (coke). not a good way to build the foundation of your life
BoyWhoreWithASword 7y ago
Holy shit the guy said he likes to do coke on the weekends not that he's building his life around it...
kremer5 7y ago
he is building his life on it in some way. i'm making a nuanced point.
offthebeatmeoff 7y ago
I'm going to play devils advocate and say that your obviously right, but on the most superficial level, it's a great way to get instant access to the hottest girls and best scenes in your area, if that's what your into
Horus_Krishna_2 7y ago
it seems like people always die from heroin, I don't hear about that with coke tho.
kremer5 7y ago
it's a short cut to that. again, not great for building the foundation of your character. but a man does as he wills
offthebeatmeoff 7y ago
Again, playing devils advocate, it's sort of like nailing your first high class sexy hooker/escort. It won't "make you a better person", but it will give you confidence and experience you just can't fake. It's a pretty big game changer to sleep with girls that hot, or in this case to get instant access to girls that hot. It will change your perspective in a positive way with respect to game. That being said it could hurt you everywhere else if your not smart or careful.
kremer5 7y ago
fucking a hot escort once is different than doing on the regular. we are talking about different scenarios.
offthebeatmeoff 7y ago
We're on the same page now. Yeah I agree with you for the most part. As long as you're responsible enough to treat those things as a tool it can help. For most people it will probably just hurt them
maxytracks 7y ago
I'm confused, I don't do coke but what do you mean it's a great way to get access to the hottest girls? Do these girls only hang out with you if you do coke?
offthebeatmeoff 7y ago
I'm going to copy and paste one of my previous responses to answer your first question then I'll hit your first. So to your first question.
I'll try my best. Feel free to ask more questions if I'm vague or give a shitty response in any way. Whether it is good or not, coke is viewed as a high class drug. If you think of coke, it is done by guys on wall street, the wealthier guys in clubs, and high powered men. So right there it's a status symbol. Girls are naturally attracted to free shit, and you can imagine there is a strong correlation between a girls level of sexiness and the quality of the free shit she gets. Imagine it as freshman girls fresh in college. The cooler guys who can get alcohol in general will attract girls in general. Now the guy who is pregaming with Ciroc and Petron will have a better pick of all the girls begging for free alcohol. Now this goes up to drugs as well. There are guys who will smoke girls out for free. The guy with the good weed will smoke out hotter girls, and now the guy with coke will be much higher on that ladder. Now if you're doing coke you're now indirectly in that circle and it's a big boost in social status for the specific scene of skanks who do those drugs. It gets you interacting with those girls or at least with the guys who are interacting with those hotter girls. Finally we can look at how it affects you. Cocaine is obviously a stimulant and we can talk about how it affects certain receptors and that stuff, but the jist of it is that it makes you feel like the fucking man. You are wired, alert and on top of the world. Your face is fucking numb, and you're ready to fuck Miss Universe and fight Mike Tyson. Your dick will be flaccid, and you'll get your ass beat, but you have the attitude that you can which in and of itself is very potent and damn near impossible to fake. As much as you can fake it or even have genuine confidence, you can't fake that Cocaine level of energy and confidence, and I'm sure some people would chime in and agree. I'm sure there is plenty that I am missing, but I believe those are the big three.
Now to your second question. It's sort of like any social circle. Don't get caught up with the fact that it is a drug. Imagine it more as a subset of the higher end bar/club scene. Like any social circle your probably only going to be able to get into it if your doing the one thing that circle is also doing. For example, I play volleyball and there is this whole little circle of girls, and they typically only date/fuck other guys who also play volleyball. Do some of them date/fuck other guys, well yeah they do. That being said, if you want to hangout and get access to these girls you're going to have to start playing volleyball to get at them most efficiently. It's the same principle with these girls. You're going to have to be at the same club/bar scenes and your going to be either doing/selling coke to get at them. Could you run into one at wholefoods while you do your shopping, yeah sure you can. Is it the best way to get access to them? No it's not, you have to snort it up like the rest of them and spit game and make moves.
maxytracks 7y ago
Wow, thanks for the thorough answer bro. I never knew coke was considered a high-class, then again I sometimes have trouble knowing the difference between coke and crack xD
Do you play volley ball for a club, or casually?
offthebeatmeoff 7y ago
I played pretty high level club, but I had to stop. I still play, but not quite at the level I'd like, but it gets the job done. It was mainly the people and the environment that really got me into it.
BehrGris 7y ago
Exactly. I bring pools of random hot girls and bottle waittresses to the after parties with coke, although a lot of times most of them besides one or two friends don't do coke.
Not saying that it's a good way to try and game women, but I've been going out doing sober game for a couple years and actually know how to game women without drugs; it's just fun for me.
And for a lot of guys the lure might be alcohol or weed for the girls. I just find girls who like to do what I like to do
[deleted] 7y ago
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BehrGris 7y ago
Me: "Wanna do some coke?"
Her: "Hell yeah"
Her friend: "Hell yeah"
She brings 5 other girls
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offthebeatmeoff 7y ago
This is a sub on sexual strategy. Coke is just a tool for getting top notch pussy. It won't help you build a business, meet a sweet feminine girl worthy of starting a family with, or make you more charming. You obviously get that and I'm not sure why anyone on this sub specifically would point out the obvious "it's not good for you"
menial_optimist 7y ago
I only object to it because I feel as though he's using coke to substitute weak game.
offthebeatmeoff 7y ago
Again, not a popular opinion, but game will help you infinitely for meeting/ sealing the deal with chicks, but it doesn't get your foot in the door or break through certain walls for you. Hot girls that do coke will typically get banged by guys in those circles. Fitness chicks usually get banged by guys in the same area. You won't fuck them by just being in the circle, that's where game comes in, but you do need to be in the circle (a very large majority of the time) to get seal the deal.
RobertCarraway 7y ago
Uh I don't know what sort of coke you've done, but I'm definitely significantly more charming and confident.
(when I've done it. I don't very often, for reasons stated by others)
offthebeatmeoff 7y ago
I meant in general like 7 PM on a Tuesday or 9:30 AM when you're talking to Cheryl from accounting, not during the time when you feel wide awake and ready to fuck shit up at 1230AM Friday night
dongpal 7y ago
can you explain why this is so?
offthebeatmeoff 7y ago
I'll try my best. Feel free to ask more questions if I'm vague or give a shitty response in any way. Whether it is good or not, coke is viewed as a high class drug. If you think of coke, it is done by guys on wall street, the wealthier guys in clubs, and high powered men. So right there it's a status symbol.
Girls are naturally attracted to free shit, and you can imagine there is a strong correlation between a girls level of sexiness and the quality of the free shit she gets. Imagine it as freshman girls fresh in college. The cooler guys who can get alcohol in general will attract girls in general. Now the guy who is pregaming with Ciroc and Petron will have a better pick of all the girls begging for free alcohol. Now this goes up to drugs as well. There are guys who will smoke girls out for free. The guy with the good weed will smoke out hotter girls, and now the guy with coke will be much higher on that ladder.
Now if you're doing coke you're now indirectly in that circle and it's a big boost in social status for the specific scene of skanks who do those drugs. It gets you interacting with those girls or at least with the guys who are interacting with those hotter girls.
Finally we can look at how it affects you. Cocaine is obviously a stimulant and we can talk about how it affects certain receptors and that stuff, but the jist of it is that it makes you feel like the fucking man. You are wired, alert and on top of the world. Your face is fucking numb, and you're ready to fuck Miss Universe and fight Mike Tyson. Your dick will be flaccid, and you'll get your ass beat, but you have the attitude that you can which in and of itself is very potent and damn near impossible to fake. As much as you can fake it or even have genuine confidence, you can't fake that Cocaine level of energy and confidence, and I'm sure some people would chime in and agree. I'm sure there is plenty that I am missing, but I believe those are the big three.
freedom_larry41 7y ago
Well stated OP. I got trapped in this mindset that cost me to dropped out of college a few years back. Now that I'm a lot more wiser, I realized how society glamorizes the college years. To the younger men, focus now on your goals. If you're not in a frat or partying every weekend, that's OK. Your working hard now to establish yourself; a brand.
sierratangovictor 7y ago
Please don't say this. This is a typical feminist, blue pill crap "Getting ready to do XYZ after fucking around".
This also makes every man working their ass off to shine in college look like a kindergarten child who is not "ready". Who the $&(" decides who is ready for what? You ? The average HB5.5 ? Society that considers Steve Jobs the benchmark of greatness and ignore Grigori Perelmann?
The patronization that only an older guy is "ready" and the younger is "not ready" is as blue pill as it can be.
The moment a man makes a choice, whether he realizes or not, he is ready to reap the crop. People don't get ready-er over time. Only that they start getting material success, and shallow society starts to validate them. The validation is not a measure of readiness.
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michael_wilkins 7y ago
Great post. I remember pre TRP I had this thought and while I managed to think about it enough and realise that there would be opportunities after uni, I came to the conclusion that life gets better, and if your uni days were the best of your life, you lived your life wrong.
Unfortunately at the time I used that as a way to make me feel better, instead of using it as a reminder to work hard now.
The_Dank_Astero 7y ago
Thanks for Letting Me Understand That After College, Life is actually better.
jewishsupremacist88 7y ago
as the economy tumbles more and more..there will be lots of opportunities to have aryan women as concubines for a not that much $$
muhDick
[deleted] 7y ago
That reddit handle...hahahaha
You're a fan of USA aren't you?
jewishsupremacist88 7y ago
ya i live in the USA, i support Trump and want to MAGA.
Althehistoryguy 7y ago
Thanks man. I turn 20 next week been having these same concerns.
Pastelitomaracucho 7y ago
Parties during university:
Cheap alcohol that makes you cry.
Drunk uninteresting women trying to squeeze money out of you
Bros playing macho and fighting for no reason
Always poor.
Parties now (I'm 32)
Absolutely mental weekend in Berlin
Conference and a week of partying in Scotland
I want something a bit more exotic? Mykonos it is. Maybe Malta.
Women? Much more to choose, or nothing at all. I just don't care anymore. Interesting ones in Berlin, instagram models in Mykonos, melting pot of insufferable bitches in the UK, crazy ones in the Med. You just have to pick a place and go.
And you drink whatever the fuck you want now.
criveros 7y ago
As 29 year old professional who left university 4 years ago. I can tell you that life is so much more awesome after university.
I've been partying up to 4 days a week, a minimum of 2. I build awesome social groups just buy being cool and social.
Another_Lee_Sin_Main 7y ago
As a seventeen year old in high school, thank you so much. I haven't had the "high school experience" and I did feel like I was missing out. My brother recently graduated from college at a party school, and I can see it for myself. You are completely right.
[deleted] 7y ago
As a 18 year old in higschool not having the "high-school experience" the best thing I did was get a job. I got it because I got tired of sitting around doing drugs all day during the summer. I have made friend with my 20+ year old co workers and it really makes you give less of a shit about higschool.
As far as chicks are concerned, if you don't have a lot of high SMV male friends you aren't gonna get normal hot chicks. It is way easier to go for the emo, goth, and scene chicks. Most of these girls are emotionally fucked up, have no friends, and only get attention from beta cucks.
askmrcia 7y ago
You have so much time. I didn't do shit in high school. I didn't even go to prom. And you know what? No body cared.
In college it will get way better. You have no idea. And after college it's get 10x better. Just continue developing yourself and working on your social skills and you will be fine. By the time you get to college no one will care about what you did in high school.
Vanq86 7y ago
As a 30 year old, this post in bang on the money. I'm enjoying life far more now than I ever did when I was in college. Once you escape the societal pressures and focus on what you actually want, instead of what you've been conditioned to think you want, things just get better and better.
No matter how bad things seem right now, don't fret. The deck is stacked against men of college age, society conditions us worship the nubile female form and to feel like shit if we aren't 'winning' the social game, but it's all bullshit. Once you get past it and enter the real world, things flip end for end very quickly - the guys who studied hard and landed good jobs now have the time and money to enjoy themselves - exactly the same traits that made those 'winners' in college proverbial 'pussy magnets'.
[deleted] 7y ago
23, I obtained a physics masters back in June. Already this feels 100% right. Dating a hot Turkish girl and a great Spaniard already, not fucking with you.
As long as you follow redpill and get an actually useful degree from a decent or better university your options right out the gate are already good and are only going up as your social status, cash, confidence and ability to "hard next" go up.
Also, the alcohol is only better if you want it to be. I've got a growing collection of wines and whisky. I'm also going to start learning mixology soon. These are great skills/knowledge for crowds outside of college. I was never respected more for having better taste in alcohol in college (who cares dude let's just get drunk) but outside of it the other guys seem surprised, excited and envious. I've made a lot of friends by sharing my booze (only a bit) and knowledge.
Side note (this is getting long) I've found women enjoy beer tasting if you make sure there is a nice bartender who is knowledgeable and they find one they like. Most women think beer is just to get drunk (I suppose most guys too) but it's not.
Your_Coke_Dealer 7y ago
This isn't a rebuttal per se, but I like to think college is what you make of it. I'm in my last year now actually, and while I agree it isn't amazing for everyone, and definitely not the peak of my life, it's been good.
I made strong friendships, learned life lessons, had fun, gained experience, and set myself on a course for better things. I didn't do it all, but I enjoyed what I did and did it my way. You say "the right fraternity", or to have easier classes for more social life. In that case I did it wrong. I didn't join a fraternity with the highest status but one with the best guys. I'm in a STEM field. But hey, I don't think life is about the prestige or hedonism. I improved myself, and while I wasn't the top-house alpha who shows off which sorority girls he bangs, I've been the guy banging those girls on the DL. To my character, I'm not the kind of guy who likes to share the best pictures of me in the coolest places on social media just to make others jealous. I'd rather just go there, enjoy it and not waste my time taking photos.
What I'm saying is: do it for you, not for how others see you. Others will forget bragging and showing off, but you'll always have your memories and experiences
writemeoffgiveuponme 7y ago
Ahhhh shit man. I needed this post so bad. I'm 23 and never went to college and have always felt like I totally missed out. Thanks man
SchlagerScar 7y ago
I thought "Goddamnit another rant from this guy" but you turned it around, well done.
A lot of words here. How about this: Do whatever you want. You're not held down by "society's message" or whatever horseshit.
Also, 80/20. Bottom line.
KorianHUN 7y ago
Just to add my perspective, this mentality is appearing in eastern europe (Hungary) too. I still feel like i'm "missing out" sometimes but Redpill made me realize i should focus on my well being instead of worrying.
I also have no debt and plan on keeping it this way, but i will have higher paying trades in 3 years.
I_dontevenlift 7y ago
Good post, but there is one point I disagree in, which ks that a very small number of guys experience the "college experience." About half the guys did at my school and neighboring schools, not just rich kids with easy majors. Just my 2c
RPFlame 7y ago
Pretty much fucking hitting the nail on the head. The reason there's such push is because 20-30 is the best years of woman's life, and we all know that pretty much that society = catering to female needs.
Look at your 30+ fresh red pillers feeling so good for throwing their college lives under the bus to get drunk and have parties, instead of building the foundations that will serve as their future "temple" (house, car and all desired luxuries), alongside a career they can give a fuck about and doesn't make them hate their life trapped in debt.
I said it before and I'll say it again: A man throwing the majority of his youth to time-wasting activities with no long-term investment is akin to the female slut that spreads her legs to every Chad.
hb8only 7y ago
well there is one real thing to don't forget
each year you enjoy new or old things less and less
especially after 30, when I finally buy/reach something I dreamt a lot about, the response is very mildly..
you can yahoo it out that many people are having the same state of mind - after certain age, things and experiments are not so exciting anymore..
play it hard as young!! don't even think to wait years to have fun and experiences!!!
blackierobinsin6 7y ago
American women get fat after college so Latina/Asian women are always better long term
vengefully_yours 7y ago
This is to the guys who think they're missing out.
Pull your head out of your ass, college is not about parties and panties, it's about fucking learning. If you're not there to get the information and knowledge you want to make your life better, you are wasting time and money being there. If you have a bullshit major that is easy to get, you're wasting time and money. If your grades suck because you're not applying yourself and your more concerned with a social life, you're wasting your time and money.
I went to school after 4 years in the military, yeah I had parties and got laid, but I was there for a reason, to fucking learn shit I didn't know and to get a piece of paper that says I know what the fuck I'm doing. My social life fucked me over, I got married to a chick I knocked up, she talked me into taking a semester off to help with the kid. That turned into 5 fucking years. Those are wasted years. Job, home, fight with the cunt, eat, sleep, repeat.
You can fuck up your life if you lose focus. If you're focused on bullshit, your life will be shit.
Now the reality check you don't want to hear. That BS is about as useful as a high school diploma. You need far more than a measly 4 year degree to use it to get a better position, unless it's in one of a dwindling number of disciplines. That means 8 to 12 years of work. It's not 1965, that bs gets you jack shit in 2016. Are you in it for the right reasons or do your plans include being the most educated barrista at the local Starbucks?
Chase pussy and parties, and waste your time. You're not missing a damn thing if you're killing it in school. You're damn right we want to fuck everything with a cunt when we are in our 20s. Wear a rubber and do that when the opportunity arises, but don't let that he your focus. Those bitches will be old and nasty in ten years, with a new crop of 18 year old girls coming into the world every month.
You're not a girl, don't be so fucking shortsighted like they are. We play the long game, they have until 29 to get theirs in, shit, our lives are just getting going good at 30 if you play it right. Fuck up like I did and you have to work harder to make it up and it doesn't get fun until 40. Mind you I have had a jerk of a lot of fun since high school, done amazing things and got paid to do them, but if I could go back and do it over shit would be very different. Don't make my mistakes.
Your choice. Waste time, or invest now. It's like money. Do the math. Invest $200 a month in a 3% account starting at 19, and see where you are money wise at 40. Now invest $500 a month starting at 35 and see where you are at 50. The long game pays better.
aanarchist 7y ago
true why envy a dude who had a blast in his teens and 20s, got together with and started to play house with single mom with mediocre job that he hates. if anything he should envy you for having freedom and opportunities. hell the mgtow life of porn and video games was always better than being in a relationship, personally.
Horus_Krishna_2 7y ago
yeah it'd be the relationship < mgtow < red pill man getting laid and not caring
RedPillAlphaBigCock 7y ago
Tremendous post. I was close friends with a lot of "chads" in college. They had a MUCH easier course than me. They could go out and socialize much more than me. They banged much more than me. I was often alone studying in my room - but that's a small price to pay:
Then Boom. The summer we finished we all moved home. I read and lifted like crazy (Emphasis on the reading and self discovery of what I wanted in life )and got a great job. I was crushing it. I presumed they were too. Then a few months later we met up and hung out. I scared the shit out of them. I was even surprised. I was a redpill man crushing it in reality and all they could talk about is the fun we had in college. We even broke in to our old campus for a laugh after going out. All they could talk about is how awesome it was, and how all they wanted to do was go back.
Also you can have a lot of fun in college - The key thing is that if you set your expectations really high (social conditioning) you will be disappointed. The reality is it's not all partying - there is work to do - and fun to have
bitchpotatobunny 7y ago
This man speaks the truth. I'm turning 34 this Saturday and one of my biggest issues is trying to figure out which plate I'm going to invite over, or if I'm going to see if I can't pick something up for the night. I've only been single for a month, and while I never had a hard time with women when I was younger, it's absolutely ridiculous how easy it is now.
Honestly, once you're in your 30's and you've got your shit together (appearance, attitude, and finances) life is so much more fun. You've got the means to do the things you want, you've got the knowledge and experience to enjoy finer things, and women are more attracted to you for it.
AmericanHistoryAFBB 7y ago
I needed this today. 24, still haven't finished college, feel like I'm missing out and that I did miss out by not attending sooner, and going to an actual university instead of a nice city college.
I keep feeling that quarter life crisis coming on, and am at that phase where i want to do everything I didn't do at 18-21 because I was too plugged in back then and missed out on a LOT of opportunities.
StuttBuffer 7y ago
I definitely felt that way when I was in college. In hindsight, I went off to school with way too many expectations about sex and my social life. I didn't realize that the change of scenery/being away from home was going to be such a shock to my system.
Looking back, I was just one of thousands of insecure high school kids leaving home for the first time, trying to reinvent myself, establish a new social base, bang a bunch of girls, and acheive academic success all at once. That is a tall order for an 18 year old kid. At that age, you feel like you should be all grown up and have your act together, but really you're still developing mentally, and there is plenty of life after college.
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MrNatemare 7y ago
For anyone in their early 20s (in my late 20s now), I can verify that this is definitely true. Don't do something (party, go out of your way to date girls) for the sake of it because it is supposed to be part of the "college experience". If your family is not super rich the most important thing to do in college is to get your grades up, do internships, make friends, and plan out your career. Trust me, the real game starts when you settle in a good career and you just keep improving yourself. Nobody can tell you what to do and you will find that a lot of the "popular" kids in your college time have now disappeared from the market because they wasted their time and is now stuck in a dead end job with no prospect or money. As a man, your career really defines you as a person.
I wish someone told me about this when I was in my early 20s.
GoGoGo_PowerRanger94 7y ago
Its not the rich kids who get to experience the ideal, dream college/university experience... Its actually the guys in the top 10-20% that do. That has nothing to do with having rich parents as to be in the top 10-20% of all men.. (ie if your not attractive, not good looking, or if your not tall or well hung or buff/in-shape.. Your not in the top 10-20â„… etc. Its those guys who are socially privileged, viewed as worthwhile human beings with an intrinsic value and are viewed as the height of male sexuality n masculinity with all the positives and benefits that comes with that and it's those guys who get the majority of the sex and they can pick n choose. A fast food mentality. Those top 10-20% guys are the ones people hypocritically fawn over n throw themselves at). Its down to genetics not rich parents that determines if you get to have the dream college experience.
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[deleted] 7y ago
100% true. I dropped out of college when I was 20 because I felt so misplaced, not to mention the absurd tuition fees of college here. Recently I started traveling Europe and it's been such a better experience. Girls there are intelligent, can hold a conversation about something other than fucking twilight or harry potter. Not to mention a huge upgrade in the looks and personality department. I hope more and more guys read this and reject the blue pill media propaganda. There's so much more the world has to offer.
donaldcicc 7y ago
I failed out my first time around in college and went back part time for a while and then finally graduated with three BA's in physics, applied mathematics and philosophy. I currently live in Shanghai, I have traveled all over Asia and have had many amazing experiences out here. I am exotic too which adds to my charm. ;)
Great advice. Men have a much longer shelf life than women. A man in his thirties or forties doing well in his career has a plethora of options. Take it to heart young guys.
It can be especially difficult for you to put off short term pleasure for the long term goals, hell your brain is still developing the part that helps with the type of decision so you need to work extra hard top discipline yourselves. But it will be worth it. Do your best to find a balance. Find time to lift, take some martial arts if your school offers any classes or has martial arts clubs, make some good friends and have some fun. Do not worry about the pussy, it will come. And you will have the chance to get that great college stuff later. I have been getting some college girls here in Sh and elsewhere in Asia and I am 48. Listen to OP.
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VasiliyZaitzev 7y ago
Yes, it will come. (Pun intended).
Women are actually a lagging indicator of success. Young guys should focus on building themselves, and not worrying abt girls, which I realize sounds counterintuitive, but so it goes.
SovereignSoul76 7y ago
Please note also, that the days of "Animal House" are looooong gone. All colleges and universities now have been massively feminized. Wanna act like a man? You'd better do it in a way that doesn't offend anyone, isolate anyone, or even raise any eyebrows. In other words, you really can't. If you're a straight, white male in college, you've got a target on your back, bud. These schools are 100% designed as collectivist/authoritarian prep schools for the ever expanding nanny state. Even if you don't break a law, they can kick you out and void your 1, 2, 3, 3.5 years of hard work. Poof. Because they're in charge, not you. These administrative types at colleges are people who CRAVE power, but don't have the intelligence or emotional stability to actually amass it legitimately.
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stawek 7y ago
If you think you are missing out look at the women: they DO get all those college experiences. They do get tons of sex, parties and booze. Now look at them after a few years of such life. Aren't you happy you're "missing out"?
Rougepellet 7y ago
I'm in Uni now and I'll be damned if i let THIS be as good as it gets.
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Ex-AlodianKnight 7y ago
az a 27 year old, looks like this gave me hope to hit up college bars and make college fri1nds.
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PM-ME-YOUR-SEXTAPE 7y ago
But I am in NYC.... Gotcha.
growingstronk 7y ago
The thing about NYC is its the greatest city for everything could ever want... for those of status
Which brings us back to "work hard and make something of yourself."
dart200 7y ago
bitch the world is not yours. there's 7 billion fucking people on this planet, and if we don't fucking learn to work together, the whole ship is going to fucking sink.
i pretty much only have hope that this generation is capable of it.
Horus_Krishna_2 7y ago
it's a figure of speech. life is a mix of competition and cooperation, but competition wins out cuz we're stuck in our brains. Life is short, how to maximize it, have to look out for yourself. We could advocate for world socialism to make a utopia but it's not realistic.
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dart200 7y ago
no it's really not. it's a way of life everyone is trying to fulfill.
bitch we have so many people trying to maximize a short life we're fucking the world trying to step over each other.
maybe life doesn't have to be short, but we'd have to moderate ourselves for that to happen.
idiot, today's world is not realistic. it's not going to last. it's not sustainable. fucking delusional you are, listening to the lies of previous generations that idealism is just not possible. what a fucking bullshit self-limiting mentality that is.
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