As gay as this title sounds hear me out, I came across the subreddit 3 years ago after I ended a horrible relationship of 5 years and one of you fucks DMed me telling me to check it out. Spent 3 years reading, maybe about 2 actually acting out theories I've learned. My life used to consist of constantly chasing girls to get laid after finding it much easier than before, until I realized that this was just me "acting alpha." The true satisfaction came from getting respect from men.

In my day to day life, I come across more encounters with men than women, and I started realizing that I got just as many shit tests from my guy friends/acquaintances as I did with females. I used to feel like I was "low on the food chain" in high school and college when around other guys. When I talked, they didn't care about my opinion as much as some other guys but I never really understood why. After learning red pill theory and reading a few books on this, it became much clearer.

Girls shit test you to see if you're worth their time. Guys shit test you to see if you're worth their respect.

Some examples in my life:

  • I work out 6 days a week now. I have guys approach me and say something along the lines of "I thought you were supposed to be big and strong now??" My old response would have been "I'm stronger than you are!" I remember always defending myself in situations like this, and as a result the guys would smile knowing they just got under my skin in a couple seconds and have brushed me off as a guy not worth their respect. My new response: "Ha yeah it's a slow and steady process." Despite seeming like I am agreeing with them about not being big and strong, I am shutting down their accusations. I've shown them I don't care what they're opinions of me are, I'm confident in my work and progress. This earns their respect.

  • I started my own business a couple years ago and quit my old job as a pharmacy technician. I made nothing the first year, but ended up making quite a lot in the second year and my small ass local city made a few stories about it in the newspaper. My old friends from high school talk about it (it's a weird business) and will say things to me such as "Uh oh aren't you too famous to be around us?" Keep in mind if my close friends give me shit I just consider it funny, sometimes you gotta give each other shit like this. However, these are male acquaintances and will often say things like this in front of women as an attempt to discredit my frame. My old response would've been along the lines of "Sorry some of us were successful in life!" I would've shown these guys and the girls with them that I clearly don't have faith in my success when a simple roast was able to upset me. My new response- "Ha yeah the news likes to make things bigger than they are."

  • I bought a Corvette after saving for awhile. I've always wanted one, and found a good deal on somewhat newer one in good shape. It's kinda cool (it's a Corvette, not a Ferrari.) I've never had so many people try and "discredit" my car before. At a 4th of July party a few high school friends came up to me when I was talking to a decent looking girl. They immediately say "Tyler's (fake name, friend with pretty cool supra) car is way cooler than yours." It's funny how in these situations girls carefully watch to see how you handle yourself. They view it as an old school 1v1 duel, the winner taking their frame. My old response (I never had a cool car, but if old me was in this position rather) would have been "Do you know anything about my car? Dude it's way faster than you think, you don't know cars at all." Again, this is bad. The girl I was talking to would've seen right through my insecurities and this guy's shit test would've essentially worked. Subconsciously, most guys want to do this to you in front of girls, it's our new age way of fighting off other mates. Now I'll just reply "Oh shit isn't that thing awesome? Jealous of him." (It really is an incredible car anyways.)

These are a few examples, but now that I am able to recognize these "shit tests" from guys I catch them almost every day in every situation especially in front of other girls. The funny thing is, after you hold frame in front of guys, I find that they completely switch their perspective. Instead of roasting you for working out in front of the girl you're talking to, they will immediately start asking for tips and what kind of protein you take, etc. They now seek your validation. They go from "Dude nice joggers, they sell those for men?" To "Haha just kidding man, they look super comfortable how much were they?"

I once third wheeled my friend on a Tinder date and spent a half an hour hearing him rip on me to the girl I had literally just met. "He barely works." "He had a one night stand with this ugly girl once." I simply brushed everything off, chuckled and acted like it didn't matter. The fucking weirdest thing is the girl started defending me to him. She would say "well is he not allowed to vacation??" As soon as this happened I knew this guy fucked up. I left with no interest in being a tool for his ego, and he texted me 2 days later saying "yeah she told me she didn't fuck on the first date so I dropped her off." His attempt to climb above my status failed, and turned her off.

It is essentially a social ladder and guys want to see where they place. After holding frame, they now seek to be close to you seeing as they now view you as higher than them on this ladder. Think of the coolest, most confident guys you know. Chances are, you could say any kind of insult to them and they wouldn't even think about it for more than a second. If I told Leonardo Dicaprio I thought his acting sucked, do you really think he'd defend himself to me? Of course not. Being able to hold frame in front of women can get you laid, being able to hold frame in front of men can get you respected. One is much more satisfying to me to be honest.

Tl:Dr - Hold frame in front of men as much as you do women. Men shit test too, and passing a guys shit test in front of a woman can get you laid as easily. 2 birds, 1 stone.